第6章
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  Chapter17

  NextdayMargueritesentmeawayveryearly,sayingthatthedukewascomingatanearlyhour,andpromisingtowritetomethemomenthewent,andtomakeanappointmentfortheevening。InthecourseofthedayIreceivedthisnote:

  \"IamgoingtoBougivalwiththeduke;beatPrudence\'sto-nightateight。\"

  AttheappointedhourMargueritecametomeatMme。Duvernoy\'s。

  \"Well,itisallsettled,\"shesaid,assheentered。\"Thehouseistaken?\"askedPrudence。\"Yes;heagreedatonce。\"

  Ididnotknowtheduke,butIfeltashamedofdeceivinghim。

  \"Butthatisnotall,\"continuedMarguerite。

  \"Whatelseisthere?\"

  \"IhavebeenseeingaboutaplaceforArmandtostay。\"

  \"Inthesamehouse?\"askedPrudence,laughing。

  \"No,atPointduJour,wherewehaddinner,thedukeandI。Whilehewasadmiringtheview,IaskedMme。Arnould(sheiscalledMme。Arnould,isn\'tshe?)iftherewereanysuitablerooms,andsheshowedmejusttheverything:salon,anteroom,andbed-room,atsixtyfrancsamonth;thewholeplacefurnishedinawaytodivertahypochondriac。Itookit。WasIright?\"Iflungmyarmsaroundherneckandkissedher。

  \"Itwillbecharming,\"shecontinued。\"Youhavethekeyofthelittledoor,andIhavepromisedthedukethekeyofthefrontdoor,whichhewillnottake,becausehewillcomeduringthedaywhenhecomes。Ithink,betweenourselves,thatheisenchantedwithacapricewhichwillkeepmeoutofParisforatime,andsosilencetheobjectionsofhisfamily。However,hehasaskedmehowI,lovingParisasIdo,couldmakeupmymindtoburymyselfinthecountry。ItoldhimthatIwasill,andthatIwantedrest。Heseemedtohavesomedifficultyinbelievingme。Thepooroldmanisalwaysonthewatch。Wemusttakeeveryprecaution,mydearArmand,forhewillhavemewatchedwhileIamthere;anditisn\'tonlythequestionofhistakingahouseforme,buthehasmydebtstopay,andunluckilyIhaveplenty。Doesallthatsuityou?\"

  \"Yes,\"Ianswered,tryingtoquietthescrupleswhichthiswayoflivingawokeinmefromtimetotime。

  \"Wewentalloverthehouse,andweshallhaveeverythingperfect。Thedukeisgoingtolookaftereverysinglething。Ah,mydear,\"sheadded,kissingme,\"you\'reinluck;it\'samillionairewhomakesyourbedforyou。\"

  \"Andwhenshallyoumoveintothehouse?\"inquiredPrudence。

  \"Assoonaspossible。\"

  \"Willyoutakeyourhorsesandcarriage?\"

  \"Ishalltakethewholehouse,andyoucanlookaftermyplacewhileIamaway。\"

  AweeklaterMargueritewassettledinhercountryhouse,andI

  wasinstalledatPointduJour。

  ThenbegananexistencewhichIshallhavesomedifficultyindescribingtoyou。AtfirstMargueritecouldnotbreakentirelywithherformerhabits,and,asthehousewasalwaysenfete,allthewomenwhomsheknewcametoseeher。ForawholemonththerewasnotadaywhenMargueritehadnoteightortenpeopletomeals。Prudence,onherside,broughtdownallthepeoplesheknew,anddidthehonoursofthehouseasifthehousebelongedtoher。

  Theduke\'smoneypaidforallthat,asyoumayimagine;butfromtimetotimePrudencecametome,askingforanoteforathousandfrancs,professedlyonbehalfofMarguerite。YouknowI

  hadwonsomemoneyatgambling;IthereforeimmediatelyhandedovertoPrudencewhatsheaskedforMarguerite,andfearinglestsheshouldrequiremorethanIpossessed,IborrowedatParisasumequaltothatwhichIhadalreadyborrowedandpaidback。I

  wasthenoncemoreinpossessionofsometenthousandfrancs,withoutreckoningmyallowance。However,Marguerite\'spleasureinseeingherfriendswasalittlemoderatedwhenshesawtheexpensewhichthatpleasureentailed,andespeciallythenecessityshewassometimesinofaskingmeformoney。Theduke,whohadtakenthehouseinorderthatMargueritemightrestthere,nolongervisitedit,fearingtofindhimselfinthemidstofalargeandmerrycompany,bywhomhedidnotwishtobeseen。

