第6章
加入书架 A- A+
点击下载App,搜索"Winesburg, Ohio",免费读到尾

  Oneeveningwhenhewasrecoveringfromalongdebauchthestrangercamereelingalongthemainstreetofthetown。TomHardsatinachairbeforetheNewWillardHousewithhisdaughter,thenachildoffive,onhisknees。BesidehimontheboardsidewalksatyoungGeorgeWillard。Thestrangerdroppedintoachairbesidethem。Hisbodyshookandwhenhetriedtotalkhisvoicetrembled。

  Itwaslateeveninganddarknesslayoverthetownandovertherailroadthatranalongthefootofalittleinclinebeforethehotel。Somewhereinthedistance,offtothewest,therewasaprolongedblastfromthewhistleofapassengerengine。Adogthathadbeensleepingintheroadwayaroseandbarked。

  Thestrangerbegantobabbleandmadeaprophecyconcerningthechildthatlayinthearmsoftheagnostic。

  \"Icameheretoquitdrinking,\"hesaid,andtearsbegantorundownhischeeks。HedidnotlookatTomHard,butleanedforwardandstaredintothedarknessasthoughseeingavision。\"Iranawaytothecountrytobecured,butIamnotcured。Thereisareason。\"Heturnedtolookatthechildwhosatupverystraightonherfather\'skneeandreturnedthelook。

  ThestrangertouchedTomHardonthearm。

  \"DrinkisnottheonlythingtowhichIamad-

  dicted,\"hesaid。\"Thereissomethingelse。Iamaloverandhavenotfoundmythingtolove。ThatisabigpointifyouknowenoughtorealizewhatI

  mean。Itmakesmydestructioninevitable,yousee。

  Therearefewwhounderstandthat。\"

  Thestrangerbecamesilentandseemedovercomewithsadness,butanotherblastfromthewhistleofthepassengerenginearousedhim。\"Ihavenotlostfaith。Iproclaimthat。IhaveonlybeenbroughttotheplacewhereIknowmyfaithwillnotbereal-

  ized,\"hedeclaredhoarsely。Helookedhardatthechildandbegantoaddressher,payingnomoreat-

  tentiontothefather。\"Thereisawomancoming,\"

  hesaid,andhisvoicewasnowsharpandearnest。

  \"Ihavemissedher,yousee。Shedidnotcomeinmytime。Youmaybethewoman。Itwouldbelikefatetoletmestandinherpresenceonce,onsuchaneveningasthis,whenIhavedestroyedmyselfwithdrinkandsheisasyetonlyachild。\"

  Theshouldersofthestrangershookviolently,andwhenhetriedtorollacigarettethepaperfellfromhistremblingfingers。Hegrewangryandscolded。

  \"Theythinkit\'seasytobeawoman,tobeloved,butIknowbetter,\"hedeclared。Againheturnedtothechild。\"Iunderstand,\"hecried。\"PerhapsofallmenIaloneunderstand。\"

  Hisglanceagainwanderedawaytothedarkenedstreet。\"Iknowabouther,althoughshehasnevercrossedmypath,\"hesaidsoftly。\"Iknowaboutherstrugglesandherdefeats。Itisbecauseofherdefeatsthatsheistomethelovelyone。Outofherdefeatshasbeenbornanewqualityinwoman。Ihaveanameforit。IcallitTandy。ImadeupthenamewhenIwasatruedreamerandbeforemybodybecamevile。Itisthequalityofbeingstrongtobeloved。Itissomethingmenneedfromwomenandthattheydonotget。\"

  ThestrangeraroseandstoodbeforeTomHard。

  Hisbodyrockedbackandforthandheseemedabouttofall,butinsteadhedroppedtohiskneesonthesidewalkandraisedthehandsofthelittlegirltohisdrunkenlips。Hekissedthemecstatically。

  \"BeTandy,littleone,\"hepleaded。\"Daretobestrongandcourageous。Thatistheroad。Ventureanything。Bebraveenoughtodaretobeloved。Besomethingmorethanmanorwoman。BeTandy。\"

  Thestrangeraroseandstaggeredoffdownthestreet。AdayortwolaterhegotaboardatrainandreturnedtohishomeinCleveland。Onthesummerevening,afterthetalkbeforethehotel,TomHardtookthegirlchildtothehouseofarelativewhereshehadbeeninvitedtospendthenight。Ashewentalonginthedarknessunderthetreesheforgotthebabblingvoiceofthestrangerandhismindreturnedtothemakingofargumentsbywhichhemightde-

  stroymen\'sfaithinGod。Hespokehisdaughter\'snameandshebegantoweep。

  \"Idon\'twanttobecalledthat,\"shedeclared。\"I

  wanttobecalledTandy——TandyHard。\"ThechildweptsobitterlythatTomHardwastouchedandtriedtocomforther。Hestoppedbeneathatreeand,takingherintohisarms,begantocaressher。\"Begood,now,\"hesaidsharply;butshewouldnotbequieted。Withchildishabandonshegaveherselfovertogrief,hervoicebreakingtheeveningstillnessofthestreet。\"IwanttobeTandy。IwanttobeTandy。IwanttobeTandyHard,\"shecried,shak-

  ingherheadandsobbingasthoughheryoungstrengthwerenotenoughtobearthevisionthewordsofthedrunkardhadbroughttoher。

