第6章
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  AlthoughIwaslookingatBiddyasIspoke,andalthoughsheopenedhereyesverywidewhenIhadspoken,shedidnotlookatme。

  `Oh,hismanners!won\'thismannersdo,then?\'askedBiddy,pluckingablack-currantleaf。

  `MydearBiddy,theydoverywellhere——\'

  `Oh!theydoverywellhere?\'interruptedBiddy,lookingcloselyattheleafinherhand。

  `Hearmeout-butifIweretoremoveJoeintoahighersphere,asIshallhopetoremovehimwhenIfullycomeintomyproperty,theywouldhardlydohimjustice。\'

  `Anddon\'tyouthinkheknowsthat?\'askedBiddy。

  Itwassuchaveryprovokingquestionforithadneverinthemostdistantmanneroccurredtome,thatIsaid,snappishly,`Biddy,whatdoyoumean?\'

  Biddyhavingrubbedtheleaftopiecesbetweenherhands-andthesmellofablack-currantbushhaseversincerecalledtomethateveninginthelittlegardenbythesideofthelane-said,`Haveyouneverconsideredthathemaybeproud?\'

  `Proud?\'Irepeated,withdisdainfulemphasis。

  `Oh!therearemanykindsofpride,\'saidBiddy,lookingfullatmeandshakingherhead;`prideisnotallofonekind——\'

  `Well?Whatareyoustoppingfor?\'saidI。

  `Notallofonekind,\'resumedBiddy。`Hemaybetooproudtoletanyonetakehimoutofaplacethatheiscompetenttofill,andfillswellandwithrespect。Totellyouthetruth,Ithinkheis:thoughitsoundsboldinmetosayso,foryoumustknowhimfarbetterthanIdo。\'

  `Now,Biddy,\'saidI,`Iamverysorrytoseethisinyou。Ididnotexpecttoseethisinyou。Youareenvious,Biddy,andgrudging。Youaredissatisfiedonaccountofmyriseinfortune,andyoucan\'thelpshowingit。\'

  `Ifyouhavethehearttothinkso,\'returnedBiddy,`sayso。Saysooverandoveragain,ifyouhavethehearttothinkso。\'

  `Ifyouhavethehearttobeso,youmean,Biddy,\'saidI,inavirtuousandsuperiortone;`don\'tputitoffuponme。Iamverysorrytoseeit,andit\'sa-it\'sabadsideofhumannature。IdidintendtoaskyoutouseanylittleopportunitiesyoumighthaveafterIwasgone,ofimprovingdearJoe。Butafterthis,Iaskyounothing。Iamextremelysorrytoseethisinyou,Biddy,\'Irepeated。`It\'sa-it\'sabadsideofhumannature。\'

  `Whetheryouscoldmeorapproveofme,\'returnedpoorBiddy,`youmayequallydependuponmytryingtodoallthatliesinmypower,here,atalltimes。Andwhateveropinionyoutakeawayofme,shallmakenodifferenceinmyremembranceofyou。Yetagentlemanshouldnotbeunjustneither,\'

  saidBiddy,turningawayherhead。

  Iagainwarmlyrepeatedthatitwasabadsideofhumannatureinwhichsentiment,waivingitsapplication,IhavesinceseenreasontothinkI

  wasright,andIwalkeddownthelittlepathawayfromBiddy,andBiddywentintothehouse,andIwentoutatthegardengateandtookadejectedstrolluntilsupper-time;againfeelingitverysorrowfulandstrangethatthis,thesecondnightofmybrightfortunes,shouldbeaslonelyandunsatisfactoryasthefirst。

  But,morningoncemorebrightenedmyview,andIextendedmyclemencytoBiddy,andwedroppedthesubject。PuttingonthebestclothesIhad,IwentintotownasearlyasIcouldhopetofindtheshopsopen,andpresentedmyselfbeforeMrTrabb,thetailor:whowashavinghisbreakfastintheparlourbehindhisshop,andwhodidnotthinkitworthhiswhiletocomeouttome,butcalledmeintohim。

  `Well!\'saidMrTrabb,inahail-fellow-well-metkindofway。`Howareyou,andwhatcanIdoforyou?\'

  MrTrabbhadslicedhishotrollintothreefeatherbeds,andwasslippingbutterinbetweentheblankets,andcoveringitup。Hewasaprosperousoldbachelor,andhisopenwindowlookedintoaprosperouslittlegardenandorchard,andtherewasaprosperousironsafeletintothewallatthesideofhisfireplace,andIdidnotdoubtthatheapsofhisprosperitywereputawayinitinbags。

  `MrTrabb,\'saidI,`it\'sanunpleasantthingtohavetomention,becauseitlookslikeboasting;butIhavecomeintoahandsomeproperty。\'

  AchangepassedoverMrTrabb。Heforgotthebutterinbed,gotupfromthebedside,andwipedhisfingersonthetable-cloth,exclaiming,`Lordblessmysoul!\'

  `IamgoinguptomyguardianinLondon,\'saidI,casuallydrawingsomeguineasoutofmypocketandlookingatthem;`andIwantafashionablesuitofclothestogoin。Iwishtopayforthem,\'Iadded-otherwiseIthoughthemightonlypretendtomakethem-`withreadymoney。\'

  `Mydearsir,\'saidMrTrabb,asherespectfullybenthisbody,openedhisarms,andtookthelibertyoftouchingmeontheoutsideofeachelbow,`don\'thurtmebymentioningthat。MayIventuretocongratulateyou?Wouldyoudomethefavourofsteppingintotheshop?\'

  MrTrabb\'sboywasthemostaudaciousboyinallthatcountryside。WhenIhadenteredhewassweepingtheshop,andhehadsweetenedhislaboursbysweepingoverme。HewasstillsweepingwhenIcameoutintotheshopwithMrTrabb,andheknockedthebroomagainstallpossiblecornersandobstacles,toexpressasIunderstooditequalitywithanyblacksmith,aliveordead。

  `Holdthatnoise,\'saidMrTrabb,withthegreateststernness,`orI\'llknockyourheadoff!Domethefavourtobeseated,sir。Now,this,\'saidMrTrabb,takingdownarollofcloth,andtidingitoutinaflowingmanneroverthecounter,preparatorytogettinghishandunderittoshowthegloss,`isaverysweetarticle。Icanrecommenditforyourpurpose,sir,becauseitreallyisextrasuper。Butyoushallseesomeothers。GivemeNumberFour,you!\'Totheboy,andwithadreadfullyseverestare:foreseeingthedangerofthatmiscreant\'sbrushingmewithit,ormakingsomeothersignoffamiliarity。

  MrTrabbneverremovedhissterneyefromtheboyuntilhehaddepositednumberfouronthecounterandwasatasafedistanceagain。Then,hecommandedhimtobringnumberfive,andnumbereight。`Andletmehavenoneofyourtrickshere,\'saidMrTrabb,`oryoushallrepentit,youyoungscoundrel,thelongestdayyouhavetolive。\'

  MrTrabbthenbentovernumberfour,andinasortofdeferentialconfidencerecommendedittomeasalightarticleforsummerwear,anarticlemuchinvogueamongthenobilityandgentry,andarticlethatitwouldeverbeanhonourtohimtoreflectuponadistinguishedfellow-townsman\'sifhemightclaimmeforafellowtownsmanhavingworn。`Areyoubringingnumbersfiveandeight,youvagabond,\'saidMrTrabbtotheboyafterthat,`orshallIkickyououtoftheshopandbringthemmyself?\'

