Presentlyalittlevessel，withahugeshininglateensail，andbearingtheblueandwhitePortugueseflag，wasseenplayingasortofleap-frogonthejollywaves，jumpingoverthem，andduckingdownasmerryascouldbe。Thislittleboatcametowardsthesteamerasquickasevershecouldjump；andCaptainCooperroaringout，\"Stopher！\"to\"LadyMaryWood，\"herLadyship’spaddlessuddenlyceasedtwirling，andnewswascarriedtothegoodbishopthathisboatwasalmostalongside，andthathishourwascome。
Itwasratheranaffectingsighttoseethepooroldfatgentleman，lookingwistfullyoverthewaterastheboatnowcameup，andhereightseamen，withgreatnoise，energy，andgesticulationlaidherbythesteamer。Thesteamerstepswereletdown；hisLordship’sservant，inblueandyellowlivery（liketheEdinburghReview），castovertheepiscopalluggageintotheboat，alongwithhisownbundleandthejack-bootswithwhichheridespostilionononeofthebishop’sfatmulesatFaro。Theblueandyellowdomesticwentdownthestepsintotheboat。Thencamethebishop’sturn；buthecouldn’tdoitforalongwhile。Hewentfromonepassengertoanother，sadlyshakingthembythehand，oftentakingleaveandseeminglothtodepart，untilCaptainCooper，inasternbutrespectfultone，touchedhimontheshoulder，andsaid，Iknownotwithwhatcorrectness，beingignorantoftheSpanishlanguage，\"Senor’Bispo！Senor’Bispo！\"onwhichsummonsthepooroldman，lookingruefullyroundhimoncemore，puthissquarecapunderhisarm，tuckeduphislongblackpetticoats，soastoshowhispurplestockingsandjollyfatcalves，andwenttremblingdownthestepstowardstheboat。Thegoodoldman！IwishIhadhadashakeofthattremblingpodgyhandsomehowbeforehewentuponhisseamartyrdom。Ifeltaloveforthatsoft-heartedoldChristian。Ah！
letushopehisgovernantetuckedhimcomfortablyinbedwhenhegottoFarothatnight，andmadehimawarmgruelandputhisfeetinwarmwater。Themenclungaroundhim，andalmostkissedhimastheypoppedhimintotheboat，buthedidnotheedtheircaresses。
Awaywenttheboatscuddingmadlybeforethewind。Bang！anotherlateen-sailedboatinthedistancefiredaguninhishonour；butthewindwasblowingawayfromtheshore，andwhoknowswhenthatmeekbishopgothometohisgruel？
Ithinkthesewerethenotablesofourparty。IwillnotmentionthelaughingoglingladyofCadiz，whosemanners，Iverymuchregrettosay，wereagreatdealtoolivelyformysenseofpropriety；northosefairsufferers，hercompanions，wholayonthedeckwithsickly，smilingfemaleresignation：northeheroicchildren，whonosooneratebiscuitthantheywereill，andnosoonerwereillthantheybeganeatingbiscuitagain：butjustalludetooneothermartyr，thekindlieutenantinchargeofthemails，andwhoborehiscrosswithwhatIcan’tbutthinkaverytouchingandnobleresignation。
There’sacertainsortofmanwhosedoomintheworldisdisappointment，——whoexcelsinit，——andwhoselucklesstriumphsinhismeekcareeroflife，Ihaveoftenthought，mustberegardedbythekindeyesabovewithasmuchfavourasthesplendidsuccessesandachievementsofcoarserandmoreprosperousmen。AsIsatwiththelieutenantupondeck，histelescopelaidoverhisleanlegs，andhelookingatthesunsetwithapleased，witheredoldface，hegavemealittleaccountofhishistory。Itakeitheisinnowisedisinclinedtotalkaboutit，simpleasitis：hehasbeenseven-
and-thirtyyearsinthenavy，beingsomewhatmorematureintheservicethanLieutenantPeel，Rear-AdmiralPrincedeJoinville，andothercommanderswhoneednotbementioned。Heisaverywell-
educatedman，andreadsprodigiously，——travels，histories，livesofeminentworthiesandheroes，inhissimpleway。Heisnotintheleastangryathiswantofluckintheprofession。\"WereIaboyto-morrow，\"hesaid，\"Iwouldbeginitagain；andwhenIseemyschoolfellows，andhowtheyhavegotoninlife，ifsomearebetteroffthanIam，Ifindmanyareworse，andhavenocalltobediscontented。\"SohecarriesHerMajesty’smailsmeeklythroughthisworld，waitsuponport-admiralsandcaptainsinhisoldglazedhat，andisasproudofthepennonatthebowofhislittleboat，asifitwereflyingfromthemainmastofathunderingman-of-war。
Hegetstwohundredayearforhisservices，andhasanoldmotherandasisterlivinginEnglandsomewhere，whoIwillwager（thoughhenever，Iswear，saidawordaboutit）haveagoodportionofthisprincelyincome。
IsitbreakingaconfidencetotellLieutenantBundy’shistory？
Letthemotiveexcusethedeed。Itisagood，kind，wholesome，andnoblecharacter。Whyshouldwekeepallouradmirationforthosewhowininthisworld，aswedo，sycophantsasweare？Whenwewriteanovel，ourgreatstupidimaginationscangonofurtherthantomarrytheherotoafortuneattheend，andtofindoutthatheisalordbyright。Oblunderinglickspittlemorality！AndyetI
wouldliketofancysomehappyretributiveUtopiainthepeacefulcloud-land，wheremyfriendthemeeklieutenantshouldfindtheyardsofhisshipmannedashewentonboard，allthegunsfiringanenormoussalute（onlywithouttheleastnoiseorvilesmellofpowder），andhebesalutedonthedeckasAdmiralSirJames，orSirJoseph——ay，orLordViscountBundy，knightofalltheordersabovethesun。
Ithinkthisisasufficient，ifnotacompletecatalogueoftheworthiesonboardthe\"LadyMaryWood。\"Intheweekwewereonboard——itseemedayear，bytheway——wecametoregardtheshipquiteasahome。Wefeltforthecaptain——themostgood-humoured，active，careful，readyofcaptains——afilial，afraternalregard；
fortheprovidor，whoprovidedforuswithadmirablecomfortandgenerosity，agenialgratitude；andforthebrisksteward’slads——
briskinservingthebanquet，sympathisinginhandingthebasin——