  THESTRENGTHOFGOD

  THEREVERENDCurtisHartmanwaspastorofthePresbyterianChurchofWinesburg,andhadbeeninthatpositiontenyears。Hewasfortyyearsold,andbyhisnatureverysilentandreticent。Topreach,standinginthepulpitbeforethepeople,wasalwaysahardshipforhimandfromWednesdaymorninguntilSaturdayeveninghethoughtofnothingbutthetwosermonsthatmustbepreachedonSunday。

  EarlyonSundaymorninghewentintoalittleroomcalledastudyinthebelltowerofthechurchandprayed。Inhisprayerstherewasonenotethatal-

  wayspredominated。\"GivemestrengthandcourageforThywork,OLord!\"hepleaded,kneelingonthebarefloorandbowinghisheadinthepresenceofthetaskthatlaybeforehim。

  TheReverendHartmanwasatallmanwithabrownbeard。Hiswife,astout,nervouswoman,wasthedaughterofamanufacturerofunderwearatCleveland,Ohio。Theministerhimselfwasratherafavoriteinthetown。TheeldersofthechurchlikedhimbecausehewasquietandunpretentiousandMrs。White,thebanker\'swife,thoughthimschol-

  arlyandrefined。

  ThePresbyterianChurchhelditselfsomewhatalooffromtheotherchurchesofWinesburg。Itwaslargerandmoreimposinganditsministerwasbetterpaid。Heevenhadacarriageofhisownandonsummereveningssometimesdroveabouttownwithhiswife。ThroughMainStreetandupanddownBuckeyeStreethewent,bowinggravelytothepeo-

  ple,whilehiswife,afirewithsecretpride,lookedathimoutofthecornersofhereyesandworriedlestthehorsebecomefrightenedandrunaway。

  ForagoodmanyyearsafterhecametoWines-

  burgthingswentwellwithCurtisHartman。Hewasnotonetoarousekeenenthusiasmamongthewor-

  shippersinhischurchbutontheotherhandhemadenoenemies。Inrealityhewasmuchinearnestandsometimessufferedprolongedperiodsofre-

  morsebecausehecouldnotgocryingthewordofGodinthehighwaysandbywaysofthetown。HewonderediftheflameofthespiritreallyburnedinhimanddreamedofadaywhenastrongsweetnewcurrentofpowerwouldcomelikeagreatwindintohisvoiceandhissoulandthepeoplewouldtremblebeforethespiritofGodmademanifestinhim。\"I

  amapoorstickandthatwillneverreallyhappentome,\"hemuseddejectedly,andthenapatientsmilelituphisfeatures。\"Ohwell,IsupposeI\'mdoingwellenough,\"headdedphilosophically。

  Theroominthebelltowerofthechurch,whereonSundaymorningstheministerprayedforanin-

  creaseinhimofthepowerofGod,hadbutonewindow。Itwaslongandnarrowandswungout-

  wardonahingelikeadoor。Onthewindow,madeoflittleleadedpanes,wasadesignshowingtheChristlayinghishandupontheheadofachild。

  OneSundaymorninginthesummerashesatbyhisdeskintheroomwithalargeBibleopenedbe-

  forehim,andthesheetsofhissermonscatteredabout,theministerwasshockedtosee,intheupperroomofthehousenextdoor,awomanlyinginherbedandsmokingacigarettewhileshereadabook。

  CurtisHartmanwentontiptoetothewindowandcloseditsoftly。Hewashorrorstrickenatthethoughtofawomansmokingandtrembledalsotothinkthathiseyes,justraisedfromthepagesofthebookofGod,hadlookeduponthebareshouldersandwhitethroatofawoman。Withhisbraininawhirlhewentdownintothepulpitandpreachedalongsermonwithoutoncethinkingofhisgesturesorhisvoice。Thesermonattractedunusualattentionbecauseofitspowerandclearness。\"Iwonderifsheislistening,ifmyvoiceiscarryingamessageintohersoul,\"hethoughtandbegantohopethatonfutureSundaymorningshemightbeabletosaywordsthatwouldtouchandawakenthewomanapparentlyfargoneinsecretsin。

  ThehousenextdoortothePresbyterianChurch,throughthewindowsofwhichtheministerhadseenthesightthathadsoupsethim,wasoccupiedbytwowomen。AuntElizabethSwift,agreycompetent-

  lookingwidowwithmoneyintheWinesburgNa-

  tionalBank,livedtherewithherdaughterKateSwift,aschoolteacher。Theschoolteacherwasthirtyyearsoldandhadaneattrim-lookingfigure。

  Shehadfewfriendsandboreareputationofhavingasharptongue。Whenhebegantothinkabouther,CurtisHartmanrememberedthatshehadbeentoEuropeandhadlivedfortwoyearsinNewYorkCity。\"Perhapsafterallhersmokingmeansnoth-

  ing,\"hethought。Hebegantorememberthatwhenhewasastudentincollegeandoccasionallyreadnovels,goodalthoughsomewhatworldlywomen,hadsmokedthroughthepagesofabookthathadoncefallenintohishands。Witharushofnewdeter-

  minationheworkedonhissermonsallthroughtheweekandforgot,inhiszealtoreachtheearsandthesoulofthisnewlistener,bothhisembarrassmentinthepulpitandthenecessityofprayerinthestudyonSundaymornings。

  ReverendHartman\'sexperiencewithwomenhadbeensomewhatlimited。HewasthesonofawagonmakerfromMuncie,Indiana,andhadworkedhiswaythroughcollege。Thedaughteroftheunder-

  wearmanufacturerhadboardedinahousewherehelivedduringhisschooldaysandhehadmarriedherafteraformalandprolongedcourtship,carriedonforthemostpartbythegirlherself。Onhismar-

  riagedaytheunderwearmanufacturerhadgivenhisdaughterfivethousanddollarsandhepromisedtoleaveheratleasttwicethatamountinhiswill。Theministerhadthoughthimselffortunateinmarriageandhadneverpermittedhimselftothinkofotherwomen。Hedidnotwanttothinkofotherwomen。