  Iselectedthematerialsforasuit,withtheassistanceofMrTrabb\'sjudgment,andre-enteredtheparlourtobemeasured。For,althoughMrTrabbhadmymeasurealready,andhadpreviouslybeenquitecontentedwithit,hesaidapologeticallythatit`wouldn\'tdounderexistingcircumstances,sir-wouldn\'tdoatall。\'So,MrTrabbmeasuredandcalculatedme,intheparlour,asifIwereanestateandhethefinestspeciesofsurveyor,andgavehimselfsuchaworldoftroublethatIfeltthatnosuitofclothescouldpossiblyremuneratehimforhispains。WhenhehadatlastdoneandhadappointedtosendthearticlestoMrPumblechook\'sontheThursdayevening,hesaid,withhishandupontheparlourlock,`Iknow,sir,thatLondongentlemencannotbeexpectedtopatronizelocalwork,asarule;

  butifyouwouldgivemeaturnnowandtheninthequalityofatownsman,Ishouldgreatlyesteemit。Goodmorning,sir,muchobliged-Door!\'

  Thelastwordwasflungattheboy,whohadnottheleastnotionwhatitmeant。ButIsawhimcollapseashismasterrubbedmeoutwithhishands,andmyfirstdecidedexperienceofthestupendouspowerofmoney,was,thatithadmorallylaiduponhisback,Trabb\'sboy。

  Afterthismemorableevent,Iwenttothehatter\'s,andthebootmaker\'s,andthehosier\'s,andfeltratherlikeMotherHubbard\'sdogwhoseoutfitrequiredtheservicesofsomanytrades。Ialsowenttothecoach-officeandtookmyplaceforseveno\'clockonSaturdaymorning。ItwasnotnecessarytoexplaineverywherethatIhadcomeintoahandsomeproperty;butwheneverIsaidanythingtothateffect,itfollowedthattheofficiatingtradesmanceasedtohavehisattentiondivertedthroughthewindowbytheHigh-street,andconcentratedhisminduponme。WhenIhadorderedeverythingIwanted,IdirectedmystepstowardsPumblechook\'s,and,asIapproachedthatgentleman\'splaceofbusiness,Isawhimstandingathisdoor。

  Hewaswaitingformewithgreatimpatience。Hehadbeenoutearlywiththechaise-cart,andhadcalledattheforgeandheardthenews。HehadpreparedacollationformeintheBarnwellparlour,andhetooorderedhisshopmanto`comeoutofthegangway\'asmysacredpersonpassed。

  `Mydearfriend,\'saidMrPumblechook,takingmebybothhands,whenheandIandthecollationwerealone,`Igiveyoujoyofyourgoodfortune。

  Welldeserved,welldeserved!\'

  Thiswascomingtothepoint,andIthoughtitasensiblewayofexpressinghimself。

  `Tothink,\'saidMrPumblechook,aftersnortingadmirationatmeforsomemoments,`thatIshouldhavebeenthehumbleinstrumentofleadinguptothis,isaproudreward。\'

  IbeggedMrPumblechooktorememberthatnothingwastobeeversaidorhinted,onthatpoint。

  `Mydearyoungfriend,\'saidMrPumblechook,`ifyouwillallowmetocallyouso——\'

  Imurmured`Certainly,\'andMrPumblechooktookmebybothhandsagain,andcommunicatedamovementtohiswaistcoat,whichhadanemotionalappearance,thoughitwasratherlowdown,`Mydearyoungfriend,relyuponmydoingmylittleallinyourabsence,bykeepingthefactbeforethemindofJoseph-

  Joseph!\'saidMrPumblechook,inthewayofacompassionateadjuration。

  `Joseph!!Joseph!!!\'Thereuponheshookhisheadandtappedit,expressinghissenseofdeficiencyinJoseph。

  `Butmydearyoungfriend,\'saidMrPumblechook,`youmustbehungry,youmustbeexhausted。Beseated。HereisachickenhadroundfromtheBoar,hereisatonguehadroundfromtheBoar,here\'soneortwolittlethingshadroundfromtheBoar,thatIhopeyoumaynotdespise。ButdoI,\'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagainthemomentafterhehadsatdown,`seeaforeme,himasIeversportedwithinhistimesofhappyinfancy?

  AndmayI-mayI-?\'

  ThisMayI,meantmightheshakehands?Iconsented,andhewasfervent,andthensatdownagain。

  `Hereiswine,\'saidMrPumblechook。`Letusdrink,ThankstoFortune,andmaysheeverpickoutherfavouriteswithequaljudgment!AndyetI

  cannot,\'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagain,`seeaforemeOne-andlikewisedrinktoOne-withoutagainexpressing-MayI-mayI-?\'

  Isaidhemight,andheshookhandswithmeagain,andemptiedhisglassandturneditupsidedown。Ididthesame;andifIhadturnedmyselfupsidedownbeforedrinking,thewinecouldnothavegonemoredirecttomyhead。

  MrPumblechookhelpedmetotheliverwing,andtothebestsliceoftonguenoneofthoseout-of-the-wayNoThoroughfaresofPorknow,andtook,comparativelyspeaking,nocareofhimselfatall。`Ah!poultry,poultry!Youlittlethought,\'saidMrPumblechook,apostrophizingthefowlinthedish,`whenyouwasayoungfledgling,whatwasinstoreforyou。

  Youlittlethoughtyouwastoberefreshmentbeneaththishumbleroofforoneas-Callitaweakness,ifyouwill,\'saidMrPumblechook,gettingupagain,`butmayI?mayI-?\'

  Itbegantobeunnecessarytorepeattheformofsayinghemight,sohediditatonce。Howheeverdiditsooftenwithoutwoundinghimselfwithmyknife,Idon\'tknow。

  `Andyoursister,\'heresumed,afteralittlesteadyeating,`whichhadthehonourofbringingyouupbyhand!It\'sasadpicter,toreflectthatshe\'snolongerequaltofullyunderstandingthehonour。May——\'

  Isawhewasabouttocomeatmeagain,andIstoppedhim。

  `We\'lldrinkherhealth,\'saidI。

  `Ah!\'criedMrPumblechook,leaningbackinhischair,quiteflaccidwithadmiration,`that\'sthewayyouknow\'em,sir!\'Idon\'tknowwhoSirwas,buthecertainlywasnotI,andtherewasnothirdpersonpresent;

  `that\'sthewayyouknowthenobleminded,sir!Everforgivingandeveraffable。Itmight,\'saidtheservilePumblechook,puttingdownhisuntastedglassinahurryandgettingupagain,`toacommonperson,havetheappearanceofrepeating-butmayI-?\'

  Whenhehaddoneit,heresumedhisseatanddranktomysister。`Letusneverbeblind,\'saidMrPumblechook,`toherfaultsoftemper,butitistobehopedshemeantwell。\'

  Ataboutthistime,Ibegantoobservethathewasgettingflushedintheface;astomyself,Ifeltallface,steepedinwineandsmarting。

  ImentionedtoMrPumblechookthatIwishedtohavemynewclothessenttohishouse,andhewasecstaticonmysodistinguishinghim。Imentionedmyreasonfordesiringtoavoidobservationinthevillage,andhelaudedittotheskies。Therewasnobodybuthimself,heintimated,worthyofmyconfidence,and-inshort,mighthe?ThenheaskedmetenderlyifI

  rememberedourboyishgamesatsums,andhowwehadgonetogethertohavemeboundapprentice,and,ineffect,howhehadeverbeenmyfavouritefancyandmychosenfriend?IfIhadtakententimesasmanyglassesofwineasIhad,Ishouldhaveknownthatheneverhadstoodinthatrelationtowardsme,andshouldinmyheartofheartshaverepudiatedtheidea。

  Yetforallthat,IrememberfeelingconvincedthatIhadbeenmuchmistakeninhim,andthathewasasensiblepracticalgood-heartedprimefellow。

