SirWalterreign\'dbeforeme；MooreandCampbellBeforeandafter；butnowgrownmoreholy，TheMusesuponSion\'shillmustrambleWithpoetsalmostclergymen，orwholly；
AndPegasushathapsalmodicambleBeneaththeveryReverendRowleyPowley，Whoshoesthegloriousanimalwithstilts，AmodernAncientPistol-bythehilts？
Thenthere\'smygentleEuphues，who，theysay，Setsupforbeingasortofmoralme；
He\'llfinditratherdifficultsomedayToturnoutboth，oreither，itmaybe。
SomepersonsthinkthatColeridgehaththesway；
AndWordsworthhassupporters，twoorthree；
Andthatdeep-mouth\'dBoeotian\'SavageLandor\'
HastakenforaswanrogueSouthey\'sgander。
JohnKeats，whowaskill\'doffbyonecritique，Justashereallypromisedsomethinggreat，Ifnotintelligible，withoutGreekContrivedtotalkaboutthegodsoflate，Muchastheymighthavebeensupposedtospeak。
Poorfellow！Hiswasanuntowardfate；
\'Tisstrangethemind，thatveryfieryparticle，Shouldletitselfbesnuff\'doutbyanarticle。
ThelistgrowslongofliveanddeadpretendersTothatwhichnonewillgain-ornonewillknowTheconqueroratleast；who，ereTimerendersHislastaward，willhavethelonggrassgrowAbovehisburnt-outbrain，andsaplesscinders。
IfImightaugur，IshouldratebutlowTheirchances；they\'retoonumerous，likethethirtyMocktyrants，whenRome\'sannalswax\'dbutdirty。
Thisistheliterarylowerempire，Wherethepraetorianbandstakeupthematter；-
A\'dreadfultrade，\'likehiswho\'gatherssamphire，\'
Theinsolentsoldierytosootheandflatter，Withthesamefeelingsasyou\'dcoaxavampire。
Now，wereIonceathome，andingoodsatire，I\'dtryconclusionswiththoseJanizaries，Andshowthemwhatanintellectualwaris。
IthinkIknowatrickortwo，wouldturnTheirflanks；-butitishardlyworthmywhileWithsuchsmallgeartogivemyselfconcern：
IndeedI\'venotthenecessarybile；
Mynaturaltemper\'sreallyaughtbutstern，AndevenmyMuse\'sworstreproof\'sasmile；
Andthenshedropsabriefandmoderncurtsy，Andglidesaway，assuredsheneverhurtsye。
MyJuan，whomIleftindeadlyperilAmongstlivepoetsandblueladies，pastWithsomesmallprofitthroughthatfieldsosterile，Beingtiredintime，and，neitherleastnorlast，Leftitbeforehehadbeentreatedveryill；
Andhenceforthfoundhimselfmoregailyclass\'dAmongstthehigherspiritsoftheday，Thesun\'strueson，novapour，butaray。
Hismornshepass\'dinbusiness-which，dissected，WaslikeallbusinessalaboriousnothingThatleadstolassitude，themostinfectedAndCentaurNessusgarbofmortalclothing，Andonoursofasmakesusliedejected，AndtalkintenderhorrorsofourloathingAllkindsoftoil，saveforourcountry\'sgood-
Whichgrowsnobetter，though\'tistimeitshould。
Hisafternoonshepass\'dinvisits，luncheons，Loungingandboxing；andthetwilighthourInridingroundthosevegetablepuncheonsCall\'d\'Parks，\'wherethereisneitherfruitnorflowerEnoughtogratifyabee\'sslightmunchings；
Butafterallitistheonly\'bower\'
InMoore\'sphrase，wherethefashionablefairCanformaslightacquaintancewithfreshair。
Thendress，thendinner，thenawakestheworld！
Thenglarethelamps，thenwhirlthewheels，thenroarThroughstreetandsquarefastflashingchariotshurl\'dLikeharness\'dmeteors；thenalongthefloorChalkmimicspainting；thenfestoonsaretwirl\'d；
Thenrollthebrazenthundersofthedoor，WhichopenstothethousandhappyfewAnearthlyparadiseof\'OrMolu。\'
Therestandsthenoblehostess，norshallsinkWiththethree-thousandthcurtsy；therethewaltz，Theonlydancewhichteachesgirlstothink，Makesoneinloveevenwithitsveryfaults。
Saloon，room，hall，o\'erflowbeyondtheirbrink，Andlongthelatestofarrivalshalts，\'Midstroyaldukesanddamescondemn\'dtoclimb，Andgainaninchofstaircaseatatime。
Thricehappyhewho，afterasurveyOfthegoodcompany，canwinacorner，Adoorthat\'sinorboudoiroutoftheway，Wherehemayfixhimselflikesmall\'JackHorner，\'
AndlettheBabelroundrunasitmay，Andlookonasamourner，orascorner，Oranapprover，oramerespectator，Yawningalittleasthenightgrowslater。
Butthiswon\'tdo，savebyandby；andheWho，likeDonJuan，takesanactiveshare，MuststeerwithcarethroughallthatglitteringseaOfgemsandplumesandpearlsandsilks，towhereHedeemsitishisproperplacetobe；
Dissolvinginthewaltztosomesoftair，OrproudlierprancingwithmercurialskillWhereSciencemarshalsforthherownquadrille。
Or，ifhedancenot，buthathhigherviewsUponanheiressorhisneighbour\'sbride，LethimtakecarethatthatwhichhepursuesIsnotatoncetoopalpablydescried。
FullmanyaneagergentlemanoftruesHishaste：impatienceisablunderingguide，Amongstapeoplefamousforreflection，Wholiketoplaythefoolwithcircumspection。
But，ifyoucancontrive，getnextatsupper；
Or，ifforestalled，getoppositeandogle：-
Oh，yeambrosialmoments！alwaysupperInmind，asortofsentimentalbogle，Whichsitsforeveruponmemory\'scrupper，Theghostofvanish\'dpleasuresonceinvogue！IllCantendersoulsrelatetheriseandfallOfhopesandfearswhichshakeasingleball。
ButtheseprecautionaryhintscantouchOnlythecommonrun，whomustpursue，Andwatch，andward；whoseplansawordtoomuchOrlittleoverturns；andnotthefewOrmanyforthenumber\'ssometimessuch
Whomagoodmien，especiallyifnew，Orfame，orname，forwit，war，sense，ornonsense，Permitswhate\'ertheyplease，ordidnotlongsince。