  WhathewantedwastodotheworkofGodquietlyandearnestly。

  Inthesouloftheministerastruggleawoke。FromwantingtoreachtheearsofKateSwift,andthroughhissermonstodelveintohersoul,hebegantowantalsotolookagainatthefigurelyingwhiteandquietinthebed。OnaSundaymorningwhenhecouldnotsleepbecauseofhisthoughtshearoseandwenttowalkinthestreets。WhenhehadgonealongMainStreetalmosttotheoldRichmondplacehestoppedandpickingupastonerushedofftotheroominthebelltower。WiththestonehebrokeoutacornerofthewindowandthenlockedthedoorandsatdownatthedeskbeforetheopenBibletowait。WhentheshadeofthewindowtoKateSwift\'sroomwasraisedhecouldsee,throughthehole,directlyintoherbed,butshewasnotthere。ShealsohadarisenandhadgoneforawalkandthehandthatraisedtheshadewasthehandofAuntElizabethSwift。

  Theministeralmostweptwithjoyatthisdeliver-

  ancefromthecarnaldesireto\"peep\"andwentbacktohisownhousepraisingGod。Inanillmomentheforgot,however,tostoptheholeinthewindow。

  ThepieceofglassbrokenoutatthecornerofthewindowjustnippedoffthebareheeloftheboystandingmotionlessandlookingwithrapteyesintothefaceoftheChrist。

  CurtisHartmanforgothissermononthatSundaymorning。Hetalkedtohiscongregationandinhistalksaidthatitwasamistakeforpeopletothinkoftheirministerasamansetasideandintendedbynaturetoleadablamelesslife。\"OutofmyownexperienceIknowthatwe,whoaretheministersofGod\'sword,arebesetbythesametemptationsthatassailyou,\"hedeclared。\"Ihavebeentemptedandhavesurrenderedtotemptation。ItisonlythehandofGod,placedbeneathmyhead,thathasraisedmeup。Ashehasraisedmesoalsowillheraiseyou。

  Donotdespair。Inyourhourofsinraiseyoureyestotheskiesandyouwillbeagainandagainsaved。\"

  Resolutelytheministerputthethoughtsofthewomaninthebedoutofhismindandbegantobesomethinglikealoverinthepresenceofhiswife。

  OneeveningwhentheydroveouttogetherheturnedthehorseoutofBuckeyeStreetandinthedarknessonGospelHill,aboveWaterworksPond,puthisarmaboutSarahHartman\'swaist。Whenhehadeatenbreakfastinthemorningandwasreadytoretiretohisstudyatthebackofhishousehewentaroundthetableandkissedhiswifeonthecheek。WhenthoughtsofKateSwiftcameintohishead,hesmiledandraisedhiseyestotheskies。

  \"Intercedeforme,Master,\"hemuttered,\"keepmeinthenarrowpathintentonThywork。\"

  Andnowbegantherealstruggleinthesoulofthebrown-beardedminister。Bychancehediscov-

  eredthatKateSwiftwasinthehabitoflyinginherbedintheeveningsandreadingabook。Alampstoodonatablebythesideofthebedandthelightstreameddownuponherwhiteshouldersandbarethroat。Ontheeveningwhenhemadethediscoverytheministersatatthedeskinthedustyroomfromnineuntilafterelevenandwhenherlightwasputoutstumbledoutofthechurchtospendtwomorehourswalkingandprayinginthestreets。HedidnotwanttokisstheshouldersandthethroatofKateSwiftandhadnotallowedhismindtodwellonsuchthoughts。Hedidnotknowwhathewanted。

  \"IamGod\'schildandhemustsavemefrommy-

  self,\"hecried,inthedarknessunderthetreesashewanderedinthestreets。Byatreehestoodandlookedattheskythatwascoveredwithhurryingclouds。HebegantotalktoGodintimatelyandclosely。\"Please,Father,donotforgetme。Givemepowertogotomorrowandrepairtheholeinthewindow。Liftmyeyesagaintotheskies。Staywithme,Thyservant,inhishourofneed。\"

  Upanddownthroughthesilentstreetswalkedtheministerandfordaysandweekshissoulwastroubled。Hecouldnotunderstandthetemptationthathadcometohimnorcouldhefathomtherea-

  sonforitscoming。InawayhebegantoblameGod,sayingtohimselfthathehadtriedtokeephisfeetinthetruepathandhadnotrunaboutseekingsin。

  \"ThroughmydaysasayoungmanandallthroughmylifehereIhavegonequietlyaboutmywork,\"

  hedeclared。\"WhynowshouldIbetempted?WhathaveIdonethatthisburdenshouldbelaidonme?\"

  ThreetimesduringtheearlyfallandwinterofthatyearCurtisHartmancreptoutofhishousetotheroominthebelltowertositinthedarknesslookingatthefigureofKateSwiftlyinginherbedandlaterwenttowalkandprayinthestreets。Hecouldnotunderstandhimself。Forweekshewouldgoalongscarcelythinkingoftheschoolteacherandtellinghimselfthathehadconqueredthecarnalde-

  siretolookatherbody。Andthensomethingwouldhappen。Ashesatinthestudyofhisownhouse,hardatworkonasermon,hewouldbecomener-

  vousandbegintowalkupanddowntheroom。\"I

  willgooutintothestreets,\"hetoldhimselfandevenashelethimselfinatthechurchdoorheper-

  sistentlydeniedtohimselfthecauseofhisbeingthere。\"IwillnotrepairtheholeinthewindowandIwilltrainmyselftocomehereatnightandsitinthepresenceofthiswomanwithoutraisingmyeyes。