  Bydegreeshefelltoreposingsuchgreatconfidenceinme,astoaskmyadviceinreferencetohisownaffairs。Hementionedthattherewasanopportunityforagreatamalgamationandmonopolyofthecornandseedtradeonthosepremises,ifenlarged,suchashadneveroccurredbeforeinthat,oranyotherneighbourhood。Whatalonewaswantingtotherealizationofavastfortune,heconsideredtobeMoreCapital。Thosewerethetwolittlewords,morecapital。NowitappearedtohimPumblechookthatifthatcapitalweregotintothebusiness,throughasleepingpartner,sir-whichsleepingpartnerwouldhavenothingtodobutwalkin,byselfordeputy,wheneverhepleased,andexaminethebooks-andwalkintwiceayearandtakehisprofitsawayinhispocket,tothetuneoffiftypercent-itappearedtohimthatthatmightbeanopeningforayounggentlemanofspiritcombinedwithproperty,whichwouldbeworthyofhisattention。

  ButwhatdidIthink?Hehadgreatconfidenceinmyopinion,andwhatdidIthink?Igaveitasmyopinion。`Waitabit!\'Theunitedvastnessanddistinctnessofthisviewsostruckhim,thathenolongeraskedifhemightshakehandswithme,butsaidhereallymust-anddid。

  Wedrankallthewine,andMrPumblechookpledgedhimselfoverandoveragaintokeepJosephuptothemarkIdon\'tknowwhatmark,andtorendermeefficientandconstantserviceIdon\'tknowwhatservice。Healsomadeknowntomeforthefirsttimeinmylife,andcertainlyafterhavingkepthissecretwonderfullywell,thathehadalwayssaidofme,`Thatboyisnocommonboy,andmarkme,hisfortun\'willbenocommonfortun\'。\'

  Hesaidwithatearfulsmilethatitwasasingularthingtothinkofnow,andIsaidsotoo。Finally,Iwentoutintotheair,withadimperceptionthattherewassomethingunwontedintheconductofthesunshine,andfoundthatIhadslumberouslygottotheturn-pikewithouthavingtakenanyaccountoftheroad。

  There,IwasrousedbyMrPumblechook\'shailingme。Hewasalongwaydownthesunnystreet,andwasmakingexpressivegesturesformetostop。

  Istopped,andhecameupbreathless。

  `No,mydearfriend,\'saidhe,whenhehadrecoveredwindforspeech。

  `NotifIcanhelpit。Thisoccasionshallnotentirelypasswithoutthataffabilityonyourpart-MayI,asanoldfriendandwell-wisher?MayI?\'

  Weshookhandsforthehundredthtimeatleast,andheorderedayoungcarteroutofmywaywiththegreatestindignation。Then,heblessedmeandstoodwavinghishandtomeuntilIhadpassedthecrookintheroad;

  andthenIturnedintoafieldandhadalongnapunderahedgebeforeIpursuedmywayhome。

  IhadscantluggagetotakewithmetoLondon,forlittleofthelittleIpossessedwasadaptedtomynewstation。But,Ibeganpackingthatsameafternoon,andwildlypackedupthingsthatIknewIshouldwantnextmorning,inafictionthattherewasnotamomenttobelost。

  So,Tuesday,Wednesday,andThursday,passed;andonFridaymorningIwenttoMrPumblechook\'s,toputonmynewclothesandpaymyvisittoMissHavisham。MrPumblechook\'sownroomwasgivenuptometodressin,andwasdecoratedwithcleantowelsexpresslyfortheevent。Myclotheswereratheradisappointment,ofcourse。Probablyeverynewandeagerlyexpectedgarmenteverputonsinceclothescamein,fellatrifleshortofthewearer\'sexpectation。ButafterIhadhadmynewsuiton,somehalfanhour,andhadgonethroughanimmensityofposturingwithMrPumblechook\'sverylimiteddressing-glass,inthefutileendeavourtoseemylegs,itseemedtofitmebetter。Itbeingmarketmorningataneighbouringtownsometenmilesoff,MrPumblechookwasnotathome。IhadnottoldhimexactlywhenImeanttoleave,andwasnotlikelytoshakehandswithhimagainbeforedeparting。Thiswasallasitshouldbe,andIwentoutinmynewarray:fearfullyashamedofhavingtopasstheshopman,andsuspiciousafterallthatIwasatapersonaldisadvantage,somethinglikeJoe\'sinhisSundaysuit。

  IwentcircuitouslytoMissHavisham\'sbyallthebackways,andrangatthebellconstrainedly,onaccountofthestifflongfingersofmygloves。

  SarahPocketcametothegate,andpositivelyreeledbackwhenshesawmesochanged;herwalnut-shellcountenancelikewise,turnedfrombrowntogreenandyellow。

  `You?\'saidshe。`You,goodgracious!Whatdoyouwant?\'

  `IamgoingtoLondon,MissPocket,\'saidI,`andwanttosaygood-byetoMissHavisham。\'

  Iwasnotexpected,forsheleftmelockedintheyard,whileshewenttoaskifIweretobeadmitted。Afteraveryshortdelay,shereturnedandtookmeup,staringatmealltheway。

  MissHavishamwastakingexerciseintheroomwiththelongspreadtable,leaningonhercrutchstick。Theroomwaslightedasofyore,andatthesoundofourentrance,shestoppedandturned。Shewasthenjustabreastoftherottedbride-cake。

  `Don\'tgo,Sarah,\'shesaid。`Well,Pip?\'

  `IstartforLondon,MissHavisham,to-morrow,\'IwasexceedinglycarefulwhatIsaid,`andIthoughtyouwouldkindlynotmindmytakingleaveofyou。\'

  `Thisisagayfigure,Pip,\'saidshe,makinghercrutchstickplayroundme,asifshe,thefairygodmotherwhohadchangedme,werebestowingthefinishinggift。

  `IhavecomeintosuchgoodfortunesinceIsawyoulast,MissHavisham,\'

  Imurmured。`AndIamsogratefulforit,MissHavisham!\'

  `Ay,ay!\'saidshe,lookingatthediscomfitedandenviousSarah,withdelight。`IhaveseenMrJaggers。Ihaveheardaboutit,Pip。Soyougoto-morrow?\'

  `Yes,MissHavisham。\'

  `Andyouareadoptedbyarichperson?\'

  `Yes,MissHavisham。\'

  `Notnamed?\'

  `No,MissHavisham。\'

  `AndMrJaggersismadeyourguardian?\'

  `Yes,MissHavisham。\'

  Shequitegloatedonthesequestionsandanswers,sokeenwasherenjoymentofSarahPocket\'sjealousdismay。`Well!\'shewenton;`youhaveapromisingcareerbeforeyou。Begood-deserveit-andabidebyMrJaggers\'sinstructions。\'

  Shelookedatme,andlookedatSarah,andSarah\'scountenancewrungoutofherwatchfulfaceacruelsmile。`Good-bye,Pip!-youwillalwayskeepthenameofPip,youknow。\'

  `Yes,MissHavisham。\'

  `Good-bye,Pip!\'

  Shestretchedoutherhand,andIwentdownonmykneeandputittomylips。IhadnotconsideredhowIshouldtakeleaveofher;itcamenaturallytomeatthemoment,todothis。ShelookedatSarahPocketwithtriumphinherweirdeyes,andsoIleftmyfairygodmother,withbothherhandsonhercrutchstick,standinginthemidstofthedimlylightedroombesidetherottenbridecakethatwashiddenincobwebs。

  SarahPocketconductedmedown,asifIwereaghostwhomustbeseenout。Shecouldnotgetovermyappearance,andwasinthelastdegreeconfounded。

  Isaid`Good-bye,MissPocket;\'butshemerelystared,anddidnotseemcollectedenoughtoknowthatIhadspoken。Clearofthehouse,ImadethebestofmywaybacktoPumblechook\'s,tookoffmynewclothes,madethemintoabundle,andwentbackhomeinmyolderdress,carryingit-

  tospeakthetruth-muchmoreatmyeasetoo,thoughIhadthebundletocarry。

  Andnow,thosesixdayswhichweretohaverunoutsoslowly,hadrunoutfastandweregone,andto-morrowlookedmeinthefacemoresteadilythanIcouldlookatit。Asthesixeveningshaddwindledaway,tofive,tofour,tothree,totwo,IhadbecomemoreandmoreappreciativeofthesocietyofJoeandBiddy。Onthislastevening,Idressedmyselfoutinmynewclothes,fortheirdelight,andsatinmysplendouruntilbedtime。

