Bonaparteknewthatshecomprehendednotasyllable;butheunderstoodthatitistheeye,thetone,theaction,andnotatalltherationalword,thattouchesthelove—chords。Hesawshechangedcolour。
\"Allnight,\"saidBonaparte,\"Ilieawake;Iseenaughtbutthyangeliccountenance。Iopenmyarmstoreceivethee——whereartthou,where?Thouartnotthere!\"saidBonaparte,suitingtheactiontothewords,andspreadingouthisarmsanddrawingthemtohisbreast。
\"Oh,please,Idon’tunderstand,\"saidTrana,\"Iwanttogoaway。\"
\"Yes,yes,\"saidBonaparte,leaningbackinhischair,tohergreatrelief,andpressinghishandsonhisheart,\"sincefirstthyamethystinecountenancewasimpressedhere——whathaveInotsuffered,whathaveInotfelt?Oh,thepangsunspoken,burningasanardentcoalinafieryanduncontaminatedbosom!\"saidBonaparte,bendingforwardagain。
\"DearLord!\"saidTranatoherself,\"howfoolishIhavebeen!Theoldmanhasapaininhisstomach,andnow,asmyauntisout,hehascometometohelphim。\"
ShesmiledkindlyatBonaparte,andpushingpasthim,wenttothebedroom,quicklyreturningwithabottleofreddropsinherhand。
\"Theyareverygoodforbenauwdheid;mymotheralwaysdrinksthem,\"shesaid,holdingthebottleout。
Thefaceinthetrap—doorwasafieryred。Likeatiger—catreadytospring。TantSanniecrouched,withtheshoulderofmuttoninherhand。
ExactlybeneathherstoodBonaparte。Sheroseandclaspedwithbotharmsthebarrelofsaltmeat。
\"What,roseofthedesert,nightingaleofthecolony,thatwiththineamorouslaywhilestthelonesomenight!\"criedBonaparte,seizingthehandthatheldthevonlicsense。Nay,strugglenot!Flyasastrickenfawnintothearmsthatwouldembracethee,thou——\"
Hereastreamofcoldpickle—water,heavywithribsandshoulders,descendingonhisheadabruptlyterminatedhisspeech。Half—blinded,Bonapartelookedupthroughthedropsthathungfromhiseyelids,andsawtheredfacethatlookeddownathim。Withonewildcryhefled。Ashepassedoutatthefrontdoorashoulderofmutton,well—directed,strucktheblackcoatinthesmalloftheback。
\"Bringtheladder!bringtheladder!Iwillgoafterhim!\"criedtheBoer—
woman,asBonaparteBlenkinswildlyfledintothefields……
LateintheeveningofthesamedayWaldokneltonthefloorofhiscabin。
Hebathedthefootofhisdogwhichhadbeenpiercedbyathorn。Thebruisesonhisownbackhadhadfivedaystohealin,and,exceptalittlestiffnessinhismovements,therewasnothingremarkableabouttheboy。
Thetroublesoftheyoungaresoonover;theyleavenoexternalmark。Ifyouwoundthetreeinitsyouththebarkwillquicklycoverthegash;butwhenthetreeisveryold,peelingthebarkoff,andlookingcarefully,youwillseethescartherestill。Allthatisburiedisnotdead。
Waldopouredthewarmmilkoverthelittleswollenfoot;Dosslayveryquiet,withtearsinhiseyes。Thentherewasatapatthedoor。InaninstantDosslookedwideawake,andwinkedthetearsoutfrombetweenhislittlelids。
\"Comein,\"saidWaldo,intentonhiswork;andslowlyandcautiouslythedooropened。
\"Goodevening,Waldo,myboy,\"saidBonaparteBlenkinsinamildvoice,notventuringmorethanhisnosewithinthedoor。\"Howareyouthisevening?\"
Dossgrowledandshowedhislittleteeth,andtriedtorise,buthispawhurthimsohewhined。
\"I’mverytired,Waldo,myboy,\"saidBonaparteplaintively。