everypossiblesentimentofregardandgood-will。Whatwindsblew，andhowmanyknotsweran，areallnoteddown，nodoubt，intheship’slog：andasforwhatshipswesaw——everyoneofthemwiththeirgunnage，tonnage，theirnation，theirdirectionwhithertheywerebound——werenottheseallnoteddownwithsurprisingingenuityandprecisionbythelieutenant，atafamilydeskatwhichhesateverynight，beforeagreatpaperelegantlyandmysteriouslyruledoffwithhislargeruler？Ihavearegardforeverymanonboardthatship，fromthecaptaindowntothecrew——downeventothecook，withtattooedarms，sweatingamongthesaucepansinthegalley，whoused（withatouchingaffection）tosenduslocksofhishairinthesoup。Andso，whileourfeelingsandrecollectionsarewarm，letusshakehandswiththisknotofgoodfellows，comfortablyfloatingaboutintheirlittleboxofwoodandiron，acrossChannel，BiscayBay，andtheAtlantic，fromSouthamptonWatertoGibraltarStraits。
CHAPTERIV：GIBRALTAR
SupposeallthenationsoftheearthtosendfittingambassadorstorepresentthematWappingorPortsmouthPoint，witheach，underitsownnationalsignboardandlanguage，itsappropriatehouseofcall，andyourimaginationmayfiguretheMainStreetofGibraltar：
almosttheonlypartofthetown，Ibelieve，whichboastsofthenameofstreetatall，theremaininghouserowsbeingmodestlycalledlanes，suchasBombLane，BatteryLane，FuseeLane，andsoon。InMainStreettheJewspredominate，theMoorsabound；andfromthe\"JollySailor，\"orthebrave\"HorseMarine，\"wherethepeopleofournationaredrinkingBritishbeerandgin，youhearchorusesof\"Garryowen\"or\"TheLassIleftbehindme；\"whilethroughtheflaringlatticesoftheSpanishventascometheclatterofcastanetsandthejingleandmoanofSpanishguitarsandditties。Itisacurioussightateveningthisthrongedstreet，withthepeople，inahundreddifferentcostumes，bustlingtoandfrounderthecoarseflareofthelamps；swarthyMoors，inwhiteorcrimsonrobes；darkSpanishsmugglersintuftedhats，withgaysilkhandkerchiefsroundtheirheads；fuddledseamenfrommen-of-war，ormerchantmen；porters，GalicianorGenoese；andateveryfewminutes’interval，littlesquadsofsoldierstrampingtorelieveguardatsomeoneoftheinnumerablepostsinthetown。
SomeofourpartywenttoaSpanishventa，asamoreconvenientorromanticplaceofresidencethananEnglishhouse；othersmadechoiceoftheclub-houseinCommercialSquare，ofwhichIformedanagreeablepictureinmyimagination；rather，perhaps，resemblingtheJuniorUnitedServiceClubinCharlesStreet，bywhicheveryLondonerhaspassederethiswithrespectfulpleasure，catchingglimpsesofmagnificentblazingcandelabras，underwhichsitneathalf-payofficers，drinkinghalf-pintsofport。Theclub-houseofGibraltarisnot，however，oftheCharlesStreetsort：itmayhavebeencheerfulonce，andthereareyetrelicsofsplendouraboutit。
Whenofficersworepigtails，andinthetimeofGovernorO’Hara，itmayhavebeenahandsomeplace；butitismouldyanddecrepitnow；
andthoughhisExcellency，Mr。Bulwer，waslivingthere，andmadenocomplaintsthatIheardof，otherlessdistinguishedpersonsthoughttheyhadreasontogrumble。Indeed，whatistravellingmadeof？Atleasthalfitspleasuresandincidentscomeoutofinns；andofthemthetouristcanspeakwithmuchmoretruthandvivacitythanofhistoricalrecollectionscompiledoutofhistories，orfilchedoutofhandbooks。Buttospeakofthebestinninaplaceneedsnoapology：that，atleast，isusefulinformation。AseverypersonintendingtovisitGibraltarcannothaveseentheflea-bittencountenancesofourcompanions，whofledfromtheirSpanishventatotakerefugeattheclubthemorningafterourarrival，theymaysurelybethankfulforbeingdirectedtothebesthouseofaccommodationinoneofthemostunromantic，uncomfortable，andprosaicoftowns。
Ifonehadarighttobreakthesacredconfidenceofthemahogany，IcouldentertainyouwithmanyqueerstoriesofGibraltarlife，gatheredfromthelipsofthegentlemenwhoenjoyedthemselvesroundthedingytableclothoftheclub-housecoffee-room，richlydecoratedwithcoldgravyandspiltbeer。Iheardtheretheverynamesofthegentlemenwhowrotethefamouslettersfromthe\"Warspite\"regardingtheFrenchproceedingsatMogador；andmetseveralrefugeeJewsfromthatplace，whosaidthattheyweremuchmoreafraidoftheKabyleswithoutthecitythanofthegunsoftheFrenchsquadron，ofwhichtheyseemedtomakeratherlight。I
heardthelastoddsontheensuingmatchbetweenCaptainSmith’sb。
g。Bolter，andCaptainBrown’sch。c。Roarer：howthegun-roomofHerMajesty’sship\"Purgatory\"had\"cobbed\"atradesmanofthetown，andoftherowinconsequence。IheardcapitalstoriesofthewayinwhichWilkinshadescapedtheguard，andThompsonhadbeenlockedupamongthemosquitoesforbeingoutaftertenwithoutthelantern。Iheardhowthegovernorwasanold-，buttosaywhat，wouldbebreakingaconfidence：onlythismaybedivulged，thattheepithetwasexceedinglycomplimentarytoSirRobertWilson。Allthewhiletheseconversationsweregoingon，astrangesceneofnoiseandbustlewaspassinginthemarket-place，infrontofthewindow，whereMoors，Jews，Spaniards，soldierswerethronginginthesun；andaraggedfatfellow，mountedonatobacco-barrel，withhishatcockedonhisear，washoldinganauction，androaringwithanenergyandimpudencethatwouldhavedonecredittoCoventGarden。
TheMoorishcastleistheonlybuildingabouttheRockwhichhasanairatallpicturesqueorromantic；thereisaplainRomanCatholiccathedral，ahideousnewProtestantchurchofthecigar-divanarchitecture，andaCourt-housewithaporticowhichissaidtobeanimitationoftheParthenon：theancientreligionshousesoftheSpanishtownaregone，orturnedintomilitaryresidences，andmaskedsothatyouwouldneverknowtheirformerpiousdestination。
Youwalkthroughnarrowwhitewashedlanes，bearingsuchmartialnamesasarebeforementioned，andby-streetswithbarracksoneitherside：smallNewgate-likelookingbuildings，atthedoorsofwhichyoumayseethesergeants’ladiesconversing；orattheopenwindowsoftheofficers’quarters，EnsignFippslyingonhissofaandsmokinghiscigar，orLieutenantSimsonpractisingtheflutetowhileawaythewearyhoursofgarrisondulness。Iwassurprisednottofindmorepersonsinthegarrisonlibrary，whereisamagnificentreading-room，andanadmirablecollectionofbooks。