  Iwillnotbedefeatedinthisthing。TheLordhasdevisedthistemptationasatestofmysoulandI

  willgropemywayoutofdarknessintothelightofrighteousness。\"

  OnenightinJanuarywhenitwasbittercoldandsnowlaydeeponthestreetsofWinesburgCurtisHartmanpaidhislastvisittotheroominthebelltowerofthechurch。Itwaspastnineo\'clockwhenhelefthisownhouseandhesetoutsohurriedlythatheforgottoputonhisovershoes。InMainStreetnoonewasabroadbutHopHigginsthenightwatchmanandinthewholetownnoonewasawakebutthewatchmanandyoungGeorgeWillard,whosatintheofficeoftheWinesburgEagletryingtowriteastory。Alongthestreettothechurchwenttheminister,plowingthroughthedriftsandthinkingthatthistimehewouldutterlygivewaytosin。\"I

  wanttolookatthewomanandtothinkofkissinghershouldersandIamgoingtoletmyselfthinkwhatIchoose,\"hedeclaredbitterlyandtearscameintohiseyes。Hebegantothinkthathewouldgetoutoftheministryandtrysomeotherwayoflife。

  \"Ishallgotosomecityandgetintobusiness,\"hedeclared。\"IfmynatureissuchthatIcannotresistsin,Ishallgivemyselfovertosin。AtleastIshallnotbeahypocrite,preachingthewordofGodwithmymindthinkingoftheshouldersandneckofawomanwhodoesnotbelongtome。\"

  ItwascoldintheroomofthebelltowerofthechurchonthatJanuarynightandalmostassoonashecameintotheroomCurtisHartmanknewthatifhestayedhewouldbeill。Hisfeetwerewetfromtrampinginthesnowandtherewasnofire。IntheroominthehousenextdoorKateSwifthadnotyetappeared。Withgrimdeterminationthemansatdowntowait。SittinginthechairandgrippingtheedgeofthedeskonwhichlaytheBiblehestaredintothedarknessthinkingtheblackestthoughtsofhislife。Hethoughtofhiswifeandforthemomentalmosthatedher。\"Shehasalwaysbeenashamedofpassionandhascheatedme,\"hethought。\"Manhasarighttoexpectlivingpassionandbeautyinawoman。Hehasnorighttoforgetthatheisanani-

  malandinmethereissomethingthatisGreek。I

  willthrowoffthewomanofmybosomandseekotherwomen。Iwillbesiegethisschoolteacher。I

  willflyinthefaceofallmenandifIamacreatureofcarnallustsIwilllivethenformylusts。\"

  Thedistractedmantrembledfromheadtofoot,partlyfromcold,partlyfromthestruggleinwhichhewasengaged。Hourspassedandafeverassailedhisbody。Histhroatbegantohurtandhisteethchattered。Hisfeetonthestudyfloorfeltliketwocakesofice。Stillhewouldnotgiveup。\"IwillseethiswomanandwillthinkthethoughtsIhaveneverdaredtothink,\"hetoldhimself,grippingtheedgeofthedeskandwaiting。

  CurtisHartmancameneardyingfromtheeffectsofthatnightofwaitinginthechurch,andalsohefoundinthethingthathappenedwhathetooktobethewayoflifeforhim。Onothereveningswhenhehadwaitedhehadnotbeenabletosee,throughthelittleholeintheglass,anypartoftheschoolteacher\'sroomexceptthatoccupiedbyherbed。Inthedarknesshehadwaiteduntilthewomansud-

  denlyappearedsittinginthebedinherwhitenight-

  robe。Whenthelightwasturnedupsheproppedherselfupamongthe\'pillowsandreadabook。

  Sometimesshesmokedoneofthecigarettes。Onlyherbareshouldersandthroatwerevisible。

  OntheJanuarynight,afterhehadcomeneardyingwithcoldandafterhismindhadtwoorthreetimesactuallyslippedawayintoanoddlandoffan-

  tasysothathehadbyanexerciseofwillpowertoforcehimselfbackintoconsciousness,KateSwiftappeared。Intheroomnextdooralampwaslightedandthewaitingmanstaredintoanemptybed。Thenuponthebedbeforehiseyesanakedwomanthrewherself。Lyingfacedownwardsheweptandbeatwithherfistsuponthepillow。Withafinaloutburstofweepingshehalfarose,andinthepresenceofthemanwhohadwaitedtolookandnottothinkthoughtsthewomanofsinbegantopray。Inthelamplightherfigure,slimandstrong,lookedlikethefigureoftheboyinthepresenceoftheChristontheleadedwindow。

  CurtisHartmanneverrememberedhowhegotoutofthechurch。Withacryhearose,draggingtheheavydeskalongthefloor。TheBiblefell,makingagreatclatterinthesilence。Whenthelightinthehousenextdoorwentouthestumbleddownthestairwayandintothestreet。AlongthestreethewentandraninatthedooroftheWinesburgEagle。