Dossshowedhislittlewhiteteethagain。Hismasterwentonwithhisworkwithoutlookinground。Therearesomepeopleatwhosehandsitisbestnottolook。Atlasthesaid:
\"Comein。\"
Bonapartesteppedcautiouslyalittlewayintotheroom,andleftthedooropenbehindhim。Helookedattheboy’ssupperonthetable。
\"Waldo,I’vehadnothingtoeatallday——I’mveryhungry,\"hesaid。
\"Eat!\"saidWaldoafteramoment,bendingloweroverhisdog。
\"Youwon’tgoandtellherthatIamhere,willyou,Waldo?\"saidBonapartemostuneasily。\"You’veheardhowsheusedme,Waldo?I’vebeenbadlytreated;you’llknowyourselfwhatitissomedaywhenyoucan’tcarryonalittleconversationwithaladywithouthavingsaltmeatandpickle—waterthrownatyou。Waldo,lookatme;doIlookasagentlemanshould?\"
Buttheboyneitherlookedupnoranswered,andBonapartegrewmoreuneasy。
\"Youwouldn’tgoandtellherthatIamhere,wouldyou?\"saidBonaparte,whiningly。\"There’snoknowingwhatshewoulddotome。I’vesuchtrustinyou,Waldo;I’vealwaysthoughtyousuchapromisinglad,thoughyoumayn’thaveknownit,Waldo。\"
\"Eat,\"saidtheboy,\"Ishallsaynothing。\"
Bonaparte,whoknewthetruthwhenanotherspokeit,closedthedoor,carefullyputtingonthebutton。Thenhelookedtoseethatthecurtainofthewindowwascloselypulleddown,andseatedhimselfatthetable。Hewassoonmunchingthecoldmeatandbread。Waldokneltonthefloor,bathingthefootwithhandswhichthedoglickedlovingly。Onceonlyheglancedatthetable,andturnedawayquickly。
\"Ah,yes!Idon’twonderthatyoucan’tlookatme,Waldo,\"saidBonaparte;\"myconditionwouldtouchanyheart。Yousee,thewaterwasfatty,andthathasmadeallthesandsticktome;andmyhair,\"saidBonaparte,tenderlytouchingthelittlefringeatthebackofhishead,\"isallcakedoverlikealittleplank;youwouldn’tthinkitwashairatall,\"
saidBonaparte,plaintively。\"Ihadtocreepallalongthestonewallsforfearshe’dseeme,andwithnothingonmyheadbutaredhandkerchief,tiedundermychin,Waldo;andtohideinaslootthewholeday,withnotamouthfuloffood,Waldo。Andshegavemesuchablow,justhere,\"saidBonaparte。
Hehadclearedtheplateofthelastmorsel,whenWaldoroseandwalkedtothedoor。
\"Oh,Waldo,mydearboy,youarenotgoingtocallher,\"saidBonaparte,risinganxiously。
\"Iamgoingtosleepinthewagon,\"saidtheboy,openingthedoor。
\"Oh,wecanbothsleepinthisbed;there’splentyofroom。Dostay,myboy,please。\"
ButWaldosteppedout。
\"Itwassuchalittlewhip,Waldo,\"saidBonaparte,followinghimdeprecatingly。\"Ididn’tthinkitwouldhurtyousomuch。Itwassuchalittlewhip。Iamsureyoudidn’ttakethepeaches。Youaren’tgoingtocallher,Waldo,areyou?\"
Buttheboywalkedoff。
Bonapartewaitedtillhisfigurehadpassedroundthefrontofthewagon—
house,andthenslippedout。Hehidhimselfroundthecorner,butkeptpeepingouttoseewhowascoming。HefeltsuretheboywasgonetocallTantSannie。Histeethchatteredwithinwardcoldashelookedroundintothedarknessandthoughtofthesnakesthatmightbitehim,andthedreadfulthingsthatmightattackhim,andthedeadthatmightariseoutoftheirgravesifhesleptoutinthefieldallnight。Butmorethananhourpassedandnofootstepapproached。
ThenBonapartemadehiswaybacktothecabin。Hebuttonedthedoorandputthetableagainstitand,givingthedogakicktosilencehiswhiningwhenthefootthrobbed,heclimbedintobed。Hedidnotputoutthelight,forfearoftheghost,but,wornoutwiththesorrowsoftheday,wassoonasleephimself。