  Wehadahotsupperontheoccasion,gracedbytheinevitableroastfowl,andwehadsomefliptofinishwith。Wewereallverylow,andnonethehigherforpretendingtobeinspirits。

  Iwastoleaveourvillageatfiveinthemorning,carryingmylittlehand-portmanteau,andIhadtoldJoethatIwishedtowalkawayallalone。

  Iamafraid-soreafraid-thatthispurposeoriginatedinmysenseofthecontrasttherewouldbebetweenmeandJoe,ifwewenttothecoachtogether。Ihadpretendedwithmyselfthattherewasnothingofthistaintinthearrangement;butwhenIwentuptomylittleroomonthislastnight,Ifeltcompelledtoadmitthatitmightbeso,andhadanimpulseuponmetogodownagainandentreatJoetowalkwithmeinthemorning。Ididnot。

  Allnighttherewerecoachesinmybrokensleep,goingtowrongplacesinsteadoftoLondon,andhavinginthetraces,nowdogs,nowcats,nowpigs,nowmen-neverhorses。Fantasticfailuresofjourneysoccupiedmeuntilthedaydawnedandthebirdsweresinging。Then,Igotupandpartlydressed,andsatatthewindowtotakealastlookout,andintakingitfellasleep。

  Biddywasastirsoearlytogetmybreakfast,that,althoughIdidnotsleepatthewindowanhour,IsmeltthesmokeofthekitchenfirewhenIstartedupwithaterribleideathatitmustbelateintheafternoon。

  Butlongafterthat,andlongafterIhadheardtheclinkingoftheteacupsandwasquiteready,Iwantedtheresolutiontogodownstairs。Afterall,Iremainedupthere,repeatedlyunlockingandunstrappingmysmallportmanteauandlockingandstrappingitupagain,untilBiddycalledtomethatI

  waslate。

  Itwasahurriedbreakfastwithnotasteinit。Igotupfromthemeal,sayingwithasortofbriskness,asifithadonlyjustoccurredtome,`Well!IsupposeImustbeoff!\'andthenIkissedmysisterwhowaslaughingandnoddingandshakinginherusualchair,andkissedBiddy,andthrewmyarmsaroundJoe\'sneck。ThenItookupmylittleportmanteauandwalkedout。ThelastIsawofthemwas,whenIpresentlyheardascufflebehindme,andlookingback,sawJoethrowinganoldshoeaftermeandBiddythrowinganotheroldshoe。Istoppedthen,towavemyhat,anddearoldJoewavedhisstrongrightarmabovehishead,cryinghuskily`Hooroar!\'andBiddyputheraprontoherface。

  Iwalkedawayatagoodpace,thinkingitwaseasiertogothanIhadsupposeditwouldbe,andreflectingthatitwouldneverhavedonetohavehadanoldshoethrownafterthecoach,insightofalltheHigh-street。

  Iwhistledandmadenothingofgoing。Butthevillagewasverypeacefulandquiet,andthelightmistsweresolemnlyrising,asiftoshowmetheworld,andIhadbeensoinnocentandlittlethere,andallbeyondwassounknownandgreat,thatinamomentwithastrongheaveandsobIbrokeintotears。Itwasbythefinger-postattheendofthevillage,andI

  laidmyhanduponit,andsaid,`Good-byeOmydear,dearfriend!\'

  Heavenknowsweneedneverbeashamedofourtears,fortheyarerainupontheblindingdustofearth,overlyingourhardhearts。IwasbetterafterIhadcried,thanbefore-moresorry,moreawareofmyowningratitude,moregentle。IfIhadcriedbefore,IshouldhavehadJoewithmethen。

  SosubduedIwasbythosetears,andbytheirbreakingoutagaininthecourseofthequietwalk,thatwhenIwasonthecoach,anditwasclearofthetown,IdeliberatedwithanachingheartwhetherIwouldnotgetdownwhenwechangedhorsesandwalkback,andhaveanothereveningathome,andabetterparting。Wechanged,andIhadnotmadeupmymind,andstillreflectedformycomfortthatitwouldbequitepracticabletogetdownandwalkback,whenwechangedagain。AndwhileIwasoccupiedwiththesedeliberations,IwouldfancyanexactresemblancetoJoeinsomemancomingalongtheroadtowardsus,andmyheartwouldbeathigh-

  Asifhecouldpossiblybethere!

  Wechangedagain,andyetagain,anditwasnowtoolateandtoofartogoback,andIwenton。Andthemistshadallsolemnlyrisennow,andtheworldlayspreadbeforeme。

  THISISTHEENDOFTHEFIRSTSTAGEOFPIP\'SEXPECTATIONS。

  Chapter20

  THEjourneyfromourtowntothemetropolis,wasajourneyofaboutfivehours。Itwasalittlepastmid-daywhenthefourhorsestage-coachbywhichIwasapassenger,gotintotheraveloftrafficfrayedoutabouttheCrossKeys,Wood-street,Cheapside,London。

  WeBritonshadatthattimeparticularlysettledthatitwastreasonabletodoubtourhavingandourbeingthebestofeverything:otherwise,whileIwasscaredbytheimmensityofLondon,IthinkImighthavehadsomefaintdoubtswhetheritwasnotratherugly,crooked,narrow,anddirty。

  MrJaggershaddulysentmehisaddress;itwas,LittleBritain,andhehadwrittenafteritonhiscard,`justoutofSmithfield,andclosebythecoach-office。\'Nevertheless,ahackney-coachman,whoseemedtohaveasmanycapestohisgreasygreat-coatashewasyearsold,packedmeupinhiscoachandhemmedmeinwithafoldingandjinglingbarrierofsteps,asifheweregoingtotakemefiftymiles。Hisgettingonhisbox,whichIremembertohavebeendecoratedwithanoldweather-stainedpea-greenhammerclothmoth-eatenintorags,wasquiteaworkoftime。Itwasawonderfulequipage,withsixgreatcoronetsoutside,andraggedthingsbehindforIdon\'tknowhowmanyfootmentoholdonby,andaharrowbelowthem,topreventamateurfootmenfromyieldingtothetemptation。

  Ihadscarcelyhadtimetoenjoythecoachandtothinkhowlikeastraw-yarditwas,andyethowlikearag-shop,andtowonderwhythehorses\'nose-bagswerekeptinside,whenIobservedthecoachmanbeginningtogetdown,asifweweregoingtostoppresently。Andstopwepresentlydid,inagloomystreet,atcertainofficeswithanopendoor,whereonwaspaintedMR。JAGGERS。

  `Howmuch?\'Iaskedthecoachman。

  Thecoachmananswered,`Ashilling-unlessyouwishtomakeitmore。\'

  InaturallysaidIhadnowishtomakeitmore。

  `Thenitmustbeashilling,\'observedthecoachman。`Idon\'twanttogetintotrouble。Iknowhim!\'HedarklyclosedaneyeatMrJaggers\'sname,andshookhishead。

  Whenhehadgothisshilling,andhadincourseoftimecompletedtheascenttohisbox,andhadgotawaywhichappearedtorelievehismind,Iwentintothefrontofficewithmylittleportmanteauinmyhandandasked,WasMrJaggersathome?