  ToGeorgeWillard,whowastrampingupanddownintheofficeundergoingastruggleofhisown,hebegantotalkhalfincoherently。\"ThewaysofGodarebeyondhumanunderstanding,\"hecried,run-

  ninginquicklyandclosingthedoor。Hebegantoadvanceupontheyoungman,hiseyesglowingandhisvoiceringingwithfervor。\"Ihavefoundthelight,\"hecried。\"Aftertenyearsinthistown,Godhasmanifestedhimselftomeinthebodyofawoman。\"Hisvoicedroppedandhebegantowhis-

  per。\"Ididnotunderstand,\"hesaid。\"WhatItooktobeatrialofmysoulwasonlyapreparationforanewandmorebeautifulfervorofthespirit。GodhasappearedtomeinthepersonofKateSwift,theschoolteacher,kneelingnakedonabed。DoyouknowKateSwift?Althoughshemaynotbeawareofit,sheisaninstrumentofGod,bearingthemes-

  sageoftruth。\"

  ReverendCurtisHartmanturnedandranoutoftheoffice。Atthedoorhestopped,andafterlookingupanddownthedesertedstreet,turnedagaintoGeorgeWillard。\"Iamdelivered。Havenofear。\"Heheldupableedingfistfortheyoungmantosee。\"I

  smashedtheglassofthewindow,\"hecried。\"Nowitwillhavetobewhollyreplaced。ThestrengthofGodwasinmeandIbrokeitwithmyfist。\"

  THETEACHER

  SNOWLAYDEEPinthestreetsofWinesburg。Ithadbeguntosnowaboutteno\'clockinthemorningandawindsprangupandblewthesnowincloudsalongMainStreet。Thefrozenmudroadsthatledintotownwerefairlysmoothandinplacesicecov-

  eredthemud。\"Therewillbegoodsleighing,\"saidWillHenderson,standingbythebarinEdGriffith\'ssaloon。OutofthesaloonhewentandmetSylvesterWestthedruggiststumblingalonginthekindofheavyovershoescalledarctics。\"SnowwillbringthepeopleintotownonSaturday,\"saidthedruggist。

  Thetwomenstoppedanddiscussedtheiraffairs。

  WillHenderson,whohadonalightovercoatandnoovershoes,kickedtheheelofhisleftfootwiththetoeoftheright。\"Snowwillbegoodforthewheat,\"observedthedruggistsagely。

  YoungGeorgeWillard,whohadnothingtodo,wasgladbecausehedidnotfeellikeworkingthatday。TheweeklypaperhadbeenprintedandtakentothepostofficeWednesdayeveningandthesnowbegantofallonThursday。Ateighto\'clock,afterthemorningtrainhadpassed,heputapairofskatesinhispocketandwentuptoWaterworksPondbutdidnotgoskating。PastthepondandalongapaththatfollowedWineCreekhewentuntilhecametoagroveofbeechtrees。Therehebuiltafireagainstthesideofalogandsatdownattheendofthelogtothink。Whenthesnowbegantofallandthewindtoblowhehurriedaboutgettingfuelforthefire。

  TheyoungreporterwasthinkingofKateSwift,whohadoncebeenhisschoolteacher。Ontheeve-

  ningbeforehehadgonetoherhousetogetabookshewantedhimtoreadandhadbeenalonewithherforanhour。Forthefourthorfifthtimethewomanhadtalkedtohimwithgreatearnestnessandhecouldnotmakeoutwhatshemeantbyhertalk。Hebegantobelieveshemustbeinlovewithhimandthethoughtwasbothpleasingandannoying。

  Upfromtheloghesprangandbegantopilesticksonthefire。Lookingabouttobesurehewasalonehetalkedaloudpretendinghewasinthepresenceofthewoman,\"Oh,,you\'rejustlettingon,youknowyouare,\"hedeclared。\"Iamgoingtofindoutaboutyou。Youwaitandsee。\"

  Theyoungmangotupandwentbackalongthepathtowardtownleavingthefireblazinginthewood。Ashewentthroughthestreetstheskatesclankedinhispocket。InhisownroomintheNewWillardHousehebuiltafireinthestoveandlaydownontopofthebed。Hebegantohavelustfulthoughtsandpullingdowntheshadeofthewindowclosedhiseyesandturnedhisfacetothewall。Hetookapillowintohisarmsandembraceditthinkingfirstoftheschoolteacher,whobyherwordshadstirredsomethingwithinhim,andlaterofHelenWhite,theslimdaughterofthetownbanker,withwhomhehadbeenforalongtimehalfinlove。

  Bynineo\'clockofthateveningsnowlaydeepinthestreetsandtheweatherhadbecomebittercold。

  Itwasdifficulttowalkabout。Thestoresweredarkandthepeoplehadcrawledawaytotheirhouses。

  TheeveningtrainfromClevelandwasverylatebutnobodywasinterestedinitsarrival。Byteno\'clockallbutfouroftheeighteenhundredcitizensofthetownwereinbed。

  HopHiggins,thenightwatchman,waspartiallyawake。Hewaslameandcarriedaheavystick。Ondarknightshecarriedalantern。Betweennineandteno\'clockhewenthisrounds。UpanddownMainStreethestumbledthroughthedriftstryingthedoorsofthestores。Thenhewentintoalleywaysandtriedthebackdoors。FindingalltighthehurriedaroundthecornertotheNewWillardHouseandbeatonthedoor。Throughtherestofthenightheintendedtostaybythestove。\"Yougotobed。I\'llkeepthestovegoing,\"hesaidtotheboywhosleptonacotinthehoteloffice。