Aboutfouro’clockWaldo,lyingbetweentheseatsofthehorse—wagon,wasawakenedbyagentletouchonhishead。
Sittingup,heespiedBonapartelookingthroughoneofthewindowswithalightedcandleinhishand。
\"I’mabouttodepart,mydearboy,beforemyenemiesarise,andIcouldnotleavewithoutcomingtobidyoufarewell,\"saidBonaparte。
Waldolookedathim。
\"Ishallalwaysthinkofyouwithaffection\"saidBonaparte。\"Andthere’sthatoldhatofyours,ifyoucouldletmehaveitforakeepsake——\"
\"Takeit,\"saidWaldo。
\"Ithoughtyouwouldsayso,soIbroughtitwithme,\"saidBonaparte,puttingiton。\"TheLordblessyou,mydearboy。Youhaven’tafewshillings——justatrifleyoudon’tneed——haveyou?\"
\"Takethetwoshillingsthatareinthebrokenvase。\"
\"MaytheblessingofmyGodrestuponyou,mydearchild,\"saidBonaparte;
\"mayHeguideandblessyou。Givemeyourhand。\"
Waldofoldedhisarmsclosely,andlaydown。
\"Farewell,adieu!\"saidBonaparte。\"MaytheblessingofmyGodandmyfather’sGodrestonyou,nowandevermore。\"
Withthesewordstheheadandnosewithdrewthemselves,andthelightvanishedfromthewindow。
Afterafewmomentstheboy,lyinginthewagon,heardstealthyfootstepsastheypassedthewagon—houseandmadetheirwaydowntheroad。Helistenedastheygrewfainterandfainter,andatlastdiedawayaltogether,andfromthatnightthefootstepofBonaparteBlenkinswasheardnomoreattheoldfarm。
ENDOfPARTI。
PARTII。
\"Anditwasallplay,andnoonecouldtellwhatithadlivedandworkedfor。Astriving,andastriving,andanendinginnothing。\"
Chapter2。I。TimesandSeasons。
Waldolayonhisstomachonthesand。SinceheprayedandhowledtohisGodinthefuel—housethreeyearshadpassed。
Theysaythatintheworldtocometimeisnotmeasuredoutbymonthsandyears。Neitherisithere。Thesoul’slifehasseasonsofitsown;
periodsnotfoundinanycalendar,timesthatyearsandmonthswillnotscan,butwhichareasdeftlyandsharplycutofffromoneanotherasthesmoothly—arrangedyearswhichtheearth’smotionyieldsus。
Tostrangereyesthesedivisionsarenotevident;buteach,lookingbackatthelittletrackhisconsciousnessilluminates,seesitcutintodistinctportions,whoseboundariesaretheterminationofmentalstates。
Asmandiffersfromman,sodifferthesesouls’years。Themostmateriallifeisnotdevoidofthem;thestoryofthemostspiritualistoldinthem。Anditmaychancethatsome,lookingback,seethepastcutoutafterthisfashion:
I。
Theyearofinfancy,wherefromtheshadowybackgroundofforgetfulnessstartoutpicturesofstartlingclearness,disconnected,butbrightlycoloured,andindeliblyprintedinthemind。Muchthatfollowsfades,butthecoloursofthosebaby—picturesarepermanent。
Thererises,perhaps,awarmsummer’sevening;weareseatedonthedoorstep;wehaveyetthetasteofthebreadandmilkinourmouth,andtheredsunsetisreflectedinourbasin。
Thenthereisadarknight,where,wakingwithafearthatthereissomegreatbeingintheroom,werunfromourownbedtoanother,creepclosetosomelargefigure,andarecomforted。
Thenthereisremembranceofthepridewhen,onsomeone’sshoulder,withourarmsaroundtheirhead,weridetoseethelittlepigs,thenewlittlepigswiththeircurledtailsandtinysnouts——wheredotheycomefrom?