Inspiteofthescantyherbageandthedustonthetrees，theAlamedaisabeautifulwalk；ofwhichthevegetationhasbeenaslaboriouslycaredforasthetremendousfortificationswhichflankitoneitherside。ThevastRockrisesononesidewithitsinterminableworksofdefence，andGibraltarBayisshiningontheother，outonwhichfromtheterracesimmensecannonareperpetuallylooking，surroundedbyplantationsofcannon-ballsandbedsofbomb-shells，sufficient，onewouldthink，toblowawaythewholepeninsula。Thehorticulturalandmilitarymixtureisindeedveryqueer：hereandtheretemples，rusticsummer-seats，&c。havebeenerectedinthegarden，butyouaresuretoseeagreatsquatmortarlookupfromamongtheflower-pots：andamidstthealoesandgeraniumssproutsthegreenpetticoatandscarletcoatofaHighlander。Fatigue-partiesareseenwindingupthehill，andbusyabouttheendlesscannon-ballplantations；awkwardsquadsaredrillingintheopenspaces：sentriesmarchingeverywhere，and（thisisacautiontoartists）Iamtoldhaveorderstorunanymanthroughwhoisdiscoveredmakingasketchoftheplace。Itisalwaysbeautiful，especiallyatevening，whenthepeoplearesaunteringalongthewalks，andthemoonisshiningonthewatersofthebayandthehillsandtwinklingwhitehousesoftheoppositeshore。Thentheplacebecomesquiteromantic：itistoodarktoseethedustonthedriedleaves；thecannon-ballsdonotintrudetoomuch，buthavesubsidedintotheshade；theawkwardsquadsareinbed；eventheloungersaregone，thefan-flirtingSpanishladies，thesallowblack-eyedchildren，andthetrimwhite-jacketeddandies。Afifeisheardfromsomecraftatroostonthequietwaterssomewhere；orafaintcheerfromyonderblacksteamerattheMole，whichisabouttosetoutonsomenightexpedition。YouforgetthatthetownisatalllikeWapping，anddeliveryourselfupentirelytoromance；thesentrieslooknoblepacingthere，silentinthemoonlight，andSandy’svoiceisquitemusicalashechallengeswitha\"Whogoesthere？\"
\"All’sWell\"isverypleasantwhensungdecentlyintune，andinspiresnobleandpoeticideasofduty，courage，anddanger：butwhenyouhearitshoutedallthenightthrough，accompaniedbyaclappingofmusketsinatimeofprofoundpeace，thesentinel’scrybecomesnomoreromantictothehearerthanitistothesandyConnaught-manorthebare-leggedHighlanderwhodeliversit。ItisbesttoreadaboutwarscomfortablyinHarryLorrequerorScott’snovels，inwhichknightsshouttheirwar-cries，andjovialIrishbayoneteershurrah，withoutdeprivingyouofanyblessedrest。Menofadifferentwayofthinking，however，cansuitthemselvesperfectlyatGibraltar；wherethereismarchingandcounter-
marching，challengingandrelievingguardallthenightthrough。
AndnothereinCommercialSquarealone，butalloverthehugeRockinthedarkness——allthroughthemysteriouszig-zags，androundthedarkcannon-ballpyramids，andalongthevastrock-galleries，anduptothetopmostflagstaff，wherethesentrycanlookoutovertwoseas，poorfellowsaremarchingandclappingmuskets，andcrying\"All’sWell，\"dressedincapandfeather，inplaceofhonestnightcapsbestbefittingthedecenthoursofsleep。
Allthesemartialnoisesthreeofusheardtotheutmostadvantage，lyingonironbedsteadsatthetimeinacrackedoldroomontheground-floor，theopenwindowsofwhichlookedintothesquare。Nospotcouldbemorefavourablyselectedforwatchingthehumoursofagarrisontownbynight。Aboutmidnight，thedoorhardbyuswasvisitedbyapartyofyoungofficers，whohavinghadquiteasmuchdrinkaswasgoodforthem，werenaturallyinclinedformore；andwhenweremonstratedthroughthewindows，oneoftheminayoungtipsyvoiceaskedafterourmothers，andfinallyreeledaway。Howcharmingistheconversationofhigh-spiritedyouth！Idon’tknowwhethertheguardgotholdofthem：butcertainlyifacivilianhadbeenhiccupingthroughthestreetsatthathour，hewouldhavebeencarriedofftotheguard-house，andlefttothemercyofthemosquitoesthere，andhadupbeforetheGovernorinthemorning。
Theyoungmaninthecoffee-roomtellsmehegoestosleepeverynightwiththekeysofGibraltarunderhispillow。Itisanawfulimage，andsomehowcompletesthenotionoftheslumberingfortress。
FancySirRobertWilson，hisnosejustvisibleoverthesheets，hisnight-capandthehugekey（youseetheveryidenticaloneinReynolds’sportraitofLordHeathfield）peepingoutfromunderthebolster！
IfIentertainyouwithaccountsofinnsandnightcapsitisbecauseIammorefamiliarwiththesesubjectsthanwithhistoryandfortifications：asfarasIcanunderstandtheformer，GibraltaristhegreatBritishdepotforsmugglinggoodsintothePeninsula。Youseevesselslyingintheharbour，andaretoldinsomanywordstheyaresmugglers：allthosesmartSpaniardswithcigarandmantlesaresmugglers，andruntobaccosandcottonintoCatalonia；alltherespectedmerchantsoftheplacearesmugglers。
TheotherdayaSpanishrevenuevesselwasshottodeathunderthethunderinggreatgunsofthefort，forneglectingtobringto，butitsohappenedthatitwasinchaseofasmuggler：inthislittlecornerofherdominionsBritainproclaimswartocustom-houses，andprotectiontofreetrade。Perhapsereaverylongday，Englandmaybeactingthatparttowardstheworld，whichGibraltarperformstowardsSpainnow；andthelastwarinwhichweshalleverengagemaybeacustom-housewar。ForonceestablishrailroadsandabolishpreventivedutiesthroughEurope，andwhatistherelefttofightfor？Itwillmatterverylittlethenunderwhatflagpeoplelive，andforeignministersandambassadorsmayenjoyadignifiedsinecure；thearmywillrisetotherankofpeacefulconstables，nothavinganymoreusefortheirbayonetsthanthoseworthypeoplehavefortheirweaponsnowwhoaccompanythelawatassizesunderthenameofjavelin-men。Theapparatusofbombsandeighty-four-
