Chapter5
Showingwhotheamiablelady，andherunamiablemaidwereAsinthemonthofJune，thedamaskrose，whichchancehathplantedamongthelilies，withtheircandidhuemixeshisvermilion；
orassomeplaysomeheiferinthepleasantmonthofMaydiffusesherodoriferousbreathovertheflowerymeadows；oras，inthebloomingmonthofApril，thegentle，constantdove，perchedonsomefairbough，sitsmeditatingonhermate，so，lookingahundredcharmsandbreathingasmanysweets，herthoughtsbeingfixedonherTommy，withaheartasgoodandinnocentasherfacewasbeautiful，Sophiaforitwassheherselflayrecliningherlovelyheadonherhand，whenhermaidenteredtheroom，and，runningdirectlytothebed，cried，\"Madam-madam-whodothyourladyshipthinkisinthehouse？\"
Sophiastartingup，cried，\"Ihopemyfatherhathnotovertakenus。\"
\"No，madam，itisoneworthahundredfathers；Mr。Joneshimselfishereatthisveryinstant。\"\"Mr。Jones！\"saysSophia，\"itisimpossible！Icannotbesofortunate。\"Hermaidaverredthefact，andwaspresentlydetachedbyhermistresstoorderhimtobecalled；forshesaidshewasresolvedtoseehimimmediately。
Mrs。Honourhadnosoonerleftthekitcheninthemannerwehavebeforeseenthanthelandladyfellseverelyuponher。Thepoorwomanhadindeedbeenloadingherheartwithfoullanguageforsometime，andnowitscouredoutofhermouth，asfilthdothfromamud-cart，whentheboardwhichconfinesitisremoved。Partridgelikewiseshovelledinhisshareofcalumny，andwhatmaysurprizethereadernotonlybespatteredthemaid，butattemptedtosullythelily-whitecharacterofSophiaherself。\"Neverabarrelthebetterherring，\"crieshe，\"Nosciturasocio，isatruesaying。Itmustbeconfessed，indeed，thattheladyinthefinegarmentsisthecivillerofthetwo；butIwarrantneitherofthemareabitbetterthantheyshouldbe。AcoupleofBathtrulls，I’llanswerforthem；
yourqualitydon’trideaboutatthistimeo’nightwithoutservants。\"
\"Sbodlikins，andthat’strue，\"criesthelandlady，\"youhavecertainlyhitupontheverymatter；forqualitydon’tcomeintoahousewithoutbespeakingasupper，whethertheyeatitorno。\"
Whiletheywerethusdiscoursing，Mrs。Honourreturnedanddischargedhercommission，bybiddingthelandladyimmediatelywakeMr。Jones，andtellhimaladywantedtospeakwithhim。ThelandladyreferredhertoPartridge，saying，\"hewasthesquire’sfriend:but，forherpart，shenevercalledmenfolks，especiallygentlemen，\"andthenwalkedsullenlyoutofthekitchen。HonourappliedherselftoPartridge；butherefused，\"formyfriend，\"crieshe，\"wenttobedverylate，andhewouldbeveryangrytobedisturbedsosoon。\"Mrs。Honourinsistedstilltohavehimcalled，saying，\"shewassure，insteadofbeingangry，thathewouldbetothehighestdegreedelightedwhenheknewtheoccasion。\"\"Anothertime，perhaps，hemight，\"criesPartridge；\"butnonomniapossumusomnes。Onewomanisenoughatonceforareasonableman。\"\"Whatdoyoumeanbyonewoman，fellow？\"criesHonour。\"Noneofyourfellow，\"answeredPartridge。HethenproceededtoinformherplainlythatJoneswasinbedwithawench，andmadeuseofanexpressiontooindelicatetobehereinserted；whichsoenragedMrs。Honour，thatshecalledhimjackanapes，andreturnedinaviolenthurrytohermistress，whomsheacquaintedwiththesuccessofhererrand，andwiththeaccountshehadreceived；which，ifpossible，sheexaggerated，beingasangrywithJonesasifhehadpronouncedallthewordsthatcamefromthemouthofPartridge。Shedischargedatorrentofabuseonthemaster，andadvisedhermistresstoquitallthoughtsofamanwhohadnevershownhimselfdeservingofher。ShethenrippedupthestoryofMollySeagrim，andgavethemostmaliciousturntohisformerlyquittingSophiaherself；which，Imustconfess，thepresentincidentnotalittlecountenanced。
ThespiritsofSophiaweretoomuchdissipatedbyconcerntoenablehertostopthetorrentofhermaid。Atlast，however，sheinterruptedher，saying，\"Inevercanbelievethis；somevillainhathbeliedhim。Yousayyouhaditfromhisfriend；butsurelyitisnottheofficeofafriendtobetraysuchsecrets。\"\"Isuppose，\"
criesHonour，\"thefellowishispimp；forIneversawsoill-lookedavillain。Besides，suchprofligaterakesasMr。Jonesareneverashamedofthesematters。\"
Tosaythetruth，thisbehaviourofPartridgewasalittleinexcusable；buthehadnotsleptofftheeffectofthedosewhichheswallowedtheeveningbefore；whichhad，inthemorning，receivedtheadditionofaboveapintofwine，orindeedratherofmaltspirits；fortheperrywasbynomeanspure。Now，thatpartofhisheadwhichNaturedesignedforthereservoirofdrinkbeingveryshallow，asmallquantityofliquoroverflowedit，andopenedthesluicesofhisheart；sothatallthesecretstheredepositedrunout。
Thesesluiceswereindeed，naturally，veryill-secured。Togivethebest-naturedturnwecantohisdisposition，hewasaveryhonestman；
for，ashewasthemostinquisitiveofmortals，andeternallypryingintothesecretsofothers，soheveryfaithfullypaidthembycommunicating，inreturn，everythingwithinhisknowledge。
WhileSophia，tormentedwithanxiety，knewnotwhattobeliever，norwhatresolutiontotake；Susanarrivedwiththesack-whey。Mrs。Honourimmediatelyadvisedhermistress，inawhisper，topumpthiswench，whoprobablycouldinformherofthetruth。Sophiaapprovedit，andbeganasfollows:\"Comehither，child；nowanswermetrulywhatIamgoingtoaskyou，andIpromiseyouIwillverywellrewardyou。Isthereayounggentlemaninthishouse，ahandsomeyounggentleman，that——\"HereSophiablushedandwasconfounded。\"Ayounggentleman，\"
criesHonour，\"thatcamehitherincompanywiththatsaucyrascalwhoisnowinthekitchen？\"Susananswered，\"Therewas。\"\"Doyouknowanythingofanylady？\"continuesSophia，\"anylady？Idon’taskyouwhethersheishandsomeorno；perhapssheisnot；that’snothingtothepurpose；butdoyouknowofanylady？\"\"La，madam，\"
criesHonour，\"youwillmakeaverybadexaminer。Hark’ee，child，\"
saysshe，\"isnotthatveryyounggentlemannowinbedwithsomenastytrullorother？\"HereSusansmiled，andwassilent。\"Answerthequestion，child，\"saysSophia，\"andhere’saguineaforyou。\"-\"A
guinea！madam，\"criesSusan；\"la，what’saguinea？IfmymistressshouldknowitIshallcertainlylosemyplacethatveryinstant。\"
\"Here’sanotherforyou，\"saysSophia，\"andIpromiseyoufaithfullyyourmistressshallneverknowit。\"Susan，afteraveryshorthesitation，tookthemoney，andtoldthewholestory，concludingwithsaying，\"Ifyouhaveanygreatcurisity，madam，Icanstealsoftlyintohisroom，andseewhetherhebeinhisownbedorno。\"SheaccordinglydidthisbySophia’sdesire，andreturnedwithananswerinthenegative。
Sophianowtrembledandturnedpale。Mrs。Honourbeggedhertobecomforted，andnottothinkanymoreofsoworthlessafellow。\"Whythere，\"saysSusan，\"Ihope，madam，yourladyshipwon’tbeoffended；
butpray，madam，isnotyourladyship’snameMadamSophiaWestern？\"
\"Howisitpossibleyoushouldknowme？\"answeredSophia。\"Whythatman，thatthegentlewomanspokeof，whoisinthekitchen，toldaboutyoulastnight。ButIhopeyourladyshipisnotangrywithme。\"\"Indeed，child，\"saidshe，\"Iamnot；praytellmeall，andI
promiseyouI’llrewardyou。\"\"Why，madam，\"continuedSusan，\"thatmantoldusallinthekitchenthatMadamSophiaWestern-indeedIdon’tknowhowtobringitout。\"-Hereshestopt，till，havingreceivedencouragementfromSophia，andbeingvehementlypressedbyMrs。
Honour，sheproceededthus:-\"Hetoldus，madam，thoughtobesureitisallalie，thatyourladyshipwasdyingforloveoftheyoungsquire，andthathewasgoingtothewarstogetridofyou。Ithoughttomyselfthenhewasafalse-heartedwretch；but，now，toseesuchafine，rich，beautifulladyasyoube，forsakenforsuchanordinarywoman；fortobesuresosheis，andanotherman’swifeintothebargain。Itissuchastrangeunnaturalthing，inamanner。\"
Sophiagaveherathirdguinea，and，tellinghershewouldcertainlybeherfriendifshementionednothingofwhathadpassed，norinformedanyonewhoshewas，dismissedthegirl，withorderstothepost-boytogetthehorsesreadyimmediately。