Remembranceofdelightinthefeelandsmellofthefirstorangeweeversee;ofsorrowwhichmakesusputupourlip,andcryhard,whenonemorningwerunouttotryandcatchthedewdrops,andtheymeltandwetourlittlefingers;ofalmightyanddespairingsorrowwhenwearelostbehindthekraals,andcannotseethehouseanywhere。
Andthenonepicturestartsoutmorevividlythanany。
Therehasbeenathunderstorm;theground,asfarastheeyecanreach,iscoveredwithwhitehail;thecloudsaregone,andoverheadadeepblueskyisshowing;faroffagreatrainbowrestsonthewhiteearth。We,standinginawindowtolook,feelthecool,unspeakablysweetwindblowinginonus,andafeelingoflongingcomesoverus——unutterablelonging,wecannottellforwhat。Wearesosmall,ourheadonlyreachesashighasthefirstthreepanes。Welookatthewhiteearth,andtherainbow,andthebluesky;andoh,wewantit,wewant——wedonotknowwhat。Wecryasthoughourheartwasbroken。Whenoneliftsourlittlebodyfromthewindowwecannottellwhatailsus。Werunawaytoplay。
Solooksthefirstyear。
II。
Nowthepicturesbecomecontinuousandconnected。Materialthingsstillrule,butthespiritualandintellectualtaketheirplaces。
Inthedarknightwhenweareafraidweprayandshutoureyes。Wepressourfingersveryharduponthelids,andseedarkspotsmovingroundandround,andweknowtheyareheadsandwingsofangelssenttotakecareofus,seendimlyinthedarkastheymoveroundourbed。Itisveryconsoling。
Inthedaywelearnourletters,andaretroubledbecausewecannotseewhyk—n—o—wshouldbeknow,andp—s—a—l—mpsalm。Theytellusitissobecauseitisso。Wearenotsatisfied;wehatetolearn;welikebettertobuildlittlestonehouses。Wecanbuildthemasweplease,andknowthereasonforthem。
Otherjoystoowehaveincomparablygreatertheneventhebuildingofstonehouses。
Wearerunthroughwithashudderofdelightwhenintheredsandwecomeononeofthosewhitewaxflowersthatliebetweentheirtwogreenleavesflatonthesand。Wehardlydarepickthem,butwefeelcompelledtodoso;andwesmellandsmelltillthedelightbecomesalmostpain。Afterwardwepullthegreenleavessoftlyintopiecestoseethesilkthreadsrunacross。
Beyondthekopjegrowsomepale—green,hairy—leavedbushes。Wearesosmall,theymeetoverourhead,andwesitamongthem,andkissthem,andtheyloveusback;itseemsasthoughtheywerealive。
Onedaywesitthereandlookupatthebluesky,anddownatourfatlittleknees;andsuddenlyitstrikesus,Whoarewe?ThisI,whatisit?