  `Heisnot,\'returnedtheclerk。`HeisinCourtatpresent。AmIaddressingMrPip?\'

  IsignifiedthathewasaddressingMrPip。

  `MrJaggersleftwordwouldyouwaitinhisroom。Hecouldn\'tsayhowlonghemightbe,havingacaseon。Butitstandstoreason,histimebeingvaluable,thathewon\'tbelongerthanhecanhelp。\'

  Withthosewords,theclerkopenedadoor,andusheredmeintoaninnerchamberattheback。Here,wefoundagentlemanwithoneeye,inavelveteensuitandknee-breeches,whowipedhisnosewithhissleeveonbeinginterruptedintheperusalofthenewspaper。

  `Goandwaitoutside,Mike,\'saidtheclerk。

  IbegantosaythatIhopedIwasnotinterrupting-whentheclerkshovedthisgentlemanoutwithaslittleceremonyasIeversawused,andtossinghisfurcapoutafterhim,leftmealone。

  MrJaggers\'sroomwaslightedbyaskylightonly,andwasamostdismalplace;theskylight,eccentricallypatchedlikeabrokenhead,andthedistortedadjoininghouseslookingasiftheyhadtwistedthemselvestopeepdownatmethroughit。Therewerenotsomanypapersabout,asIshouldhaveexpectedtosee;andthereweresomeoddobjectsabout,thatIshouldnothaveexpectedtosee-suchasanoldrustypistol,aswordinascabbard,severalstrange-lookingboxesandpackages,andtwodreadfulcastsonashelf,offacespeculiarlyswollen,andtwitchyaboutthenose。MrJaggers\'sownhigh-backedchairwasofdeadlyblackhorse-hair,withrowsofbrassnailsroundit,likeacoffin;andIfanciedIcouldseehowheleanedbackinit,andbithisforefingerattheclients。Theroomwasbutsmall,andtheclientsseemedtohavehadahabitofbackingupagainstthewall:

  thewall,especiallyoppositetoMrJaggers\'schair,beinggreasywithshoulders。Irecalled,too,thattheone-eyedgentlemanhadshuffledforthagainstthewallwhenIwastheinnocentcauseofhisbeingturnedout。

  IsatdownintheclientalchairplacedoveragainstMrJaggers\'schair,andbecamefascinatedbythedismalatmosphereoftheplace。Icalledtomindthattheclerkhadthesameairofknowingsomethingtoeverybodyelse\'sdisadvantage,ashismasterhad。Iwonderedhowmanyotherclerkstherewereup-stairs,andwhethertheyallclaimedtohavethesamedetrimentalmasteryoftheirfellow-creatures。Iwonderedwhatwasthehistoryofalltheoddlitterabouttheroom,andhowitcamethere。IwonderedwhetherthetwoswollenfaceswereofMrJaggers\'sfamily,and,ifheweresounfortunateastohavehadapairofsuchill-lookingrelations,whyhestuckthemonthatdustyperchfortheblacksandfliestosettleon,insteadofgivingthemaplaceathome。OfcourseIhadnoexperienceofaLondonsummerday,andmyspiritsmayhavebeenoppressedbythehotexhaustedair,andbythedustandgritthatlaythickoneverything。ButIsatwonderingandwaitinginMrJaggers\'scloseroom,untilIreallycouldnotbearthetwocastsontheshelfaboveMrJaggers\'schair,andgotupandwentout。

  WhenItoldtheclerkthatIwouldtakeaturnintheairwhileIwaited,headvisedmetogoroundthecornerandIshouldcomeintoSmithfield。

  So,IcameintoSmithfield;andtheshamefulplace,beingallasmearwithfilthandfatandbloodandfoam,seemedtosticktome。So,IrubbeditoffwithallpossiblespeedbyturningintoastreetwhereIsawthegreatblackdomeofSaintPaul\'sbulgingatmefrombehindagrimstonebuildingwhichabystandersaidwasNewgatePrison。Followingthewallofthejail,Ifoundtheroadwaycoveredwithstrawtodeadenthenoiseofpassingvehicles;

  andfromthis,andfromthequantityofpeoplestandingabout,smellingstronglyofspiritsandbeer,Iinferredthatthetrialswereon。

  WhileIlookedaboutmehere,anexceedinglydirtyandpartiallydrunkministerofjusticeaskedmeifIwouldliketostepinandhearatrialorso:informingmethathecouldgivemeafrontplaceforhalf-a-crown,whenceIshouldcommandafullviewoftheLordChiefJusticeinhiswigandrobes-mentioningthatawfulpersonagelikewaxwork,andpresentlyofferinghimatthereducedpriceofeighteenpence。AsIdeclinedtheproposalonthepleaofanappointment,hewassogoodastotakemeintoayardandshowmewherethegallowswaskept,andalsowherepeoplewerepubliclywhipped,andthenheshowedmetheDebtors\'Door,outofwhichculpritscametobehanged:heighteningtheinterestofthatdreadfulportalbygivingmetounderstandthat`fouron\'em\'wouldcomeoutatthatdoorthedayafterto-morrowateightinthemorning,tobekilledinarow。

  Thiswashorrible,andgavemeasickeningideaofLondon:themoresoastheLordChiefJustice\'sproprietorworefromhishatdowntohisbootsandupagaintohispocket-handkerchiefinclusivemildewedclothes,whichhadevidentlynotbelongedtohimoriginally,andwhich,Itookitintomyhead,hehadboughtcheapoftheexecutioner。UnderthesecircumstancesIthoughtmyselfwellridofhimforashilling。

  IdroppedintotheofficetoaskifMrJaggershadcomeinyet,andIfoundhehadnot,andIstrolledoutagain。Thistime,ImadethetourofLittleBritain,andturnedintoBartholomewClose;andnowIbecameawarethatotherpeoplewerewaitingaboutforMrJaggers,aswellasI。

  ThereweretwomenofsecretappearancelounginginBartholomewClose,andthoughtfullyfittingtheirfeetintothecracksofthepavementastheytalkedtogether,oneofwhomsaidtotheotherwhentheyfirstpassedme,that`Jaggerswoulddoitifitwastobedone。\'Therewasaknotofthreemenandtwowomenstandingatacorner,andoneofthewomenwascryingonherdirtyshawl,andtheothercomfortedherbysaying,asshepulledherownshawloverhershoulders,`Jaggersisforhim,\'Melia,andwhatmorecouldyouhave?\'Therewasared-eyedlittleJewwhocameintotheClosewhileIwasloiteringthere,incompanywithasecondlittleJewwhomhesentuponanerrand;andwhilethemessengerwasgone,IremarkedthisJew,whowasofahighlyexcitabletemperament,performingajigofanxietyunderalamp-postandaccompanyinghimself,inakindoffrenzy,withthewords,`OhJaggerth,Jaggerth,Jaggerth!allotherthithCag-Maggerth,givemeJaggerth!\'Thesetestimoniestothepopularityofmyguardianmadeadeepimpressiononme,andIadmiredandwonderedmorethanever。

  Atlength,asIwaslookingoutattheirongateofBartholomewCloseintoLittleBritain,IsawMrJaggerscomingacrosstheroadtowardsme。

  Alltheotherswhowerewaiting,sawhimatthesametime,andtherewasquitearushathim。MrJaggers,puttingahandonmyshoulderandwalkingmeonathissidewithoutsayinganythingtome,addressedhimselftohisfollowers。

  First,hetookthetwosecretmen。

  `Now,Ihavenothingtosaytoyou,\'saidMrJaggers,throwinghisfingeratthem。`IwanttoknownomorethanIknow。Astotheresult,it\'satoss-up。Itoldyoufromthefirstitwastoss-up。HaveyoupaidWemmick?\'

  `Wemadethemoneyupthismorning,sir,\'saidoneofthemen,submissively,whiletheotherperusedMrJaggers\'sface。

  `Idon\'taskyouwhenyoumadeitup,orwhere,orwhetheryoumadeitupatall。HasWemmickgotit?\'

  `Yes,sir,\'saidboththementogether。

  `Verywell;thenyoumaygo。Now,Iwon\'thaveit!\'saidMrJaggers,wavinghishandatthemtoputthembehindhim。`Ifyousayawordtome,I\'llthrowupthecase。\'

  `Wethought,MrJaggers——\'oneofthemenbegan,pullingoffhishat。

  `That\'swhatItoldyounottodo,\'saidMrJaggers。`Youthought!