  HopHigginssatdownbythestoveandtookoffhisshoes。Whentheboyhadgonetosleephebegantothinkofhisownaffairs。Heintendedtopainthishouseinthespringandsatbythestovecalculatingthecostofpaintandlabor。Thatledhimintoothercalculations。Thenightwatchmanwassixtyyearsoldandwantedtoretire。HehadbeenasoldierintheCivilWaranddrewasmallpension。Hehopedtofindsomenewmethodofmakingalivingandaspiredtobecomeaprofessionalbreederofferrets。

  Alreadyhehadfourofthestrangelyshapedsavagelittlecreatures,thatareusedbysportsmeninthepursuitofrabbits,inthecellarofhishouse。\"NowIhaveonemaleandthreefemales,\"hemused。\"IfIamluckybyspringIshallhavetwelveorfifteen。

  InanotheryearIshallbeabletobeginadvertisingferretsforsaleinthesportingpapers。\"

  Thenightwatchmansettledintohischairandhismindbecameablank。Hedidnotsleep。Byyearsofpracticehehadtrainedhimselftositforhoursthroughthelongnightsneitherasleepnorawake。

  Inthemorninghewasalmostasrefreshedasthoughhehadslept。

  WithHopHigginssafelystowedawayinthechairbehindthestoveonlythreepeoplewereawakeinWinesburg。GeorgeWillardwasintheofficeoftheEaglepretendingtobeatworkonthewritingofastorybutinrealitycontinuingthemoodofthemorningbythefireinthewood。InthebelltowerofthePresbyterianChurchtheReverendCurtisHartmanwassittinginthedarknesspreparinghim-

  selfforarevelationfromGod,andKateSwift,theschoolteacher,wasleavingherhouseforawalkinthestorm。

  Itwaspastteno\'clockwhenKateSwiftsetoutandthewalkwasunpremeditated。Itwasasthoughthemanandtheboy,bythinkingofher,haddrivenherforthintothewintrystreets。AuntElizabethSwifthadgonetothecountyseatconcerningsomebusinessinconnectionwithmortgagesinwhichshehadmoneyinvestedandwouldnotbebackuntilthenextday。Byahugestove,calledabaseburner,inthelivingroomofthehousesatthedaughterreadingabook。Suddenlyshesprangtoherfeetand,snatchingacloakfromarackbythefrontdoor,ranoutofthehouse。

  AttheageofthirtyKateSwiftwasnotknowninWinesburgasaprettywoman。Hercomplexionwasnotgoodandherfacewascoveredwithblotchesthatindicatedillhealth。Aloneinthenightinthewinterstreetsshewaslovely。Herbackwasstraight,hershoulderssquare,andherfeatureswereasthefeaturesofatinygoddessonapedestalinagardeninthedimlightofasummerevening。

  DuringtheafternoontheschoolteacherhadbeentoseeDoctorWellingconcerningherhealth。Thedoctorhadscoldedherandhaddeclaredshewasindangeroflosingherhearing。ItwasfoolishforKateSwifttobeabroadinthestorm,foolishandperhapsdangerous。

  Thewomaninthestreetsdidnotrememberthewordsofthedoctorandwouldnothaveturnedbackhadsheremembered。Shewasverycoldbutafterwalkingforfiveminutesnolongermindedthecold。

  FirstshewenttotheendofherownstreetandthenacrossapairofhayscalessetinthegroundbeforeafeedbarnandintoTrunionPike。AlongTrunionPikeshewenttoNedWinters\'barnandturningeastfollowedastreetoflowframehousesthatledoverGospelHillandintoSuckerRoadthatrandownashallowvalleypastIkeSmead\'schickenfarmtoWaterworksPond。Asshewentalong,thebold,ex-

  citedmoodthathaddrivenheroutofdoorspassedandthenreturnedagain。

  TherewassomethingbitingandforbiddinginthecharacterofKateSwift。Everyonefeltit。Intheschoolroomshewassilent,cold,andstern,andyetinanoddwayveryclosetoherpupils。Onceinalongwhilesomethingseemedtohavecomeoverherandshewashappy。Allofthechildrenintheschoolroomfelttheeffectofherhappiness。Foratimetheydidnotworkbutsatbackintheirchairsandlookedather。

  Withhandsclaspedbehindherbacktheschoolteacherwalkedupanddownintheschoolroomandtalkedveryrapidly。Itdidnotseemtomatterwhatsubjectcameintohermind。OnceshetalkedtothechildrenofCharlesLambandmadeupstrange,inti-

  matelittlestoriesconcerningthelifeofthedeadwriter。ThestoriesweretoldwiththeairofonewhohadlivedinahousewithCharlesLambandknewallthesecretsofhisprivatelife。Thechildrenweresomewhatconfused,thinkingCharlesLambmustbesomeonewhohadoncelivedinWinesburg。

  Onanotheroccasiontheteachertalkedtothechil-

  drenofBenvenutoCellini。Thattimetheylaughed。

  Whatabragging,blustering,brave,lovablefellowshemadeoftheoldartist!Concerninghimalsosheinventedanecdotes。TherewasoneofaGermanmusicteacherwhohadaroomaboveCellini\'slodg-

  ingsinthecityofMilanthatmadetheboysguffaw。

  SugarsMcNutts,afatboywithredcheeks,laughedsohardthathebecamedizzyandfelloffhisseatandKateSwiftlaughedwithhim。Thensuddenlyshebecameagaincoldandstern。

  Onthewinternightwhenshewalkedthroughthedesertedsnow-coveredstreets,acrisishadcomeintothelifeoftheschoolteacher。AlthoughnooneinWinesburgwouldhavesuspectedit,herlifehadbeenveryadventurous。Itwasstilladventurous。

