\'Mightyoubeacquainted，learnedgovernor，\'saidRiderhood，\'withapersonofaboutyourownheighthandbreadth，andwot\'udpulldowninascaleaboutyourownweight，answeringtoanamesoundingsummatlikeTotherest?\'
Withadesperationinhimthatmadehimperfectlyquiet，thoughhisjawwasheavilysquared；withhiseyesuponRiderhood；andwithtracesofquickenedbreathinginhisnostrils；theschoolmasterreplied，inasuppressedvoice，afterapause:\'IthinkIknowthemanyoumean。\'
\'IthoughtyouknowedthemanImean，learnedgovernor。Iwanttheman。\'
Withahalfglancearoundhimathispupils，Bradleyreturned:
\'Doyousupposeheishere?\'
\'Beggingyourpardon，learnedgovernor，andbyyourleave，\'saidRiderhood，withalaugh，\'howcouldIsupposehe\'shere，whenthere\'snobodyherebutyou，andme，andtheseyounglambswotyou\'realearningon?Butheismostexcellentcompany，thatman，andIwanthimtocomeandseemeatmyLock，uptheriver。\'
\'I\'lltellhimso。\'
\'D\'yethinkhe\'llcome?\'askedRiderhood。
\'Iamsurehewill。\'
\'Havinggotyourwordforhim，\'saidRiderhood，\'Ishallcountuponhim。P\'rapsyou\'dsofurobleegeme，learnedgovernor，astellhimthatifhedon\'tcomeprecioussoon，I\'lllookhimup。\'
\'Heshallknowit。\'
\'Thankee。AsIsaysawhileago，\'pursuedRiderhood，changinghishoarsetoneandleeringroundupontheclassagain，\'thoughnotalearnedcharactermyownself，Idoadmirelearninginothers，tobesure！Beinghereandhavingmetwithyourkindattention，Master，mightI，aforeIgo，askaquestionofthesehereyounglambsofyourn?\'
\'Ifitisinthewayofschool，\'saidBradley，alwayssustaininghisdarklookattheother，andspeakinginhissuppressedvoice，\'youmay。\'
\'Oh！It\'sinthewayofschool！\'criedRiderhood。\'I\'llpoundit，Master，tobeinthewayofschool。Wot\'sthediwisionsofwater，mylambs?Wotsortsofwateristhereontheland?\'
Shrillchorus:\'Seas，rivers，lakes，andponds。\'
\'Seas，rivers，lakes，andponds，\'saidRiderhood。\'They\'vegotallthelot，Master！BlowedifIshouldn\'thaveleftoutlakes，neverhavingclappedeyesuponone，tomyknowledge。Seas，rivers，lakes，andponds。Wotisit，lambs，astheyketchesinseas，rivers，lakes，andponds?\'
Shrillchoruswithsomecontemptfortheeaseofthequestion:
\'Fish！\'
\'Gooda-gin！\'saidRiderhood。\'Butwotelseisit，mylambs，astheysometimesketchesinrivers?\'
Chorusataloss。Oneshrillvoice:\'Weed！\'
\'Goodagin！\'criedRiderhood。\'Butitain\'tweedneither。You\'llneverguess，mydears。Wotisit，besidesfish，astheysometimesketchesinrivers?Well！I\'lltellyou。It\'ssuitso\'clothes。\'
Bradley\'sfacechanged。
\'Leastways，lambs，\'saidRiderhood，observinghimoutofthecornersofhiseyes，\'that\'swotImyownselfsometimesketchesinrivers。Forstrikemeblind，mylambs，ifIdidn\'tketchinariverthewerybundleundermyarm！\'
Theclasslookedatthemaster，asifappealingfromtheirregularentrapmentofthismodeofexamination。Themasterlookedattheexaminer，asifhewouldhavetornhimtopieces。
\'Iaskyourpardon，learnedgovernor，\'saidRiderhood，smearinghissleeveacrosshismouthashelaughedwitharelish，\'tain\'tfairtothelambs，Iknow。Itwosabitoffunofmine。ButuponmysoulI
drawedthisherebundleoutofariver！It\'saBargeman\'ssuitofclothes。Yousee，ithadbeensunktherebythemanasworeit，andIgotitup。\'
\'Howdoyouknowitwassunkbythemanwhoworeit?\'askedBradley。
\'CauseIseehimdoit，\'saidRiderhood。
Theylookedateachother。Bradley，slowlywithdrawinghiseyes，turnedhisfacetotheblackboardandslowlywipedhisnameout。
\'Aheapofthanks，Master，\'saidRiderhood，\'forbestowingsomuchofyourtime，andofthelambses\'time，uponamanashasn\'tgotnootherrecommendationtoyouthanbeingahonestman。WishingtoseeatmyLockuptheriver，thepersonaswe\'vespokeof，andasyou\'veansweredfor，Itakesmyleaveofthelambsandoftheirlearnedgovernorboth。\'
Withthosewords，heslouchedoutoftheschool，leavingthemastertogetthroughhiswearyworkashemight，andleavingthewhisperingpupilstoobservethemaster\'sfaceuntilhefellintothefitwhichhadbeenlongimpending。
ThenextdaybutonewasSaturday，andaholiday。Bradleyroseearly，andsetoutonfootforPlashwaterWeirMillLock。Herosesoearlythatitwasnotyetlightwhenhebeganhisjourney。Beforeextinguishingthecandlebywhichhehaddressedhimself，hemadealittleparcelofhisdecentsilverwatchanditsdecentguard，andwroteinsidethepaper:\'Kindlytakecareoftheseforme。\'HethenaddressedtheparceltoMissPeecher，andleftitonthemostprotectedcornerofthelittleseatinherlittleporch。
Itwasacoldhardeasterlymorningwhenhelatchedthegardengateandturnedaway。ThelightsnowfallwhichhadfeatheredhisschoolroomwindowsontheThursday，stilllingeredintheair，andwasfallingwhite，whilethewindblewblack。Thetardydaydidnotappearuntilhehadbeenonfoottwohours，andhadtraversedagreaterpartofLondonfromeasttowest。Suchbreakfastashehad，hetookatthecomfortlesspublic-housewherehehadpartedfromRiderhoodontheoccasionoftheirnight-walk。Hetookit，standingatthelitteredbar，andlookedloweringlyatamanwhostoodwhereRiderhoodhadstoodthatearlymorning。
Heoutwalkedtheshortday，andwasonthetowing-pathbytheriver，somewhatfootsore，whenthenightclosedin。StilltwoorthreemilesshortoftheLock，heslackenedhispacethen，butwentsteadilyon。Thegroundwasnowcoveredwithsnow，thoughthinly，andtherewerefloatinglumpsoficeinthemoreexposedpartsoftheriver，andbrokensheetsoficeundertheshelterofthebanks。Hetookheedofnothingbuttheice，thesnow，andthedistance，untilhesawalightahead，whichheknewgleamedfromtheLockHousewindow。Itarrestedhissteps，andhelookedallaround。Theice，andthesnow，andhe，andtheonelight，hadabsolutepossessionofthedrearyscene。Inthedistancebeforehim，laytheplacewherehehadstrucktheworsethanuselessblowsthatmockedhimwithLizzie\'spresencethereasEugene\'swife。Inthedistancebehindhim，laytheplacewherethechildrenwithpointingarmshadseemedtodevotehimtothedemonsincryingouthisname。Withinthere，wherethelightwas，wasthemanwhoastobothdistancescouldgivehimuptoruin。Totheselimitshadhisworldshrunk。
Hemendedhispace，keepinghiseyesuponthelightwithastrangeintensity，asifheweretakingaimatit。Whenheapproacheditsonearlyasthatitpartedintorays，theyseemedtofastenthemselvestohimanddrawhimon。Whenhestruckthedoorwithhishand，hisfootfollowedsoquicklyonhishand，thathewasintheroombeforehewasbiddentoenter。
Thelightwasthejointproductofafireandacandle。Betweenthetwo，withhisfeetontheironfender，satRiderhood，pipeinmouth。
Helookedupwithasurlynodwhenhisvisitorcamein。Hisvisitorlookeddownwithasurlynod。Hisouterclothingremoved，thevisitorthentookaseatontheoppositesideofthefire。