  Ithinkforyou;that\'senoughforyou。IfIwantyou,Iknowwheretofindyou;Idon\'twantyoutofindme。NowIwon\'thaveit。Iwon\'thearaword。\'

  ThetwomenlookedatoneanotherasMrJaggerswavedthembehindagain,andhumblyfellbackandwereheardnomore。

  `Andnowyou!\'saidMrJaggers,suddenlystopping,andturningonthetwowomenwiththeshawls,fromwhomthethreemenhadmeeklyseparated-

  `Oh!Amelia,isit?\'

  `Yes,MrJaggers。\'

  `Anddoyouremember,\'retortedMrJaggers,`thatbutformeyouwouldn\'tbehereandcouldn\'tbehere?\'

  `Ohyes,sir!\'exclaimedbothwomentogether。`Lordblessyou,sir,wellweknowsthat!\'

  `Thenwhy,\'saidMrJaggers,`doyoucomehere?\'

  `MyBill,sir!\'thecryingwomanpleaded。

  `Now,Itellyouwhat!\'saidMrJaggers。`Onceforall。Ifyoudon\'tknowthatyourBill\'singoodhands,Iknowit。Andifyoucomehere,botheringaboutyourBill,I\'llmakeanexampleofbothyourBillandyou,andlethimslipthroughmyfingers。HaveyoupaidWemmick?\'

  `Ohyes,sir!Everyfarden。\'

  `Verywell。Thenyouhavedoneallyouhavegottodo。Sayanotherword-onesingleword-andWemmickshallgiveyouyourmoneyback。\'

  Thisterriblethreatcausedthetwowomentofalloffimmediately。NooneremainednowbuttheexcitableJew,whohadalreadyraisedtheskirtsofMrJaggers\'scoattohislipsseveraltimes。

  `Idon\'tknowthisman!\'saidMrJaggers,inthesamedevastatingstrain:

  `Whatdoesthisfellowwant?\'

  `MathearMithterJaggerth。HownbrothertoHabrahamLatharuth?\'

  `Who\'she?\'saidMrJaggers。`Letgoofmycoat。\'

  Thesuitor,kissingthehemofthegarmentagainbeforerelinquishingit,replied,`HabrahamLatharuth,onthuthpithionofplate。\'

  `You\'retoolate,\'saidMrJaggers。`Iamovertheway。\'

  `Holyfather,MithterJaggerth!\'criedmyexcitableacquaintance,turningwhite,`don\'tthayyou\'reagainHabrahamLatharuth!\'

  `Iam,\'saidMrJaggers,`andthere\'sanendofit。Getoutoftheway。\'

  `MithterJaggerth!Halfamoment!Myhowncuthen\'thgonetoMithterWemmickatthithprethentminute,tohofferhimhanytermth。MithterJaggerth!

  Halfaquarterofamoment!Ifyou\'dhavethecondethenthuntobeboughtofffromthet\'otherthide-athanythuperiorprithe!-moneynoobject!-

  MithterJaggerth-Mithter-!\'

  Myguardianthrewhissupplicantoffwithsupremeindifference,andlefthimdancingonthepavementasifitwerered-hot。Withoutfurtherinterruption,wereachedthefrontoffice,wherewefoundtheclerkandthemaninvelveteenwiththefurcap。

  `Here\'sMike,\'saidtheclerk,gettingdownfromhisstool,andapproachingMrJaggersconfidentially。

  `Oh!\'saidMrJaggers,turningtotheman,whowaspullingalockofhairinthemiddleofhisforehead,liketheBullinCockRobinpullingatthebell-rope;`yourmancomesonthisafternoon。Well?\'

  `Well,Mas\'rJaggers,\'returnedMike,inthevoiceofasuffererfromaconstitutionalcold;`arteradealo\'trouble,I\'vefoundone,sir,asmightdo。\'

  `Whatishepreparedtoswear?\'

  `Well,Mas\'rJaggers,\'saidMike,wipinghisnoseonhisfurcapthistime;`inageneralway,anythink。\'

  MrJaggerssuddenlybecamemostirate。`Now,Iwarnedyoubefore,\'saidhe,throwinghisforefingerattheterrifiedclient,`thatifyoueverpresumedtotalkinthatwayhere,I\'dmakeanexampleofyou。Youinfernalscoundrel,howdareyoutellMEthat?\'

  Theclientlookedscared,butbewilderedtoo,asifhewereunconsciouswhathehaddone。

  `Spooney!\'saidtheclerk,inalowvoice,givinghimastirwithhiselbow。`SoftHead!Needyousayitfacetoface?\'

  `Now,Iaskyou,youblunderingbooby,\'saidmyguardian,verysternly,`oncemoreandforthelasttime,whatthemanyouhavebroughthereispreparedtoswear?\'

  Mikelookedhardatmyguardian,asifheweretryingtolearnalessonfromhisface,andslowlyreplied,`Aythertocharacter,ortohavingbeeninhiscompanyandneverlefthimallthenightinquestion。\'

  `Now,becareful。Inwhatstationoflifeisthisman?\'

  Mikelookedathiscap,andlookedatthefloor,andlookedattheceiling,andlookedattheclerk,andevenlookedatme,beforebeginningtoreplyinanervousmanner,`We\'vedressedhimuplike——\'whenmyguardianblusteredout:

  `What?YouWILL,willyou?\'

  `Spooney!\'addedtheclerkagain,withanotherstir。

  Aftersomehelplesscastingabout,Mikebrightenedandbeganagain:

  `Heisdressedlikea\'spectablepieman。Asortofapastry-cook。\'

  `Ishehere?\'askedmyguardian。

  `Ilefthim,\'saidMike,`asettinonsomedoorstepsroundthecorner。\'

  `Takehimpastthatwindow,andletmeseehim。\'

  Thewindowindicated,wastheofficewindow。Weallthreewenttoit,behindthewireblind,andpresentlysawtheclientgobyinanaccidentalmanner,withamurderous-lookingtallindividual,inashortsuitofwhitelinenandapapercap。Thisguilelessconfectionerwasnotbyanymeanssober,andhadablackeyeinthegreenstageofrecovery,whichwaspaintedover。

  `Tellhimtotakehiswitnessawaydirectly,\'saidmyguardiantotheclerk,inextremedisgust,`andaskhimwhathemeansbybringingsuchafellowasthat。\'

  Myguardianthentookmeintohisownroom,andwhilehelunched,standing,fromasandwich-boxandapocketflaskofsherryheseemedtobullyhisverysandwichasheateit,informedmewhatarrangementshehadmadeforme。Iwastogoto`Barnard\'sInn,\'toyoungMrPocket\'srooms,whereabedhadbeensentinformyaccommodation;IwastoremainwithyoungMrPocketuntilMonday;onMondayIwastogowithhimtohisfather\'shouseonavisit,thatImighttryhowIlikedit。Also,Iwastoldwhatmyallowancewastobe-itwasaveryliberalone-andhadhandedtomefromoneofmyguardian\'sdrawers,thecardsofcertaintradesmenwithwhomIwastodealforallkindsofclothes,andsuchotherthingsasI

  couldinreasonwant。`Youwillfindyourcreditgood,MrPip,\'saidmyguardian,whoseflaskofsherrysmeltlikeawholecask-full,ashehastilyrefreshedhimself,`butIshallbythismeansbeabletocheckyourbills,andtopullyouupifIfindyououtrunningtheconstable。Ofcourseyou\'llgowrongsomehow,butthat\'snofaultofmine。\'

  AfterIhadponderedalittleoverthisencouragingsentiment,IaskedMrJaggersifIcouldsendforacoach?Hesaiditwasnotworthwhile,Iwassonearmydestination;Wemmickshouldwalkroundwithme,ifIpleased。