Ourhero，asahero，youngandhandsome，Noble，rich，celebrated，andastranger，Likeotherslavesofcoursemustpayhisransom，BeforehecanescapefromsomuchdangerAswillenvironaconspicuousman。SomeTalkaboutpoetry，and\'rackandmanger，\'
Andugliness，disease，astoilandtrouble；-
Iwishtheyknewthelifeofayoungnoble。
Theyareyoung，butknownotyouth-itisanticipated；
Handsomebutwasted，richwithoutasou；
Theirvigourinathousandarmsisdissipated；
Theircashcomesfrom，theirwealthgoestoaJew；
BothsenatesseetheirnightlyvotesparticipatedBetweenthetyrant\'sandthetribunes\'crew；
Andhavingvoted，dined，drunk，gamed，andwhored，Thefamilyvaultreceivesanotherlord。
\'Whereistheworld？\'criesYoung，ateighty-\'WhereTheworldinwhichamanwasborn？\'Alas！
Whereistheworldofeightyearspast？\'Twasthere-
Ilookforit-\'tisgone，aglobeofglass！
Crack\'d，shiver\'d，vanish\'d，scarcelygazedon，ereAsilentchangedissolvestheglitteringmass。
Statesmen，chiefs，orators，queens，patriots，kings，Anddandies，allaregoneonthewind\'swings。
WhereisNapoleontheGrand？Godknows。
WherelittleCastlereagh？Thedevilcantell：
WhereGrattan，Curran，Sheridan，allthoseWhoboundthebarorsenateintheirspell？
WhereistheunhappyQueen，withallherwoes？
AndwheretheDaughter，whomtheIsleslovedwell？
Wherearethosemartyr\'dsaintstheFiveperCents？
Andwhere-oh，wherethedevilaretherents？
Where\'sBrummel？Dish\'d。Where\'sLongPoleWellesley？Diddled。
Where\'sWhitbread？Romilly？Where\'sGeorgetheThird？
Whereishiswill？That\'snotsosoonunriddled。
Andwhereis\'Fum\'theFourth，our\'royalbird？\'
Gonedown，itseems，toScotlandtobefiddledUntobySawney\'sviolin，wehaveheard：
\'Cawme，cawthee\'-forsixmonthshathbeenhatchingThissceneofroyalitchandloyalscratching。
WhereisLordThis？AndwheremyLadyThat？
TheHonourableMistressesandMisses？
SomelaidasidelikeanoldOperahat，Married，unmarried，andremarriedthisisAnevolutionoftperformedoflate。
WherearetheDublinshouts-andLondonhisses？
WherearetheGrenvilles？Turn\'dasusual。WhereMyfriendstheWhigs？Exactlywheretheywere。
WherearetheLadyCarolinesandFranceses？
Divorcedordoingthereanent。YeannalsSobrilliant，wherethelistofroutsanddancesis，-
ThouMorningPost，solerecordofthepanelsBrokenincarriages，andallthephantasiesOffashion，-saywhatstreamsnowfillthosechannels？
Somedie，somefly，somelanguishontheContinent，Becausethetimeshavehardlyleftthemonetenant。
Somewhooncesettheircapsatcautiousdukes，Havetakenupatlengthwithyoungerbrothers：
Someheiresseshavebitatsharpers\'hooks：
Somemaidshavebeenmadewives，somemerelymothers；
Othershavelosttheirfreshandfairylooks：
Inshort，thelistofalterationsbothers。
There\'slittlestrangeinthis，butsomethingstrangeisTheunusualquicknessofthesecommonchanges。
Talknotofseventyyearsasage；insevenIhaveseenmorechanges，downfrommonarchstoThehumblestindividualunderheaven，Thanmightsufficeamoderatecenturythrough。
Iknewthatnoughtwaslasting，butnowevenChangegrowstoochangeable，withoutbeingnew：
Nought\'spermanentamongthehumanrace，ExcepttheWhigsnotgettingintoplace。
IhaveseenNapoleon，whoseem\'dquiteaJupiter，ShrinktoaSaturn。IhaveseenaDukeNomatterwhichturnpoliticianstupider，Ifthatcanwellbe，thanhiswoodenlook。
ButitistimethatIshouldhoistmy\'bluePeter，\'
Andsailforanewtheme：-Ihaveseen-andshookToseeit-thekinghiss\'d，andthencaress\'d；
Butdon\'tpretendtosettlewhichwasbest。
IhaveseentheLandholderswithoutarap-
IhaveseenJoannaSouthcote-Ihaveseen-
TheHouseofCommonsturn\'dtoatax-trap-
IhaveseenthatsadaffairofthelateQueen-
Ihaveseencrownsworninsteadofafool\'scap-
IhaveseenaCongressdoingallthat\'smean-
Ihaveseensomenationslikeo\'erloadedassesKickofftheirburthens，meaningthehighclasses。
Ihaveseensmallpoets，andgreatprosers，andInterminable-noteternal-speakers-
Ihaveseenthefundsatwarwithhouseandland-
Ihaveseenthecountrygentlementurnsqueakers-
Ihaveseenthepeopleriddeno\'erlikesandByslavesonhorseback-IhaveseenmaltliquorsExchangedfor\'thinpotations\'byJohnBull-
Ihaveseenjohnhalfdetecthimselfafool-
But\'carpediem，\'Juan，\'carpe，carpe！\'
To-morrowseesanotherraceasgayAndtransient，anddevour\'dbythesameharpy。
\'Life\'sapoorplayer，\'-then\'playouttheplay，Yevillains！\'aboveallkeepasharpeyeMuchlessonwhatyoudothanwhatyousay：
Behypocritical，becautious，beNotwhatyouseem，butalwayswhatyousee。
ButhowshallIrelateinothercantosOfwhatbefellourherointheland，Which\'tisthecommoncryandlietovauntasAmoralcountry？ButIholdmyhand-
ForIdisdaintowriteanAtalantis；
But\'tisaswellatoncetounderstand，Youarenotamoralpeople，andyouknowitWithouttheaidoftoosincereapoet。
WhatJuansawandunderwentshallbeMytopic，withofcoursetheduerestrictionWhichisrequiredbypropercourtesy；
Andrecollecttheworkisonlyfiction，AndthatIsingofneitherminenorme，Thougheveryscribe，insomeslightturnofdiction，Willhintallusionsnevermeant。Ne\'erdoubtThis-whenIspeak，Idon\'thint，butspeakout。
WhetherhemarriedwiththethirdorfourthOffspringofsomesagehusband-huntingcountess，OrwhetherwithsomevirginofmoreworthImeaninFortune\'smatrimonialbounties