\'Notasmoker，Ithink?\'saidRiderhood，pushingabottletohimacrossthetable。
\'No。\'
Theybothlapsedintosilence，withtheireyesuponthefire。
\'Youdon\'tneedtobetoldIamhere，\'saidBradleyatlength。\'Whoistobegin?\'
\'I\'llbegin，\'saidRiderhood，\'whenI\'vesmokedthisherepipeout。\'
Hefinisheditwithgreatdeliberation，knockedouttheashesonthehob，andputitby。
\'I\'llbegin，\'hethenrepeated，\'BradleyHeadstone，Master，ifyouwishit。\'
\'Wishit?Iwishtoknowwhatyouwantwithme。\'
\'Andsoyoushall。\'Riderhoodhadlookedhardathishandsandhispockets，apparentlyasaprecautionarymeasurelestheshouldhaveanyweaponabouthim。But，henowleanedforward，turningthecollarofhiswaistcoatwithaninquisitivefinger，andasked，\'Why，where\'syourwatch?\'
\'Ihaveleftitbehind。\'
\'Iwantit。Butitcanbefetched。I\'vetookafancytoit。\'
Bradleyansweredwithacontemptuouslaugh。
\'Iwantit，\'repeatedRiderhood，inaloudervoice，\'andImeantohaveit。\'
\'Thatiswhatyouwantofme，isit?\'
\'No，\'saidRiderhood，stilllouder；\'it\'son\'ypartofwhatIwantofyou。Iwantmoneyofyou。\'
\'Anythingelse?\'
\'Everythinkelse！\'roaredRiderhood，inaveryloudandfuriousway。\'Answermelikethat，andIwon\'ttalktoyouatall。\'
Bradleylookedathim。
\'Don\'tsomuchaslookatmelikethat，orIwon\'ttalktoyouatall，\'
vociferatedRiderhood。\'But，insteadoftalking，I\'llbringmyhanddownuponyouwithallitsweight，\'heavilysmitingthetablewithgreatforce，\'andsmashyou！\'
\'Goon，\'saidBradley，aftermoisteninghislips。
\'O！I\'magoingon。Don\'tyoufearbutI\'llgoonfull-fastenoughforyou，andfurenoughforyou，withoutyourtelling。Lookhere，BradleyHeadstone，Master。YoumighthavesplittheT\'othergovernortochipsandwedges，withoutmycaring，exceptthatI
mighthavecomeuponyouforaglassorsonowandthen。Elsewhyhavetodowithyouatall?Butwhenyoucopiedmyclothes，andwhenyoucopiedmyneckhankercher，andwhenyoushookblooduponmeafteryouhaddonethetrick，youdidwotI\'llbepaidforandpaidheavyfor。Ifitcometobethrow\'duponyou，youwastobereadytothrowituponme，wasyou?WhereelsebutinPlashwaterWeirMillLockwasthereamandressedaccordingasdescribed?WhereelsebutinPlashwaterWeirMillLockwasthereamanashadhadwordswithhimcomingthroughinhisboat?LookattheLock-keeperinPlashwaterWeirMillLock，inthemsameansweringclothesandwiththatsameansweringredneckhankercher，andseewhetherhisclotheshappenstobebloodyornot。Yes，theydohappentobebloody。Ah，youslydevil！\'
Bradley，verywhite，satlookingathiminsilence。
\'Buttwocouldplayatyourgame，\'saidRiderhood，snappinghisfingersathimhalfadozentimes，\'andIplayeditlongago；longaforeyoutriedyourclumsyhandatit；indayswhenyouhadn\'tbeguncroakingyourlectersorwhatnotinyourschool。Iknowtoafigurehowyoudoneit。Whereyoustoleaway，Icouldstealawayarteryou，anddoitknowingerthanyou。IknowhowyoucomeawayfromLondoninyourownclothes，andwhereyouchangedyourclothes，andhidyourclothes。Iseeyouwithmyowneyestakeyourownclothesfromtheirhiding-placeamongthemfelledtrees，andtakeadipintherivertoaccountforyourdressingyourself，toanyoneasmightcomeby。IseeyouriseupBradleyHeadstone，Master，whereyousatdownBargeman。IseeyoupitchyourBargeman\'sbundleintotheriver。IhookedyourBargeman\'sbundleoutoftheriver。I\'vegotyourBargeman\'sclothes，torethiswayandthatwaywiththescuffle，stainedgreenwiththegrass，andspatteredalloverwithwhatbustfromtheblows。I\'vegotthem，andI\'vegotyou。Idon\'tcareacursefortheT\'othergovernor，aliveordead，butIcareamanycursesformyownself。
Andasyoulaidyourplotsaginmeandwasaslydevilaginme，I\'llbepaidforit——I\'llbepaidforit——I\'llbepaidforit——tillI\'vedrainedyoudry！\'
Bradleylookedatthefire，withaworkingface，andwassilentforawhile。Atlasthesaid，withwhatseemedaninconsistentcomposureofvoiceandfeature:
\'Youcan\'tgetbloodoutofastone，Riderhood。\'
\'Icangetmoneyoutofaschoolmasterthough。\'
\'Youcan\'tgetoutofmewhatisnotinme。Youcan\'twrestfrommewhatIhavenotgot。Mineisbutapoorcalling。Youhavehadmorethantwoguineasfromme，already。Doyouknowhowlongithastakenmeallowingforalongandarduoustrainingtoearnsuchasum?\'
\'Idon\'tknow，norIdon\'tcare。Yoursisa\'spectablecalling。Tosaveyour\'spectability，it\'sworthyourwhiletopawneveryarticleofclothesyou\'vegot，selleverystickinyourhouse，andbegandborroweverypennyyoucangettrustedwith。Whenyou\'vedonethatandhandedover，I\'llleaveyou。Notafore。\'
\'Howdoyoumean，you\'llleaveme?\'
\'ImeanasI\'llkeepyoucompany，whereveryougo，whenyougoawayfromhere。LettheLocktakecareofitself。I\'lltakecareofyou，onceI\'vegotyou。\'
Bradleyagainlookedatthefire。Eyeinghimaside，Riderhoodtookuphispipe，refilledit，lightedit，andsatsmoking。Bradleyleanedhiselbowsonhisknees，andhisheaduponhishands，andlookedatthefirewithamostintentabstraction。
\'Riderhood，\'hesaid，raisinghimselfinhischair，afteralongsilence，anddrawingouthispurseandputtingitonthetable。\'SayIpartwiththis，whichisallthemoneyIhave；sayIletyouhavemywatch；saythateveryquarter，whenIdrawmysalary，Ipayyouacertainportionofit。\'
\'Saynothinkofthesort，\'retortedRiderhood，shakinghisheadashesmoked。\'You\'vegotawayonce，andIwon\'trunthechanceagin。I\'vehadtroubleenoughtofindyou，andshouldn\'thavefoundyou，ifIhadn\'tseenyouslippingalongthestreetovernight，andwatchedyoutillyouwassafehoused。I\'llhaveonesettlementwithyouforgoodandall。\'
\'Riderhood，Iamamanwhohaslivedaretiredlife。Ihavenoresourcesbeyondmyself。Ihaveabsolutelynofriends。\'
\'That\'salie，\'saidRiderhood。\'You\'vegotonefriendasIknowsof；
oneasisgoodforaSavings-Bankbook，orI\'mabluemonkey！\'
Bradley\'sfacedarkened，andhishandslowlyclosedonthepurseanddrewitback，ashesatlisteningforwhattheothershouldgoontosay。
\'Iwentintothewrongshop，fust，lastThursday，\'saidRiderhood。
\'Foundmyselfamongtheyoungladies，byGeorge！Overtheyoungladies，IseeaMissis。ThatMissisissweetenoughuponyou，Master，tosellherselfup，slap，togetyououtoftrouble。Makeherdoitthen。\'
BradleystaredathimsoverysuddenlythatRiderhood，notquiteknowinghowtotakeit，affectedtobeoccupiedwiththeencirclingsmokefromhispipe；fanningitawaywithhishand，andblowingitoff。
\'Youspoketothemistress，didyou?\'inquiredBradley，withthatformercomposureofvoiceandfeaturethatseemedinconsistent，andwithavertedeyes。