  Daybydayassheworkedintheschoolroomorwalkedinthestreets,grief,hope,anddesirefoughtwithinher。Behindacoldexteriorthemostextraor-

  dinaryeventstranspiredinhermind。Thepeopleofthetownthoughtofherasaconfirmedoldmaidandbecauseshespokesharplyandwentherownwaythoughtherlackinginallthehumanfeelingthatdidsomuchtomakeandmartheirownlives。

  Inrealityshewasthemosteagerlypassionatesoulamongthem,andmorethanonce,inthefiveyearssinceshehadcomebackfromhertravelstosettleinWinesburgandbecomeaschoolteacher,hadbeencompelledtogooutofthehouseandwalkhalfthroughthenightfightingoutsomebattleragingwithin。OnceonanightwhenitrainedshehadstayedoutsixhoursandwhenshecamehomehadaquarrelwithAuntElizabethSwift。\"Iamgladyou\'renotaman,\"saidthemothersharply。\"MorethanonceI\'vewaitedforyourfathertocomehome,notknowingwhatnewmesshehadgotinto。I\'vehadmyshareofuncertaintyandyoucannotblamemeifIdonotwanttoseetheworstsideofhimreproducedinyou。\"

  KateSwift\'smindwasablazewiththoughtsofGeorgeWillard。Insomethinghehadwrittenasaschoolboyshethoughtshehadrecognizedthesparkofgeniusandwantedtoblowonthespark。

  OnedayinthesummershehadgonetotheEagleofficeandfindingtheboyunoccupiedhadtakenhimoutMainStreettotheFairGround,wherethetwosatonagrassybankandtalked。Theschoolteachertriedtobringhometothemindoftheboysomeconceptionofthedifficultieshewouldhavetofaceasawriter。\"Youwillhavetoknowlife,\"shedeclared,andhervoicetrembledwithearnestness。

  ShetookholdofGeorgeWillard\'sshouldersandturnedhimaboutsothatshecouldlookintohiseyes。Apasser-bymighthavethoughtthemabouttoembrace。\"Ifyouaretobecomeawriteryou\'llhavetostopfoolingwithwords,\"sheexplained。\"Itwouldbebettertogiveupthenotionofwritinguntilyouarebetterprepared。Nowit\'stimetobeliving。Idon\'twanttofrightenyou,butIwouldliketomakeyouunderstandtheimportofwhatyouthinkofattempting。Youmustnotbecomeamerepeddlerofwords。Thethingtolearnistoknowwhatpeoplearethinkingabout,notwhattheysay。\"

  OntheeveningbeforethatstormyThursdaynightwhentheReverendCurtisHartmansatinthebelltowerofthechurchwaitingtolookatherbody,youngWillardhadgonetovisittheteacherandtoborrowabook。Itwasthenthethinghappenedthatconfusedandpuzzledtheboy。Hehadthebookunderhisarmandwaspreparingtodepart。AgainKateSwifttalkedwithgreatearnestness。Nightwascomingonandthelightintheroomgrewdim。Asheturnedtogoshespokehisnamesoftlyandwithanimpulsivemovementtookholdofhishand。Be-

  causethereporterwasrapidlybecomingamansomethingofhisman\'sappeal,combinedwiththewinsomenessoftheboy,stirredtheheartofthelonelywoman。Apassionatedesiretohavehimun-

  derstandtheimportoflife,tolearntointerpretittrulyandhonestly,sweptoverher。Leaningfor-

  ward,herlipsbrushedhischeek。Atthesamemo-

  mentheforthefirsttimebecameawareofthemarkedbeautyofherfeatures。Theywerebothem-

  barrassed,andtorelieveherfeelingshebecameharshanddomineering。\"What\'stheuse?ItwillbetenyearsbeforeyoubegintounderstandwhatI

  meanwhenItalktoyou,\"shecriedpassionately。

  Onthenightofthestormandwhiletheministersatinthechurchwaitingforher,KateSwiftwenttotheofficeoftheWinesburgEagle,intendingtohaveanothertalkwiththeboy。Afterthelongwalkinthesnowshewascold,lonely,andtired。AsshecamethroughMainStreetshesawthefightfromtheprintshopwindowshiningonthesnowandonanimpulseopenedthedoorandwentin。Foranhourshesatbythestoveintheofficetalkingoflife。Shetalkedwithpassionateearnestness。Theimpulsethathaddrivenheroutintothesnowpoureditselfoutintotalk。Shebecameinspiredasshesometimesdidinthepresenceofthechildreninschool。Agreateagernesstoopenthedooroflifetotheboy,whohadbeenherpupilandwhoshethoughtmightpos-

  sessatalentfortheunderstandingoflife,hadpos-

  sessionofher。Sostrongwasherpassionthatitbecamesomethingphysical。Againherhandstookholdofhisshouldersandsheturnedhimabout。Inthedimlighthereyesblazed。Shearoseandlaughed,notsharplyaswascustomarywithher,butinaqueer,hesitatingway。\"Imustbegoing,\"shesaid。\"Inamoment,ifIstay,I\'llbewantingtokissyou。\"

  Inthenewspaperofficeaconfusionarose。KateSwiftturnedandwalkedtothedoor。Shewasateacherbutshewasalsoawoman。AsshelookedatGeorgeWillard,thepassionatedesiretobelovedbyaman,thathadathousandtimesbeforesweptlikeastormoverherbody,tookpossessionofher。