Beingnowleftalonewithhermaid，shetoldhertrustywaiting-woman，\"Thatsheneverwasmoreeasythanatpresent。Iamnowconvinced，\"saidshe，\"heisnotonlyavillain，butalowdespicablewretch。Icanforgiveallratherthanhisexposingmynameinsobarbarousamanner。Thatrendershimtheobjectofmycontempt。Yes，Honour，Iamnoweasy；Iamindeed；Iamveryeasy；\"andthensheburstintoaviolentfloodoftears。
AfterashortintervalspentbySophia，chieflyincrying，andassuringhermaidthatshewasperfectlyeasy，Susanarrivedwithanaccountthatthehorseswereready，whenaveryextraordinarythoughtsuggesteditselftoouryoungheroine，bywhichMr。Joneswouldbeacquaintedwithherhavingbeenattheinn，inawaywhich，ifanysparksofaffectionforherremainedinhim，wouldbeatleastsomepunishmentforhisfaults。
Thereaderwillbepleasedtorememberalittlemuff，whichhathhadthehonourofbeingmorethanoncerememberedalreadyinthishistory。
Thismuff，eversincethedepartureofMr。Jones，hadbeentheconstantcompanionofSophiabyday，andherbedfellowbynight；andthismuffshehadatthisveryinstantuponherarm；whenceshetookitoffwithgreatindignation，and，havingwrithernamewithherpenciluponapieceofpaperwhichshepinnedtoit，shebribedthemaidtoconveyitintotheemptybedofMr。Jones，inwhich，ifhedidnotfindit，shechargedhertotakesomemethodofconveyingitbeforehiseyesinthemorning。
Then，havingpaidforwhatMrs。Honourhadeaten，inwhichbillwasincludedanaccountforwhatsheherselfmighthaveeaten，shemountedherhorse，and，oncemoreassuringhercompanionthatshewasperfectlyeasy，continuedherjourney。
Chapter6
Containing，amongotherthings，theingenuityofPartridge，themadnessofJones，andthefollyofFitzpatrickItwasnowpastfiveinthemorning，andothercompanybegantoriseandcometothekitchen，amongwhomweretheserjeantandthecoachman，who，beingthoroughlyreconciled，madealibation，or，intheEnglishphrase，drankaheartycuptogether。
InthisdrinkingnothingmoreremarkablehappenedthanthebehaviourofPartridge，who，whentheserjeantdrankahealthtoKingGeorge，repeatedonlythewordKing；norcouldhebebroughttouttermore；
forthoughhewasgoingtofightagainsthisowncause，yethecouldnotbeprevailedupontodrinkagainstit。
Mr。Jones，beingnowreturnedtohisownbedbutfromwhencehereturnedwemustbegtobeexcusedfromrelating，summonedPartridgefromthisagreeablecompany，who，afteraceremoniouspreface，havingobtainedleavetoofferhisadvice，deliveredhimselfasfollows:-
\"Itis，sir，anoldsaying，andatrueone，thatawisemanmaysometimeslearncounselfromafool；Iwish，therefore，Imightbesoboldastoofferyoumyadvice，whichistoreturnhomeagain，andleavethesehorridabella，thesebloodywars，tofellowswhoarecontentedtoswallowgunpowder，becausetheyhavenothingelsetoeat。
Now，everybodyknowsyourhonourwantsfornothinghome；whenthat’sthecase，whyshouldanymantravelabroad？\"
\"Partridge，\"criesJones，\"thouartcertainlyacoward；Iwish，therefore，thouwouldstreturnhomethyself，andtroublemenomore。\"
\"Iaskyourhonour’spardon，\"criesPartridge；\"Ispokeonyouraccountmorethanmyown；forastome，Heavenknowsmycircumstancesarebadenough，andIamsofarfrombeingafraid，thatIvalueapistol，orablunderbuss，oranysuchthing，nomorethanapop-gun。Everymanmustdieonce，andwhatsignifiesthemannerhow？besides，perhapsImaycomeoffwiththelossonlyofanarmoraleg。Iassureyou，sir，Iwasneverlessafraidinmylife；andso，ifyourhonourisresolvedtogoon，Iamresolvedtofollowyou。But，inthatcase，IwishImightgivemyopinion。Tobesure，itisascandalouswayoftravelling，foragreatgentlemanlikeyoutowalkafoot。Nowherearetwoorthreegoodhorsesinthestable，whichthelandlordwillcertainlymakenoscrupleoftrustingyouwith；but，ifheshould，Icaneasilycontrivetotakethem；and，lettheworstcometotheworst，thekingwouldcertainlypardonyou，asyouaregoingtofightinhiscause。\"
Now，asthehonestyofPartridgewasequaltohisunderstanding，andbothdealtonlyinsmallmatters，hewouldneverhaveattemptedarogueryofthiskind，hadhenotimagineditaltogethersafe；forhewasoneofthosewhohavemoreconsiderationofthegallowsthanofthefitnessofthings；but，inreality，hethoughthemighthavecommittedthisfelonywithoutanydanger；for，besidesthathedoubtednotbutthenameofMr。Allworthywouldsufficientlyquietthelandlord，heconceivedtheyshouldbealtogethersafe，whateverturnaffairsmighttake；asJones，heimagined，wouldhavefriendsenoughononeside，andashisfriendswouldaswellsecurehimontheother。
WhenMr。JonesfoundthatPartridgewasinearnestinthisproposal，heveryseverelyrebukedhim，andthatinsuchbitterterms，thattheotherattemptedtolaughitoff，andpresentlyturnedthediscoursetoothermatters；saying，hebelievedtheyweretheninabawdy-house，andthathehadwithmuchadopreventedtwowenchesfromdisturbinghishonourinthemiddleofthenight。\"Heyday！\"
sayshe，\"IbelievetheygotintoyourchamberwhetherIwouldorno；forhereliesthemuffofoneofthemontheground。\"Indeed，asJonesreturnedtohisbedinthedark，hehadneverperceivedthemuffonthequilt，and，inleapingintohisbed，hehadtumbleditonthefloor。ThisPartridgenowtookup，andwasgoingtoputintohispocket，whenJonesdesiredtoseeit。Themuffwassoveryremarkable，thatourheroemightpossiblyhaverecollecteditwithouttheinformationannexed。Buthismemorywasnotputtothathardoffice；
foratthesameinstanthesawandreadthewordsSophiaWesternuponthepaperwhichwaspinnedtoit。Hislooksnowgrewfranticinamoment，andheeagerlycriedout，\"OhHeavens！howcamethismuffhere？\"\"Iknownomorethanyourhonour，\"criedPartridge；\"butI
sawituponthearmofoneofthewomenwhowouldhavedisturbedyou，ifIwouldhavesufferedthem。\"\"Wherearethey？\"criesJones，jumpingoutofbed，andlayingholdofhiscloaths。\"Manymilesoff，I
believe，bythistime，\"saidPartridge。AndnowJones，uponfurtherenquiry，wassufficientlyassuredthatthebearerofthismuffwasnootherthanthelovelySophiaherself。
ThebehaviourofJonesonthisoccasion，histhoughts，hislooks，hiswords，hisactions，weresuchasbeggaralldescription。AftermanybitterexecrationsonPartridge，andnotfeweronhimself，heorderedthepoorfellow，whowasfrightenedoutofhiswits，torundownandhirehimhorsesatanyrate；andaveryfewminutesafterwards，havingshuffledonhisclothes，hehasteneddown-stairstoexecutetheordershimself，whichhehadjustbeforegiven。
Butbeforeweproceedtowhatpassedonhisarrivalinthekitchen，itwillbenecessarytorecurtowhathadtherehappenedsincePartridgehadfirstleftitonhismaster’ssummons。
Theserjeantwasjustmarchedoffwithhisparty，whenthetwoIrishgentlemenarose，andcamedownstairs；bothcomplainingthattheyhadbeensooftenwakedbythenoisesintheinn，thattheyhadneveroncebeenabletoclosetheireyesallnight。
Thecoachwhichhadbroughttheyoungladyandhermaid，andwhich，perhaps，thereadermayhavehithertoconcludedwasherown，was，indeed，areturnedcoachbelongingtoMr。King，ofBath，oneoftheworthiestandhonestestmenthateverdealtinhorseflesh，andwhosecoachesweheartilyrecommendtoallourreaderswhotravelthatroad。Bywhichmeanstheymay，perhaps，havethepleasureofridingintheverycoach，andbeingdrivenbytheverycoachman，thatisrecordedinthishistory。
Thecoachman，havingbuttwopassengers，andhearingMr。
MaclachlanwasgoingtoBath，offeredtocarryhimthitherataverymoderateprice。Hewasinducedtothisbythereportofthehostler，whosaidthatthehorsewhichMr。MaclachlanhadhiredfromWorcesterwouldbemuchmorepleasedwithreturningtohisfriendstherethantoprosecutealongjourney；forthatthesaidhorsewasratheratwo-leggedthanafour-leggedanimal。
Mr。Maclachlanimmediatelyclosedwiththeproposalofthecoachman，and，atthesametime，persuadedhisfriendFitzpatricktoacceptofthefourthplaceinthecoach。Thisconveyancethesorenessofhisbonesmademoreagreeabletohimthanahorse；and，beingwellassuredofmeetingwithhiswifeatBath，hethoughtalittledelaywouldbeofnoconsequence。