\'Poof！Yes，\'saidRiderhood，withdrawinghisattentionfromthesmoke。\'Ispoketoher。Ididn\'tsaymuchtoher。ShewasputinaflusterbymydroppinginamongtheyoungladiesIneverdidsetupforalady\'sman，andshetookmeintoherparlourtohopeastherewasnothinkwrong。Itellsher，“Ono，nothinkwrong。Themaster\'smywerygoodfriend。”ButIseehowthelandlaid，andthatshewascomfortableoff。\'
Bradleyputthepurseinhispocket，graspedhisleftwristwithhisrighthand，andsatrigidlycontemplatingthefire。
\'Shecouldn\'tlivemorehandytoyouthanshedoes，\'saidRiderhood，\'andwhenIgoeshomewithyouasofcourseIamagoing，Irecommendyoutocleanheroutwithoutlossoftime。
Youcanmarryher，arteryouandmehavecometoasettlement。
She\'snice-looking，andIknowyoucan\'tbekeepingcompanywithnooneelse，havingbeensolatelydisapintedinanotherquarter。\'
NotoneotherworddidBradleyutterallthatnight。Notoncedidhechangehisattitude，orloosenhisholduponhiswrist。Rigidbeforethefire，asifitwereacharmedflamethatwasturninghimold，hesat，withthedarklinesdeepeninginhisface，itsstarebecomingmoreandmorehaggard，itssurfaceturningwhiterandwhiterasifitwerebeingoverspreadwithashes，andtheverytextureandcolourofhishairdegenerating。
Notuntilthelatedaylightmadethewindowtransparent，didthisdecayingstatuemove。Thenitslowlyarose，andsatinthewindowlookingout。
Riderhoodhadkepthischairallnight。Intheearlierpartofthenighthehadmutteredtwiceorthricethatitwasbittercold；orthatthefireburntfast，whenhegotuptomendit；but，ashecouldelicitfromhiscompanionneithersoundnormovement，hehadafterwardsheldhispeace。Hewasmakingsomedisorderlypreparationsforcoffee，whenBradleycamefromthewindowandputonhisoutercoatandhat。
\'Hadn\'tusbetterhaveabito\'breakfastaforewestart?\'saidRiderhood。\'Itain\'tgoodtofreezeaemptystomach，Master。\'
Withoutasigntoshowthatheheard，BradleywalkedoutoftheLockHouse。Catchingupfromthetableapieceofbread，andtakinghisBargeman\'sbundleunderhisarm，Riderhoodimmediatelyfollowedhim。BradleyturnedtowardsLondon。
Riderhoodcaughthimup，andwalkedathisside。
Thetwomentrudgedon，sidebyside，insilence，fullthreemiles。
Suddenly，Bradleyturnedtoretracehiscourse。Instantly，Riderhoodturnedlikewise，andtheywentbacksidebyside。
Bradleyre-enteredtheLockHouse。SodidRiderhood。Bradleysatdowninthewindow。Riderhoodwarmedhimselfatthefire。Afteranhourormore，Bradleyabruptlygotupagain，andagainwentout，butthistimeturnedtheotherway。Riderhoodwascloseafterhim，caughthimupinafewpaces，andwalkedathisside。
Thistime，asbefore，whenhefoundhisattendantnottobeshakenoff，Bradleysuddenlyturnedback。Thistime，asbefore，Riderhoodturnedbackalongwithhim。But，notthistime，asbefore，didtheygointotheLockHouse，forBradleycametoastandonthesnow-
coveredturfbytheLock，lookinguptheriveranddowntheriver。
Navigationwasimpededbythefrost，andthescenewasamerewhiteandyellowdesert。
\'Come，come，Master，\'urgedRiderhood，athisside。\'Thisisadrygame。Andwhere\'sthegoodofit?Youcan\'tgetridofme，exceptbycomingtoasettlement。Iamagoingalongwithyouwhereveryougo。\'
Withoutawordofreply，Bradleypassedquicklyfromhimoverthewoodenbridgeonthelockgates。\'Why，there\'sevenlesssenseinthismovethant\'other，\'saidRiderhood，following。\'TheWeir\'sthere，andyou\'llhavetocomeback，youknow。\'
Withouttakingtheleastnotice，Bradleyleanedhisbodyagainstapost，inarestingattitude，andthererestedwithhiseyescastdown。
\'Beingbroughthere，\'saidRiderhood，gruffly，\'I\'llturnittosomeusebychangingmygates。\'Witharattleandarushofwater，hethenswung-tothelockgatesthatwerestandingopen，beforeopeningtheothers。So，bothsetsofgateswere，forthemoment，closed。
\'You\'dbetterbyfarbereasonable，BradleyHeadstone，Master，\'
saidRiderhood，passinghim，\'orI\'lldrainyouallthedryerforit，whenwedosettle——Ah！Wouldyou！\'
Bradleyhadcaughthimroundthebody。Heseemedtobegirdledwithanironring。TheywereonthebrinkoftheLock，aboutmidwaybetweenthetwosetsofgates。
\'Letgo！\'saidRiderhood，\'orI\'llgetmyknifeoutandslashyouwhereverIcancutyou。Letgo！\'
BradleywasdrawingtotheLock-edge。Riderhoodwasdrawingawayfromit。Itwasastronggrapple，andafiercestruggle，armandleg。Bradleygothimround，withhisbacktotheLock，andstillworkedhimbackward。
\'Letgo！\'saidRiderhood。\'Stop！Whatareyoutryingat?Youcan\'tdrownMe。Ain\'tItoldyouthatthemanashascomethroughdrowningcanneverbedrowned?Ican\'tbedrowned。\'
\'Icanbe！\'returnedBradley，inadesperate，clenchedvoice。\'Iamresolvedtobe。I\'llholdyouliving，andI\'llholdyoudead。Comedown！\'
Riderhoodwentoverintothesmoothpit，backward，andBradleyHeadstoneuponhim。Whenthetwowerefound，lyingundertheoozeandscumbehindoneoftherottinggates，Riderhood\'sholdhadrelaxed，probablyinfalling，andhiseyeswerestaringupward。
But，hewasgirdledstillwithBradley\'sironring，andtherivetsoftheironringheldtight。
Chapter16
PERSONSANDTHINGSINGENERAL
MrandMrsJohnHarmon\'sfirstdelightfuloccupationwas，tosetallmattersrightthathadstrayedinanywaywrong，orthatmight，could，would，orshould，havestrayedinanywaywrong，whiletheirnamewasinabeyance。IntracingoutaffairsforwhichJohn\'sfictitiousdeathwastobeconsideredinanywayresponsible，theyusedaverybroadandfreeconstruction；regarding，forinstance，thedolls\'dressmakerashavingaclaimontheirprotection，becauseofherassociationwithMrsEugeneWrayburn，andbecauseofMrsEugene\'soldassociation，inherturn，withthedarksideofthestory。Itfollowedthattheoldman，Riah，asagoodandserviceablefriendtoboth，wasnottobedisclaimed。NorevenMrInspector，ashavingbeentrepannedintoanindustrioushuntonafalsescent。Itmayberemarked，inconnexionwiththatworthyofficer，thatarumourshortlyafterwardspervadedtheForce，totheeffectthathehadconfidedtoMissAbbeyPotterson，overajugofmellowflipinthebaroftheSixJollyFellowshipPorters，thathe\'didn\'tstandtoloseafarthing\'throughMrHarmon\'scomingtolife，butwasquiteaswellsatisfiedasifthatgentlemanhadbeenbarbarouslymurdered，andheMrInspectorhadpocketedthegovernmentreward。
Inalltheirarrangementsofsuchnature，MrandMrsJohnHarmonderivedmuchassistancefromtheireminentsolicitor，MrMortimerLightwood；wholaidabouthimprofessionallywithsuchunwonteddespatchandintention，thatapieceofworkwasvigorouslypursuedassoonascutout；wherebyYoungBlightwasactedonasbythattransatlanticdramwhichispoeticallynamedAnEye-