  Thiscameaboutthroughhishavingoncearrivedtodinetete-a-tetewithMarguerite,andhavingfallenuponapartyoffifteen,whowerestillatlunchatanhourwhenhewaspreparedtositdowntodinner。Hehadunsuspectinglyopenedthedining-roomdoor,andhadbeengreetedbyaburstoflaughter,andhadhadtoretireprecipitatelybeforetheimpertinentmirthofthewomenwhowereassembledthere。

  Margueriterosefromtable,andjoinedthedukeinthenextroom,whereshetried,asfaraspossible,toinducehimtoforgettheincident,buttheoldman,woundedinhisdignity,boreheragrudgeforit,andcouldnotforgiveher。Hesaidtoher,somewhatcruelly,thathewastiredofpayingforthefolliesofawomanwhocouldnotevenhavehimtreatedwithrespectunderhisownroof,andhewentawayingreatindignation。

  Sincethatdayhehadneverbeenheardof。

  InvainMargueritedismissedherguests,changedherwayoflife;

  thedukewasnottobeheardof。Iwasthegainerinso,farthatmymistressnowbelongedtomemorecompletely,andmydreamwasatlengthrealized。Margueritecouldnotbewithoutme。Notcaringwhattheresultmightbe,shepubliclyproclaimedourliaison,andIhadcometoliveentirelyatherhouse。Theservantsaddressedmeofficiallyastheirmaster。

  PrudencehadstrictlysermonizedMargueriteinregardtohernewmanneroflife;butshehadrepliedthatshelovedme,thatshecouldnotlivewithoutme,andthat,happenwhatmight,shewouldnotsacrificethepleasureofhavingmeconstantlywithher,addingthatthosewhowerenotsatisfiedwiththisarrangementwerefreetostayaway。SomuchIhadheardonedaywhenPrudencehadsaidtoMargueritethatshehadsomethingveryimportanttotellher,andIhadlistenedatthedooroftheroomintowhichtheyhadshutthemselves。

  Notlongafter,Prudencereturnedagain。Iwasattheotherendofthegardenwhenshearrived,andshedidnotseeme。Ihadnodoubt,fromthewayinwhichMargueritecametomeether,thatanothersimilarconversationwasgoingtotakeplace,andIwasanxioustohearwhatitwasabout。Thetwowomenshutthemselvesintoaboudoir,andIputmyselfwithinhearing。

  \"Well?\"saidMarguerite。

  \"Well,Ihaveseentheduke。\"

  \"Whatdidhesay?\"

  \"Thathewouldgladlyforgiveyouinregardtothescenewhichtookplace,butthathehaslearnedthatyouarepubliclylivingwithM。ArmandDuval,andthathewillneverforgivethat。\'LetMargueriteleavetheyoungman,\'hesaidtome,\'and,asinthepast,Iwillgiveherallthatsherequires;ifnot,letherasknothingmorefromme。\'\"

  \"Andyoureplied?\"

  \"ThatIwouldreporthisdecisiontoyou,andIpromisedhimthatIwouldbringyouintoamorereasonableframeofmind。Onlythink,mydearchild,ofthepositionthatyouarelosing,andthatArmandcannevergiveyou。Helovesyouwithallhissoul,buthehasnofortunecapableofsupplyingyourneeds,andhewillbeboundtoleaveyouoneday,whenitwillbetoolateandwhenthedukewillrefusetodoanymoreforyou。WouldyoulikemetospeaktoArmand?\"

  Margueriteseemedtobethinking,forsheanswerednothing。MyheartbeatviolentlywhileIwaitedforherreply。

  \"No,\"sheanswered,\"IwillnotleaveArmand,andIwillnotconcealthefactthatIamlivingwithhim。Itisfollynodoubt,butIlovehim。Whatwouldyouhavemedo?Andthen,nowthathehasgotaccustomedtobealwayswithme,hewouldsuffertoocruellyifhehadtoleavemesomuchasanhouraday。Besides,IhavenotsuchalongtimetolivethatIneedmakemyselfmiserableinordertopleaseanoldmanwhoseverysightmakesmefeelold。Lethimkeephismoney;Iwilldowithoutit。\"

  \"Butwhatwillyoudo?\"

  \"Idon\'tintheleastknow。\"