Maclachlan，whowasmuchthesharpermanofthetwo，nosoonerheardthatthisladycamefromChester，withtheothercircumstanceswhichhelearnedfromthehostler，thanitcameintohisheadthatshemightpossiblybehisfriend’swife；andpresentlyacquaintedhimwiththissuspicion，whichhadneveronceoccurredtoFitzpatrickhimself。Tosaythetruth，hewasoneofthosecompositionswhichnaturemakesupintoogreatahurry，andforgetstoputanybrainsintotheirheads。
Nowithappenstothissortofmen，astobadhounds，whoneverhitoffafaultthemselves；butnosoonerdothadogofsagacityopenhismouththantheyimmediatelydothesame，and，withouttheguidanceofanyscent，rundirectlyforwardsasfastastheyareable。
Inthesamemanner，theverymomentMr。Maclachlanhadmentionedhisapprehension，Mr。Fitzpatrickinstantlyconcurred，andflewdirectlyup-stairs，tosurprizehiswife，beforeheknewwhereshewas；andunluckilyasFortunelovestoplaytrickswiththosegentlemenwhoputthemselvesentirelyunderherconductranhisheadagainstseveraldoorsandpoststonopurpose。Muchkinderwasshetome，whenshesuggestedthatsimileofthehounds，justbeforeinserted；sincethepoorwifemay，ontheseoccasions，besojustlycomparedtoahuntedhare。Likethatlittlewretchedanimal，shepricksupherearstolistenafterthevoiceofherpursuer；likeher，fliesawaytremblingwhenshehearsit；and，likeher，isgenerallyovertakenanddestroyedintheend。
Thiswasnothoweverthecaseatpresent；forafteralongfruitlesssearch，Mr。Fitzpatrickreturnedtothekitchen，where，asifthishadbeenarealchace，enteredagentlemanhallowingashuntersdowhenthehoundsareatafault。Hewasjustalightedfromhishorse，andhadmanyattendantsathisheels。
Here，reader，itmaybenecessarytoacquainttheewithsomematters，which，ifthoudostknowalready，thouartwiserthanI
taketheetobe。Andthisinformationthoushaltreceiveinthenextchapter。
Chapter7
InwhichareconcludedtheadventuresthathappenedattheinnatUptonInthefirstplace，then，thisgentlemanjustarrivedwasnootherpersonthanSquireWesternhimself，whowascomehitherinpursuitofhisdaughter；and，hadhefortunatelybeentwohoursearlier，hehadnotonlyfoundher，buthisnieceintothebargain；forsuchwasthewifeofMr。Fitzpatrick，whohadrunawaywithherfiveyearsbefore，outofthecustodyofthatsagelady，MadamWestern。
NowthisladyhaddepartedfromtheinnmuchaboutthesametimewithSophia；for，havingbeenwakedbythevoiceofherhusband，shehadsentupforthelandlady，andbeingbyherapprizedofthematter，hadbribedthegoodwoman，atanextravagantprice，tofurnishherwithhorsesforherescape。Suchprevalencehadmoneyinthisfamily；andthoughthemistresswouldhaveturnedawayhermaidforacorrupthussy，ifshehadknownasmuchasthereader，yetshewasnomoreproofagainstcorruptionherselfthanpoorSusanhadbeen。
Mr。Westernandhisnephewwerenotknowntooneanother；norindeedwouldtheformerhavetakenanynoticeofthelatterifhehadknownhim；for，thisbeingastolenmatch，andconsequentlyanunnaturaloneintheopinionofthegoodsquire，hehad，fromthetimeofhercommittingit，abandonedthepooryoungcreature，whowasthennomorethaneighteen，asamonster，andhadneversincesufferedhertobenamedinhispresence。
Thekitchenwasnowasceneofuniversalconfusion，Westernenquiringafterhisdaughter，andFitzpatrickaseagerlyafterhiswife，whenJonesenteredtheroom，unfortunatelyhavingSophia’smuffinhishand。
AssoonasWesternsawJones，hesetupthesamehollaasisusedbysportsmenwhentheirgameisinview。HethenimmediatelyrunupandlaidholdofJones，crying，\"Wehavegotthedogfox，Iwarrantthebitchisnotfaroff。\"Thejargonwhichfollowedforsomeminutes，wheremanyspokedifferentthingsatthesametime，asitwouldbeverydifficulttodescribe，sowoulditbenolessunpleasanttoread。
Joneshaving，atlength，shakenMr。Westernoff，andsomeofthecompanyhavinginterferedbetweenthem，ourheroeprotestedhisinnocenceastoknowinganythingofthelady；whenParsonSupplesteppedup，andsaid，\"Itisfollytodenyit；forwhy，themarksofguiltareinthyhands。Iwillmyselfasseverateandbinditbyanoath，thatthemuffthoubearestinthyhandbelongethuntoMadamSophia；forIhavefrequentlyobservedher，oflaterdays，tobearitabouther。\"\"Mydaughter’smuff！\"criesthesquireinarage。\"Hathhegotmydaughter’smuff？bearwitnessthegoodsarefounduponhim。I’llhavehimbeforeajusticeofpeacethisinstant。Whereismydaughter，villain？\"\"Sir，\"saidJones，\"Ibegyouwouldbepacified。
Themuff，Iacknowledge，istheyounglady’s；but，uponmyhonour，I
haveneverseenher。\"AtthesewordsWesternlostallpatience，andgrewinarticulatewithrage。
SomeoftheservantshadacquaintedFitzpatrickwhoMr。Westernwas。
ThegoodIrishman，therefore，thinkinghehadnowanopportunitytodoanactofservicetohisuncle，andbythatmeansmightpossiblyobtainhisfavour，steptuptoJones，andcriedout，\"Uponmyconscience，sir，youmaybeashamedofdenyingyourhavingseenthegentleman’sdaughterbeforemyface，whenyouknowIfoundyouthereuponthebedtogether。\"Then，turningtoWestern，heofferedtoconducthimimmediatelytotheroomwherehisdaughterwas；whichofferbeingaccepted，he，thesquire，theparson，andsomeothers，ascendeddirectlytoMrs。Waters’schamber，whichtheyenteredwithnolessviolencethanMr。Fitzpatrickhaddonebefore。
Thepoorladystartedfromhersleepwithasmuchamazementasterror，andbeheldatherbedsideafigurewhichmightverywellbesupposedtohaveescapedoutofBedlam。SuchwildnessandconfusionwereinthelooksofMr。Western；whonosoonersawtheladythanhestartedback，shewingsufficientlybyhismanner，beforehespoke，thatthiswasnotthepersonsoughtafter。
Somuchmoretenderlydowomenvaluetheirreputationthantheirpersons，that，thoughthelatterseemednowinmoredangerthanbefore，yet，astheformerwassecure，theladyscreamednotwithsuchviolenceasshehaddoneontheotheroccasion。However，shenosoonerfoundherselfalonethansheabandonedallthoughtsoffurtherrepose；
and，asshehadsufficientreasontobedissatisfiedwithherpresentlodging，shedressedherselfwithallpossibleexpedition。
Mr。Westernnowproceededtosearchthewholehouse，buttoaslittlepurposeashehaddisturbedpoorMrs。Waters。Hethenreturneddisconsolateintothekitchen，wherehefoundJonesinthecustodyofhisservants。
Thisviolentuproarhadraisedallthepeopleinthehouse，thoughitwasyetscarcelydaylight。Amongthesewasagravegentleman，whohadthehonourtobeinthecommissionofthepeaceforthecountyofWorcester。OfwhichMr。Westernwasnosoonerinformedthanheofferedtolayhiscomplaintbeforehim。Thejusticedeclinedexecutinghisoffice，ashesaidhehadnoclerkpresent，nornobookaboutjusticebusiness；andthathecouldnotcarryallthelawinhisheadaboutstealingawaydaughters，andsuchsortofthings。
HereMr。Fitzpatrickofferedtolendhimhisassistance，informingthecompanythathehadbeenhimselfbredtothelaw。AndindeedhehadservedthreeyearsasclerktoanattorneyinthenorthofIreland，when，chusingagenteelerwalkinlife，hequittedhismaster，cameovertoEngland，andsetupthatbusinesswhichrequiresnoapprenticeship，namely，thatofagentleman，inwhichhehadsucceeded，ashathbeenalreadypartlymentioned。
Mr。Fitzpatrickdeclaredthatthelawconcerningdaughterswasoutofthepresentcase；thatstealingamuffwasundoubtedlyfelony，andthegoodsbeingfoundupontheperson，weresufficientevidenceofthefact。
Themagistrate，upontheencouragementofsolearnedacoadjutor，andupontheviolentintercessionofthesquire，wasatlengthprevailedupontoseathimselfinthechairofjustice，wherebeingplaced，uponviewingthemuffwhichJonesstillheldinhishand，andupontheparson’sswearingittobethepropertyofMr。Western，hedesiredMr。Fitzpatricktodrawupacommitment，whichhesaidhewouldsign。
Jonesnowdesiredtobeheard，whichwasatlast，withdifficulty，grantedhim。HethenproducedtheevidenceofMr。Partridge，astothefindingit；but，whatwasstillmore，SusandeposedthatSophiaherselfhaddeliveredthemufftoher，andhadorderedhertoconveyitintothechamberwhereMr。Joneshadfoundit。