Wetrytolookinuponourselves,andourselfbeatsbackuponourself。
Thenwegetupingreatfearandrunhomeashardaswecan。Wecan’ttellanyonewhatfrightenedus。Weneverquitelosethatfeelingofselfagain。
III。
Andthenanewtimerises。Wearesevenyearsold。Wecanreadnow——readtheBible。BestofallwelikethestoryofElijahinhiscaveatHoreb,andthestillsmallvoice。
Oneday,anotableone,wereadonthekopje,anddiscoverthefifthchapterofMatthew,andreaditallthrough。Itisanewgold—mine。ThenwetucktheBibleunderourarmandrushedhome。Theydidn’tknowitwaswickedtotakeyourthingsagainifsomeonetookthem,wickedtogotolaw,wickedto——!Wearequitebreathlesswhenwegettothehouse;wetellthemwehavediscoveredachaptertheyneverheardof;wetellthemwhatitsays。Theoldwisepeopletellustheyknewallaboutit。Ourdiscoveryisamare’s—nesttothem;buttousitisveryreal。Thetencommandmentsandtheold\"Thoushalt\"wehaveheardaboutlongenoughanddon’tcareaboutit;butthisnewlawsetsusonfire。
Wewilldenyourself。Ourlittlewagonthatwehavemade,wegivetothelittleKaffers。Wekeepquietwhentheythrowsandatus(feeling,oh,sohappy)。Weconscientiouslyputthecrackedteacupforourselvesatbreakfast,andtaketheburntroaster—cake。Wesaveourmoney,andbuythreepenceoftobaccofortheHottentotmaidwhocallsusnames。Weareexoticallyvirtuous。Atnightweareprofoundlyreligious;eventhetickingwatchsays,\"Eternity,eternity!hell,hell,hell!\"andthesilencetalksofGod,andthethingsthatshallbe。
Occasionally,also,unpleasantlyshrewdquestionsbegintobeaskedbysomeone,weknownotwho,whositssomewherebehindourshoulder。Wegettoknowhimbetterafterward。
Nowwecarrythequestionstothegrown—uppeople,andtheygiveusanswers。Wearemoreorlesssatisfiedforthetime。Thegrown—uppeopleareverywise,andtheysayitwaskindofGodtomakehell,andverylovingofHimtosendmenthere;andbesides,hecouldn’thelpHimself,andtheyareverywise,wethink,sowebelievethem——moreorless。
IV。
Thenanewtimecomes,ofwhichtheleadingfeatureis,thattheshrewdquestionsareaskedlouder。Wecarrythemtothegrown—uppeople;theyanswerus,andwearenotsatisfied。
Andnowbetweenusandthedearoldworldofthesensesthespirit—worldbeginstopeepin,andwhollycloudsitover。Whataretheflowerstous?
Theyarefuelwaitingforthegreatburning。Welookatthewallsofthefarmhouseandthematter—of—factsheep—kraals,withthemerrysunshineplayingoverall;anddonotseeit。Butweseeagreatwhitethrone,andhimthatsitsonit。AroundHimstandagreatmultitudethatnomancannumber,harpersharpingwiththeirharps,athousandtimestenthousand,andthousandsofthousands。Howwhitearetheirrobes,washedinthebloodoftheLamb!Andthemusicriseshigher,andrendsthevaultofheavenwithitsunutterablesweetness。Andwe,aswelisten,everandanon,asitsinksonthesweetest,lowestnote,hearagroanofthedamnedfrombelow。
Weshudderinthesunlight。
\"Thetorment,\"saysJeremyTaylor,whosesermonsourfatherreadsaloudintheevening,\"comprisesasmanytormentsasthebodyofmanhasjoints,sinews,arteries,etc。,beingcausedbythatpenetratingandrealfireofwhichthistemporalfireisbutapaintedfire。Whatcomparisonwilltherebebetweenburningforahundredyears’spaceandtobeburningwithoutintermissionaslongasGodisGod!\"
Werememberthesermonthereinthesunlight。Onecomesandaskswhywesittherenoddingsomoodily。Ah,theydonotseewhatwesee。
\"Amoment’stime,anarrowspace,Dividesmefromthatheavenlyplace,Orshutsmeupinhell。\"
SosaysWesley’shymn,whichwesingeveningbyevening。Whatmattersunshineandwalls,menandsheep?