Opener，andfoundhimselfstaringatrealclientsinsteadofoutofwindow。TheaccessibilityofRiahprovingveryusefulastoafewhintstowardsthedisentanglementofEugene\'saffairs，LightwoodappliedhimselfwithinfinitezesttoattackingandharassingMrFledgeby:who，discoveringhimselfindangerofbeingblownintotheairbycertainexplosivetransactionsinwhichhehadbeenengaged，andhavingbeensufficientlyflayedunderhisbeating，cametoaparleyandaskedforquarter。TheharmlessTwemlowprofitedbytheconditionsenteredinto，thoughhelittlethoughtit。
MrRiahunaccountablymelted；waitedinpersononhimoverthestableyardinDukeStreet，StJames\'s，nolongerraveningbutmild，toinformhimthatpaymentofinterestasheretofore，buthenceforthatMrLightwood\'soffices，wouldappeasehisJewishrancour；anddepartedwiththesecretthatMrJohnHarmonhadadvancedthemoneyandbecomethecreditor。Thus，wasthesublimeSnigsworth\'swrathaverted，andthusdidhesnortnolargeramountofmoralgrandeurattheCorinthiancolumnintheprintoverthefireplace，thanwasnormallyinhisandtheBritishconstitution。
MrsWilfer\'sfirstvisittotheMendicant\'sbrideatthenewabodeofMendicancy，wasagrandevent。PahadbeensentforintotheCity，ontheverydayoftakingpossession，andhadbeenstunnedwithastonishment，andbrought-to，andledaboutthehousebyoneear，tobeholditsvarioustreasures，andhadbeenenrapturedandenchanted。PahadalsobeenappointedSecretary，andhadbeenenjoinedtogiveinstantnoticeofresignationtoChicksey，Veneering，andStobbles，foreverandever。ButMacamelater，andcame，aswasherdue，instate。
ThecarriagewassentforMa，whoentereditwithabearingworthyoftheoccasion，accompanied，ratherthansupported，byMissLavinia，whoaltogetherdeclinedtorecognizethematernalmajesty。MrGeorgeSampsonmeeklyfollowed。Hewasreceivedinthevehicle，byMrsWilfer，asifadmittedtothehonourofassistingatafuneralinthefamily，andshethenissuedtheorder，\'Onward！\'totheMendicant\'smenial。
\'Iwishtogoodness，Ma，\'saidLavvy，throwingherselfbackamongthecushions，withherarmscrossed，\'thatyou\'dlollalittle。\'
\'How！\'repeatedMrsWilfer。\'Loll！\'
\'Yes，Ma。\'
\'Ihope，\'saidtheimpressivelady，\'Iamincapableofit。\'
\'Iamsureyoulookso，Ma。Butwhyoneshouldgoouttodinewithone\'sowndaughterorsister，asifone\'sunder-petticoatwasablackboard，IdoNOTunderstand。\'
\'NeitherdoIunderstand，\'retortedMrsWilfer，withdeepscorn，\'howayoungladycanmentionthegarmentinthenameofwhichyouhaveindulged。Iblushforyou。\'
\'Thankyou，Ma，\'saidLavvy，yawning，\'butIcandoitformyself，I
amobligedtoyou，whenthere\'sanyoccasion。\'
Here，MrSampson，withtheviewofestablishingharmony，whichheneverunderanycircumstancessucceededindoing，saidwithanagreeablesmile:\'Afterall，youknow，ma\'am，weknowit\'sthere。\'
Andimmediatelyfeltthathehadcommittedhimself。
\'Weknowit\'sthere！\'saidMrsWilfer，glaring。
\'Really，George，\'remonstratedMissLavinia，\'ImustsaythatIdon\'tunderstandyourallusions，andthatIthinkyoumightbemoredelicateandlesspersonal。\'
\'Goit！\'criedMrSampson，becoming，ontheshortestnotice，apreytodespair。\'Ohyes！Goit，MissLaviniaWilfer！\'
\'Whatyoumaymean，GeorgeSampson，byyouromnibus-drivingexpressions，Icannotpretendtoimagine。Neither，\'saidMissLavinia，\'MrGeorgeSampson，doIwishtoimagine。ItisenoughformetoknowinmyownheartthatIamnotgoingto——\'havingimprudentlygotintoasentencewithoutprovidingawayoutofit，MissLaviniawasconstrainedtoclosewith\'goingtoit\'。Aweakconclusionwhich，however，derivedsomeappearanceofstrengthfromdisdain。
\'Ohyes！\'criedMrSampson，withbitterness。\'Thusiteveris。I
never——\'
\'Ifyoumeantosay，\'MissLavvycuthimshort，thatyouneverbroughtupayounggazelle，youmaysaveyourselfthetrouble，becausenobodyinthiscarriagesupposesthatyoueverdid。Weknowyoubetter。\'Asifthiswereahome-thrust。
\'Lavinia，\'returnedMrSampson，inadismalvein，Ididnotmeantosayso。WhatIdidmeantosay，was，thatIneverexpectedtoretainmyfavouredplaceinthisfamily，afterFortuneshedherbeamsuponit。Whydoyoutakeme，\'saidMrSampson，\'totheglitteringhallswithwhichIcannevercompete，andthentauntmewithmymoderatesalary?Isitgenerous?Isitkind?\'
Thestatelylady，MrsWilfer，perceivingheropportunityofdeliveringafewremarksfromthethrone，heretookupthealtercation。
\'MrSampson，\'shebegan，\'Icannotpermityoutomisrepresenttheintentionsofachildofmine。\'
\'Lethimalone，Ma，\'MissLavvyinterposedwithhaughtiness。\'Itisindifferenttomewhathesaysordoes。\'
\'Nay，Lavinia，\'quothMrsWilfer，\'thistouchesthebloodofthefamily。IfMrGeorgeSampsonattributes，eventomyyoungestdaughter——\'
\'Idon\'tseewhyyoushouldusetheword“even“，Ma，\'MissLavvyinterposed，\'becauseIamquiteasimportantasanyoftheothers。\'
\'Peace！\'saidMrsWilfer，solemnly。\'Irepeat，ifMrGeorgeSampsonattributes，tomyyoungestdaughter，grovellingmotives，heattributesthemequallytothemotherofmyyoungestdaughter。
Thatmotherrepudiatesthem，anddemandsofMrGeorgeSampson，asayouthofhonour，whatheWOULDhave?Imaybemistaken——nothingismorelikely——butMrGeorgeSampson，\'
proceededMrsWilfer，majesticallywavinghergloves，\'appearstometobeseatedinafirst-classequipage。MrGeorgeSampsonappearstometobeonhisway，byhisownadmission，toaresidencethatmaybetermedPalatial。MrGeorgeSampsonappearstometobeinvitedtoparticipateinthe——shallIsaythe——
Elevationwhichhasdescendedonthefamilywithwhichheisambitious，shallIsaytoMingle?Whence，then，thistoneonMrSampson\'spart?\'
\'Itisonly，ma\'am，\'MrSampsonexplained，inexceedinglylowspirits，\'because，inapecuniarysense，Iampainfullyconsciousofmyunworthiness。Laviniaisnowhighlyconnected。CanIhopethatshewillstillremainthesameLaviniaasofold?AndisitnotpardonableifIfeelsensitive，whenIseeadispositiononherparttotakemeupshort?\'
\'Ifyouarenotsatisfiedwithyourposition，sir，\'observedMissLavinia，withmuchpoliteness，\'wecansetyoudownatanyturningyoumaypleasetoindicatetomysister\'scoachman。\'
\'DearestLavinia，\'urgedMrSampson，pathetically，\'Iadoreyou。\'
\'Thenifyoucan\'tdoitinamoreagreeablemanner，\'returnedtheyounglady，\'Iwishyouwouldn\'t。\'
\'Ialso，\'pursuedMrSampson，\'respectyou，ma\'am，toanextentwhichmusteverbebelowyourmerits，Iamwellaware，butstilluptoanuncommonmark。Bearwithawretch，Lavinia，bearwithawretch，ma\'am，whofeelsthenoblesacrificesyoumakeforhim，butisgoadedalmosttomadness，\'MrSampsonslappedhisforehead，\'whenhethinksofcompetingwiththerichandinfluential。\'
\'Whenyouhavetocompetewiththerichandinfluential，itwillprobablybementionedtoyou，\'saidMissLavvy，\'ingoodtime。Atleast，itwillifthecaseisMYcase。\'