poundersmaydisappearfromtheAlameda，andthecropsofcannon-
ballswhichnowgrowtheremaygiveplacetootherplantsmorepleasanttotheeye；andthegreatkeyofGibraltarmaybeleftinthegateforanybodytoturnatwill，andSirRobertWilsonmaysleepinquiet。
IamafraidIthoughtitwasratherarelease，when，havingmadeupourmindstoexaminetheRockindetailandviewthemagnificentexcavationsandgalleries，theadmirationofallmilitarymen，andtheterrorofanyenemieswhomayattackthefortress，wereceivedorderstoembarkforthwithinthe\"Tagus，\"whichwastoearlyustoMaltaandConstantinople。SowetookleaveofthisfamousRock——
thisgreatblunderbuss——whichweseizedoutofthehandsofthenaturalownersahundredandfortyyearsago，andwhichwehavekepteversincetremendouslyloadedandcleanedandreadyforuse。
Toseizeandhaveitisdoubtlessagallantthing；itislikeoneofthosetestsofcouragewhichonereadsofinthechivalrousromances，when，forinstance，SirHuonofBordeauxiscalledupontoprovehisknighthoodbygoingtoBabylonandpullingouttheSultan’sbeardandfrontteethinthemidstofhisCourtthere。
But，afterall，justicemustconfessitwasratherhardonthepoorSultan。IfwehadtheSpaniardsestablishedatLand’sEnd，withimpregnableSpanishfortificationsonSt。Michael’sMount，weshouldperhapscometothesameconclusion。Meanwhileletushope，duringthislongperiodofdeprivation，theSultanofSpainisreconciledtothelossofhisfrontteethandbristlingwhiskers——
letuseventrytothinkthatheisbetterwithoutthem。Atallevents，rightorwrong，whatevermaybeourtitletotheproperty，thereisnoEnglishmanbutmustthinkwithprideofthemannerinwhichhiscountrymenhavekeptit，andofthecourage，endurance，andsenseofdutywithwhichstoutoldEliottandhiscompanionsresistedCrillonandtheSpanishbatteringshipsandhisfiftythousandmen。Thereseemstobesomethingmorenobleinthesuccessofagallantresistancethanofanattack，howeverbrave。
Afterfailinginhisattackonthefort，theFrenchGeneralvisitedtheEnglishCommanderwhohadfoiledhim，andpartedfromhimandhisgarrisoninperfectpolitenessandgood-humour。TheEnglishtroops，Drinkwatersays，gavehimthunderingcheersashewentaway，andtheFrenchinreturncomplimentedusonourgallantry，andlaudedthehumanityofourpeople。Ifwearetogoonmurderingeachotherintheold-fashionedway，whatapityitisthatourbattlescannotendintheold-fashionedwaytoo！
Oneofourfellow-travellers，whohadwrittenabook，andhadsufferedconsiderablyfromsea-sicknessduringourpassagealongthecoastsofFranceandSpain，consoledusallbysayingthattheveryminutewegotintotheMediterraneanwemightconsiderourselvesentirelyfreefromillness；and，infact，thatitwasunheardofintheInlandSea。EvenintheBayofGibraltarthewaterlookedbluerthananythingIhaveeverseen——exceptMissSmith’seyes。Ithought，somehow，thedeliciousfaultlessazurenevercouldlookangry——justliketheeyesbeforealludedto——andunderthisassurancewepassedtheStrait，andbegancoastingtheAfricanshorecalmlyandwithouttheleastapprehension，asifwewereasmuchusedtothetempestasMr。T。P。Cooke。
Butwhen，inspiteofthepromiseofthemanwhohadwrittenthebook，wefoundourselvesworsethanintheworstpartoftheBayofBiscay，oroffthestorm-lashedrocksofFinisterre，wesetdowntheauthorinquestionasagrossimpostor，andhadamindtoquarrelwithhimforleadingusintothiscruelerror。Themostprovokingpartofthematter，too，was，thattheskywasdeliciouslyclearandcloudless，theairbalmy，theseasoinsultinglybluethatitseemedasifwehadnorighttobeillatall，andthattheinnumerablelittlewavesthatfriskedroundaboutourkeelwereenjoyingananerithmongelasma（thisisoneofmyfourGreekquotations：dependonitIwillmanagetointroducetheotherthreebeforethetourisdone）——seemedtobeenjoying，Isay，theabove-namedGreekquotationatourexpense。HereisthedismallogofWednesday，4thofSeptember：——\"Allattemptsatdiningveryfruitless。Basinsinrequisition。Windhardahead。Quediableallais-jefairedanscettegalere？Writingorthinkingimpossible：
soread’LettersfromtheAEgean。’\"Thesebriefwordsgive，I
think，acompleteideaofwretchedness，despair，remorse，andprostrationofsoulandbody。TwodayspreviouslywepassedthefortsandmolesandyellowbuildingsofAlgiers，risingverystatelyfromthesea，andskirtedbygloomypurplelinesofAfricanshore，withfiressmokinginthemountains，andlonelysettlementshereandthere。
Onthe5th，totheinexpressiblejoyofall，wereachedValetta，theentrancetotheharbourofwhichisoneofthemoststatelyandagreeablesceneseveradmiredbysea-sicktraveller。Thesmallbasinwasbusywithahundredships，fromthehugeguard-ship，whichliesthereacityinitself；——merchantmenloadingandcrewscheering，underalltheflagsoftheworldflauntinginthesunshine；ahalf-scoreofbusyblacksteamersperpetuallycomingandgoing，coalingandpainting，andpuffingandhissinginandoutofharbour；slimmen-of-war’sbargesshootingtoandfro，withlongshiningoarsflashinglikewingsoverthewater；hundredsofpaintedtown-boats，withhighheadsandwhiteawnings，——downtothelittletubsinwhichsomenaked，tawnyyoungbeggarscamepaddlinguptothesteamer，entreatingustoletthemdiveforhalfpence。
Roundthisbusybluewaterriserocks，blazinginsunshine，andcoveredwitheveryimaginabledeviceoffortification；totheright，St。Elmo，withflagandlighthouse；andopposite，theMilitaryHospital，lookinglikeapalace；andallround，thehousesofthecity，foritssizethehandsomestandmoststatelyintheworld。