  InthelamplightGeorgeWillardlookednolongeraboy,butamanreadytoplaythepartofaman。

  TheschoolteacherletGeorgeWillardtakeherintohisarms。Inthewarmlittleofficetheairbecamesuddenlyheavyandthestrengthwentoutofherbody。Leaningagainstalowcounterbythedoorshewaited。Whenhecameandputahandonhershoul-

  dersheturnedandletherbodyfallheavilyagainsthim。ForGeorgeWillardtheconfusionwasimmedi-

  atelyincreased。Foramomentheheldthebodyofthewomantightlyagainsthisbodyandthenitstiff-

  ened。Twosharplittlefistsbegantobeatonhisface。

  Whentheschoolteacherhadrunawayandlefthimalone,hewalkedupanddowntheofficeswearingfuriously。

  ItwasintothisconfusionthattheReverendCurtisHartmanprotrudedhimself。WhenhecameinGeorgeWillardthoughtthetownhadgonemad。

  Shakingableedingfistintheair,theministerpro-

  claimedthewomanGeorgehadonlyamomentbe-

  foreheldinhisarmsaninstrumentofGodbearingamessageoftruth。

  Georgeblewoutthelampbythewindowandlockingthedooroftheprintshopwenthome。

  Throughthehoteloffice,pastHopHigginslostinhisdreamoftheraisingofferrets,hewentandupintohisownroom。Thefireinthestovehadgoneoutandheundressedinthecold。Whenhegotintobedthesheetswerelikeblanketsofdrysnow。

  GeorgeWillardrolledaboutinthebedonwhichhadlainintheafternoonhuggingthepillowandthinkingthoughtsofKateSwift。Thewordsoftheminister,whohethoughthadgonesuddenlyin-

  sane,ranginhisears。Hiseyesstaredabouttheroom。Theresentment,naturaltothebaffledmale,passedandhetriedtounderstandwhathadhap-

  pened。Hecouldnotmakeitout。Overandoverheturnedthematterinhismind。Hourspassedandhebegantothinkitmustbetimeforanotherdaytocome。Atfouro\'clockhepulledthecoversupabouthisneckandtriedtosleep。Whenhebecamedrowsyandclosedhiseyes,heraisedahandandwithitgropedaboutinthedarkness。\"Ihavemissedsome-

  thing。IhavemissedsomethingKateSwiftwastry-

  ingtotellme,\"hemutteredsleepily。ThenhesleptandinallWinesburghewasthelastsoulonthatwinternighttogotosleep。

  LONELINESS

  HEWASTHEsonofMrs。AlRobinsonwhoonceownedafarmonasideroadleadingoffTrunionPike,eastofWinesburgandtwomilesbeyondthetownlimits。Thefarmhousewaspaintedbrownandtheblindstoallofthewindowsfacingtheroadwerekeptclosed。Intheroadbeforethehouseaflockofchickens,accompaniedbytwoguineahens,layinthedeepdust。EnochlivedinthehousewithhismotherinthosedaysandwhenhewasayoungboywenttoschoolattheWinesburgHighSchool。Oldcitizensrememberedhimasaquiet,smilingyouthinclinedtosilence。Hewalkedinthemiddleoftheroadwhenhecameintotownandsometimesreadabook。Driversofteamshadtoshoutandsweartomakehimrealizewherehewassothathewouldturnoutofthebeatentrackandletthempass。

  Whenhewastwenty-oneyearsoldEnochwenttoNewYorkCityandwasacitymanforfifteenyears。HestudiedFrenchandwenttoanartschool,hopingtodevelopafacultyhehadfordrawing。InhisownmindheplannedtogotoParisandtofinishhisarteducationamongthemastersthere,butthatneverturnedout。

  NothingeverturnedoutforEnochRobinson。Hecoulddrawwellenoughandhehadmanyodddeli-

  catethoughtshiddenawayinhisbrainthatmighthaveexpressedthemselvesthroughthebrushofapainter,buthewasalwaysachildandthatwasahandicaptohisworldlydevelopment。Henevergrewupandofcoursehecouldn\'tunderstandpeo-

  pleandhecouldn\'tmakepeopleunderstandhim。

  Thechildinhimkeptbumpingagainstthings,againstactualitieslikemoneyandsexandopinions。

  Oncehewashitbyastreetcarandthrownagainstanironpost。Thatmadehimlame。ItwasoneofthemanythingsthatkeptthingsfromturningoutforEnochRobinsonInNewYorkCity,whenhefirstwenttheretoliveandbeforehebecameconfusedanddisconcertedbythefactsoflife,Enochwentaboutagooddealwithyoungmen。Hegotintoagroupofotheryoungartists,bothmenandwomen,andintheeveningstheysometimescametovisithiminhisroom。Oncehegotdrunkandwastakentoapolicestationwhereapolicemagistratefrightenedhimhorribly,andoncehetriedtohaveanaffairwithawomanofthetownmetonthesidewalkbeforehislodginghouse。ThewomanandEnochwalkedtogetherthreeblocksandthentheyoungmangrewafraidandranaway。Thewomanhadbeendrinkingandtheincidentamusedher。Sheleanedagainstthewallofabuildingandlaughedsoheartilythatanothermanstoppedandlaughedwithher。Thetwowentawaytogether,stilllaughing,andEnochcreptofftohisroomtremblingandvexed。

  TheroominwhichyoungRobinsonlivedinNewYorkfacedWashingtonSquareandwaslongandnarrowlikeahallway。Itisimportanttogetthatfixedinyourmind。ThestoryofEnochisinfactthestoryofaroomalmostmorethanitisthestoryofaman。

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