MrSampsonimmediatelyexpressedhisferventOpinionthatthiswas\'morethanhuman\'，andwasbroughtuponhiskneesatMissLavinia\'sfeet。
Itwasthecrowningadditionindispensabletothefullenjoymentofbothmotheranddaughter，tobearMrSampson，agratefulcaptive，intotheglitteringhallshehadmentioned，andtoparadehimthroughthesame，atoncealivingwitnessoftheirglory，andabrightinstanceoftheircondescension。Ascendingthestaircase，MissLaviniapermittedhimtowalkatherside，withtheairofsaying:\'Notwithstandingallthesesurroundings，Iamyoursasyet，George。Howlongitmaylastisanotherquestion，butIamyoursasyet。\'Shealsobenignantlyintimatedtohim，aloud，thenatureoftheobjectsuponwhichhelooked，andtowhichhewasunaccustomed:as，\'Exotics，George，\'\'Anaviary，George，\'\'Anormoluclock，George，\'andthelike。While，throughthewholeofthedecorations，MrsWilferledthewaywiththebearingofaSavageChief，whowouldfeelhimselfcompromisedbymanifestingtheslightesttokenofsurpriseoradmiration。
Indeed，thebearingofthisimpressivewoman，throughouttheday，wasapatterntoallimpressivewomenundersimilarcircumstances。SherenewedtheacquaintanceofMrandMrsBoffin，asifMrandMrsBoffinhadsaidofherwhatshehadsaidofthem，andasifTimealonecouldquitewearherinjuryout。Sheregardedeveryservantwhoapproachedher，asherswornenemy，expresslyintendingtoofferheraffrontswiththedishes，andtopourforthoutragesonhermoralfeelingsfromthedecanters。Shesaterectattable，ontherighthandofherson-in-law，ashalfsuspectingpoisonintheviands，andasbearingupwithnativeforceofcharacteragainstotherdeadlyambushes。HercarriagetowardsBellawasasacarriagetowardsayoungladyofgoodposition，whomshehadmetinsocietyafewyearsago。Evenwhen，slightlythawingundertheinfluenceofsparklingchampagne，sherelatedtoherson-in-lawsomepassagesofdomesticinterestconcerningherpapa，sheinfusedintothenarrativesuchArcticsuggestionsofherhavingbeenanunappreciatedblessingtomankind，sinceherpapa\'sdays，andalsoofthatgentleman\'shavingbeenafrostyimpersonationofafrostyrace，asstruckcoldtotheverysolesofthefeetofthehearers。TheInexhaustiblebeingproduced，staring，andevidentlyintendingaweakandwashysmileshortly，nosoonerbeheldher，thanitwasstrickenspasmodicandinconsolable。Whenshetookherleaveatlast，itwouldhavebeenhardtosaywhetheritwaswiththeairofgoingtothescaffoldherself，orofleavingtheinmatesofthehouseforimmediateexecution。Yet，JohnHarmonenjoyeditallmerrily，andtoldhiswife，whenheandshewerealone，thathernaturalwayshadneverseemedsodearlynaturalasbesidethisfoil，andthatalthoughhedidnotdisputeherbeingherfather\'sdaughter，heshouldeverremainstedfastinthefaiththatshecouldnotbehermother\'s。
Thisvisitwas，ashasbeensaid，agrandevent。Anotherevent，notgrandbutdeemedinthehouseaspecialone，occurredataboutthesameperiod；andthiswas，thefirstinterviewbetweenMrSloppyandMissWren。
Thedolls\'dressmaker，beingatworkfortheInexhaustibleuponafull-dresseddollsometwosizeslargerthanthatyoungperson，MrSloppyundertooktocallforit，anddidso。
\'Comein，sir，\'saidMissWren，whowasworkingatherbench。
\'Andwhomayyoube?\'
MrSloppyintroducedhimselfbynameandbuttons。
\'Ohindeed！\'criedJenny。\'Ah！Ihavebeenlookingforwardtoknowingyou。Iheardofyourdistinguishingyourself。\'
\'Didyou，Miss?\'grinnedSloppy。\'IamsureIamgladtohearit，butIdon\'tknowhow。\'
\'Pitchingsomebodyintoamud-cart，\'saidMissWren。
\'Oh！Thatway！\'criedSloppy。\'Yes，Miss。\'Andthrewbackhisheadandlaughed。
\'Blessus！\'exclaimedMissWren，withastart。\'Don\'topenyourmouthaswideasthat，youngman，orit\'llcatchso，andnotshutagainsomeday。\'
MrSloppyopenedit，ifpossible，wider，andkeptitopenuntilhislaughwasout。
\'Why，you\'relikethegiant，\'saidMissWren，\'whenhecamehomeinthelandofBeanstalk，andwantedJackforsupper。\'
\'Washegood-looking，Miss?\'askedSloppy。
\'No，\'saidMissWren。\'Ugly。\'
Hervisitorglancedroundtheroom——whichhadmanycomfortsinitnow，thathadnotbeeninitbefore——andsaid:\'Thisisaprettyplace，Miss。\'
\'Gladyouthinkso，sir，\'returnedMissWren。\'AndwhatdoyouthinkofMe?\'
ThehonestyofMrSloppybeingseverelytaxedbythequestion，hetwistedabutton，grinned，andfaltered。
\'Outwithit！\'saidMissWren，withanarchlook。\'Don\'tyouthinkmeaqueerlittlecomicality?\'Inshakingherheadathimafteraskingthequestion，sheshookherhairdown。
\'Oh！\'criedSloppy，inaburstofadmiration。\'Whatalot，andwhatacolour！\'
MissWren，withherusualexpressivehitch，wentonwithherwork。But，leftherhairasitwas；notdispleasedbytheeffectithadmade。
\'Youdon\'tliveherealone；doyou，Miss?\'askedSloppy。
\'No，\'saidMissWren，withachop。\'Liveherewithmyfairygodmother。\'
\'With；\'MrSloppycouldn\'tmakeitout；\'withwhodidyousay，Miss?\'
\'Well！\'repliedMissWren，moreseriously。\'Withmysecondfather。
Orwithmyfirst，forthatmatter。\'Andsheshookherhead，anddrewasigh。\'IfyouhadknownapoorchildIusedtohavehere，\'
sheadded，\'you\'dhaveunderstoodme。Butyoudidn\'t，andyoucan\'t。Allthebetter！\'
\'Youmusthavebeentaughtalongtime，\'saidSloppy，glancingatthearrayofdollsinhand，\'beforeyoucametoworksoneatly，Miss，andwithsuchaprettytaste。\'
\'Neverwastaughtastitch，youngman！\'returnedthedress-maker，tossingherhead。\'Justgobbledandgobbled，tillIfoundouthowtodoit。Badlyenoughatfirst，butbetternow。\'
\'AndherehaveI，\'saidSloppy，insomethingofaself-reproachfultone，\'beenalearningandalearning，andherehasMrBoffinbeenapayingandapaying，eversolong！\'
\'Ihaveheardwhatyourtradeis，\'observedMissWren；\'it\'scabinet-making。\'
MrSloppynodded。\'NowthattheMoundsisdonewith，itis。I\'lltellyouwhat，Miss。Ishouldliketomakeyousomething。\'
\'Muchobliged。Butwhat?\'
\'Icouldmakeyou，\'saidSloppy，surveyingtheroom，\'Icouldmakeyouahandysetofneststolaythedollsin。OrIcouldmakeyouahandylittlesetofdrawers，tokeepyoursilksandthreadsandscrapsin。OrIcouldturnyouararehandleforthatcrutch-stick，ifitbelongstohimyoucallyourfather。\'
\'Itbelongstome，\'returnedthelittlecreature，withaquickflushofherfaceandneck。\'Iamlame。\'
PoorSloppyflushedtoo，fortherewasaninstinctivedelicacybehindhisbuttons，andhisownhandhadstruckit。Hesaid，perhaps，thebestthinginthewayofamendsthatcouldbesaid。\'I
amverygladit\'syours，becauseI\'dratherornamentitforyouthanforanyoneelse。PleasemayIlookatit?\'
MissWrenwasintheactofhandingittohimoverherbench，whenshepaused。\'Butyouhadbetterseemeuseit，\'shesaid，sharply。\'Thisistheway。Hoppetty，Kicketty，Pep-peg-peg。Notpretty；isit?\'