HetooktoregularlypeoplingEarth，Ofwhichyourlawfulawfulwedlockfountis，-
Orwhetherhewastakeninfordamages，Forbeingtooexcursiveinhishomages，-
Isyetwithintheunreadeventsoftime。
Thusfar，goforth，thoulay，whichIwillbackAgainstthesamegivenquantityofrhyme，ForbeingasmuchthesubjectofattackAseveryetwasanyworksublime，Bythosewholovetosaythatwhiteisblack。
Somuchthebetter！-Imaystandalone，Butwouldnotchangemyfreethoughtsforathrone。
CANTOTHETWELFTH。
OFallthebarbarousmiddleages，thatWhichismostbarbarousisthemiddleageOfman；itis-Ireallyscarceknowwhat；
Butwhenwehoverbetweenfoolandsage，Anddon\'tknowjustlywhatwewouldbeat-
Aperiodsomethinglikeaprintedpage，Blackletteruponfoolscap，whileourhairGrowsgrizzled，andwearenotwhatwewere；-
Toooldforyouth，-tooyoung，atthirty-five，Toherdwithboys，orhoardwithgoodthreescore，-
Iwonderpeopleshouldbeleftalive；
Butsincetheyare，thatepochisabore：
Lovelingersstill，although\'twerelatetowive；
Andasforotherlove，theillusion\'so\'er；
Andmoney，thatmostpureimagination，Gleamsonlythroughthedawnofitscreation。
OGold！Whycallwemisersmiserable？
Theirsisthepleasurethatcanneverpall；
Theirsisthebestboweranchor，thechaincableWhichholdsfastotherpleasuresgreatandsmall。
Yewhobutseethesavingmanattable，Andscornhistemperateboard，asnoneatall，Andwonderhowthewealthycanbesparing，Knownotwhatvisionsspringfromeachcheese-paring。
Loveorlustmakesmansick，andwinemuchsicker；
Ambitionrends，andgaminggainsaloss；
Butmakingmoney，slowlyfirst，thenquicker，AndaddingstillalittlethrougheachcrossWhichwillcomeoverthings，beatsloveorliquor，Thegamester\'scounter，orthestatesman\'sdross。
OGold！Istillprefertheeuntopaper，Whichmakesbankcreditlikeabankofvapour。
Whoholdthebalanceoftheworld？WhoreignO\'ercongress，whetherroyalistorliberal？
WhorousetheshirtlesspatriotsofSpain？
ThatmakeoldEurope\'sjournalssqueakandgibberall。
Whokeeptheworld，botholdandnew，inpainOrpleasure？Whomakepoliticsrunglibberall？
TheshadeofBuonaparte\'snobledaring？-
JewRothschild，andhisfellow-Christian，Baring。
Those，andthetrulyliberalLafitte，ArethetruelordsofEurope。EveryloanIsnotamerelyspeculativehit，Butseatsanationorupsetsathrone。
Republicsalsogetinvolvedabit；
Columbia\'sstockhathholdersnotunknownOn\'Change；andeventhysilversoil，Peru，MustgetitselfdiscountedbyaJew。
Whycallthemisermiserable？asIsaidbefore：thefrugallifeishis，WhichinasaintorcyniceverwasThethemeofpraise：ahermitwouldnotmissCanonizationfortheself-samecause，Andwhereforeblamegauntwealth\'sausterities？
Because，you\'llsay，noughtcallsforsuchatrial；-
Thenthere\'smoremeritinhisself-denial。
Heisyouronlypoet；-passion，pureAndsparklingonfromheaptoheap，displays，Possess\'d，theore，ofwhichmerehopesallureNationsathwartthedeep：thegoldenraysFlashupiningotsfromthemineobscure；
Onhimthediamondpoursitsbrilliantblaze，Whilethemildemerald\'sbeamshadesdownthediesOfotherstones，tosoothethemiser\'seyes。
Thelandsoneithersidearehis；theshipFromCeylon，Inde，orfarCathay，unloadsForhimthefragrantproduceofeachtrip；
BeneathhiscarsofCeresgroantheroads，AndthevineblusheslikeAurora\'slip；
Hisverycellarsmightbekings\'abodes；
Whilehe，despisingeverysensualcall，Commands-theintellectuallordofall。
Perhapshehathgreatprojectsinhismind，Tobuildacollege，ortofoundarace，Ahospital，achurch，-andleavebehindSomedomesurmountedbyhismeagreface：
PerhapshefainwouldliberatemankindEvenwiththeveryorewhichmakesthembase；
Perhapshewouldbewealthiestofhisnation，Orrevelinthejoysofcalculation。
Butwhetherall，oreach，ornoneoftheseMaybethehoarder\'sprincipleofaction，Thefoolwillcallsuchmaniaadisease：-
Whatishisown？Go-lookateachtransaction，Wars，revels，loves-dothesebringmenmoreeaseThanthemereploddingthrougheach\'vulgarfraction\'？
Ordotheybenefitmankind？Leanmiser！
Letspendthrifts\'heirsenquireofyours-who\'swiser？
Howbeauteousarerouleaus！howcharmingchestsContainingingots，bagsofdollars，coinsNotofoldvictors，allwhoseheadsandcrestsWeighnotthethinorewheretheirvisageshines，Butoffineuncliptgold，wheredullyrestsSomelikeness，whichtheglitteringcirqueconfines，Ofmodern，reigning，sterling，stupidstamp：-
Yes！readymoneyisAladdin\'slamp。
\'Loverulesthecamp，thecourt，thegrove，\'-\'forloveIsheaven，andheavenislove：\'-sosingsthebard；
WhichitwereratherdifficulttoproveAthingwithpoetryingeneralhard。
Perhapstheremaybesomethingin\'thegrove，\'
Atleastitrhymesto\'love；\'butI\'mpreparedTodoubtnolessthanlandlordsoftheirrental
If\'courts\'and\'camps\'bequitesosentimental。
ButifLovedon\'t，Cashdoes，andCashalone：
Cashrulesthegrove，andfellsittoobesides；
Withoutcash，campswerethin，andcourtswerenone；
Withoutcash，Malthustellsyou-\'takenobrides。\'
SoCashrulesLovetheruler，onhisownHighground，asvirginCynthiaswaysthetides：
AndasforHeaven\'HeavenbeingLove，\'whynotsayhoneyIswax？HeavenisnotLove，\'tisMatrimony。
Isnotallloveprohibitedwhatever，Exceptingmarriage？whichislove，nodoubt，Afterasort；butsomehowpeopleneverWiththesamethoughtthetwowordshavehelp\'dout：