  IthenfoundthatWemmickwastheclerkinthenextroom。Anotherclerkwasrungdownfromup-stairstotakehisplacewhilehewasout,andI

  accompaniedhimintothestreet,aftershakinghandswithmyguardian。

  Wefoundanewsetofpeoplelingeringoutside,butWemmickmadeawayamongthembysayingcoollyyetdecisively,`Itellyouit\'snouse;hewon\'thaveawordtosaytooneofyou;\'andwesoongotclearofthem,andwentonsidebyside。

  Chapter21

  CASTINGmyeyesonMrWemmickaswewentalong,toseewhathewaslikeinthelightofday,Ifoundhimtobeadryman,rathershortinstature,withasquarewoodenface,whoseexpressionseemedtohavebeenimperfectlychippedoutwithadull-edgedchisel。Thereweresomemarksinitthatmighthavebeendimples,ifthematerialhadbeensofterandtheinstrumentfiner,butwhich,asitwas,wereonlydints。Thechiselhadmadethreeorfouroftheseattemptsatembellishmentoverhisnose,buthadgiventhemupwithoutanefforttosmooththemoff。Ijudgedhimtobeabachelorfromthefrayedconditionofhislinen,andheappearedtohavesustainedagoodmanybereavements;for,heworeatleastfourmourningrings,besidesabroochrepresentingaladyandaweepingwillowatatombwithanurnonit。Inoticed,too,thatseveralringsandsealshungathiswatchchain,asifhewerequiteladenwithremembrancesofdepartedfriends。Hehadglitteringeyes-small,keen,andblack-andthinwidemottledlips。Hehadhadthem,tothebestofmybelief,fromfortytofiftyyears。

  `SoyouwereneverinLondonbefore?\'saidMrWemmicktome。

  `No,\'saidI。

  `Iwasnewhereonce,\'saidMrWemmick。`Rumtothinkofnow!\'

  `Youarewellacquaintedwithitnow?\'

  `Why,yes,\'saidMrWemmick。`Iknowthemovesofit。\'

  `Isitaverywickedplace?\'Iasked,moreforthesakeofsayingsomethingthanforinformation。

  `Youmaygetcheated,robbed,andmurdered,inLondon。Butthereareplentyofpeopleanywhere,who\'lldothatforyou。\'

  `Ifthereisbadbloodbetweenyouandthem,\'saidI,tosoftenitoffalittle。

  `Oh!Idon\'tknowaboutbadblood,\'returnedMrWemmick;`there\'snotmuchbadbloodabout。They\'lldoit,ifthere\'sanythingtobegotbyit。\'

  `Thatmakesitworse。\'

  `Youthinkso?\'returnedMrWemmick。`Muchaboutthesame,Ishouldsay。\'

  Heworehishatonthebackofhishead,andlookedstraightbeforehim:walkinginaself-containedwayasiftherewerenothinginthestreetstoclaimhisattention。Hismouthwassuchapostofficeofamouththathehadamechanicalappearanceofsmiling。WehadgottothetopofHolbornHillbeforeIknewthatitwasmerelyamechanicalappearance,andthathewasnotsmilingatall。

  `DoyouknowwhereMrMatthewPocketlives?\'IaskedMrWemmick。

  `Yes,\'saidhe,noddinginthedirection。`AtHammersmith,westofLondon。\'

  `Isthatfar?\'

  `Well!Sayfivemiles。\'

  `Doyouknowhim?\'

  `Why,you\'rearegularcross-examiner!\'saidMrWemmick,lookingatmewithanapprovingair。`Yes,Iknowhim。Iknowhim!\'

  Therewasanairoftolerationordepreciationabouthisutteranceofthesewords,thatratherdepressedme;andIwasstilllookingsidewaysathisblockofafaceinsearchofanyencouragingnotetothetext,whenhesaidherewewereatBarnard\'sInn。Mydepressionwasnotalleviatedbytheannouncement,for,IhadsupposedthatestablishmenttobeanhotelkeptbyMrBarnard,towhichtheBlueBoarinourtownwasamerepublic-house。

  WhereasInowfoundBarnardtobeadisembodiedspirit,orafiction,andhisinnthedingiestcollectionofshabbybuildingseversqueezedtogetherinarankcornerasaclubforTom-cats。

  Weenteredthishaventhroughawicket-gate,andweredisgorgedbyanintroductorypassageintoamelancholylittlesquarethatlookedtomelikeaflatburying-ground。Ithoughtithadthemostdismaltreesinit,andthemostdismalsparrows,andthemostdismalcats,andthemostdismalhousesinnumberhalfadozenorso,thatIhadeverseen。Ithoughtthewindowsofthesetsofchambersintowhichthosehousesweredivided,wereineverystageofdilapidatedblindandcurtain,crippledflower-pot,crackedglass,dustydecay,andmiserablemakeshift;whileToLetToLetToLet,glaredatmefromemptyrooms,asifnonewwretchesevercamethere,andthevengeanceofthesoulofBarnardwerebeingslowlyappeasedbythegradualsuicideofthepresentoccupantsandtheirunholyintermentunderthegravel。AfrouzymourningofsootandsmokeattiredthisforlorncreationofBarnard,andithadstrewnashesonitshead,andwasundergoingpenanceandhumiliationasameredust-hole。Thusfarmysenseofsight;

  whiledryrotandwetrotandallthesilentrotsthatrotinneglectedroofandcellar-rotofratandmouseandbugandcoaching-stablesnearathandbesides-addressedthemselvesfaintlytomysenseofsmell,andmoaned,`TryBarnard\'sMixture。\'

  Soimperfectwasthisrealizationofthefirstofmygreatexpectations,thatIlookedindismayatMrWemmick。`Ah!\'saidhe,mistakingme;`theretirementremindsyouofthecountry。Soitdoesme。\'

  Heledmeintoacornerandconductedmeupaflightofstairs-whichappearedtometobeslowlycollapsingintosawdust,sothatoneofthosedaystheupperlodgerswouldlookoutattheirdoorsandfindthemselveswithoutthemeansofcomingdown-toasetofchambersonthetopfloor。

  MR。POCKET,JUN。,waspaintedonthedoor,andtherewasalabelontheletter-box,`Returnshortly。\'

  `Hehardlythoughtyou\'dcomesosoon,\'MrWemmickexplained。`Youdon\'twantmeanymore?\'

  `No,thankyou,\'saidI。

  `AsIkeepthecash,\'MrWemmickobserved,`weshallmostlikelymeetprettyoften。Goodday。\'

  `Goodday。\'

  Iputoutmyhand,andMrWemmickatfirstlookedatitasifhethoughtIwantedsomething。Thenhelookedatme,andsaid,correctinghimself,`Tobesure!Yes。You\'reinthehabitofshakinghands?\'

  Iwasratherconfused,thinkingitmustbeoutoftheLondonfashion,butsaidyes。

  `Ihavegotsooutofit!\'saidMrWemmick-`exceptatlast。Veryglad,I\'msure,tomakeyouracquaintance。Goodday!\'

  Whenwehadshakenhandsandhewasgone,Iopenedthestaircasewindowandhadnearlybeheadedmyself,for,thelineshadrottedaway,anditcamedownliketheguillotine。HappilyitwassoquickthatIhadnotputmyheadout。Afterthisescape,IwascontenttotakeafoggyviewoftheInnthroughthewindow\'sencrustingdirt,andtostanddolefullylookingout,sayingtomyselfthatLondonwasdecidedlyoverrated。

  MrPocket,Junior\'s,ideaofShortlywasnotmine,forIhadnearlymaddenedmyselfwithlookingoutforhalfanhour,andhadwrittenmynamewithmyfingerseveraltimesinthedirtofeverypaneinthewindow,beforeIheardfootstepsonthestairs。Graduallytherearosebeforemethehat,head,neckcloth,waistcoat,trousers,boots,ofamemberofsocietyofaboutmyownstanding。Hehadapaper-bagundereacharmandapottleofstrawberriesinonehand,andwasoutofbreath。