Whetheranaturalloveofjustice，ortheextraordinarycomelinessofJones，hadwroughtonSusantomakethediscovery，Iwillnotdetermine；butsuchweretheeffectsofherevidence，thatthemagistrate，throwinghimselfbackinhischair，declaredthatthematterwasnowaltogetherasclearonthesideoftheprisonerasithadbeforebeenagainsthim。withwhichtheparsonconcurred，saying，theLordforbidheshouldbeinstrumentalincommittinganinnocentpersontodurance。Thejusticethenarose，acquittedtheprisoner，andbrokeupthecourt。
Mr。Westernnowgaveeveryonepresentaheartycurse，and，immediatelyorderinghishorses，departedinpursuitofhisdaughter，withouttakingtheleastnoticeofhisnephewFitzpatrick，orreturninganyanswertohisclaimofkindred，notwithstandingalltheobligationshehadjustreceivedfromthatgentleman。Intheviolence，moreover，ofhishurry，andofhispassion，heluckilyforgottodemandthemuffofJones:Isayluckily；forhewouldhavediedonthespotratherthanhavepartedwithit。
Joneslikewise，withhisfriendPartridge，setforwardthemomenthehadpaidhisreckoning，inquestofhislovelySophia，whomhenowresolvednevermoretoabandonthepursuitof。NorcouldhebringhimselfeventotakeleaveofMrs。Waters；ofwhomhedetestedtheverythoughts，asshehadbeen，thoughnotdesignedly，theoccasionofhismissingthehappiestinterviewwithSophia。towhomhenowvowedeternalconstancy。
AsforMrs。Waters，shetooktheopportunityofthecoachwhichwasgoingtoBath；forwhichplaceshesetoutincompanywiththetwoIrishgentlemen，thelandladykindlylendingherhercloaths；inreturnforwhichshewascontentedonlytoreceiveaboutdoubletheirvalue，asarecompencefortheloan。UpontheroadshewasperfectlyreconciledtoMr。Fitzpatrick，whowasaveryhandsomefellow，andindeeddidallshecouldtoconsolehimintheabsenceofhiswife。
ThusendedthemanyoddadventureswhichMr。JonesencounteredathisinnatUpton，wheretheytalk，tothisday，ofthebeautyandlovelybehaviourofthecharmingSophia，bythenameoftheSomersetshireangel。
Chapter8
InwhichthehistorygoesbackwardBeforeweproceedanyfartherinourhistory，itmaybepropertolookalittleback，inordertoaccountfortheextraordinaryappearanceofSophiaandherfatherattheinnatUpton。
Thereadermaybepleasedtorememberthat，intheninthchapteroftheseventhbookofourhistory，weleftSophia，afteralongdebatebetweenloveandduty，decidingthecause，asitusually，I
believe，happens，infavouroftheformer。
Thisdebatehadarisen，aswehavethereshown，fromavisitwhichherfatherhadjustbeforemadeher，inordertoforceherconsenttoamarriagewithBlifil；andwhichhehadunderstoodtobefullyimpliedinheracknowledgment\"thatsheneithermustnorcouldrefuseanyabsolutecommandofhis。\"
Nowfromthisvisitthesquireretiredtohiseveningpotation，overjoyedatthesuccesshehadgainedwithhisdaughter；and，ashewasofasocialdisposition，andwillingtohavepartakersinhishappiness，thebeerwasorderedtoflowveryliberallyintothekitchen；sothatbeforeelevenintheeveningtherewasnotasinglepersonsoberinthehouseexceptonlyMrs。WesternherselfandthecharmingSophia。
EarlyinthemorningamessengerwasdespatchedtosummonMr。
Blifil；for，thoughthesquireimaginedthatyounggentlemanhadbeenmuchlessacquaintedthanhereallywaswiththeformeraversionofhisdaughter，ashehadnot，however，yetreceivedherconsent，helongedimpatientlytocommunicateittohim，notdoubtingbutthattheintendedbrideherselfwouldconfirmitwithherlips。Astothewedding，ithadtheeveningbeforebeenfixed，bythemaleparties，tobecelebratedonthenextmorningsaveone。
Breakfastwasnowsetforthintheparlour，whereMr。Blifilattended，andwherethesquireandhissisterlikewisewereassembled；
andnowSophiawasorderedtobecalled。
O，Shakespear！hadIthypen！O，Hogarth！hadIthypencil！thenwouldIdrawthepictureofthepoorserving-man，who，withpalecountenance，staringeyes，chatteringteeth，faulteringtongue，andtremblinglimbs，E’ensuchaman，sofaint，sospiritless，Sodull，sodeadinlook，sowoe-begone，DrewPriam’scurtainsinthedeadofnight，Andwouldhavetoldhim，halfhisTroywasburn’d
enteredtheroom，anddeclared-ThatMadamSophiawasnottobefound。
\"Nottobefound！\"criesthesquire，startingfromhischair；
\"Zoundsandd——nation！Bloodandfury！Where，when，how，what-Nottobefound！Where？\"
\"La！brother，\"saidMrs。Western，withtruepoliticalcoldness，\"youarealwaysthrowingyourselfintosuchviolentpassionsfornothing。
Myniece，Isuppose，isonlywalkedoutintothegarden。Iprotestyouaregrownsounreasonable，thatitisimpossibletoliveinthehousewithyou。\"
\"Nay，nay，\"answeredthesquire，returningassuddenlytohimself，ashehadgonefromhimself；\"ifthatbeallthematter，itsignifiesnotmuch；but，uponmysoul，mymindmisgavemewhenthefellowsaidshewasnottobefound。\"Hethengaveordersforthebelltoberunginthegarden，andsathimselfcontentedlydown。
Notwothingscouldbemorethereverseofeachotherthanwerethebrotherandsisterinmostinstances；particularlyinthis，Thatasthebrotherneverforesawanythingatadistance，butwasmostsagaciousinimmediatelyseeingeverythingthemomentithadhappened；
sothesistereternallyforesawatadistance，butwasnotsoquick-sightedtoobjectsbeforehereyes。Ofboththesethereadermayhaveobservedexamples:and，indeed，boththeirseveraltalentswereexcessive；for，asthesisteroftenforesawwhatnevercametopass，sothebrotheroftensawmuchmorethanwasactuallythetruth。
Thiswasnothoweverthecaseatpresent。Thesamereportwasbroughtfromthegardenasbeforehadbeenbroughtfromthechamber，thatMadamSophiawasnottobefound。
Thesquirehimselfnowsalliedforth，andbegantoroarforththenameofSophiaasloudly，andinashoarseavoice，aswhilomedidHerculesthatofHylas；and，asthepoettellsusthatthewholeshoreechoedbackthenameofthatbeautifulyouth，sodidthehouse，thegarden，andalltheneighbouringfieldsresoundnothingbutthenameofSophia，inthehoarsevoicesofthemen，andintheshrillpipesofthewomen；whileechoseemedsopleasedtorepeatthebelovedsound，that，ifthereisreallysuchaperson，IbelieveOvidhathbeliedhersex。
Nothingreignedforalongtimebutconfusion；tillatlastthesquire，havingsufficientlyspenthisbreath，returnedtotheparlour，wherehefoundMrs。WesternandMr。Blifil，andthrewhimself，withtheutmostdejectioninhiscountenance，intoagreatchair。
HereMrs。Westernbegantoapplythefollowingconsolation:
\"Brother，Iamsorryforwhathathhappened；andthatmynieceshouldhavebehavedherselfinamannersounbecomingherfamily；
butitisallyourowndoings，andyouhavenobodytothankbutyourself。Youknowshehathbeeneducatedalwaysinamannerdirectlycontrarytomyadvice，andnowyouseetheconsequence。
HaveInotathousandtimesarguedwithyouaboutgivingmynieceownwill？ButyouknowInevercouldprevailuponyou；andwhenI
hadtakensomuchpainstoeradicateherheadstrongopinions，andtorectifyyourerrorsinpolicy，youknowshewastakenoutofmyhands；
sothatIhavenothingtoanswerfor。HadIbeentrustedentirelywiththecareofhereducation，nosuchaccidentasthishadeverbefallenyou；sothatyoumustcomfortyourselfbythinkingitwasallyourowndoing；and，indeed，whatelsecouldbeexpectedfromsuchindulgence？\"——
\"Zounds！sister，\"answeredhe，\"youareenoughtomakeonemad。HaveIindulgedher？HaveIgivenherherwill？——ItwasnolongeragothanlastnightthatIthreatened，ifshedisobeyedme，toconfinehertoherchamberuponbreadandwateraslongasshelived-Youwouldprovokethepatienceofjob。\"
\"Didevermortalhearthelike？\"repliedshe。\"Brother，ifIhadnotthepatienceoffiftyjobs，youwouldmakemeforgetalldecencyanddecorum。Whywouldyouinterfere？DidInotbegyou，didInotintreatyou，toleavethewholeconducttome？Youhavedefeatedalltheoperationsofthecampaignbyonefalsestep。Wouldanymaninhissenseshaveprovokedadaughterbysuchthreatsasthese？HowoftenhaveItoldyouthatEnglishwomenarenottobetreatedlikeCiracessian*slaves？Wehavetheprotectionoftheworld；wearetobewonbygentlemeansonly，andnottobehectored，andbullied，andbeatintocompliance。IthankHeavennoSaliquelawgovernshere。
