`Ihardlyknowwhattosayaboutit，’shewrites，`orwhattothink。Totellyouthetruth，Helen，Idon’tlikethethoughtofitatall。IfIamtobeMrHattersley’swife，Imusttrytolovehim；
andIdotrywithallmymight；butIhavemadeverylittleprogressyet；
andtheworstsymptomofthecaseis，thatthefurtherheisfrommethebetterlikehim：hefrightensmewithhisabruptmannersandstrangehectoringways，andIdreadthethoughtofmarryinghim。“Thenwhyhaveyouacceptedhim？”youwillask；andIdidn’tknowIhadacceptedhim；butmammatellsmeIhave，andheseemstothinksotoo。Icertainlydidn’tmeantodoso；butIdidnotliketogivehimaflatrefusalforfearmammashouldbegrievedandangryforIknewshewishedmetomarryhim，andIwantedtotalktoherfirstaboutit，soIgavehimwhatIthoughtwasanevasive，halfnegativeanswer；butshesaysitwasasgoodasanacceptance，andhewouldthinkmeverycapriciousifIweretoattempttodrawback——andindeed，Iwassoconfusedandfrightenedatthemoment，IcanhardlytellwhatIsaid。AndnexttimeIsawhim，heaccostedmeinallconfidenceashisacedbride，andimmediatelybegantosettlematterswithmamma。
Ihadnotcouragetocontradictthemthen，andhowcanIdoitnow？Icannot：
theywouldthinkmemad，Besides，mammaissodelightedwiththeideaofthematch；shethinksshehasmanagedsowellforme；andIcannotbeartodisappointher。Idoobjectsometimes，andtellherwhatIfeel，butyoudon’tknowhowshetalks。MrHattersley，youknow，isthesonofarichbanker，andasEstherandIhavenofortunesandWalterverylittle，ourdearmammaisveryanxioustoseeusallwellmarried，thatis，unitedtorichpartners——itisnotmyideaofbeingwellmarried，butshemeansitallforthebest。ShesayswhenIamsafeoffherhandsitwillbesucharelieftohermind；andsheassuresmeitwillbeagoodthingforthefamilyaswellasforme。EvenWalterispleasedattheprospect，andwhenIconfessedmyreluctancetohim，hesaiditwasallchildishnonsense。Doyouthinkitnonsense，Helen？IshouldnotcareifIcouldseeanyprospectofbeingabletoloveandadmirehim，butIcan’t。