  Prudencewasnodoubtgoingtomakesomereply,butIenteredsuddenlyandflungmyselfatMarguerite\'sfeet,coveringherhandswithtearsinmyjoyatbeingthusloved。

  \"Mylifeisyours,Marguerite;youneedthismannolonger。AmI

  nothere?ShallIeverleaveyou,andcanIeverrepayyouforthehappinessthatyougiveme?Nomorebarriers,myMarguerite;

  welove;whatmattersalltherest?\"

  \"Ohyes,Iloveyou,myArmand,\"shemurmured,puttinghertwoarmsaroundmyneck。\"IloveyouasIneverthoughtIshouldeverlove。Wewillbehappy;wewilllivequietly,andIwillsaygood-byeforevertothelifeforwhichInowblush。Youwon\'teverreproachmeforthepast?Tellme!\"

  Tearschokedmyvoice。IcouldonlyreplybyclaspingMargueritetomyheart。

  \"Well,\"saidshe,turningtoPrudence,andspeakinginabrokenvoice,\"youcanreportthisscenetotheduke,andyoucanaddthatwehavenolongerneedofhim。\"

  Fromthatdayforththedukewasneverreferredto。MargueritewasnolongerthesamewomanthatIhadknown。SheavoidedeverythingthatmightrecalltomethelifewhichshehadbeenleadingwhenIfirstmether。Neverdidwifeorsistersurroundhusbandorbrotherwithsuchlovingcareasshehadforme。Hernaturewasmorbidlyopentoallimpressionsandaccessibletoallsentiments。Shehadbrokenequallywithherfriendsandwithherways,withherwordsandwithherextravagances。AnyonewhohadseenusleavingthehousetogoontheriverinthecharminglittleboatwhichIhadboughtwouldneverhavebelievedthatthewomandressedinwhite,wearingastrawhat,andcarryingonherarmalittlesilkpelissetoprotectheragainstthedampoftheriver,wasthatMargueriteGautierwho,onlyfourmonthsago,hadbeenthetalkofthetownfortheluxuryandscandalofherexistence。

  Alas,wemadehastetobehappy,asifweknewthatwewerenottobehappylong。

  FortwomonthswehadnotevenbeentoParis。Noonecametoseeus,exceptPrudenceandJulieDuprat,ofwhomIhavespokentoyou,andtowhomMargueritewasafterwardtogivethetouchingnarrativethatIhavethere。

  Ipassedwholedaysatthefeetofmymistress。Weopenedthewindowsuponthegarden,and,aswewatchedthesummerripeninginitsflowersandundertheshadowofthetrees,webreathedtogetherthattruelifewhichneitherMargueritenorIhadeverknownbefore。

  Herdelightinthesmallestthingswaslikethatofachild。

  Thereweredayswhensheraninthegarden,likeachildoften,afterabutterflyoradragon-fly。Thiscourtesanwhohadcostmoremoneyinbouquetsthanwouldhavekeptawholefamilyincomfort,wouldsometimessitonthegrassforanhour,examiningthesimpleflowerwhosenameshebore。

  ItwasatthistimethatshereadManonLescaut,overandoveragain。Ifoundherseveraltimesmakingnotesinthebook,andshealwaysdeclaredthatwhenawomanloves,shecannotdoasManondid。

  Thedukewrotetohertwoorthreetimes。Sherecognisedthewritingandgavemetheletterswithoutreadingthem。Sometimesthetermsoftheselettersbroughttearstomyeyes。HehadimaginedthatbyclosinghispursetoMarguerite,hewouldbringherbacktohim;butwhenhehadperceivedtheuselessnessofthesemeans,hecouldholdoutnolonger;hewroteandaskedthathemightseeheragain,asbefore,nomatteronwhatconditions。

  Ireadtheseurgentandrepeatedletters,andtoretheminpieces,withouttellingMargueritewhattheycontainedandwithoutadvisinghertoseetheoldmanagain,thoughIwashalfinclinedto,somuchdidIpityhim,butIwasafraidlest,ifI

  soadvisedhersheshouldthinkthatIwishedtheduke,notmerelytocomeandseeheragain,buttotakeovertheexpensesofthehouse;Ifeared,aboveall,thatshemightthinkmecapableofshirkingtheresponsibilitiesofeveryconsequencetowhichherloveformemightleadher。

  Itthuscameaboutthattheduke,receivingnoreply,ceasedtowrite,andthatMargueriteandIcontinuedtolivetogetherwithoutgivingathoughttothefuture。