Nordoesitdisappointyouonacloserinspection，asmanyaforeigntowndoes。Thestreetsarethrongedwithalivelycomfortable-lookingpopulation；thepoorseemtoinhabithandsomestonepalaces，withbalconiesandprojectingwindowsofheavycarvedstone。Thelightsandshadows，thecriesandstenches，thefruit-shopsandfish-stalls，thedressesandchatterofallnations；thesoldiersinscarlet，andwomeninblackmantillas；thebeggars，boat-men，barrelsofpickledherringsandmacaroni；theshovel-hattedpriestsandbeardedcapuchins；thetobacco，grapes，onions，andsunshine；thesignboards，bottled-porterstores，thestatuesofsaintsandlittlechapelswhichjostlethestranger’seyesashegoesupthefamousstairsfromtheWater-gate，makeasceneofsuchpleasantconfusionandlivelinessasIhaveneverwitnessedbefore。Andtheeffectofthegroupsofmultitudinousactorsinthisbusycheerfuldramaisheightened，asitwere，bythedecorationsofthestage。Theskyisdelightfullybrilliant；
allthehousesandornamentsarestately；castleandpalacesarerisingallaround；andtheflag，towers，andwallsofFortSt。Elmolookasfreshandmagnificentasiftheyhadbeenerectedonlyyesterday。
TheStradaRealehasamuchmorecourtlyappearancethanthatonedescribed。Herearepalaces，churches，court-housesandlibraries，thegenteelLondonshops，andthelatestarticlesofperfumery。
Gayyoungofficersarestrollingaboutinshell-jacketsmuchtoosmallforthem：midshipmenareclatteringbyonhiredhorses；
squadsofpriests，habitedafterthefashionofDonBasiliointheopera，aredemurelypacingtoandfro；professionalbeggarsrunshriekingafterthestranger；andagentsforhorses，forinns，andforworseplacesstill，followhimandinsinuatetheexcellenceoftheirgoods。Thehouseswheretheyaresellingcarpet-bagsandpomatumwerethepalacesofthesuccessorsofthegoodliestcompanyofgallantknightstheworldeverheardtellof。Itseemsunromantic；butTHESEwerenottheromanticKnightsofSt。John。
TheheroicdaysoftheOrderendedasthelastTurkishgalleyliftedanchorafterthememorablesiege。Thepresentstatelyhouseswerebuiltintimesofpeaceandsplendouranddecay。I
doubtwhethertheAubergedeProvence，wherethe\"UnionClub\"
flourishesnow，haseverseenanythingmoreromanticthanthepleasantballsheldinthegreatroomthere。
TheChurchofSt。John，notahandsomestructurewithout，ismagnificentwithin：anoblehallcoveredwitharichembroideryofgildedcarving，thechapelsofthedifferentnationsoneitherside，butnotinterferingwiththemainstructure，ofwhichthewholeissimple，andthedetailsonlysplendid；itseemedtomeafittingplaceforthiswealthybodyofaristocraticsoldiers，whomadetheirdevotionsasitwereonparade，and，thoughontheirknees，neverforgottheirepauletsortheirquartersofnobility。
Thismixtureofreligionandworldlyprideseemsincongruousatfirst；buthavewenotatchurchathomesimilarrelicsoffeudalceremony？——thevergerwiththesilvermacewhoprecedesthevicartothedesk；thetwochaplainsofmyLordArchbishop，whobowoverhisGraceasheentersthecommunion-tablegate；evenpoorJohn，whofollowsmyLadywithacoronetedprayer-book，andmakeshiscongeashehandsitintothepew。Whatachivalrousabsurdityisthebannerofsomehighandmightyprince，hangingoverhisstallinWindsorChapel，whenyouthinkofthepurposeforwhichmenaresupposedtoassemblethere！TheChurchoftheKnightsofSt。JohnispavedoverwithsprawlingheraldicdevicesofthedeadgentlemenofthedeadOrder；asif，inthenextworld，theyexpectedtotakerankinconformitywiththeirpedigrees，andwouldbemarshalledintoheavenaccordingtotheordersofprecedence。Cumbroushandsomepaintingsadornthewallsandchapels，decoratedwithpompousmonumentsofGrandMasters。Beneathisacrypt，wheremoreofthesehonourableandreverendwarriorslie，inastatethataSimpsonwouldadmire。Inthealtararesaidtoliethreeofthemostgallantrelicsintheworld：thekeysofAcre，Rhodes，andJerusalem。Whatbloodwasshedindefendingtheseemblems！Whatfaith，endurance，genius，andgenerosity；whatpride，hatred，ambition，andsavagelustofbloodwererousedtogetherfortheirguardianship！
IntheloftyhallsandcorridorsoftheGovernor’shouse，someportraitsofthelateGrandMastersstillremain：averyfineone，byCaravaggio，ofaknightingiltarmour，hangsinthedining-
room，nearafull-lengthofpoorLouisXVI。，inRoyalrobes，theverypictureofuneasyimpotency。ButtheportraitofDeVignacourtistheonlyonewhichhasarespectableair；theotherchiefsofthefamousSocietyarepompousoldgentlemeninblack，withhugeperiwigs，andcrownsroundtheirhats，andacoupleofmelancholypagesinyellowandred。ButpagesandwigsandGrandMastershavealmostfadedoutofthecanvas，andarevanishingintoHadeswithamostmelancholyindistinctness。Thenamesofmostofthesegentlemen，however，liveasyetinthefortsoftheplace，whichallseemtohavebeeneagertobuildandchristen：sothatitseemsasif，intheMaltamythology，theyhadbeenturnedintofreestone。
InthearmouryistheverysuitpaintedbyCaravaggio，bythesideofthearmourofthenobleoldLaValette，whoseheroismsavedhisislandfromtheeffortsofMustaphaandDragut，andanarmyquiteasfierceandnumerousasthatwhichwasbaffledbeforeGibraltar，bysimilarcourageandresolution。Theswordofthelast-namedfamouscorsair（amosttruculentlittlescimitar），thousandsofpikesandhalberts，littleoldcannonsandwall-pieces，helmetsandcuirasses，whichtheknightsortheirpeoplewore，aretrimlyarrangedagainstthewall，and，insteadofspikingTurksorarmingwarriors，nowservetopointmoralsandadorntales。Andherelikewisearekeptmanythousandmuskets，swords，andboarding-pikesfordailyuse，andacoupleofraggedoldstandardsofoneoftheEnglishregiments，whopursuedandconqueredinEgypttheremainsofthehaughtyandfamousFrenchrepublicanarmy，atwhoseappearancethelastknightsofMaltaflungopenthegatesofalltheirfortresses，andconsentedtobeextinguishedwithoutsomuchasaremonstrance，orakick，orastruggle。