\"Thethingswhichareseenaretemporal,butthethingswhicharenotseenareeternal。\"Theyarereal。
TheBiblewebearalwaysinourbreast;itspagesareourfood;welearntorepeatit;weweepmuch,forinsunshineandinshade,intheearlymorningorthelateevening,inthefieldorinthehouse,thedevilwalkswithus。
Hecomestoarealperson,copper—colouredface,headalittleononeside,foreheadknit,askingquestions。Believeme,itwerebettertobefollowedbythreedeadlydiseasesthanbyhim。Heisneversilenced——withoutmercy。
Thoughthedropsofbloodstandoutonyourhearthewillputhisquestion。
Softlyhecomesup(weareonlyaweebitchild);\"IsitgoodofGodtomakehell?WasitkindofHimtoletnoonebeforgivenunlessJesusChristdied?\"
Thenhegoesoff,andleavesuswrithing。Presentlyhecomesback。
\"DoyouloveHim?\"——waitsalittle。\"DoyouloveHim?Youwillbelostifyoudon’t。\"
Wesaywetryto。
\"Butdoyou?\"Thenhegoesoff。
Itisnothingtohimifwegoquitemadwithfearatourownwickedness。
Heaskson,thequestioningdevil;hecaresnothingwhathesays。Welongtotellsomeone,thattheymayshareourpain。Wedonotyetknowthatthecupofafflictionismadewithsuchanarrowmouththatonlyonelipcandrinkatatime,andthateachman’scupismadetomatchhislip。
Onedaywetrytotellsomeone。Thenagraveheadisshakensolemnlyatus。Wearewicked,verywicked,theysayweoughtnottohavesuchthoughts。Godisgood,verygood。Wearewicked,verywicked。Thatisthecomfortweget。Wicked!Oh,Lord!dowenotknowit?Isitnotthesenseofourownexceedingwickednessthatisdryingupouryoungheart,fillingitwithsand,makingalllifeadust—binforus?
Wicked?Weknowit!Tooviletolive,tooviletodie,tooviletocreepoverthis,God’searth,andmoveamongHisbelievingmen。Hellistheoneplaceforhimwhohateshismaster,andtherewedonotwanttogo。Thisisthecomfortwegetfromtheold。
Andonceagainwetrytoseekforcomfort。Thistimegreateyeslookatuswondering,andlovelylittlelipssay:
\"Ifitmakesyousounhappytothinkofthesethings,whydoyounotthinkofsomethingelse,andforget?\"
Forget!Weturnawayandshrinkintoourself。Forget,andthinkofotherthings!Oh,God!dotheynotunderstandthatthematerialworldisbutafilm,througheveryporeofwhichGod’sawfulspiritworldisshiningthroughonus?Wekeepasfarfromothersaswecan。
Onenight,arareclearmoonlightnight,wekneelinthewindow;everyoneelseisasleep,butwekneelreadingbythemoonlight。Itisachapterintheprophets,tellinghowthechosenpeopleofGodshallbecarriedontheGentiles’shoulders。Surelythedevilmightleaveusalone;thereisnotmuchtohandleforhimthere。Butpresentlyhecomes。
\"Isitrightthereshouldbeachosenpeople?ToHim,whoisfathertoall,shouldnotallbedear?\"
Howcanweanswerhim?Wewerefeelingsogoodtillhecame。WeputourheaddownontheBibleandblisteritwithtears。Thenwefoldourhandsoverourheadandpray,tillourteethgrindtogether。Oh,thatfromthatspirit—world,sorealandyetsosilent,thatsurroundsus,onewordwouldcometoguideus!Weareleftalonewiththisdevil;andGoddoesnotwhispertous。SuddenlyweseizetheBible,turningitroundandround,andsayhurriedly:
\"ItwillbeGod’svoicespeakingtous;Hisvoiceasthoughweheardit。\"
WeyearnforatokenfromtheinexorablySilentOne。
