Andthissavedhimstillfromthewhimperingweaknessandcruelselfishnessofholdingthatbecausesuchahappinessorsuchavirtuehadnotcomeintohislittlepath,orworkedwellforhim,thereforeitwasnotinthegreatscheme,butwasreducible,whenfoundinappearance,tothebasestelements。Adisappointedmindhehad,butamindtoofirmandhealthyforsuchunwholesomeair。
Leavinghimselfinthedark,itcouldriseintothelight,seeingitshineonothersandhailingit。
Therefore,hesatbeforehisdyingfire,sorrowfultothinkuponthewaybywhichhehadcometothatnight,yetnotstrewingpoisononthewaybywhichothermenhadcometoit。Thatheshouldhavemissedsomuch,andathistimeoflifeshouldlooksofarabouthimforanystafftobearhimcompanyuponhisdownwardjourneyandcheerit,wasajustregret。Helookedatthefirefromwhichtheblazedeparted,fromwhichtheafterglowsubsided,inwhichtheashesturnedgrey,fromwhichtheydroppedtodust,andthought,’HowsoonItooshallpassthroughsuchchanges,andbegone!’
Toreviewhislifewaslikedescendingagreentreeinfruitandflower,andseeingallthebrancheswitheranddropoff,onebyone,ashecamedowntowardsthem。
’Fromtheunhappysuppressionofmyyoungestdays,throughtherigidandunlovinghomethatfollowedthem,throughmydeparture,mylongexile,myreturn,mymother’swelcome,myintercoursewithhersince,downtotheafternoonofthisdaywithpoorFlora,’saidArthurClennam,’whathaveIfound!’