Wetookadriveintowhatmaybecalledthecountry；wherethefieldsarerocks，andthehedgesarestones——passingbythestonegardensoftheFlorian，andwonderingatthenumberandhandsomenessofthestonevillagesandchurchesrisingeverywhereamongthestonyhills。Handsomevillaswerepassedeverywhere，andwedroveforalongdistancealongthesidesofanaqueduct，quiteaRoyalworkoftheCaravaggioingoldarmour，theGrandMasterDeVignacourt。AmostagreeablecontrasttothearidrocksofthegeneralscenerywasthegardenattheGovernor’scountry-house；
withtheorange-treesandwater，itsbeautifulgoldengrapes，luxuriantflowers，andthickcoolshrubberies。Theeyelongsforthissortofrefreshment，afterbeingsearedwiththehotglareofthegeneralcountry；andSt。AntoniowasaspleasantafterMaltaasMaltawasafterthesea。
WepaidtheislandasubsequentvisitinNovember，passingseventeendaysatanestablishmentcalledFortManuelthere，andbypunsterstheManueldesVoyageurs；whereGovernmentaccommodatesyouwithquarters；wheretheauthoritiesaresoattentiveastoscentyourletterswitharomaticvinegarbeforeyoureceivethem，andsocarefulofyourhealthastolockyouupinyourroomeverynightlestyoushouldwalkinyoursleep，andsooverthebattlementsintothesea——ifyouescapeddrowninginthesea，thesentriesontheoppositeshorewouldfireatyou，hencethenatureoftheprecaution。Todrop，however，thissatiricalstrain：thosewhoknowwhatquarantineis，mayfancythattheplacesomehowbecomesunbearableinwhichithasbeenendured。AndthoughtheNovemberclimateofMaltaislikethemostdeliciousMayinEngland，andthoughthereiseverygaietyandamusementinthetown，acomfortablelittleopera，agoodoldlibraryfilledfullofgoodoldbooks（noneofyourworksofmodernscience，travel，andhistory，butgoodoldUSELESSbooksofthelasttwocenturies），andnobodytotroubleyouinreadingthem，andthoughthesocietyofValettaismosthospitable，varied，andagreeable，yetsomehowonedidnotfeelSAFEintheisland，withperpetualglimpsesofFortManuelfromtheoppositeshore；and，lestthequarantineauthoritiesshouldhaveafancytofetchonebackagain，onapretextofposthumousplague，wemadeourwaytoNaplesbytheveryfirstopportunity——thosewhoremained，thatis，ofthelittleEasternExpedition。Theywerenotallthere。TheGiveroflifeanddeathhadremovedtwoofourcompany：onewasleftbehindtodieinEgypt，withamothertobewailhisloss，anotherweburiedinthedismallazarettocemetery。
***
Oneisboundtolookatthis，too，asapartofourjourney。
Diseaseanddeathareknockingperhapsatyournextcabindoor。
Yourkindandcheerycompanionhasriddenhislastrideandemptiedhislastglassbesideyou。Andwhilefondheartsareyearningforhimfaraway，andhisownmind，ifconscious，isturningeagerlytowardsthespotoftheworldwhitheraffectionorinterestcallsit——theGreatFathersummonstheanxiousspiritfromearthtohimself，andordainsthatthenearestanddearestshallmeetherenomore。
Suchanoccurrenceasadeathinalazaretto，mereselfishnessrendersstriking。Wewerewalkingwithhimbuttwodaysagoondeck。Onehasasketchofhim，anotherhiscard，withtheaddresswrittenyesterday，andgivenwithaninvitationtocomeandseehimathomeinthecountry，wherehischildrenarelookingforhim。Heisdeadinaday，andburiedinthewallsoftheprison。Adoctorfelthispulsebydeputy——aclergymancomesfromthetowntoreadthelastserviceoverhim——andthefriends，whoattendhisfuneral，aremarshalledbylazaretto-guardians，soasnottotoucheachother。Everymangoesbacktohisroomandappliesthelessontohimself。Onewouldnotsodepartwithoutseeingagainthedeardearfaces。Wereckonupthosewelove：theyarebutveryfew，butIthinkonelovesthembetterthanevernow。Shoulditbeyourturnnext？——andwhynot？Isitpityorcomforttothinkofthataffectionwhichwatchesandsurvivesyou？
TheMakerhaslinkedtogetherthewholeraceofmanwiththischainoflove。Iliketothinkthatthereisnomanbuthashadkindlyfeelingsforsomeother，andheforhisneighbour，untilwebindtogetherthewholefamilyofAdam。Nordoesitendhere。Itjoinsheavenandearthtogether。Formyfriendormychildofpastdaysisstillmyfriendormychildtomehere，orinthehomepreparedforusbytheFatherofall。Ifidentitysurvivesthegrave，asourfaithtellsus，isitnotaconsolationtothinkthattheremaybeoneortwosoulsamongthepurifiedandjust，whoseaffectionwatchesusinvisible，andfollowsthepoorsinneronearth？
CHAPTERV：ATHENS
NotfeelinganyenthusiasmmyselfaboutAthens，myboundendutyofcourseisclear，tosneerandlaughheartilyatallwhohave。Infact，whatbusinesshasalawyer，whowasinPumpCourtthisdaythreeweeks，andwhosecommonreadingislawreportsorthenewspaper，topretendtofallinloveforthelongvacationwithmerepoetry，ofwhichIswearagreatdealisverydoubtful，andtogetupanenthusiasmquiteforeigntohisnatureandusualcallinginlife？WhatcallhaveladiestoconsiderGreece\"romantic，\"theywhogettheirnotionsofmythologyfromthewell-knownpagesof\"Tooke’sPantheon\"？WhatisthereasonthatblunderingYorkshiresquires，youngdandiesfromCorfuregiments，jollysailorsfromshipsintheharbour，andyellowoldIndiansreturningfromBundelcund，shouldthinkpropertobeenthusiasticaboutacountryofwhichtheyknownothing；themerephysicalbeautyofwhichtheycannot，forthemostpart，comprehend；andbecausecertaincharacterslivedinittwothousandfourhundredyearsago？WhathavethesepeopleincommonwithPericles，whathavetheseladiesincommonwithAspasia（Ofie）？OftheraceofEnglishmenwhocomewanderingaboutthetombofSocrates，doyouthinkthemajoritywouldnothavevotedtohemlockhim？Yes：fortheverysamesuperstitionwhichleadsmenbythenosenow，drovethemonwardinthedayswhenthelowlyhusbandofXantippediedfordaringtothinksimplyandtospeakthetruth。Iknowofnoqualitymoremagnificentinfoolsthantheirfaith：thatperfectconsciousnesstheyhave，thattheyaredoingvirtuousandmeritoriousactions，whentheyareperformingactsoffolly，murderingSocrates，orpeltingAristideswithholyoyster-shells——allforVirtue’ssake；