Lovemayexistwithmarriage，andshouldever，Andmarriagealsomayexistwithout；
Butlovesansbansisbothasinandshame，Andoughttogobyquiteanothername。
Nowifthe\'court，\'and\'camp，\'and\'grove，\'benotRecruitedallwithconstantmarriedmen，Whonevercovetedtheirneighbour\'slot，Isaythatline\'salapsusofthepen；-
Strangetooinmy\'buoncamerado\'Scott，Socelebratedforhismorals，whenMyJeffreyheldhimupasanexampleTome；-ofwhomthesemoralsareasample。
Well，ifIdon\'tsucceed，Ihavesucceeded，Andthat\'senough；succeededinmyyouth，Theonlytimewhenmuchsuccessisneeded：
AndmysuccessproducedwhatI，insooth，Caredmostabout；itneednotnowbepleaded-
Whate\'eritwas，\'twasmine；I\'vepaid，intruth，Oflatethepenaltyofsuchsuccess，Buthavenotlearn\'dtowishitanyless。
ThatsuitinChancery，-whichsomepersonspleadInanappealtotheunborn，whomthey，Inthefaithoftheirprocreativecreed，Baptizeposterity，orfutureclay，-
TomeseemsbutadubiouskindofreedToleanonforsupportinanyway；
SinceoddsarethatposteritywillknowNomoreofthem，thantheyofher，Itrow。
Why，I\'mposterity-andsoareyou；
Andwhomdoweremember？Notahundred。
Wereeverymemorywrittendownalltrue，Thetenthortwentiethnamewouldbebutblunder\'d；
EvenPlutarch\'sLiveshavebutpick\'doutafew，And\'gainstthosefewyourannalistshavethunder\'d；
AndMitfordinthenineteenthcenturyGives，withGreektruth，thegoodoldGreekthelie。
Goodpeopleall，ofeverydegree，Yegentlereadersandungentlewriters，InthistwelfthCanto\'tismywishtobeAsseriousasifIhadforinditersMalthusandWilberforce：-thelastsetfreeTheNegroesandisworthamillionfighters；
WhileWellingtonhasbutenslavedtheWhites，AndMalthusdoesthething\'gainstwhichhewrites。
I\'mserious-soareallmenuponpaper；
AndwhyshouldInotformmyspeculation，Andholduptothesunmylittletaper？
MankindjustnowseemwraptinmediationOnconstitutionsandsteam-boatsofvapour；
Whilesageswriteagainstallprocreation，UnlessamancancalculatehismeansOffeedingbratsthemomenthiswifeweans。
That\'snoble！That\'sromantic！Formypart，Ithinkthat\'Philo-genitiveness\'isNowhere\'sawordquiteaftermyownheart，Thoughthere\'sashorteragooddealthanthis，Ifthatpolitenesssetitnotapart；
ButI\'mresolvedtosaynoughtthat\'samiss-
Isay，methinksthat\'Philo-genitiveness\'
Mightmeetfrommenalittlemoreforgiveness。
Andnowtobusiness-OmygentleJuan，ThouartinLondon-inthatpleasantplace，Whereeverykindofmischief\'sdailybrewing，Whichcanawaitwarmyouthinitswildrace。
\'Tistrue，thatthycareerisnotanewone；
ThouartnonoviceintheheadlongchaseOfearlylife；butthisisanewland，Whichforeignerscanneverunderstand。
Whatwithasmalldiversityofclimate，Ofhotorcold，mercurialorsedate，IcouldsendforthmymandatelikeaprimateUpontherestofEurope\'ssocialstate；
Butthouartthemostdifficulttorhymeat，GreatBritain，whichtheMusemaypenetrate。
Allcountrieshavetheir\'Lions，\'butintheThereisbutonesuperbmenagerie。
ButIamsickofpolitics。Begin，\'PauloMajora。\'Juan，undecidedAmongstthepathsofbeing\'takenin，\'
Abovetheicehadlikeaskaterglided：
Whentiredofplay，heflirtedwithoutsinWithsomeofthosefaircreatureswhohavepridedThemselvesoninnocenttantalisation，Andhateallviceexceptitsreputation。
Butthesearefew，andintheendtheymakeSomedevilishescapadeorstir，whichshowsThateventhepurestpeoplemaymistakeTheirwaythroughvirtue\'sprimrosepathsofsnows；
Andthenmenstare，asifanewassspakeToBalaam，andfromtonguetoearo\'erflowsQuicksilversmalltalk，endingifyounoteit
Withthekindworld\'samen-\'Whowouldhavethoughtit？\'
ThelittleLeila，withherorienteyes，AndtaciturnAsiaticdispositionWhichsawallwesternthingswithsmallsurprise，Tothesurpriseofpeopleofcondition，WhothinkthatnoveltiesarebutterfliesTobepursuedasfoodforinanition，HercharmingfigureandromantichistoryBecameakindoffashionablemystery。
Thewomenmuchdivided-asisusualAmongstthesexinlittlethingsorgreat。
Thinknot，faircreatures，thatImeantoabuseyouall-
IhavealwayslikedyoubetterthanIstate：
SinceI\'vegrownmoral，stillImustaccuseyouallOfbeingapttotalkatagreatrate；
AndnowtherewasageneralsensationAmongstyou，aboutLeila\'seducation。
Inonepointonlywereyousettled-andYouhadreason；\'twasthatayoungchildofgrace，Asbeautifulasherownnativeland，Andfaraway，thelastbudofherrace，Howe\'erourfriendDonJuanmightcommandHimselfforfive，four，three，ortwoyears\'space，WouldbemuchbettertaughtbeneaththeeyeOfpeeresseswhosefollieshadrundry。
Sofirsttherewasagenerousemulation，Andthentherewasageneralcompetition，Toundertaketheorphan\'seducation。
AsJuanwasapersonofcondition，IthadbeenanaffrontonthisoccasionTotalkofasubscriptionorpetition；
Butsixteendowagers，tenunwedshesages，Whosetalebelongsto\'Hallam\'sMiddleAges，\'
Andoneortwosad，separatewives，withoutAfruittobloomupontheirwitheringbough-
Begg\'dtobringupthelittlegirland\'out，\'-
Forthat\'sthephrasethatsettlesallthingsnow，Meaningavirgin\'sfirstblushatarout，Andallherpointsasthorough-bredtoshow：
AndIassureyou，thatlikevirginhoneyTastestheirfirstseasonmostlyiftheyhavemoney。