  `MrPip?\'saidhe。

  `MrPocket?\'saidI。

  `Dearme!\'heexclaimed。`Iamextremelysorry;butIknewtherewasacoachfromyourpartofthecountryatmidday,andIthoughtyouwouldcomebythatone。Thefactis,Ihavebeenoutonyouraccount-notthatthatisanyexcuse-forIthought,comingfromthecountry,youmightlikealittlefruitafterdinner,andIwenttoConventGardenMarkettogetitgood。\'

  ForareasonthatIhad,Ifeltasifmyeyeswouldstartoutofmyhead。Iacknowledgedhisattentionincoherently,andbegantothinkthiswasadream。

  `Dearme!\'saidMrPocket,Junior。`Thisdoorsticksso!\'

  Ashewasfastmakingjamofhisfruitbywrestlingwiththedoorwhilethepaper-bagswereunderhisarms,Ibeggedhimtoallowmetoholdthem。

  Herelinquishedthemwithanagreeablesmile,andcombatedwiththedoorasifitwereawildbeast。Ityieldedsosuddenlyatlast,thathestaggeredbackuponme,andIstaggeredbackupontheoppositedoor,andwebothlaughed。ButstillIfeltasifmyeyesmuststartoutofmyhead,andasifthismustbeadream。

  `Praycomein,\'saidMrPocket,Junior。`Allowmetoleadtheway。I

  amratherbarehere,butIhopeyou\'llbeabletomakeouttolerablywelltillMonday。Myfatherthoughtyouwouldgetonmoreagreeablythroughto-morrowwithmethanwithhim,andmightliketotakeawalkaboutLondon。

  IamsureIshallbeveryhappytoshowLondontoyou。Astoourtable,youwon\'tfindthatbad,Ihope,foritwillbesuppliedfromourcoffee-househere,anditisonlyrightIshouldaddatyourexpense,suchbeingMrJaggers\'sdirections。AStoourlodging,it\'snotbyanymeanssplendid,becauseIhavemyownbreadtoearn,andmyfatherhasn\'tanythingtogiveme,andIshouldn\'tbewillingtotakeit,ifhehad。Thisisoursitting-room-justsuchchairsandtablesandcarpetandsoforth,yousee,astheycouldsparefromhome。Youmustn\'tgivemecreditforthetableclothandspoonsandcastors,becausetheycomeforyoufromthecoffee-house。Thisismylittlebedroom;rathermusty,butBarnard\'sismusty。Thisisyourbed-room;thefurniture\'shiredfortheoccasion,butItrustitwillanswerthepurpose;ifyoushouldwantanything,I\'llgoandfetchit。Thechambersareretired,andweshallbealonetogether,butweshan\'tfight,Idaresay。But,dearme,Ibegyourpardon,you\'reholdingthefruitallthistime。Prayletmetakethesebagsfromyou。Iamquiteashamed。\'

  AsIstoodoppositetoMrPocket,Junior,deliveringhimthebags,One,Two,IsawthestartingappearancecomeintohisowneyesthatIknewtobeinmine,andhesaid,fallingback:

  `Lordblessme,you\'retheprowlingboy!\'

  `Andyou,\'saidI,`arethepaleyounggentleman!\'

  Chapter22

  THEpaleyounggentlemanandIstoodcontemplatingoneanotherinBarnard\'sInn,untilwebothburstoutlaughing。`Theideaofitsbeingyou!\'saidhe。`Theideaofitsbeingyou!\'saidI。Andthenwecontemplatedoneanotherafresh,andlaughedagain。`Well!\'saidthepaleyounggentleman,reachingouthishandgoodhumouredly,`it\'sallovernow,Ihope,anditwillbemagnanimousinyouifyou\'llforgivemeforhavingknockedyouaboutso。\'

  IderivedfromthisspeechthatMrHerbertPocketforHerbertwasthepaleyounggentleman\'snamestillratherconfoundedhisintentionwithhisexecution。ButImadeamodestreply,andweshookhandswarmly。

  `Youhadn\'tcomeintoyourgoodfortuneatthattime?\'saidHerbertPocket。

  `No,\'saidI。

  `No,\'heacquiesced:`Iheardithadhappenedverylately。Iwasratheronthelook-outforgood-fortunethen。\'

  `Indeed?\'

  `Yes。MissHavishamhadsentforme,toseeifshecouldtakeafancytome。Butshecouldn\'t-atallevents,shedidn\'t。\'

  IthoughtitpolitetoremarkthatIwassurprisedtohearthat。

  `Badtaste,\'saidHerbert,laughing,`butafact。Yes,shehadsentformeonatrialvisit,andifIhadcomeoutofitsuccessfully,IsupposeIshouldhavebeenprovidedfor;perhapsIshouldhavebeenwhat-you-may-calledittoEstella。\'

  `What\'sthat?\'Iasked,withsuddengravity。

  Hewasarranginghisfruitinplateswhilewetalked,whichdividedhisattention,andwasthecauseofhishavingmadethislapseofaword。

  `Affianced,\'heexplained,stillbusywiththefruit。`Betrothed。Engaged。

  What\'s-his-named。Anywordofthatsort。\'

  `Howdidyoubearyourdisappointment?\'Iasked。

  `Pooh!\'saidhe,`Ididn\'tcaremuchforit。She\'saTartar。\'

  `MissHavisham?\'

  `Idon\'tsaynotothat,butImeantEstella。Thatgirl\'shardandhaughtyandcapricioustothelastdegree,andhasbeenbroughtupbyMissHavishamtowreakrevengeonallthemalesex。\'

  `WhatrelationisshetoMissHavisham?\'

  `None,\'saidhe。`Onlyadopted。\'

  `Whyshouldshewreakrevengeonallthemalesex?Whatrevenge?\'

  `Lord,MrPip!\'saidhe。`Don\'tyouknow?\'

  `No,\'saidI。

  `Dearme!It\'squiteastory,andshallbesavedtilldinner-time。

  Andnowletmetakethelibertyofaskingyouaquestion。Howdidyoucomethere,thatday?\'

  Itoldhim,andhewasattentiveuntilIhadfinished,andthenburstoutlaughingagain,andaskedmeifIwassoreafterwards?Ididn\'taskhimifhewas,formyconvictiononthatpointwasperfectlyestablished。

  `MrJaggersisyourguardian,Iunderstand?\'hewenton。

  `Yes。\'

  `YouknowheisMissHavisham\'smanofbusinessandsolicitor,andhasherconfidencewhennobodyelsehas?\'

  ThiswasbringingmeIfelttowardsdangerousground。IansweredwithaconstraintImadenoattempttodisguise,thatIhadseenMrJaggersinMissHavisham\'shouseontheverydayofourcombat,butneveratanyothertime,andthatIbelievedhehadnorecollectionofhavingeverseenmethere。

  `Hewassoobligingastosuggestmyfatherforyourtutor,andhecalledonmyfathertoproposeit。OfcourseheknewaboutmyfatherfromhisconnexionwithMissHavisham。MyfatherisMissHavisham\'scousin;notthatthatimpliesfamiliarintercoursebetweenthem,forheisabadcourtierandwillnotpropitiateher。\'

  HerbertPockethadafrankandeasywaywithhimthatwasverytaking。

  Ihadneverseenanyonethen,andIhaveneverseenanyonesince,whomorestronglyexpressedtome,ineverylookandtone,anaturalincapacitytodoanythingsecretandmean。Therewassomethingwonderfullyhopefulabouthisgeneralair,andsomethingthatatthesametimewhisperedtomehewouldneverbeverysuccessfulorrich。Idon\'tknowhowthiswas。

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