anda\"HistoryofDulnessinallAgesoftheWorld，\"isabookwhichaphilosopherwouldsurelybehanged，butascertainlyblessed，forwriting。
Ifpapaandmamma（honourbetothem！）hadnotfollowedthefaithoftheirfathers，andthoughtpropertosendawaytheironlybelovedson（afterwardstobecelebratedunderthenameofTitmarsh）intotenyears’banishmentofinfernalmisery，tyranny，annoyance；togiveoverthefreshfeelingsoftheheartofthelittleMichaelAngelotothedisciplineofvulgarbullies，who，inordertoleadtenderyoungchildrentotheTempleofLearning（astheydointhespelling-books），drivethemonwithclenchedfistsandlowabuse；iftheyfainted，revivethemwithathump，orassailedthemwithacurse；iftheyweremiserable，consoledthemwithabrutaljeer——if，Isay，mydearparents，insteadofgivingmetheinestimablebenefitofatenyears’classicaleducation，hadkeptmeathomewithmydearthirteensisters，itisprobableI
shouldhavelikedthiscountryofAttica，insightoftheblueshoresofwhichthepresentpatheticletteriswritten；butIwasmadesomiserableinyouthbyaclassicaleducation，thatallconnectedwithitisdisagreeableinmyeyes；andIhavethesamerecollectionofGreekinyouththatIhaveofcastor-oil。
SoincominginsightofthepromontoryofSunium，wheretheGreekMuse，inanawfulvision，cametome，andsaidinapatronisingway，\"Why，mydear\"（shealways，theoldspinster，adoptsthishighandmightytone）——\"Why，mydear，areyounotcharmedtobeinthisfamousneighbourhood，inthislandofpoetsandheroes，ofwhosehistoryyourclassicaleducationoughttohavemadeyouamaster？
ifitdidnot，youhavewofullyneglectedyouropportunities，andyourdearparentshavewastedtheirmoneyinsendingyoutoschool。\"Ireplied，\"Madam，yourcompanyinyouthwasmadesolaboriouslydisagreeabletome，thatIcan’tatpresentreconcilemyselftoyouinage。Ireadyourpoets，butitwasinfearandtrembling；andacoldsweatisbutanillaccompanimenttopoetry。
Iblunderedthroughyourhistories；buthistoryissodull（savingyourpresence）ofherself，thatwhenthebrutaldulnessofaschoolmasterissuperaddedtoherownslowconversation，theunionbecomesintolerable：henceIhavenottheslightestpleasureinrenewingmyacquaintancewithaladywhohasbeenthesourceofsomuchbodilyandmentaldiscomforttome。\"Tomakealongstoryshort，Iamanxioustoapologiseforawantofenthusiasmintheclassicalline，andtoexcuseanignorancewhichisofthemostundeniablesort。
ThisisanimproperframeofmindforapersonvisitingthelandofAEschylusandEuripides；addtowhich，wehavebeenabominablyoverchargedattheinn：andwhatarethebluehillsofAttica，thesilvercalmbasinofPiraeus，theheatheryheightsofPentelicus，andyonderrockscrownedbytheDoriccolumnsoftheParthenon，andthethinIonicshaftsoftheErechtheum，toamanwhohashadlittlerest，andisbittenalloverbybugs？WasAlcibiadesbittenbybugs，Iwonder；anddidthebrutescrawloverhimashelayintherosyarmsofPhryne？IwishedallnightforSocrates’shammockorbasket，asitisdescribedinthe\"Clouds；\"inwhichresting-
place，nodoubt，theabominableanimalskeptperforceclearofhim。
AFrenchman-of-war，lyinginthesilverylittleharbour，sternlyeyeingoutofitssternportholesasaucylittleEnglishcorvettebeside，beganplayingsoundingmarchesasacrowdofboatscamepaddlinguptothesteamer’ssidetoconveyustravellerstoshore。
TherewereRussianschoonersandGreekbrigslyinginthislittlebay；dumpylittlewindmillswhirlingroundonthesunburntheightsroundaboutit；animprovisedtownofquaysandmarinetavernshassprungupontheshore；ahostofjinglingbarouches，moremiserablethananytobeseeneveninGermany，werecollectedatthelanding-place；andtheGreekdrivers（howqueertheylookedinskull-caps，shabbyjacketswithprofuseembroideryofworsted，andendlesspetticoatsofdirtycalico！）began，inagenerousardourforsecuringpassengers，toabuseeachother’shorsesandcarriagesintheregularLondonfashion。SatirecouldcertainlyhardlycaricaturethevehicleinwhichweweremadetojourneytoAthens；
anditwasonlybythinkingthat，badastheywere，thesecoachesweremuchmorecomfortablecontrivancesthananyAlcibiadesorCimoneverhad，thatweconsoledourselvesalongtheroad。Itwasflatforsixmilesalongtheplaintothecity：andyouseeforthegreaterpartofthewaythepurplemountonwhichtheAcropolisrises，andthegleaminghousesofthetownspreadbeneath。Roundthiswide，yellow，barrenplain，——astunteddistrictofolive-treesisalmosttheonlyvegetationvisible——thererises，asitwere，asortofchorusofthemostbeautifulmountains；themostelegant，gracious，andnobletheeyeeverlookedon。Thesehillsdidnotappearatallloftyorterrible，butsuperblyrichandaristocratic。Thecloudsweredancingroundaboutthem；youcouldseetheirrosypurpleshadowssweepingroundtheclearserenesummitsofthehill。Tocallahillaristocraticseemsaffectedorabsurd；butthedifferencebetweenthesehillsandtheothers，isthedifferencebetweenNewgatePrisonandtheTravellers’Club，forinstance：botharebuildings；buttheonestern，dark，andcoarse；
theotherrich，elegant，andfestive。Atleast，soIthought。