  Chapter18

  Itwouldbedifficulttogiveyouallthedetailsofournewlife。Itwasmadeupofaseriesoflittlechildishevents,charmingforusbutinsignificanttoanyoneelse。Youknowwhatitistobeinlovewithawoman,youknowhowitcutsshortthedays,andwithwhatlovinglistlessnessonedriftsintothemorrow。Youknowthatforgetfulnessofeverythingwhichcomesofaviolentconfident,reciprocatedlove。Everybeingwhoisnotthebelovedoneseemsauselessbeingincreation。Oneregretshavingcastscrapsofone\'shearttootherwomen,andonecannotbelieveinthepossibilityofeverpressinganotherhandthanthatwhichoneholdsbetweenone\'shands。Themindadmitsneitherworknorremembrance;nothing,inshort,whichcandistractitfromtheonethoughtinwhichitisceaselesslyabsorbed。Everydayonediscoversinone\'smistressanewcharmandunknowndelights。Existenceitselfisbuttheunceasingaccomplishmentofanunchangingdesire;thesoulisbutthevestalchargedtofeedthesacredfireoflove。

  Weoftenwentatnight-timetositinthelittlewoodabovethehouse;therewelistenedtothecheerfulharmoniesofevening,bothofusthinkingofthecominghourswhichshouldleaveustooneanothertillthedawnofday。Atothertimeswedidnotgetupallday;wedidnotevenletthesunlightenterourroom。

  Thecurtainswerehermeticallyclosed,andforamomenttheexternalworlddidnotexistforus。Naninealonehadtherighttoopenourdoor,butonlytobringinourmealsandeventhesewetookwithoutgettingup,interruptingthemwithlaughterandgaiety。Tothatsucceededabriefsleep,for,disappearingintothedepthsofourlove,wewereliketwodiverswhoonlycometothesurfacetotakebreath。

  Nevertheless,Isurprisedmomentsofsadness,eventears,inMarguerite;Iaskedherthecauseofhertrouble,andsheanswered:

  \"Ourloveisnotlikeotherloves,myArmand。YoulovemeasifI

  hadneverbelongedtoanother,andItremblelestlateron,repentingofyourlove,andaccusingmeofmypast,youshouldletmefallbackintothatlifefromwhichyouhavetakenme。I

  thinkthatnowthatIhavetastedofanotherlife,IshoulddieifIwentbacktotheoldone。Tellmethatyouwillneverleaveme!\"

  \"Iswearit!\"

  Atthesewordsshelookedatmeasiftoreadinmyeyeswhethermyoathwassincere;thenflungherselfintomyarms,and,hidingherheadinmybosom,saidtome:\"Youdon\'tknowhowmuchIloveyou!\"

  Oneevening,seatedonthebalconyoutsidethewindow,welookedatthemoonwhichseemedtorisewithdifficultyoutofitsbedofclouds,andwelistenedtothewindviolentlyrustlingthetrees;weheldeachother\'shands,andforawholequarterofanhourwehadnotspoken,whenMargueritesaidtome:

  \"Winterisathand。Wouldyoulikeforustogoabroad?\"

  \"Where?\"

  \"ToItaly。\"

  \"Youaretiredofhere?\"

  \"Iamafraidofthewinter;IamparticularlyafraidofyourreturntoParis。\"

  \"Why?\"

  \"Formanyreasons。\"

  Andshewentonabruptly,withoutgivingmeherreasonsforfears:

  \"Willyougoabroad?IwillsellallthatIhave;wewillgoandlivethere,andtherewillbenothingleftofwhatIwas;noonewillknowwhoIam。Willyou?\"

  \"Byallmeans,ifyoulike,Marguerite,letustravel,\"Isaid。

  \"Butwhereisthenecessityofsellingthingswhichyouwillbegladofwhenwereturn?Ihavenotalargeenoughfortunetoacceptsuchasacrifice;butIhaveenoughforustobeabletotravelsplendidlyforfiveorsixmonths,ifthatwillamuseyoutheleastintheworld。\"

  \"Afterall,no,\"shesaid,leavingthewindowandgoingtositdownonthesofaattheotherendoftheroom。\"Whyshouldwespendmoneyabroad?Icostyouenoughalready,here。\"

  \"Youreproachme,Marguerite;itisn\'tgenerous。\"

  \"Forgiveme,myfriend,\"shesaid,givingmeherhand。\"Thisthunderweathergetsonmynerves;IdonotsaywhatIintendtosay。\"