Brother，youhavearoughnessinyourmannerwhichnowomanbutmyselfwouldbear。Idonotwondermyniecewasfrightenedandterrifiedintotakingthismeasure；and，tospeakhonestly，Ithinkmyniecewillbejustifiedtotheworldforwhatshehathdone。Irepeatittoyouagain，brother，youmustcomfortyourselfbyrememb’ringthatitisallyourownfault。HowoftenhaveIadvised-\"HereWesternrosehastilyfromhischair，andventingtwoorthreehorridimprecations，ranoutoftheroom。
*PossiblyCircassian。
Whenhewasdeparted，hissisterexpressedmorebitternessifpossibleagainsthimthanshehaddonewhilehewaspresent；forthetruthofwhichsheappealedtoMr。Blifil，who，withgreatcomplacence，acquiescedentirelyinallshesaid；butexcusedallthefaultsofMr。Western，\"astheymustbeconsidered，\"hesaid，\"tohaveproceededfromthetooinordinatefondnessofafather，whichmustbeallowedthenameofanamiableweakness。\"\"Somuchthemoreinexcuseable，\"answeredthelady；\"forwhomdothheruinbyhisfondnessbuthisownchild？\"TowhichBlifilimmediatelyagreed。
Mrs。WesternthenbegantoexpressgreatconfusionontheaccountofMr。Blifil，andoftheusagewhichhehadreceivedfromafamilytowhichheintendedsomuchhonour。Onthissubjectshetreatedthefollyofherniecewithgreatseverity；butconcludedwiththrowingthewholeonherbrother，who，shesaid，wasinexcuseabletohaveproceededsofarwithoutbetterassurancesofhisdaughter’sconsent:\"Buthewassaysshealwaysofaviolent，headstrongtemper；andIcanscarceforgivemyselfforalltheadviceIhavethrownawayuponhim。\"
Aftermuchofthiskindofconversation，which，perhaps，wouldnotgreatlyentertainthereader，wasithereparticularlyrelated，Mr。
Blifiltookhisleaveandreturnedhome，nothighlypleasedwithhisdisappointment:which，however，thephilosophywhichhehadacquiredfromSquare，andthereligioninfusedintohimbyThwackum，togetherwithsomewhatelse，taughthimtobearratherbetterthanmorepassionateloversbearthesekindsofevils。
Chapter9
TheescapeofSophiaItisnowtimetolookafterSophia；whomthereader，ifhelovesherhalfsowellasIdo，willrejoicetofindescapedfromtheclutchesofherpassionatefather，andfromthoseofherdispassionatelover。
Twelvetimesdidtheironregisteroftimebeatonthesonorousbell-metal，summoningtheghoststoriseandwalktheirnightlyround——Inplainerlanguage，itwastwelveo’clock，andallthefamily，aswehavesaid，layburiedindrinkandsleep，exceptonlyMrs。Western，whowasdeeplyengagedinreadingapoliticalpamphlet，andexceptourheroine，whonowsoftlystoledownstairs，and，havingunbarredandunlockedoneofthehouse-doors，salliedforth，andhastenedtotheplaceofappointment。
Notwithstandingthemanyprettyartswhichladiessometimespractise，todisplaytheirfearsoneverylittleoccasionalmostasmanyastheothersexusestoconcealtheirs，certainlythereisadegreeofcouragewhichnotonlybecomesawoman，butisoftennecessarytoenablehertodischargeherduty。Itis，indeed，theideaoffierceness，andnotofbravery，whichdestroysthefemalecharacter；forwhocanreadthestoryofthejustlycelebratedArriawithoutconceivingashighanopinionofhergentlenessandtendernessasofherfortitude？Atthesametime，perhaps，manyawomanwhoshrieksatamouse，orarat，maybecapableofpoisoningahusband；
or，whatisworse，ofdrivinghimtopoisonhimself。
Sophia，withallthegentlenesswhichawomancanhave，hadallthespiritwhichsheoughttohave。When，therefore，shecametotheplaceofappointment，and，insteadofmeetinghermaid，aswasagreed，sawamanridedirectlyuptoher，sheneitherscreamedoutnorfaintedaway:notthatherpulsethenbeatwithitsusualregularity；forshewas，atfirst，undersomesurprizeandapprehension:butthesewererelievedalmostassoonasraised，whentheman，pullingoffhishat，askedher，inaverysubmissivemanner，\"Ifherladyshipdidnotexpecttomeetanotherlady？\"andthenproceededtoinformherthathewassenttoconducthertothatlady。
Sophiacouldhavenopossiblesuspicionofanyfalsehoodinthisaccount:shethereforemountedresolutelybehindthefellow，whoconveyedhersafetoatownaboutfivemilesdistant，whereshehadthesatisfactionoffindingthegoodMrs。Honour:for，asthesoulofthewaiting-womanwaswraptupinthoseveryhabilimentswhichusedtoenwrapherbody，shecouldbynomeansbringherselftotrustthemoutofhersight。Uponthese，therefore，shekeptguardinperson，whileshedetachedtheaforesaidfellowafterhermistress，havinggivenhimallproperinstructions。
Theynowdebatedwhatcoursetotake，inordertoavoidthepursuitofMr。Western，whotheyknewwouldsendaftertheminafewhours。TheLondonroadhadsuchcharmsforHonour，thatshewasdesirousofgoingondirectly；allegingthat，asSophiacouldnotbemissedtilleightorninethenextmorning，herpursuerswouldnotbeabletoovertakeher，eventhoughtheyknewwhichwayshehadgone。
ButSophiahadtoomuchatstaketoventureanythingtochance；nordidshedaretrusttoomuchtohertenderlimbs，inacontestwhichwastobedecidedonlybyswiftness。Sheresolved，therefore，totravelacrossthecountry，foratleasttwentyorthirtymiles，andthentotakethedirectroadtoLondon。So，havinghiredhorsestogotwentymilesoneway，whensheintendedtogotwentymilestheother，shesetforwardwiththesameguidebehindwhomshehadriddenfromherfather’shouse；theguidehavingnowtakenupbehindhim，intheroomofSophia，amuchheavier，aswellasmuchlesslovelyburden；being，indeed，ahugeportmanteau，wellstuffedwiththoseoutsideornaments，bymeansofwhichthefairHonourhopedtogainmanyconquests，and，finally，tomakeherfortuneinLondoncity。
WhentheyhadgoneabouttwohundredpacesfromtheinnontheLondonroad，Sophiarodeuptotheguide，and，withavoicemuchfullerofhoneythanwaseverthatofPlato，thoughhismouthissupposedtohavebeenabee-hive，beggedhimtotakethefirstturningwhichledtowardsBristol。
Reader，Iamnotsuperstitious，noranygreatbelieverofmodernmiracles。Idonot，therefore，deliverthefollowingasacertaintruth；for，indeed，Icanscarcecredititmyself:butthefidelityofanhistorianobligesmetorelatewhathathbeenconfidentlyasserted。
Thehorse，then，onwhichtheguiderode，isreportedtohavebeensocharmedbySophia’svoice，thathemadeafullstop，andexpressedanunwillingnesstoproceedanyfarther。
Perhaps，however，thefactmaybetrue，andlessmiraculousthanithathbeenrepresented；sincethenaturalcauseseemsadequatetotheeffect:for，astheguideatthatmomentdesistedfromaconstantapplicationofhisarmedrightheelfor，likeHudibras，heworebutonespur，itismorethanpossiblethatthisomissionalonemightoccasionthebeasttostop，especiallyasthiswasveryfrequentwithhimatothertimes。
ButifthevoiceofSophiahadreallyaneffectonthehorse，ithadverylittleontherider。Heansweredsomewhatsurlily，\"Thatmeasterhadorderedhimtogoadifferentway，andthatheshouldlosehisplaceifhewentanyotherthanthathewasordered。\"
Sophia，findingallherpersuasionshadnoeffect，begannowtoaddirresistiblecharmstohervoice；charmswhich，accordingtotheproverb，makestheoldmaretrot，insteadofstandingstill；charmstowhichmodernageshaveattributedallthatirresistibleforcewhichtheantientsimputedtoperfectoratory。Inaword，shepromisedshewouldrewardhimtohisutmostexpectation。
Theladwasnottotallydeaftothesepromises；buthedislikedtheirbeingindefinite；for，thoughperhapshehadneverheardthatword，yetthat，infact，washisobjection。Hesaid，\"Gentlevolksdidnotconsiderthecaseofpoorvolks；thathehadliketohavebeenturnedawaytheotherday，forridingaboutthecountrywithagentlemanfromSquireAllworthy’s，whodidnotrewardhimasheshouldhavedone。\"
\"Withwhom？\"saysSophiaeagerly。\"WithagentlemanfromSquireAllworthy’s，\"repeatedthelad；\"thesquire’sson，Ithinktheycall’un。\"-\"Whither？whichwaydidhego？\"saysSophia-\"Why，alittleo’