WithsuchastatelypalaceasmunificentNaturehadbuiltforthesepeople，whatcouldtheybethemselvesbutlordly，beautiful，brilliant，brave，andwise？WesawfourGreeksondonkeysontheroad（whichisadust-whirlwindwhereitisnotapuddle）；andotherfourwereplayingwithadirtypackofcards，atabarrackthatEnglishpoetshavechristenedthe\"Half-wayHouse。\"Doesexternalnatureandbeautyinfluencethesoultogood？YougoaboutWarwickshire，andfancythatfrommerelybeingbornandwanderinginthosesweetsunnyplainsandfreshwoodlandsShakspearemusthavedrunkinaportionofthatfrankartlesssenseofbeautywhichliesabouthisworkslikeabloomordew；butaCoventryribbon-maker，oraslangLeamingtonsquire，arelookingonthoseverysamelandscapestoo，andwhatdotheyprofit？YoutheoriseabouttheinfluencewhichtheclimateandappearanceofAtticamusthavehadinennoblingthosewhowerebornthere：
yonderdirty，swindling，raggedblackguards，lollingovergreasycardsthreehoursbeforenoon，quarrellingandshrieking，armedtotheteethandafraidtofight，arebredoutofthesamelandwhichbegotthephilosophersandheroes。Butthe\"Half-wayHouse\"ispassedbythistime，andbehold！weareinthecapitalofKingOtho。
IswearsolemnlythatIwouldratherhavetwohundredayearinFleetStreet，thanbeKingoftheGreeks，withBasileuswrittenbeforemynameroundtheirbeggarlycoin；withthebotherofperpetualrevolutionsinmyhugeplaster-of-Parispalace，withnoamusementbutadriveintheafternoonoverawretchedaridcountry，whereroadsarenotmade，withambassadors（thedeuceknowswhy，forwhatgoodcantheEnglish，ortheFrench，ortheRussianpartygetoutofsuchabankruptallianceasthis？）
perpetuallypullingandtuggingatme，awayfromhonestGermany，wherethereisbeerandaestheticconversation，andoperasatasmallcost。TheshabbinessofthisplaceactuallybeatsIreland，andthatisastrongword。ThepalaceoftheBasileusisanenormousedificeofplaster，inasquarecontainingsixhouses，threedonkeys，noroads，nofountains（exceptinthepictureoftheinn）；backwardsitseemstolookstraighttothemountain——ononesideisabeggarlygarden——theKinggoesouttodrive（revolutionspermitting）atfive——somefour-and-twentyblackguardssaunteruptothehugesandhillofaterrace，asHisMajestypassesbyinagiltbaroucheandanabsurdfancydress；thegiltbarouchegoesplungingdownthesandhills；thetwodozensoldiers，whohavebeenpresentingarms，slouchofftotheirquarters；thevastbarrackofapalaceremainsentirelywhite，ghastly，andlonely；and，savethebrayingofadonkeynowandthen（whichlong-earedminstrelsaremoreactiveandsonorousinAthensthaninanyplaceIknow），allisentirelysilentroundBasileus’spalace。HowcouldpeoplewhoknewLeopoldfancyhewouldbeso\"jollygreen\"astotakesuchaberth？ItwasonlyagobemoucheofaBavarianthatcouldeverhavebeeninducedtoacceptit。
IbeseechyoutobelievethatitwasnotthebillandthebugsattheinnwhichinducedthewriterhereoftospeaksoslightinglyoftheresidenceofBasileus。Theseevilsarenowcuredandforgotten。ThisiswrittenofftheleadenflatsandmoundswhichtheycalltheTroad。Itissternjusticealonewhichpronouncesthisexcruciatingsentence。Itwasafarcetomakethisplaceintoakinglycapital；andImakenomannerofdoubtthatKingOtho，theverydayhecangetawayunperceived，andgettogetherthepassage-
money，willbeofffordearoldDeutschland，Fatherland，Beerland！
IhaveneverseenatowninEnglandwhichmaybecomparedtothis；
forthoughHerneBayisaruinnow，moneywasoncespentuponitandhousesbuilt；here，beyondafewscoreofmansionscomfortablylaidout，thetownislittlebetterthanaricketyagglomerationoflargerandsmallerhuts，trickedouthereandtherewiththemostabsurdcrackedornamentsandcheapattemptsatelegance。Butneatnessistheeleganceofpoverty，andthesepeopledespisesuchahomelyornament。Ihavegotamapwithsquares，fountains，theatres，publicgardens，andPlacesd’Othonmarkedout；buttheyonlyexistinthepapercapital——thewretchedtumble-downwoodenoneboastsofnone。
OneisobligedtocomebacktotheolddisagreeablecomparisonofIreland。AthensmaybeaboutaswealthyaplaceasCarloworKillarney——thestreetsswarmwithidlecrowds，theinnumerablelittlelanesflowoverwithdirtylittlechildren，theyareplayingandpuddlingaboutinthedirteverywhere，withgreatbigeyes，yellowfaces，andthequeerestlittlegownsandskull-caps。Butintheouterman，theGreekhasfartheadvantageoftheIrishman：
mostofthemarewellanddecentlydressed（iffive-and-twentyyardsofpetticoatmaynotbecalleddecent，whatmay？），theyswaggertoandfrowithhugeknivesintheirgirdles。Almostallthemenarehandsome，butlivehard，itissaid，inordertodecoratetheirbackswiththosefineclothesoftheirs。Ihaveseenbuttwoorthreehandsomewomen，andthesehadthegreatdrawbackwhichiscommontotherace——Imean，asallow，greasy，coarsecomplexion，atwhichitwasnotadvisabletolooktooclosely。
AndonthisscoreIthinkweEnglishmayprideourselvesonpossessinganadvantage（byWE，Imeanthelovelyladiestowhomthisisaddressedwiththemostrespectfulcompliments）overthemostclassicalcountryintheworld。Idon’tcareforbeautywhichwillonlybeartobelookedatfromadistance，likeasceneinatheatre。Whatisthemostbeautifulnoseintheworld，ifitbecoveredwithaskinofthetextureandcolourofcoarsewhitey-
brownpaper；andifNaturehasmadeitasslipperyandshiningasthoughithadbeenanointedwithpomatum？Theymaytalkaboutbeauty，butwouldyouwearaflowerthathadbeendippedinagrease-pot？No；givemeafresh，dewy，healthyroseoutofSomersetshire；notoneofthosesuperb，tawdry，unwholesomeexotics，whichareonlygoodtomakepoemsabout。LordByronwrotemorecantofthissortthananypoetIknowof。Thinkof\"thepeasantgirlswithdarkblueeyes\"oftheRhine——thebrown-faced，flat-nosed，thick-lipped，dirtywenches！Thinkof\"fillinghighacupofSamianwine；\"smallbeerisnectarcomparedtoit，andByronhimselfalwaysdrankgin。Thatmanneverwrotefromhisheart。Hegotupraptureandenthusiasmwithaneyetothepublic；butthisisdangerousground，evenmoredangerousthantolookAthensfullintheface，andsaythatyoureyesarenotdazzledbyitsbeauty。