\'Itseemstomethatyouhardlywantitatall，\'saidSloppy。
Thelittledressmakersatdownagain，andgaveitintohishand，saying，withthatbetterlookuponher，andwithasmile:\'Thankyou！\'
\'Andasconcerningthenestsandthedrawers，\'saidSloppy，aftermeasuringthehandleonhissleeve，andsoftlystandingthestickasideagainstthewall，\'why，itwouldbearealpleasuretome。I\'veheerdtellthatyoucansingmostbeautiful；andIshouldbebetterpaidwithasongthanwithanymoney，forIalwayslovedthelikesofthat，andoftengiv\'MrsHigdenandJohnnyacomicsongmyself，with“Spoken“init。Thoughthat\'snotyoursort，I\'llwager。\'
\'Youareaverykindyoungman，\'returnedthedressmaker；\'areallykindyoungman。Iacceptyouroffer——IsupposeHewon\'tmind，\'
sheaddedasanafterthought，shrugginghershoulders；\'andifhedoes，hemay！\'
\'Meaninghimthatyoucallyourfather，Miss，\'askedSloppy。
\'No，no，\'repliedMissWren。\'Him，Him，Him！\'
\'Him，him，him?\'repeatedSloppy；staringabout，asifforHim。
\'Himwhoiscomingtocourtandmarryme，\'returnedMissWren。
\'Dearme，howslowyouare！\'
\'Oh！HIM！\'saidSloppy。Andseemedtoturnthoughtfulandalittletroubled。\'Ineverthoughtofhim。Whenishecoming，Miss?\'
\'Whataquestion！\'criedMissWren。\'HowshouldIknow！\'
\'Whereishecomingfrom，Miss?\'
\'Why，goodgracious，howcanItell！Heiscomingfromsomewhereorother，Isuppose，andheiscomingsomedayorother，Isuppose。Idon\'tknowanymoreabouthim，atpresent。\'
ThistickledMrSloppyasanextraordinarilygoodjoke，andhethrewbackhisheadandlaughedwithmeasurelessenjoyment。Atthesightofhimlaughinginthatabsurdway，thedolls\'dressmakerlaughedveryheartilyindeed。Sotheybothlaughed，tilltheyweretired。
\'There，there，there！\'saidMissWren。\'Forgoodness\'sake，stop，Giant，orIshallbeswallowedupalive，beforeIknowit。Andtothisminuteyouhaven\'tsaidwhatyou\'vecomefor。\'
\'IhavecomeforlittleMissHarmonsesdoll，\'saidSloppy。
\'Ithoughtasmuch，\'remarkedMissWren，\'andhereislittleMissHarmonsesdollwaitingforyou。She\'sfoldedupinsilverpaper，yousee，asifshewaswrappedfromheadtofootinnewBanknotes。Takecareofher，andthere\'smyhand，andthankyouagain。\'
\'I\'lltakemorecareofherthanifshewasagoldimage，\'saidSloppy，\'andthere\'sbothMYhands，Miss，andI\'llsooncomebackagain。\'
But，thegreatesteventofall，inthenewlifeofMrandMrsJohnHarmon，wasavisitfromMrandMrsEugeneWrayburn。SadlywanandwornwastheoncegallantEugene，andwalkedrestingonhiswife\'sarm，andleaningheavilyuponastick。But，hewasdailygrowingstrongerandbetter，anditwasdeclaredbythemedicalattendantsthathemightnotbemuchdisfiguredby-and-by。Itwasagrandevent，indeed，whenMrandMrsEugeneWrayburncametostayatMrandMrsJohnHarmon\'shouse:where，bytheway，MrandMrsBoffinexquisitelyhappy，anddailycruisingabout，tolookatshops，werelikewisestayingindefinitely。
ToMrEugeneWrayburn，inconfidence，didMrsJohnHarmonimpartwhatshehadknownofthestateofhiswife\'saffections，inhisrecklesstime。AndtoMrsJohnHarmon，inconfidence，didMrEugeneWrayburnimpartthat，pleaseGod，sheshouldseehowhiswifehadchangedhim！
\'Imakenoprotestations，\'saidEugene；\'——whodoes，whomeansthem！——Ihavemadearesolution。\'
\'Butwouldyoubelieve，Bella，\'interposedhiswife，comingtoresumehernurse\'splaceathisside，forhenevergotonwellwithouther:\'thatonourweddingdayhetoldmehealmostthoughtthebestthinghecoulddo，wastodie?\'
\'AsIdidn\'tdoit，Lizzie，\'saidEugene，\'I\'lldothatbetterthingyousuggested——foryoursake。\'
Thatsameafternoon，Eugenelyingonhiscouchinhisownroomupstairs，Lightwoodcametochatwithhim，whileBellatookhiswifeoutforaride。\'Nothingshortofforcewillmakehergo，Eugenehadsaid；so，Bellahadplayfullyforcedher。
\'Dearoldfellow，\'EugenebeganwithLightwood，reachinguphishand，\'youcouldn\'thavecomeatabettertime，formymindisfull，andIwanttoemptyit。First，ofmypresent，beforeItouchuponmyfuture。M。R。F。，whoisamuchyoungercavalierthanI，andaprofessedadmirerofbeauty，wassoaffableastoremarktheotherdayhepaidusavisitoftwodaysuptheriverthere，andmuchobjectedtotheaccommodationofthehotel，thatLizzieoughttohaveherportraitpainted。Which，comingfromM。R。F。，maybeconsideredequivalenttoamelodramaticblessing。\'
\'Youaregettingwell，\'saidMortimer，withasmile。
\'Really，\'saidEugene，\'Imeanit。WhenM。R。F。saidthat，andfolloweditupbyrollingtheclaretforwhichhecalled，andI
paid，inhismouth，andsaying，“Mydearson，whydoyoudrinkthistrash?“itwastantamountinhim——toapaternalbenedictiononourunion，accompaniedwithagushoftears。ThecoolnessofM。R。F。isnottobemeasuredbyordinarystandards。\'
\'Trueenough，\'saidLightwood。
\'That\'sall，\'pursuedEugene，\'thatIshalleverhearfromM。R。F。
onthesubject，andhewillcontinuetosaunterthroughtheworldwithhishatononeside。Mymarriagebeingthussolemnlyrecognizedatthefamilyaltar，Ihavenofurthertroubleonthatscore。Next，youreallyhavedonewondersforme，Mortimer，ineasingmymoney-perplexities，andwithsuchaguardianandstewardbesideme，asthepreserverofmylifeIamhardlystrongyet，yousee，forIamnotmanenoughtorefertoherwithoutatremblingvoice——sheissoinexpressiblydeartome，Mortimer！，thelittlethatIcancallmyownwillbemorethaniteverhasbeen。
Itneedbemore，foryouknowwhatitalwayshasbeeninmyhands。Nothing。\'
\'Worsethannothing，Ifancy，Eugene。MyownsmallincomeI
devoutlywishthatmygrandfatherhadleftittotheOceanratherthantome！hasbeenaneffectiveSomething，inthewayofpreventingmefromturningtoatAnything。AndIthinkyourshasbeenmuchthesame。\'
\'Therespakethevoiceofwisdom，\'saidEugene。\'Weareshepherdsboth。Inturningtoatlast，weturntoinearnest。Letussaynomoreofthat，forafewyearstocome。Now，Ihavehadanidea，Mortimer，oftakingmyselfandmywifetooneofthecolonies，andworkingatmyvocationthere。\'
\'Ishouldbelostwithoutyou，Eugene；butyoumayberight。\'
\'No，\'saidEugene，emphatically。\'Notright。Wrong！\'
Hesaiditwithsuchalively——almostangry——flash，thatMortimershowedhimselfgreatlysurprised。
\'Youthinkthisthumpedheadofmineisexcited?\'Eugenewenton，withahighlook；\'notso，believeme。IcansaytoyouofthehealthfulmusicofmypulsewhatHamletsaidofhis。Mybloodisup，butwholesomelyup，whenIthinkofit。Tellme！ShallIturncowardtoLizzie，andsneakawaywithher，asifIwereashamedofher！Wherewouldyourfriend\'spartinthisworldbe，Mortimer，ifshehadturnedcowardtohim，andonimmeasurablybetteroccasion?\'
\'Honourableandstanch，\'saidLightwood。\'Andyet，Eugene——\'
\'Andyetwhat，Mortimer?\'
\'Andyet，areyousurethatyoumightnotfeelforhersake，Isayforhersakeanyslightcoldnesstowardsheronthepartof——