onesideo’Bristol，abouttwentymilesoff，\"answeredthelad。\"Guideme，\"saysSophia，\"tothesameplace，andI’llgivetheeaguinea，ortwo，ifoneisnotsufficient。\"-\"Tobecertain，\"saidtheboy，\"itishonestlyworthtwo，whenyourladyshipconsiderswhatariskIrun；but，however，ifyourladyshipwillpromisemethetwoguineas，I’lle’enventure:tobecertainitisasinfulthingtorideaboutmymeaster’shorses；butonecomfortis，Icanonlybeturnedaway，andtwoguineaswillpartlymakemeamends。\"
Thebargainbeingthusstruck，theladturnedasideintotheBristolroad，andSophiasetforwardinpursuitofJones，highlycontrarytotheremonstrancesofMrs。Honour，whohadmuchmoredesiretoseeLondonthantoseeMr。Jones:forindeedshewasnothisfriendwithhermistress，ashehadbeenguiltyofsomeneglectincertainpecuniarycivilities，whicharebycustomduetothewaiting-gentlewomaninallloveaffairs，andmoreespeciallyinthoseofaclandestinekind。Thisweimputerathertothecarelessnessofhistemperthantoanywantofgenerosity；butperhapsshederiveditfromthelattermotive。Certainitisthatshehatedhimverybitterlyonthataccount，andresolvedtotakeeveryopportunityofinjuringhimwithhermistress。Itwasthereforehighlyunluckyforher，thatshehadgonetotheverysametownandinnwhenceJoneshadstarted，andstillmoreunluckywassheinhavingstumbledonthesameguide，andonthisaccidentaldiscoverywhichSophiahadmade。
OurtravellersarrivedatHambrook*atthebreakofday，whereHonourwasagainstherwillchargedtoenquiretheroutewhichMr。
Joneshadtaken。Ofthis，indeed，theguidehimselfcouldhaveinformedthem；butSophia，Iknownotforwhatreason，neveraskedhimthequestion。
*ThiswasthevillagewhereJonesmettheQuaker。
WhenMrs。Honourhadmadeherreportfromthelandlord，Sophia，withmuchdifficulty，procuredsomeindifferenthorses，whichbroughthertotheinnwhereJoneshadbeenconfinedratherbythemisfortuneofmeetingwithasurgeonthanbyhavingmetwithabrokenhead。
HereHonour，beingagainchargedwithacommissionofenquiry，hadnosoonerappliedherselftothelandlady，andhaddescribedthepersonofMr。Jones，thanthatsagaciouswomanbegan，inthevulgarphrase，tosmellarat。WhenSophiathereforeenteredtheroom，insteadofansweringthemaid，thelandlady，addressingherselftothemistress，beganthefollowingspeech:\"Goodlack-a-day！whytherenow，whowouldhavethoughtit？Iprotesttheloveliestcouplethatevereyebeheld。I-fackins，madam，itisnowonderthesquirerunonsoaboutyourladyship。Hetoldmeindeedyouwasthefinestladyintheworld，andtobesuresoyoube。Mercyonhim，poorheart！I
bepitiedhim，soIdid，whenheusedtohughispillow，andcallithisdearMadamSophia。IdidallIcouldtodissuadehimfromgoingtothewars:Itoldhimthereweremenenowthatweregoodfornothingelsebuttobekilled，thathadnottheloveofsuchfineladies。\"
\"Sure，\"saysSophia，\"thegoodwomanisdistracted。\"\"No，no，\"criesthelandlady，\"Iamnotdistracted。What，dothyourladyshipthinkI
don’tknowthen？Iassureyouhetoldmeall。\"\"Whatsaucyfellow，\"
criesHonour，\"toldyouanythingofmylady？\"\"Nosaucyfellow，\"
answeredthelandlady，\"buttheyounggentlemanyouenquiredafter，andaveryprettyyounggentlemanheis，andhelovesMadamSophiaWesterntothebottomofhissoul。\"\"Helovemylady！I’dhaveyoutoknow，woman，sheismeatforhismaster。\"-\"Nay，Honour，\"saidSophia，interruptingher，\"don’tbeangrywiththegoodwoman；sheintendsnoharm。\"\"No，marry，don’tI，\"answeredthelandlady，emboldenedbythesoftaccentsofSophia；andthenlaunchedintoalongnarrativetootedioustobeheresetdown，inwhichsomepassagesdroptthatgavealittleoffencetoSophia，andmuchmoretoherwaiting-woman，whohencetookoccasiontoabusepoorJonestohermistressthemomenttheywerealonetogether，saying，\"thathemustbeaverypitifulfellow，andcouldhavenoloveforalady，whosenamehewouldthusprostituteinanalehouse。\"
Sophiadidnotseehisbehaviourinsoverydisadvantageousalight，andwasperhapsmorepleasedwiththeviolentrapturesofhislovewhichthelandladyexaggeratedasmuchasshehaddoneeveryothercircumstancethanshewasoffendedwiththerest；andindeedsheimputedthewholetotheextravagance，orratherebullience，ofhispassion，andtotheopennessofhisheart。
Thisincident，however，beingafterwardsrevivedinhermind，andplacedinthemostodiouscoloursbyHonour，servedtoheightenandgivecredittothoseunluckyoccurrencesatUpton，andassistedthewaiting-womaninherendeavourstomakehermistressdepartfromthatinnwithoutseeingJones。
ThelandladyfindingSophiaintendedtostaynolongerthantillherhorseswereready，andthatwithouteithereatingordrinking，soonwithdrew；whenHonourbegantotakehermistresstotaskforindeedsheusedgreatfreedom，andafteralongharangue，inwhichsheremindedherofherintentiontogotoLondon，andgavefrequenthintsoftheimproprietyofpursuingayoungfellow，sheatlastconcludedwiththisseriousexhortation:\"Forheaven’ssake，madam，considerwhatyouareabout，andwhitheryouaregoing。\"
Thisadvicetoaladywhohadalreadyrodenearfortymiles，andinnoveryagreeableseason，mayseemfoolishenough。Itmaybesupposedshehadwellconsideredandresolvedthisalready；nay，Mrs。Honour，bythehintsshethrewout，seemedtothinkso；andthisIdoubtnotistheopinionofmanyreaders，whohave，Imakenodoubt，beenlongsincewellconvincedofthepurposeofourheroine，andhaveheartilycondemnedherforitasawantonbaggage。
Butinrealitythiswasnotthecase。Sophiahadbeenlatelysodistractedbetweenhopeandfear，herdutyandlovetoherfather，herhatredtoBlifil，hercompassion，andwhyshouldwenotconfessthetruth？herloveforJones；whichlastthebehaviourofherfather，ofheraunt，ofeveryoneelse，andmoreparticularlyofJoneshimself，hadblownintoaflame，thathermindwasinthatconfusedstatewhichmaybetrulysaidtomakeusignorantofwhatwedo，orwhitherwego，orrather，indeed，indifferentastotheconsequenceofeither。
Theprudentandsageadviceofhermaidproduced，however，somecoolreflection；andsheatlengthdeterminedtogotoGloucester，andthencetoproceeddirectlytoLondon。
But，unluckily，afewmilesbeforesheenteredthattown，shemetthehack-attorney，who，asisbeforementioned，haddinedtherewithMr。Jones。Thisfellow，beingwellknowntoMrs。Honour，stoptandspoketoher；ofwhichSophiaatthattimetooklittlenotice，morethantoenquirewhohewas。
But，havinghadamoreparticularaccountfromHonourofthismanafterwardsatGloucester，andhearingofthegreatexpeditionheusuallymadeintravelling，forwhichashathbeenbeforeobserved
hewasparticularlyfamous；recollecting，likewise，thatshehadoverheardMrs。HonourinformhimthattheyweregoingtoGloucester，shebegantofearlestherfathermight，bythisfellow’smeans，beabletotracehertothatcity；wherefore，ifsheshouldtherestrikeintotheLondonroad，sheapprehendedhewouldcertainlybeabletoovertakeher。Shethereforealteredherresolution；and，havinghiredhorsestogoaweek’sjourneyawaywhichshedidnotintendtotravel，sheagainsetforwardafteralightrefreshment，contrarytothedesireandearnestentreatiesofhermaid，andtothenolessvehementremonstrancesofMrs。Whitefield，who，fromgoodbreeding，orperhapsfromgoodnatureforthepooryoungladyappearedmuchfatigued，pressedherveryheartilytostaythateveningatGloucester。
Havingrefreshedherselfonlywithsometea，andwithlyingabouttwohoursthebed，whileherhorsesweregettingready，sheresolutelyleftMrs。Whitefield’saboutelevenatnight，and，strikingdirectlyintotheWorcesterroad，withinlessthanfourhoursarrivedatthatveryinnwherewelastsawher。
Havingthustracedourheroineveryparticularlybackfromherdeparture，tillherarrivalatUpton，weshallinaveryfewwordsbringherfathertothesameplace；who，havingreceivedthefirstscentfromthepost-boy，whoconductedhisdaughtertoHambrook，veryeasilytracedherafterwardstoGloucester；whencehepursuedhertoUpton，ashehadlearnedMr。JoneshadtakenthatrouteforPartridge，tousethesquire’sexpression，lefteverywhereastrongscentbehindhim，andhedoubtednotintheleastbutSophiatravelled，or，ashephrasedit，ran，thesameway。Heusedindeedaverycoarseexpression，whichneednotbehereinserted；asfox-hunters，whoalonewillunderstandit，willeasilysuggestittothemselves。