Howalltheneedyhonourablemisters，Eachout-at-elbowpeer，ordesperatedandy，Thewatchfulmothers，andthecarefulsistersWho，bytheby，whenclever，aremorehandyAtmakingmatches，where\'\'tisgoldthatglisters，\'
Thantheirherelatives，likeflieso\'ercandyBuzzround\'theFortune\'withtheirbusybattery，Toturnherheadwithwaltzingandwithflattery！
Eachaunt，eachcousin，hathherspeculation；
Nay，marrieddameswillnowandthendiscoverSuchpuredisinterestednessofpassion，I\'veknownthemcourtanheiressfortheirlover。
\'Tantaene！\'Suchthevirtuesofhighstation，EveninthehopefulIsle，whoseoutlet\'s\'Dover！\'
Whilethepoorrichwretch，objectofthesecares，Hascausetowishhersirehadhadmaleheirs。
Somearesoonbagg\'d，andsomerejectthreedozen。
\'TisfinetoseethemscatteringrefusalsAndwilddismayo\'ereveryangrycousinFriendsoftheparty，whobeginaccusals，Suchas-\'UnlessMissBlankmeanttohavechosenPoorFrederick，whydidsheaccordperusalsTohisbillets？Whywaltzwithhim？Why，Ipray，Lookyeslastnight，andyetsaynoto-day？
\'Why？-Why？-Besides，Fredreallywasattach\'d；
\'Twasnotherfortune-hehasenoughwithout：
Thetimewillcomeshe\'llwishthatshehadsnatch\'dSogoodanopportunity，nodoubt：-
Buttheoldmarchionesssomeplanhadhatch\'d，AsI\'lltellAureaatto-morrow\'srout：
AndafterallpoorFrederickmaydobetter-
Praydidyouseeheranswertohisletter？\'
SmartuniformsandsparklingcoronetsArespurn\'dinturn，untilherturnarrives，Aftermalelossoftime，andhearts，andbetsUponthesweepstakesforsubstantialwives；
AndwhenatlasttheprettycreaturegetsSomegentleman，whofights，orwrites，ordrives，ItsoothestheawkwardsquadoftherejectedTofindhowverybadlysheselected。
Forsometimestheyacceptsomelongpursuer，Wornoutwithimportunity；orfallButhereperhapstheinstancesarefewer
Tothelotofhimwhoscarcepursuedatall。
Ahazywidowerturn\'dofforty\'ssureIf\'tisnotvainexamplestorecall
Todrawahighprize：now，howe\'erhegother，I
Seenoughtmorestrangeinthisthant\'otherlottery。
I，formypartone\'moderninstance\'more，\'True，\'tisapity-pity\'tis，\'tistrue\'，Waschosenfromoutanamatoryscore，Albeitmyyearswerelessdiscreetthanfew；
ButthoughIalsohadreform\'dbeforeThosebecameonewhosoonweretobetwo，I\'llnotgainsaythegenerouspublic\'svoice，Thattheyoungladymadeamonstrouschoice。
Oh，pardonmydigression-oratleastPeruse！\'TisalwayswithamoralendThatIdissert，likegracebeforeafeast：
Forlikeanagedaunt，ortiresomefriend，Arigidguardian，orazealouspriest，MyMusebyexhortationmeanstomendAllpeople，atalltimes，andinmostplaces，WhichputsmyPegasustothesegravepaces。
ButnowI\'mgoingtobeimmoral；nowImeantoshowthingsreallyastheyare，Notastheyoughttobe：forIavow，Thattillweseewhat\'swhatinfact，we\'refarFrommuchimprovementwiththatvirtuousploughWhichskimsthesurface，leavingscarceascarUpontheblackloamlongmanuredbyVice，Onlytokeepitscornattheoldprice。
ButfirstoflittleLeilawe\'lldispose；
Forlikeaday-dawnshewasyoungandpure，Orliketheoldcomparisonofsnows，Whicharemorepurethanpleasanttobesure。
Likemanypeopleeverybodyknows，DonJuanwasdelightedtosecureAgoodlyguardianforhisinfantcharge，Whomightnotprofitmuchbybeingatlarge。
Besides，hehadfoundouthewasnotutorIwishthatotherswouldfindoutthesame；
Andratherwish\'dinsuchthingstostandneuter，Forsillywardswillbringtheirguardiansblame：
SowhenhesaweachancientdameasuitorTomakehislittlewildAsiatictame，Consulting\'theSocietyforViceSuppression，\'LadyPinchbeckwashischoice。
Oldenshewas-buthadbeenveryyoung；
Virtuousshewas-andhadbeen，Ibelieve；
AlthoughtheworldhassuchaneviltongueThat-butmychasterearwillnotreceiveAnechoofasyllablethat\'swrong：
Infact，there\'snothingmakesmesomuchgrieve，Asthatabominabletittle-tattle，Whichisthecudeschew\'dbyhumancattle。
MoreoverI\'veremark\'dandIwasonceAslightobserverinamodestway，Andsomayeveryoneexceptadunce，Thatladiesintheiryouthalittlegay，Besidestheirknowledgeoftheworld，andsenseOfthesadconsequenceofgoingastray，Arewiserintheirwarnings\'gainstthewoeWhichthemerepassionlesscanneverknow。
WhiletheharshprudeindemnifieshervirtueByrailingattheunknownandenviedpassion，Seekingfarlesstosaveyouthantohurtyou，Or，what\'sstillworse，toputyououtoffashion，-
Thekinderveteranwithcalmwordswillcourtyou，Entreatingyoutopausebeforeyoudashon；
ExpoundingandillustratingtheriddleOfepicLove\'sbeginning，end，andmiddle。
Nowwhetheritbethus，orthattheyarestricter，Asbetterknowingwhytheyshouldbeso，Ithinkyou\'llfindfrommanyafamilypicture，ThatdaughtersofsuchmothersasmayknowTheworldbyexperienceratherthanbylecture，TurnoutmuchbetterfortheSmithfieldShowOfvestalsbroughtintothemarriagemart，Thanthosebredupbyprudeswithoutaheart。
IsaidthatLadyPinchbeckhadbeentalk\'dabout-
Aswhohasnot，iffemale，young，andpretty？
ButnownomoretheghostofScandalstalk\'dabout；
Shemerelywasdeem\'damiableandwitty，Andseveralofherbestbon-motswerehawk\'dabout：
Thenshewasgiventocharityandpity，Andpass\'datleastthelatteryearsoflife
Forbeingamostexemplarywife。
Highinhighcircles，gentleinherown，Shewasthemildreproveroftheyoung，Whenever-whichmeanseveryday-they\'dshownAnawkwardinclinationtogowrong。