Society?\'
\'O！YouandImaywellstumbleattheword，\'returnedEugene，laughing。\'DowemeanourTippins?\'
\'Perhapswedo，\'saidMortimer，laughingalso。
\'Faith，weDO！\'returnedEugene，withgreatanimation。\'Wemayhidebehindthebushandbeataboutit，butweDO！Now，mywifeissomethingnearertomyheart，Mortimer，thanTippinsis，andI
oweheralittlemorethanIowetoTippins，andIamratherprouderofherthanIeverwasofTippins。Therefore，Iwillfightitouttothelastgasp，withherandforher，here，intheopenfield。
WhenIhideher，orstrikeforher，faint-heartedly，inaholeoracorner，doyouwhomIlovenextbestuponearth，tellmewhatI
shallmostrighteouslydeservetobetold:——thatshewouldhavedonewelltoturnmeoverwithherfootthatnightwhenIlaybleedingtodeath，andspatinmydastardface。\'
Theglowthatshoneuponhimashespokethewords，soirradiatedhisfeaturesthathelooked，forthetime，asthoughhehadneverbeenmutilated。HisfriendrespondedasEugenewouldhavehadhimrespond，andtheydiscoursedofthefutureuntilLizziecameback。Afterresumingherplaceathisside，andtenderlytouchinghishandsandhishead，shesaid:
\'Eugene，dear，youmademegoout，butIoughttohavestayedwithyou。Youaremoreflushedthanyouhavebeenformanydays。
Whathaveyoubeendoing?\'
\'Nothing，\'repliedEugene，\'butlookingforwardtoyourcomingback。\'
\'AndtalkingtoMrLightwood，\'saidLizzie，turningtohimwithasmile。\'ButitcannothavebeenSocietythatdisturbedyou。\'
\'Faith，mydearlove！\'retortedEugene，inhisoldairymanner，ashelaughedandkissedher，\'IratherthinkitWASSocietythough！\'
ThewordransomuchinMortimerLightwood\'sthoughtsashewenthometotheTemplethatnight，thatheresolvedtotakealookatSociety，whichhehadnotseenforaconsiderableperiod。
Chapter17
THEVOICEOFSOCIETY
BehovesMortimerLightwood，therefore，toansweradinnercardfromMrandMrsVeneeringrequestingthehonour，andtosignifythatMrMortimerLightwoodwillbehappytohavetheotherhonour。TheVeneeringshavebeen，asusual，indefatigablydealingdinnercardstoSociety，andwhoeverdesirestotakeahandhadbestbequickaboutit，foritiswrittenintheBooksoftheInsolventFatesthatVeneeringshallmakearesoundingsmashnextweek。
Yes。Havingfoundoutthecluetothatgreatmysteryhowpeoplecancontrivetolivebeyondtheirmeans，andhavingover-jobbedhisjobberiesaslegislatordeputedtotheUniversebythepureelectorsofPocket-Breaches，itshallcometopassnextweekthatVeneeringwillaccepttheChilternHundreds，thatthelegalgentlemaninBritannia\'sconfidencewillagainacceptthePocket-
BreachesThousands，andthattheVeneeringswillretiretoCalais，theretoliveonMrsVeneering\'sdiamondsinwhichMrVeneering，asagoodhusband，hasfromtimetotimeinvestedconsiderablesums，andtorelatetoNeptuneandothers，howthat，beforeVeneeringretiredfromParliament，theHouseofCommonswascomposedofhimselfandthesixhundredandfifty-sevendearestandoldestfriendshehadintheworld。Itshalllikewisecometopass，atasnearlyaspossiblethesameperiod，thatSocietywilldiscoverthatitalwaysdiddespiseVeneering，anddistrustVeneering，andthatwhenitwenttoVeneering\'stodinneritalwayshadmisgivings——thoughverysecretlyatthetime，itwouldseem，andinaperfectlyprivateandconfidentialmanner。
Thenextweek\'sbooksoftheInsolventFates，however，beingnotyetopened，thereistheusualrushtotheVeneerings，ofthepeoplewhogototheirhousetodinewithoneanotherandnotwiththem。
ThereisLadyTippins。TherearePodsnaptheGreat，andMrsPodsnap。ThereisTwemlow。ThereareBuffer，Boots，andBrewer。ThereistheContractor，whoisProvidencetofivehundredthousandmen。ThereistheChairman，travellingthreethousandmilesperweek。Thereisthebrilliantgeniuswhoturnedthesharesintothatremarkablyexactsumofthreehundredandseventyfivethousandpounds，noshillings，andnopence。
Towhom，addMortimerLightwood，cominginamongthemwithareassumptionofhisoldlanguidair，foundedonEugene，andbelongingtothedayswhenhetoldthestoryofthemanfromSomewhere。
Thatfreshfairy，Tippins，allbutscreamsatsightofherfalseswain。Shesummonsthedesertertoherwithherfan；butthedeserter，predeterminednottocome，talksBritainwithPodsnap。
PodsnapalwaystalksBritain，andtalksasifhewereasortofPrivateWatchmanemployed，intheBritishinterests，againsttherestoftheworld。\'WeknowwhatRussiameans，sir，\'saysPodsnap；\'weknowwhatFrancewants；weseewhatAmericaisupto；butweknowwhatEnglandis。That\'senoughforus。\'
However，whendinnerisserved，andLightwooddropsintohisoldplaceoveragainstLadyTippins，shecanbefendedoffnolonger。
\'LongbanishedRobinsonCrusoe，\'saysthecharmer，exchangingsalutations，\'howdidyouleavetheIsland?\'
\'Thankyou，\'saysLightwood。\'Itmadenocomplaintofbeinginpainanywhere。\'
\'Say，howdidyouleavethesavages?\'asksLadyTippins。
\'TheywerebecomingcivilizedwhenIleftJuanFernandez，\'saysLightwood。\'Atleasttheywereeatingoneanother，whichlookedlikeit。\'
\'Tormentor！\'returnsthedearyoungcreature。\'YouknowwhatI
mean，andyoutriflewithmyimpatience。Tellmesomething，immediately，aboutthemarriedpair。Youwereatthewedding。\'
\'WasI，by-the-by?\'Mortimerpretends，atgreatleisure，toconsider。
\'SoIwas！\'
\'Howwasthebridedressed?Inrowingcostume?\'
Mortimerlooksgloomy，anddeclinestoanswer。
\'Ihopeshesteeredherself，skiffedherself，paddledherself，larboardedandstarboardedherself，orwhateverthetechnicaltermmaybe，totheceremony?\'proceedstheplayfulTippins。
\'Howevershegottoit，shegracedit，\'saysMortimer。
LadyTippinswithaskittishlittlescream，attractsthegeneralattention。\'Gracedit！TakecareofmeifIfaint，Veneering。Hemeanstotellus，thatahorridfemalewatermanisgraceful！\'
\'Pardonme。Imeantotellyounothing，LadyTippins，\'repliesLightwood。Andkeepshiswordbyeatinghisdinnerwithashowoftheutmostindifference。
\'Youshallnotescapemeinthisway，youmorosebackwoodsman，\'retortsLadyTippins。\'Youshallnotevadethequestion，toscreenyourfriendEugene，whohasmadethisexhibitionofhimself。TheknowledgeshallbebroughthometoyouthatsucharidiculousaffairiscondemnedbythevoiceofSociety。MydearMrsVeneering，doletusresolveourselvesintoaCommitteeofthewholeHouseonthesubject。\'
MrsVeneering，alwayscharmedbythisrattlingsylph，cries。\'Ohyes！DoletusresolveourselvesintoaCommitteeofthewholeHouse！Sodelicious！\'Veneeringsays，\'Asmanyasareofthatopinion，sayAye，——contrary，No——theAyeshaveit。\'Butnobodytakestheslightestnoticeofhisjoke。
\'Now，IamChairwomanofCommittees！\'criesLadyTippins。