BOOKXI
CONTAININGABOUTTHREEDAYS
Chapter1
AcrustforthecriticsInourlastinitialchapterwemaybesupposedtohavetreatedthatformidablesetofmenwhoarecalledcriticswithmorefreedomthanbecomesus；sincetheyexact，andindeedgenerallyreceive，greatcondescensionfromauthors。Weshallinthis，therefore，givethereasonsofourconducttothisaugustbody；andhereweshall，perhaps，placetheminalightinwhichtheyhavenothithertobeenseen。
ThiswordcriticisofGreekderivation，andsignifiesjudgment。
HenceIpresumesomepersonswhohavenotunderstoodtheoriginal，andhaveseentheEnglishtranslationoftheprimitive，haveconcludedthatitmeantjudgmentinthelegalsense，inwhichitisfrequentlyusedasequivalenttocondemnation。
Iamratherinclinedtobeofthatopinion，asthegreatestnumberofcriticshathoflateyearsbeenfoundamongstthelawyers。Manyofthesegentlemen，fromdespair，perhaps，ofeverrisingtothebenchinWestminster-hall，haveplacedthemselvesonthebenchesattheplayhouse，wheretheyhaveexertedtheirjudicialcapacity，andhavegivenjudgment，i。e。，condemnedwithoutmercy。
Thegentlemenwould，perhaps，bewellenoughpleased，ifweweretoleavethemthuscomparedtooneofthemostimportantandhonourableofficesinthecommonwealth，and，ifweintendedtoapplytotheirfavour，wewoulddoso；but，aswedesigntodealverysincerelyandplainlytoowiththem，wemustremindthemofanotherofficerofjusticeofmuchlowerrank；towhomastheynotonlypronounce，butexecute，theirownjudgment，theybearlikewisesomeremoteresemblance。
Butinrealitythereisanotherlight，inwhichthesemoderncriticsmay，withgreatjusticeandpropriety，beseen；andthisisthatofacommonslanderer。Ifapersonwhoprysintothecharactersofothers，withnootherdesignbuttodiscovertheirfaults，andtopublishthemtotheworld，deservesthetitleofaslandererofthereputationsofmen，whyshouldnotacritic，whoreadswiththesamemalevolentview，beasproperlystiledtheslandererofthereputationofbooks？
Vicehathnot，Ibelieve，amoreabjectslave；societyproducesnotamoreodiousvermin；norcanthedevilreceiveaguestmoreworthyofhim，norpossiblymorewelcometohim，thanaslanderer。Theworld，Iamafraid，regardsnotthismonsterwithhalftheabhorrencewhichhedeserves；andIammoreafraidtoassignthereasonofthiscriminallenityshowntowardshim；yetitiscertainthatthethieflooksinnocentinthecomparison；nay，themurdererhimselfcanseldomstandincompetitionwithhisguilt:forslanderisamorecruelweaponthanasword，asthewoundswhichtheformergivesarealwaysincurable。Onemethod，indeed，thereisofkilling，andthatthebasestandmostexecrableofall，whichbearsanexactanalogytotheviceheredisclaimedagainst，andthatispoison:ameansofrevengesobase，andyetsohorrible，thatiswasoncewiselydistinguishedbyourlawsfromallothermurders，inthepeculiarseverityofthepunishment。
Besidesthedreadfulmischiefsdonebyslander，andthebasenessofthemeansbywhichtheyareeffected，thereareothercircumstancesthathighlyaggravateitsatrociousquality；foritoftenproceedsfromnoprovocation，andseldompromisesitselfanyreward，unlesssomeblackinfernalmindmayproposearewardinthethoughtsofhavingprocuredtheruinandmiseryofanother。
Shakespearhathnoblytouchedthisvice，whenhesays-
Whostealsmypursestealstrash；’tissomething，nothing；
’Twasmine，’tishis，andhathbeenslavetothousands:
ButhethatfilchesfrommemygoodnameRobsmeofthatwhichnotenricheshim，Butmakesmepoorindeed。
Withallthismygoodreaderwilldoubtlessagree；butmuchofitwillprobablyseemtoosevere，whenappliedtotheslandererofbooks。
Butletitherebeconsideredthatbothproceedfromthesamewickeddispositionofmind，andarealikevoidoftheexcuseoftemptation。
Norshallweconcludetheinjurydonethiswaytobeveryslight，whenweconsiderabookastheauthor’soffspring，andindeedasthechildofhisbrain。
Thereaderwhohathsufferedhismusetocontinuehithertoinavirginstatecanhavebutaveryinadequateideaofthiskindofpaternalfondness。TosuchwemayparodythetenderexclamationofMacduff，\"Alas！Thouhastwrittennobook。\"Buttheauthorwhosemusehathbroughtforthwillfeelthepatheticstrain，perhapswillaccompanymewithtearsespeciallyifhisdarlingbealreadynomore，whileImentiontheuneasinesswithwhichthebigmusebearsaboutherburden，thepainfullabourwithwhichsheproducesit，andlastly，thecare，thefondness，withwhichthetenderfathernourisheshisfavourite，tillitbebroughttomaturity，andproducedintotheworld。
Noristhereanypaternalfondnesswhichseemslesstosavourofabsoluteinstinct，andwhichmaysowellbereconciledtoworldlywisdom，asthis。Thesechildrenmaymosttrulybecalledtherichesoftheirfather；andmanyofthemhavewithtruefilialpietyfedtheirparentinhisoldage:sothatnotonlytheaffection，buttheinterest，oftheauthormaybehighlyinjuredbytheseslanderers，whosepoisonousbreathbringshisbooktoanuntimelyend。
Lastly，theslanderofabookis，intruth，theslanderoftheauthor:for，asnoonecancallanotherbastard，withoutcallingthemotherawhore，soneithercananyonegivethenamesofsadstuff，horridnonsense，&c。，toabook，withoutcallingtheauthorablockhead；which，thoughinamoralsenseitisapreferableappellationtothatofvillain，isperhapsrathermoreinjurioustohisworldlyinterest。
Now，howeverludicrousallthismayappeartosome，others，I
doubtnot，willfeelandacknowledgethetruthofit；nay，may，perhaps，thinkIhavenottreatedthesubjectwithdecentsolemnity；
butsurelyamanmayspeaktruthwithasmilingcountenance。Inreality，todepreciateabookmaliciously，orevenwantonly，isatleastaveryill-naturedoffice；andamorosesnarlingcriticmay，I
believe，besuspectedtobeabadman。
Iwillthereforeendeavour，intheremainingpartofthischapter，toexplainthemarksofthischaracter，andtoshowwhatcriticismI
hereintendtoobviate:forIcanneverbeunderstood，unlessbytheverypersonsheremeant，toinsinuatethattherearenoproperjudgesofwriting，ortoendeavourtoexcludefromthecommonwealthofliteratureanyofthosenoblecriticstowhoselaboursthelearnedworldaresogreatlyindebted。SuchwereAristotle，Horace，andLonginus，amongtheantients，DacierandBossuamongtheFrench，andsomeperhapsamongus；whohavecertainlybeendulyauthorizedtoexecuteatleastajudicialauthorityinforoliterario。
Butwithoutascertainingalltheproperqualificationsofacritic，whichIhavetouchedonelsewhere，IthinkImayveryboldlyobjecttothecensuresofanyonepastuponworkswhichhehathnothimselfread。Suchcensurersasthese，whethertheyspeakfromtheirownguessorsuspicion，orfromthereportandopinionofothers，mayproperlybesaidtoslanderthereputationofthebooktheycondemn。
Suchmaylikewisebesuspectedofdeservingthischaracter，who，withoutassigninganyparticularfaults，condemnthewholeingeneraldefamatoryterms；suchasvile，dull，d——dstuff，&c。，andparticularlybytheuseofthemonosyllablelow；awordwhichbecomesthemouthofnocriticwhoisnotRIGHTHONOURABLE。
Again，thoughtheremaybesomefaultsjustlyassignedinthework，yet，ifthosearenotinthemostessentialparts，oriftheyarecompensatedbygreaterbeauties，itwillsavourratherofthemaliceofaslandererthanofthejudgmentofatruecritictopassaseveresentenceuponthewhole，merelyonaccountofsomeviciouspart。ThisisdirectlycontrarytothesentimentsofHorace:
Verumubipluranitentincarmine，nonegopaucisOffendormaculis，quasautincuriafudit，Authumanaparumcavitnatura——
Butwherethebeauties，moreinnumber，shine，Iamnotangry，whenacasuallineThatwithsometrivialfaultsunequalflows
Acarelesshandorhumanfrailtyshows。
MR。FRANCIS