Thequantityofgoodshedid\'sunknown，Orattheleastwouldlengthenoutmysong：
Inbrief，thelittleorphanoftheEastHadraisedaninterestinher，whichincreased。
Juan，too，wasasortoffavouritewithher，Becauseshethoughthimagoodheartatbottom，Alittlespoil\'d，butnotsoaltogether；
Whichwasawonder，ifyouthinkwhogothim，Andhowhehadbeentoss\'d，hescarceknewwhither：
Thoughthismightruinothers，itdidnothim，Atleastentirely-forhehadseentoomanyChangesinyouth，tobesurprisedatany。
Andthesevicissitudestellbestinyouth；
Forwhentheyhappenatariperage，PeopleareapttoblametheFates，forsooth，AndwonderProvidenceisnotmoresage。
Adversityisthefirstpathtotruth：
Hewhohathprovedwar，storm，orwoman\'srage，Whetherhiswintersbeeighteenoreighty，Hathwontheexperiencewhichisdeem\'dsoweighty。
Howfaritprofitsisanothermatter-
OurherogladlysawhislittlechargeSafewithalady，whoselastgrown-updaughterBeinglongmarried，andthussetatlarge，HadleftalltheaccomplishmentsshetaughtherTobetransmitted，liketheLordMayor\'sbarge，Tothenextcomer；or-asitwilltellMoreMuse-like-liketoCytherea\'sshell。
Icallsuchthingstransmission；forthereisAfloatingbalanceofaccomplishmentWhichformsapedigreefromMisstoMiss，Accordingastheirmindsorbacksarebent。
Somewaltz；somedraw；somefathomtheabyssOfmetaphysics；othersarecontentWithmusic；themostmoderateshineaswits；
Whileothershaveageniusturn\'dforfits。
Butwhetherfits，orwits，orharpsichords，Theology，finearts，orfinerstays，MaybethebaitsforgentlemenorlordsWithregulardescent，intheseourdays，Thelastyeartothenewtransfersitshoards；
Newvestalsclaimmen\'seyeswiththesamepraiseOf\'elegant\'etcaetera，infreshbatches-
Allmatchlesscreatures，andyetbentonmatches。
ButnowIwillbeginmypoem。\'TisPerhapsalittlestrange，ifnotquitenew，ThatfromthefirstofCantosuptothisI\'venotbegunwhatwehavetogothrough。
Thesefirsttwelvebooksaremerelyflourishes，Preludios，tryingjustastringortwoUponmylyre，ormakingthepegssure；
Andwhenso，youshallhavetheoverture。
MyMusesdonotcareapinchofrosinAboutwhat\'scall\'dsuccess，ornotsucceeding：
Suchthoughtsarequitebelowthestraintheyhavechosen；
\'Tisa\'greatmorallesson\'theyarereading。
Ithought，atsettingoff，abouttwodozenCantoswoulddo；butatApollo\'spleading，IfthatmyPegasusshouldnotbefounder\'d，Ithinktocantergentlythroughahundred。
DonJuansawthatmicrocosmonstilts，YclepttheGreatWorld；foritistheleast，Althoughthehighest：butasswordshavehiltsBywhichtheirpowerofmischiefisincreased，Whenmaninbattleorinquarreltilts，Thusthelowworld，north，south，orwest，oreast，Muststillobeythehigh-whichistheirhandle，Theirmoon，theirsun，theirgas，theirfarthingcandle。
Hehadmanyfriendswhohadmanywives，andwasWelllook\'duponbyboth，tothatextentOffriendshipwhichyoumayacceptorpass，ItdoesnorgoodnorharmbeingmerelymeantTokeepthewheelsgoingofthehigherclass，Anddrawthemnightlywhenaticket\'ssent：
Andwhatwithmasquerades，andfetes，andballs，Forthefirstseasonsuchalifescarcepalls。
Ayoungunmarriedman，withagoodnameAndfortune，hasanawkwardparttoplay；
Forgoodsocietyisbutagame，\'TheroyalgameofGoose，\'asImaysay，Whereeverybodyhassomeseparateaim，Anendtoanswer，oraplantolay-
Thesingleladieswishingtobedouble，Themarriedonestosavethevirginstrouble。
Idon\'tmeanthisasgeneral，butparticularExamplesmaybefoundofsuchpursuits：
ThoughseveralalsokeeptheirperpendicularLikepoplars，withgoodprinciplesforroots；
Yetmanyhaveamethodmorereticular-
\'Fishersformen，\'likesirenswithsoftlutes：
Fortalksixtimeswiththesamesinglelady，Andyoumaygettheweddingdressesready。
Perhapsyou\'llhavealetterfromthemother，Tosayherdaughter\'sfeelingsaretrepann\'d；
Perhapsyou\'llhaveavisitfromthebrother，Allstrut，andstays，andwhiskers，todemandWhat\'yourintentionsare？\'-OnewayorotherItseemsthevirgin\'sheartexpectsyourhand：
Andbetweenpityforhercaseandyours，You\'lladdtoMatrimony\'slistofcures。
I\'veknownadozenweddingsmadeeventhus，Andsomeofthemhighnames：IhavealsoknownYoungmenwho-thoughtheyhatedtodiscussPretensionswhichtheyneverdream\'dtohaveshown-
Yetneitherfrighten\'dbyafemalefuss，Norbymustachiosmoved，wereletalone，Andlived，asdidthebroken-heartedfair，Inhappierplightthaniftheyform\'dapair。
There\'salsonightly，totheuninitiated，Aperil-notindeedlikeloveormarriage，Butnotthelessforthistobedepreciated：
Itis-ImeantandmeannottodisparageTheshowofvirtueeveninthevitiated-
Itaddsanoutwardgraceuntotheircarriage-
Buttodenouncetheamphibioussortofharlot，\'Couleurderose，\'who\'sneitherwhitenorscarlet。
Suchisyourcoldcoquette，whocan\'tsay\'No，\'
Andwon\'tsay\'Yes，\'andkeepsyouonandoff-ingOnalee-shore，tillitbeginstoblow-
Thenseesyourheartwreck\'d，withaninwardscoffing。
Thisworksaworldofsentimentalwoe，AndsendsnewWertersyearlytotheircoffin；
Butyetismerelyinnocentflirtation，Notquiteadultery，butadulteration。
\'Yegods，Igrowatalker！\'Letusprate。
Thenextofperils，thoughIplaceitsternest，Iswhen，withoutregardto\'churchorstate，\'
Awifemakesortakesloveinuprightearnest。
Abroad，suchthingsdecidefewwomen\'sfate-