\'Whatspiritsshehas！\'exclaimsMrsVeneering；towhomlikewisenobodyattends。
\'Andthis，\'pursuesthesprightlyone，\'isaCommitteeofthewholeHousetowhat-you-may-call-it——elicit，Isuppose——thevoiceofSociety。ThequestionbeforetheCommitteeis，whetherayoungmanofveryfairfamily，goodappearance，andsometalent，makesafoolorawisemanofhimselfinmarryingafemalewaterman，turnedfactorygirl。\'
\'Hardlyso，Ithink，\'thestubbornMortimerstrikesin。\'Itakethequestiontobe，whethersuchamanasyoudescribe，LadyTippins，doesrightorwronginmarryingabravewomanIsaynothingofherbeauty，whohassavedhislife，withawonderfulenergyandaddress；whomheknowstobevirtuous，andpossessedofremarkablequalities；whomhehaslongadmired，andwhoisdeeplyattachedtohim。\'
\'But，excuseme，\'saysPodsnap，withhistemperandhisshirt-collaraboutequallyrumpled；\'wasthisyoungwomaneverafemalewaterman?\'
\'Never。Butshesometimesrowedinaboatwithherfather，I
believe。\'
Generalsensationagainsttheyoungwoman。Brewershakeshishead。Bootsshakeshishead。Buffershakeshishead。
\'Andnow，MrLightwood，wassheever，\'pursuesPodsnap，withhisindignationrisinghighintothosehair-brushesofhis，\'afactorygirl?\'
\'Never。Butshehadsomeemploymentinapapermill，Ibelieve。\'
Generalsensationrepeated。Brewersays，\'Ohdear！\'Bootssays，\'Ohdear！\'Buffersays，\'Ohdear！\'All，inarumblingtoneofprotest。
\'ThenallIhavetosayis，\'returnsPodsnap，puttingthethingawaywithhisrightarm，\'thatmygorgerisesagainstsuchamarriage——
thatitoffendsanddisgustsme——thatitmakesmesick——andthatI
desiretoknownomoreaboutit。\'
\'NowIwonder，\'thinksMortimer，amused，\'whetherYOUaretheVoiceofSociety！\'
\'Hear，hear，hear！\'criesLadyTippins。\'YouropinionofthisMESALLIANCE，honourablecolleaguesofthehonourablememberwhohasjustsatdown?\'
MrsPodsnapisofopinionthatinthesemattersthereshouldbeanequalityofstationandfortune，andthatamanaccustomedtoSocietyshouldlookoutforawomanaccustomedtoSocietyandcapableofbearingherpartinitwith——aneaseandeleganceofcarriage——that。\'MrsPodsnapstopsthere，delicatelyintimatingthateverysuchmanshouldlookoutforafinewomanasnearlyresemblingherselfashemayhopetodiscover。
\'NowIwonder，\'thinksMortimer，\'whetheryouaretheVoice！\'
LadyTippinsnextcanvassestheContractor，offivehundredthousandpower。Itappearstothispotentate，thatwhatthemaninquestionshouldhavedone，wouldhavebeen，tobuytheyoungwomanaboatandasmallannuity，andsetherupforherself。
Thesethingsareaquestionofbeefsteaksandporter。Youbuytheyoungwomanaboat。Verygood。Youbuyher，atthesametime，asmallannuity。Youspeakofthatannuityinpoundssterling，butitisinrealitysomanypoundsofbeefsteaksandsomanypintsofporter。Ontheonehand，theyoungwomanhastheboat。Ontheotherhand，sheconsumessomanypoundsofbeefsteaksandsomanypintsofporter。Thosebeefsteaksandthatporterarethefueltothatyoungwoman\'sengine。Shederivestherefromacertainamountofpowertorowtheboat；thatpowerwillproducesomuchmoney；youaddthattothesmallannuity；andthusyougetattheyoungwoman\'sincome。ThatitseemstotheContractoristhewayoflookingatit。
Thefairenslaverhavingfallenintooneofhergentlesleepsduringthelastexposition，nobodylikestowakeher。Fortunately，shecomesawakeofherself，andputsthequestiontotheWanderingChairman。TheWanderercanonlyspeakofthecaseasifitwerehisown。Ifsuchayoungwomanastheyoungwomandescribed，hadsavedhisownlife，hewouldhavebeenverymuchobligedtoher，wouldn\'thavemarriedher，andwouldhavegotheraberthinanElectricTelegraphOffice，whereyoungwomenanswerverywell。
WhatdoestheGeniusofthethreehundredandseventy-fivethousandpounds，noshillings，andnopence，think?Hecan\'tsaywhathethinks，withoutasking:Hadtheyoungwomananymoney?
\'No，\'saysLightwood，inanuncompromisingvoice；\'nomoney。\'
\'Madnessandmoonshine，\'isthenthecompressedverdictoftheGenius。\'Amanmaydoanythinglawful，formoney。Butfornomoney！——Bosh！\'
WhatdoesBootssay?
Bootssayshewouldn\'thavedoneitundertwentythousandpound。
WhatdoesBrewersay?
BrewersayswhatBootssays。
WhatdoesBuffersay?
Buffersaysheknowsamanwhomarriedabathing-woman，andbolted。
LadyTippinsfanciesshehascollectedthesuffragesofthewholeCommitteenobodydreamingofaskingtheVeneeringsfortheiropinion，when，lookingroundthetablethroughhereyeglass，sheperceivesMrTwemlowwithhishandtohisforehead。
Goodgracious！MyTwemlowforgotten！Mydearest！Myown！
Whatishisvote?
Twemlowhastheairofbeingillatease，ashetakeshishandfromhisforeheadandreplies。
\'Iamdisposedtothink，\'sayshe，\'thatthisisaquestionofthefeelingsofagentleman。\'
\'Agentlemancanhavenofeelingswhocontractssuchamarriage，\'
flushesPodsnap。
\'Pardonme，sir，\'saysTwemlow，ratherlessmildlythanusual，\'I
don\'tagreewithyou。Ifthisgentleman\'sfeelingsofgratitude，ofrespect，ofadmiration，andaffection，inducedhimasIpresumetheydidtomarrythislady——\'
\'Thislady！\'echoesPodsnap。
\'Sir，\'returnsTwemlow，withhiswristbandsbristlingalittle，\'YOU
repeattheword；Irepeattheword。Thislady。Whatelsewouldyoucallher，ifthegentlemanwerepresent?\'
ThisbeingsomethinginthenatureofaposerforPodsnap，hemerelywavesitawaywithaspeechlesswave。
\'Isay，\'resumesTwemlow，\'ifsuchfeelingsonthepartofthisgentleman，inducedthisgentlemantomarrythislady，Ithinkheisthegreatergentlemanfortheaction，andmakesherthegreaterlady。Ibegtosay，thatwhenIusetheword，gentleman，Iuseitinthesenseinwhichthedegreemaybeattainedbyanyman。ThefeelingsofagentlemanIholdsacred，andIconfessIamnotcomfortablewhentheyaremadethesubjectofsportorgeneraldiscussion。\'
\'Ishouldliketoknow，\'sneersPodsnap，\'whetheryournoblerelationwouldbeofyouropinion。\'
\'MrPodsnap，\'retortsTwemlow，\'permitme。Hemightbe，orhemightnotbe。Icannotsay。But，Icouldnotallowevenhimtodictatetomeonapointofgreatdelicacy，onwhichIfeelverystrongly。\'
Somehow，acanopyofwetblanketseemstodescenduponthecompany，andLadyTippinswasneverknowntoturnsoverygreedyorsoverycross。MortimerLightwoodalonebrightens。
Hehasbeenaskinghimself，astoeveryothermemberoftheCommitteeinturn，\'IwonderwhetheryouaretheVoice！\'ButhedoesnotaskhimselfthequestionafterTwemlowhasspoken，andheglancesinTwemlow\'sdirectionasifheweregrateful。Whenthecompanydisperse——bywhichtimeMrandMrsVeneeringhavehadquiteasmuchastheywantofthehonour，andtheguestshavehadquiteasmuchasTHEYwantoftheotherhonour——MortimerseesTwemlowhome，shakeshandswithhimcordiallyatparting，andfarestotheTemple，gaily。