For，asMartialsays，Aliternonfit，Avite，liber。Nobookcanbeotherwisecomposed。Allbeautyofcharacter，aswellasofcountenance，andindeedofeverythinghuman，istobetriedinthismanner。Cruelindeedwoulditbeifsuchaworkasthishistory，whichhathemployedsomethousandsofhoursinthecomposing，shouldbeliabletobecondemned，becausesomeparticularchapter，orperhapschapters，maybeobnoxioustoveryjustandsensibleobjections。Andyetnothingismorecommonthanthemostrigoroussentenceuponbookssupportedbysuchobjections，which，iftheywererightlytakenandthattheyarenotalways，dobynomeansgotothemeritofthewhole。Inthetheatreespecially，asingleexpressionwhichdothnotcoincidewiththetasteoftheaudience，orwithanyindividualcriticofthataudience，issuretobehissed；andonescenewhichshouldbedisapprovedwouldhazardthewholepiece。Towritewithinsuchsevererulesastheseisasimpossibleastoliveuptosomespleneticopinions:andifwejudgeaccordingtothesentimentsofsomecritics，andofsomeChristians，noauthorwillbesavedinthisworld，andnomaninthenext。
Chapter2
TheadventureswhichSophiametwithafterherleavingUptonOurhistory，justbeforeitwasobligedtoturnaboutandtravelbackwards，hadmentionedthedepartureofSophiaandhermaidfromtheinn；weshallnowthereforepursuethestepsofthatlovelycreature，andleaveherunworthyloveralittlelongertobemoanhisill-luck，orratherhisill-conduct。
Sophiahavingdirectedherguidetotravelthroughbye-roads，acrossthecountry，theynowpassedtheSevern，andhadscarcegotamilefromtheinn，whentheyounglady，lookingbehindher，sawseveralhorsescomingafteronfullspeed。Thisgreatlyalarmedherfears，andshecalledtotheguidetoputonasfastaspossible。
Heimmediatelyobeyedher，andawaytheyrodeafullgallop。Butthefastertheywent，thefasterweretheyfollowed；andasthehorsesbehindweresomewhatswifterthanthosebefore，sotheformerwereatlengthovertaken。AhappycircumstanceforpoorSophia；whosefears，joinedtoherfatigue，hadalmostoverpoweredherspirits；
butshewasnowinstantlyrelievedbyafemalevoice，thatgreetedherinthesoftestmanner，andwiththeutmostcivility。ThisgreetingSophia，assoonasshecouldrecoverherbreath，withlikecivility，andwiththehighestsatisfactiontoherself，returned。
ThetravellerswhojoinedSophia，andwhohadgivenhersuchterror，consisted，likeherowncompany，oftwofemalesandaguide。Thetwopartiesproceededthreefullmilestogetherbeforeanyoneofferedagaintoopentheirmouths；whenourheroine，havingprettywellgotthebetterofherfearbutyetbeingsomewhatsurprizedthattheotherstillcontinuedtoattendher，asshepursuednogreatroad，andhadalreadypassedthroughseveralturnings，accostedthestrangeladyinamostobligingtone，andsaid，\"Shewasveryhappytofindtheywerebothtravellingthesameway。\"Theother，who，likeaghost，onlywantedtobespoketo，readilyanswered，\"Thatthehappinesswasentirelyhers；thatshewasaperfectstrangerinthatcountry，andwassooverjoyedatmeetingacompanionofherownsex，thatshehadperhapsbeenguiltyofanimpertinence，whichrequiredgreatapology，inkeepingpacewithher。\"Morecivilitiespassedbetweenthesetwoladies；forMrs。Honourhadnowgivenplacetothefinehabitofthestranger，andhadfallenintotherear。But，thoughSophiahadgreatcuriositytoknowwhytheotherladycontinuedtotravelonthroughthesamebye-roadswithherself，nay，thoughthisgavehersomeuneasiness，yetfear，ormodesty，orsomeotherconsideration，restrainedherfromaskingthequestion。
Thestrangeladynowlabouredunderadifficultywhichappearsalmostbelowthedignityofhistorytomention。Herbonnethadbeenblownfromherheadnotlessthanfivetimeswithinthelastmile；norcouldshecomeatanyribbonorhandkerchieftotieitunderherchin。
WhenSophiawasinformedofthis，sheimmediatelysuppliedherwithahandkerchiefforthispurpose；whichwhileshewaspullingfromherpocket，sheperhapstoomuchneglectedthemanagementofherhorse，forthebeast，nowunluckilymakingafalsestep，felluponhisfore-legs，andthrewhisfairriderfromhisback。
ThoughSophiacameheadforemosttotheground，shehappilyreceivednottheleastdamage:andthesamecircumstanceswhichhadperhapscontributedtoherfallnowpreservedherfromconfusion；forthelanewhichtheywerethenpassingwasnarrow，andverymuchovergrownwithtrees，sothatthemooncouldhereaffordverylittlelight，andwasmoreover，atpresent，soobscuredinacloud，thatitwasalmostperfectlydark。Bythesemeanstheyounglady’smodesty，whichwasextremelydelicate，escapedasfreefrominjuryasherlimbs，andshewasoncemorereinstatedinhersaddle，havingreceivednootherharmthanalittlefrightbyherfall。
Daylightatlengthappearedinitsfulllustre；andnowthetwoladies，whowereridingoveracommonsidebyside，lookingstedfastlyateachother，atthesamemomentboththeireyesbecamefixed；boththeirhorsesstopt，and，bothspeakingtogether，withequaljoypronounced，theonethenameofSophia，theotherthatofHarriet。
ThisunexpectedencountersurprizedtheladiesmuchmorethanI
believeitwillthesagaciousreader，whomusthaveimaginedthatthestrangeladycouldbenootherthanMrs。Fitzpatrick，thecousinofMissWestern，whomwebeforementionedtohavesalliedfromtheinnafewminutesafterher。
Sogreatwasthesurprizeandjoywhichthesetwocousinsconceivedatthismeetingfortheyhadformerlybeenmostintimateacquaintanceandfriends，andhadlonglivedtogetherwiththeirauntWestern，thatitisimpossibletorecounthalfthecongratulationswhichpassedbetweenthem，beforeeitheraskedaverynaturalquestionoftheother，namely，whithershewasgoing？
Thisatlast，however，camefirstfromMrs。Fitzpatrick；but，easyandnaturalasthequestionmayseem，Sophiafounditdifficulttogiveitaveryreadyandcertainanswer。Shebeggedhercousinthereforetosuspendallcuriositytilltheyarrivedatsomeinn，\"whichIsuppose，\"saysshe，\"canhardlybefardistant；and，believeme，Harriet，Isuspendasmuchcuriosityonmyside；for，indeed，Ibelieveourastonishmentisprettyequal。\"
Theconversationwhichpassedbetweentheseladiesontheroadwas，Iapprehend，littleworthrelating；andlesscertainlywasthatbetweenthetwowaiting-women；fortheylikewisebegantopaytheircomplimentstoeachother。Asfortheguides，theyweredebarredfromthepleasureofdiscourse，theonebeingplacedinthevan，andtheotherobligedtobringuptherear。
Inthisposturetheytravelledmanyhours，tilltheycameintoawideandwell-beatenroad，which，astheyturnedtotheright，soonbroughtthemtoaveryfairpromisinginn，wheretheyallalighted:
butsofatiguedwasSophia，thatasshehadsatherhorseduringthelastfiveorsixmileswithgreatdifficulty，sowasshenowincapableofdismountingfromhimwithoutassistance。Thisthelandlord，whohadholdofherhorse，presentlyperceiving，offeredtoliftherinhisarmsfromhersaddle；andshetooreadilyacceptedthetenderofhisservice。IndeedfortuneseemstohaveresolvedtoputSophiatotheblushthatday，andthesecondmaliciousattemptsucceededbetterthanthefirst；formylandlordhadnosoonerreceivedtheyoungladyinhisarms，thanhisfeet，whichthegouthadlatelyveryseverelyhandled，gaveway，anddownhetumbled；but，atthesametime，withnolessdexteritythangallantry，contrivedtothrowhimselfunderhischarmingburden，sothathealonereceivedanybruisefromthefall；
forthegreatinjurywhichhappenedtoSophiawasaviolentshockgiventohermodestybyanimmoderategrin，which，atherrisingfromtheground，sheobservedinthecountenancesofmostofthebye-standers。Thismadehersuspectwhathadreallyhappened，andwhatweshallnothererelate，fortheindulgenceofthosereaderswhoarecapableoflaughingattheoffencegiventoayounglady’sdelicacy。Accidentsofthiskindwehaveneverregardedinacomicallight；norwillwescrupletosay，thathemusthaveaveryinadequateideaofthemodestyofabeautifulyoungwoman，whowouldwishtosacrificeittosopaltryasatisfactionascanarisefromlaughter。
Thisfrightandshock，joinedtotheviolentfatiguewhichbothhermindandbodyhadundergone，almostovercametheexcellentconstitutionofSophia，andshehadscarcestrengthsufficienttototterintotheinn，leaningonthearmofhermaid。Hereshewasnosoonerseatedthanshecalledforaglassofwater；butMrs。Honour，veryjudiciously，inmyopinion，changeditintoaglassofwine。