Such，earlytraveller！isthetruththoulearnest-
ButinoldEngland，whenayoungbrideerrs，Poorthing！Eve\'swasatriflingcasetohers。
For\'tisalow，newspaper，humdrum，lawsuitCountry，whereayoungcoupleofthesameagesCan\'tformafriendship，buttheworldo\'erawesit。
Averdict-grievousfoetothosewhocauseit！-
Formsasadclimaxtoromantichomages；
Besidesthosesoothingspeechesofthepleaders，Andevidenceswhichregaleallreaders。
Buttheywhoblunderthusarerawbeginners；
AlittlegenialsprinklingofhypocrisyHassavedthefameofthousandsplendidsinners，Theloveliestoligarchsofourgynocracy；
Youmayseesuchatalltheballsanddinners，Amongtheproudestofouraristocracy，Sogentle，charming，charitable，chaste-
Andallbyhavingtactaswellastaste。
Juan，whodidnotstandinthepredicamentOfamerenovice，hadonesafeguardmore；
Forhewassick-no，\'twasnotthewordsickImeant-
Buthehadseensomuchlovebefore，Thathewasnotinheartsoveryweak；-ImeantButthusmuch，andnosneeragainsttheshoreOfwhitecliffs，whitenecks，blueeyes，bluerstockings，Tithes，taxes，duns，anddoorswithdoubleknockings。
Butcomingyoungfromlandsandscenesromantic，Wherelives，notlawsuits，mustberisk\'dforPassion，AndPassion\'sselfmusthaveaspiceoffrantic，Intoacountrywhere\'tishalfafashion，Seem\'dtohimhalfcommercial，halfpedantic，Howe\'erhemightesteemthismoralnation：
Besidesalas！histaste-forgiveandpity！
Atfirsthedidnotthinkthewomenpretty。
Isayatfirst-forhefoundoutatlast，Butbydegrees，thattheywerefairerfarThanthemoreglowingdameswhoselotiscastBeneaththeinfluenceoftheeasternstar。
Afurtherproofweshouldnotjudgeinhaste；
YetinexperiencecouldnotbehisbarTotaste：-thetruthis，ifmenwouldconfess，Thatnoveltiespleaselessthantheyimpress。
Thoughtravell\'d，IhaveneverhadthelucktoTraceupthoseshufflingnegroes，NileorNiger，Tothatimpracticableplace，Timbuctoo，WhereGeographyfindsnoonetoobligeherWithsuchachartasmaybesafelystuckto-
ForEuropeploughsinAfriclike\'bospiger：\'
ButifIhadbeenatTimbuctoo，thereNodoubtIshouldbetoldthatblackisfair。
Itis。Iwillnotswearthatblackiswhite；
ButIsuspectinfactthatwhiteisblack，Andthewholematterrestsuponeyesight。
Askablindman，thebestjudge。You\'llattackPerhapsthisnewposition-butI\'mright；
OrifI\'mwrong，I\'llnotbeta\'enaback：-
Hehathnomornnornight，butallisdarkWithin；andwhatseestthou？Adubiousspark。
ButI\'mrelapsingintometaphysics，Thatlabyrinth，whoseclueisofthesameConstructionasyourcuresforhecticphthisics，Thosebrightmothsflutteringroundadyingflame；
Andthisreflectionbringsmetoplainphysics，Andtothebeautiesofaforeigndame，Comparedwiththoseofourpurepearlsofprice，Thosepolarsummers，allsun，andsomeice。
Orsaytheyarelikevirtuousmermaids，whoseBeginningsarefairfaces，endsmerefishes；-
Notthatthere\'snotaquantityofthoseWhohaveaduerespectfortheirownwishes。
LikeRussiansrushingfromhotbathstosnowsArethey，atbottomvirtuousevenwhenvicious：
Theywarmintoascrape，butkeepofcourse，Asareserve，aplungeintoremorse。
Butthishasnoughttodowiththeiroutsides。
IsaidthatJuandidnotthinkthemprettyAtthefirstblush；forafairBritonhidesHalfherattractions-probablyfrompity-
Andrathercalmlyintotheheartglides，Thanstormsitasafoewouldtakeacity；
Butoncethereifyoudoubtthis，pritheetry
Shekeepsitforyoulikeatrueally。
ShecannotstepasdoesanArabbarb，OrAndalusiangirlfrommassreturning，NorwearasgracefullyasGaulshergarb，NorinhereyeAusonia\'sglanceisburning；
Hervoice，thoughsweet，isnotsofittowarb-
lethosebravuraswhichIstillamlearningTolike，thoughIhavebeensevenyearsinItaly，Andhave，orhad，anearthatservedmeprettily；-
Shecannotdothesethings，noroneortwoOthers，inthatoff-handanddashingstyleWhichtakessomuch-togivethedevilhisdue；
Norisshequitesoreadywithhersmile，NorsettlesallthingsinoneinterviewAthingapprovedassavingtimeandtoil；-
Butthoughthesoilmaygiveyoutimeandtrouble，Wellcultivated，itwillrenderdouble。
Andifinfactshetakestoa\'grandepassion，\'
Itisaveryseriousthingindeed：
Ninetimesinten\'tisbutcapriceorfashion，Coquetry，orawishtotakethelead，Theprideofamerechildwithanewsashon，Orwishtomakearival\'sbosombleed：
Butthetenthinstancewillbeatornado，Forthere\'snosayingwhattheywillormaydo。
Thereason\'sobvious；ifthere\'saneclat，Theylosetheircasteatonce，asdotheParias；
AndwhenthedelicaciesofthelawHavefill\'dtheirpaperswiththeircommentsvarious，Society，thatchinawithoutflawThehypocrite！，willbanishthemlikeMarius，Tositamidsttheruinsoftheirguilt：
ForFame\'saCarthagenotsosoonrebuilt。
Perhapsthisisasitshouldbe；-itisAcommentontheGospel\'s\'Sinnomore，Andbethysinsforgiven：\'-butuponthisIleavethesaintstosettletheirownscore。
Abroad，thoughdoubtlesstheydomuchamiss，AnerringwomanfindsanopenerdoorForherreturntoVirtue-astheycalThatlady，whoshouldbeathometoall。
Forme，IleavethematterwhereIfindit，KnowingthatsuchuneasyvirtueleadsPeoplesometentimeslessinfacttomindit，Andcarebutfordiscoveriesandnotdeeds。
Andasforchastity，you\'llneverbinditByallthelawsthestrictestlawyerpleads，Butaggravatethecrimeyouhavenotprevented，Byrenderingdesperatethosewhohadelserepented。