Weturnthebook,putourfingerdownonapage,andbendtoreadbythemoonlight。ItisGod’sanswer。Wetremble。
\"ThenfourteenyearsafterIwentupagaintoJerusalemwithBarnabas,andtookTituswithmealso。\"
Foraninstantourimaginationseizesit;wearetwisting,twirling,tryingtomakeanallegory。Thefourteenyearsarefourteenmonths;wearePaulandthedevilisBarnabas,Titusis——Thenasuddenloathingcomestous:
weareliarsandhypocrites,wearetryingtodeceiveourselves。WhatisPaultous——andJerusalem?WeareBarnabasandTitus?Weknownotthemen。Beforeweknowweseizethebook,swingitroundourhead,andflingitwithallourmighttothefurtherendoftheroom。Weputdownourheadagainandweep。
Youthandignorance;isthereanythingelsethatcanweepso?Itisasthoughthetearsweredropsofbloodcongealedbeneaththeeyelids;nothingelseislikethosetears。Afteralongtimeweareweakwithcrying,andliesilent,andbychanceweknockagainstthewoodthatstopsthebrokenpane。Itfalls。Uponourhotstifffaceasweetbreathofwindblows。Weraiseourhead,andwithourswolleneyeslookoutatthebeautifulstillworld,andthesweetnight—windblowsinuponus,holyandgentle,likealovingbreathfromthelipsofGod。Overusadeeppeacecomes,acalm,stilljoy;thetearsnowflowreadilyandsoftly。Oh,theunutterablegladness!Atlast,atlastwehavefoundit!\"ThepeacewithGod。\"\"Thesenseofsinsforgiven。\"Alldoubtvanished,God’svoiceinthesoul,theHolySpiritfillingus!WefeelHim!WefeelHim!Oh,JesusChrist,throughyou,throughyouthisjoy!Wepressourhandsuponourbreastandlookupwardwithadoringgladness。Softwavesofblissbreakthroughus。
\"ThepeacewithGod。\"\"Thesenseofsinsforgiven。\"Methodistsandrevivalistssaythewords,andthemockingworldshootsoutitslip,andwalksbysmiling——\"Hypocrite。\"
Therearemorefoolsandfewerhypocritesthanthewiseworlddreamsof。
Thehypocriteisrareasicebergsinthetropics;thefoolcommonasbuttercupsbesideawater—furrow:whetheryougothiswayorthatyoutreadonhim;youdarenotlookatyourownreflectioninthewaterbutyouseeone。Thereisnocantphrase,rottenwithage,butitwasthedressofalivingbody;nonebutatheartitsignifiesarealbodilyormentalconditionwhichsomehavepassedthrough。
Afterhoursandnightsoffrenziedfearofthesupernaturaldesiretoappeasethepowerabove,afiercequiveringexcitementineveryinchofnerveandbloodvessel,therecomesatimewhennaturecannotendurelonger,andthespringlongbentrecoils。Wesinkdownemasculated。Upcreepsthedeadlydeliciouscalm。
\"Ihaveblottedoutasacloudthysins,andasathickcloudthytrespasses,andwillrememberthemnomoreforever。\"Weweepwithsofttransportingjoy。
Afewexperiencethis;manyimaginetheyexperienceit,onehereandthereliesaboutit。Inthemain,\"ThepeacewithGod;asenseofsinsforgiven,\"standsforacertainmentalandphysicalreaction。Itsrealitythoseknowwhohavefeltit。
Andwe,onthatmoonlightnight,putdownourheadonthewindow,\"Oh,God!
wearehappy,happy;thychildforever。Oh,thankyou,God!\"andwedropasleep。
NextmorningtheBiblewekiss。WeareGod’sforever。Wegoouttowork,anditgoeshappilyallday,happilyallnight;buthardlysohappily,nothappilyatall,thenextday;andthenextnightthedevilasksus,\"whereisyourHolySpirit?\"
Wecannottell。