ButJuanwasnocasuist，norhadponder\'dUponthemorallessonsofmankind：
Besides，hehadnotseenofseveralhundredAladyaltogethertohismind。
Alittle\'blase\'-\'tisnottobewonder\'dAt，thathishearthadgotatougherrind：
Andthoughnotvainerfromhispastsuccess，Nodoubthissensibilitieswereless。
Healsohadbeenbusyseeingsights-
TheParliamentandalltheotherhouses；
Hadsatbeneaththegalleryatnights，Toheardebateswhosethunderrousednotrouses
TheworldtogazeuponthosenorthernlightsWhichflash\'dasfaraswherethemusk-bullbrowses；
Hehadalsostoodattimesbehindthethrone-
ButGreywasnotarrived，andChathamgone。
Hesaw，however，attheclosingsession，Thatnoblesight，whenreallyfreethenation，AkinginconstitutionalpossessionOfsuchathroneasistheproudeststation，Thoughdespotsknowitnot-tilltheprogressionOffreedomshallcompletetheireducation。
\'TisnotmeresplendourmakestheshowaugustToeyeorheart-itisthepeople\'strust。
There，too，hesawwhate\'erhemaybenow
APrince，theprinceofprincesatthetime，Withfascinationinhisverybow，Andfullofpromise，asthespringofprime。
Thoughroyaltywaswrittenonhisbrow，Hehadthenthegrace，too，rareineveryclime，Ofbeing，withoutalloyoffoporbeau，Afinish\'dgentlemanfromtoptotoe。
AndJuanwasreceived，ashathbeensaid，Intothebestsociety：andthereOccurr\'dwhatoftenhappens，I\'mafraid，Howeverdisciplinedanddebonnaire：-
Thetalentandgoodhumourhedisplay\'d，Besidesthemark\'ddistinctionofhisair，Exposedhim，aswasnatural，totemptation，Eventhoughhimselfavoidedtheoccasion。
Butwhat，andwhere，withwhom，andwhen，andwhy，Isnottobeputhastilytogether；
AndasmyobjectismoralityWhateverpeoplesay，Idon\'tknowwhetherI\'llleaveasinglereader\'seyeliddry，Butharrowuphisfeelingstilltheywither，Andhewoutahugemonumentofpathos，AsPhilip\'ssonproposedtodowithAthos。
HerethetwelfthCantoofourintroductionEnds。Whenthebodyofthebook\'sbegun，You\'llfinditofadifferentconstructionFromwhatsomepeoplesay\'twillbewhendone：
Theplanatpresent\'ssimplyinconcoction，Ican\'tobligeyou，reader，toreadon；
That\'syouraffair，notmine：arealspiritShouldneithercourtneglect，nordreadtobearit。
Andifmythunderboltnotalwaysrattles，Remember，reader！youhavehadbeforeTheworstoftempestsandthebestofbattlesThate\'erwerebrew\'dfromelementsorgore，Besidesthemostsublimeof-Heavenknowswhatelse：
Anusurercouldscarceexpectmuchmore-
Butmybestcanto，saveoneonastronomy，Willturnupon\'politicaleconomy。\'
Thatisyourpresentthemeforpopularity：
Nowthatthepublichedgehathscarceastake，Itgrowsanactofpatrioticcharity，Toshowthepeoplethebestwaytobreak。
MyplanbutI，ifbutforsingularity，Reserveitwillbeverysuretotake。
Meantime，readallthenationaldebt-sinkers，Andtellmewhatyouthinkofyourgreatthinkers。
CANTOTHETHIRTEENTH。
INOWmeantobeserious；-itistime，Sincelaughternow-a-daysisdeem\'dtooserious。
AjestatVicebyVirtue\'scall\'dacrime，Andcriticallyheldasdeleterious：
Besides，thesad\'sasourceofthesublime，Althoughwhenlongalittleapttowearyus；
Andthereforeshallmylaysoarhighandsolemn，Asanoldtempledwindledtoacolumn。
TheLadyAdelineAmundeville\'TisanoldNormanname，andtobefoundInpedigrees，bythosewhowanderstillAlongthelastfieldsofthatGothicground
Washigh-born，wealthybyherfather\'swill，Andbeauteous，evenwherebeautiesmostabound，InBritain-whichofcoursetruepatriotsfindThegoodliestsoilofbodyandofmind。
I\'llnotgainsaythem；itisnotmycue；
I\'llleavethemtotheirtaste，nodoubtthebest：
Aneye\'saneye，andwhetherblackorblue，Isnogreatmatter，so\'tisinrequest，\'Tisnonsensetodisputeaboutahue-
Thekindestmaybetakenasatest。
Thefairsexshouldbealwaysfair；andnoman，Tillthirty，shouldperceivethere\'saplainwoman。
AndafterthatsereneandsomewhatdullEpoch，thatawkwardcornerturn\'dfordaysMorequiet，whenourmoon\'snomoreatfull，Wemaypresumetocriticiseorpraise；
BecauseindifferencebeginstolullOurpassions，andwewalkinwisdom\'sways；
AlsobecausethefigureandthefaceHint，that\'tistimetogivetheyoungerplace。
Iknowthatsomewouldfainpostponethisera，ReluctantasallplacementoresignTheirpost；buttheirsismerelyachimera，Fortheyhavepass\'dlife\'sequinoctialline：
ButthentheyhavetheirclaretandMadeiraToirrigatethedrynessofdecline；
Andcountymeetings，andtheparliament，Anddebt，andwhatnot，fortheirsolacesent。
Andistherenotreligion，andreform，Peace，war，thetaxes，andwhat\'scall\'dthe\'Nation\'？
Thestruggletobepilotsinastorm？
Thelandedandthemoniedspeculation？
Thejoysofmutualhatetokeepthemwarm，Insteadoflove，thatmerehallucination？
Nowhatredisbyfarthelongestpleasure；
Menloveinhaste，buttheydetestatleisure。
RoughJohnson，thegreatmoralist，profess\'d，Righthonestly，\'helikedanhonesthater！\'-
TheonlytruththatyethasbeenconfestWithintheselatestthousandyearsorlater。
Perhapsthefineoldfellowspokeinjest：-
Formypart，Iambutamerespectator，Andgazewhere\'erthepalaceorthehovelis，MuchinthemodeofGoethe\'sMephistopheles；
Butneitherlovenorhateinmuchexcess；
Though\'twasnotonceso。IfIsneersometimes，ItisbecauseIcannotwelldoless，Andnowandthenitalsosuitsmyrhymes。