  Andafterembracingmeshefellintoalongreverie。

  Scenesofthiskindoftentookplace,andthoughIcouldnotdiscovertheircause,IcouldnotfailtoseeinMargueritesignsofdisquietudeinregardtothefuture。Shecouldnotdoubtmylove,whichincreaseddaybyday,andyetIoftenfoundhersad,withoutbeingabletogetanyexplanationofthereason,exceptsomephysicalcause。Fearingthatsomonotonousalifewasbeginningtowearyher,IproposedreturningtoParis;butshealwaysrefused,assuringmethatshecouldnotbesohappyanywhereasinthecountry。

  Prudencenowcamebutrarely;butsheoftenwroteletterswhichI

  neveraskedtosee,though,everytimetheycame,theyseemedtopreoccupyMargueritedeeply。Ididnotknowwhattothink。

  OnedayMargueritewasinherroom。Ientered。Shewaswriting。

  \"Towhomareyouwriting?\"Iasked。\"ToPrudence。DoyouwanttoseewhatIamwriting?\"

  Ihadahorrorofanythingthatmightlooklikesuspicion,andI

  answeredthatIhadnodesiretoknowwhatshewaswriting;andyetIwascertainthatletterwouldhaveexplainedtomethecauseofhersadness。

  Nextdaytheweatherwassplendid。\'MargueriteproposedtometotaketheboatandgoasfarastheislandofCroissy。Sheseemedverycheerful;whenwegotbackitwasfiveo\'clock。

  \"Mme。Duvernoyhasbeenhere,\"saidNanine,asshesawusenter。

  \"Shehasgoneagain?\"askedMarguerite。

  \"Yes,madame,inthecarriage;shesaiditwasarranged。\"

  \"Quiteright,\"saidMargueritesharply。\"Servethedinner。\"

  TwodaysafterwardtherecamealetterfromPrudence,andforafortnightMargueriteseemedtohavegotridofhermysteriousgloom,forwhichsheconstantlyaskedmyforgiveness,nowthatitnolongerexisted。Still,thecarriagedidnotreturn。

  \"HowisitthatPrudencedoesnotsendyoubackyourcarriage?\"I

  askedoneday。

  \"Oneofthehorsesisill,andtherearesomerepairstobedone。

  Itisbettertohavethatdonewhilewearehere,anddon\'tneedacarriage,thantowaittillwegetbacktoParis。\"

  Prudencecametwodaysafterward,andconfirmedwhatMargueritehadsaid。Thetwowomenwentforawalkinthegarden,andwhenI

  joinedthemtheychangedtheconversation。Thatnight,asshewasgoing,PrudencecomplainedofthecoldandaskedMargueritetolendherashawl。

  Soamonthpassed,andallthetimeMargueritewasmorejoyousandmoreaffectionatethansheeverhadbeen。Nevertheless,thecarriagedidnotreturn,theshawlhadnotbeensentback,andI

  begantobeanxiousinspiteofmyself,andasIknewinwhichdrawerMargueriteputPrudence\'sletters,Itookadvantageofamomentwhenshewasattheotherendofthegarden,wenttothedrawer,andtriedtoopenit;invain,foritwaslocked。WhenI

  openedthedrawerinwhichthetrinketsanddiamondswereusuallykept,theseopenedwithoutresistance,butthejewelcaseshaddisappeared,alongwiththeircontentsnodoubt。

  Asharpfearpenetratedmyheart。ImightindeedaskMargueriteforthetruthinregardtothesedisappearances,butitwascertainthatshewouldnotconfessit。

  \"MygoodMarguerite,\"Isaidtoher,\"IamgoingtoaskyourpermissiontogotoParis。Theydonotknowmyaddress,andI

  expecttherearelettersfrommyfatherwaitingforme。Ihavenodoubtheisconcerned;Ioughttoanswerhim。\"

  \"Go,myfriend,\"shesaid;\"butbebackearly。\"IwentstraighttoPrudence。

  \"Come,\"saidI,withoutbeatingaboutthebush,\"tellmefrankly,whereareMarguerite\'shorses?\"

  \"Sold。\"

  \"Theshawl?\"

  \"Sold。\"

  \"Thediamonds?\"

  \"Pawned。\"

  \"Andwhohassoldandpawnedthem?\"

  \"Whydidyounottellme?\"

  \"BecauseMargueritemademepromisenotto。\"

  \"Andwhydidyounotaskmeformoney?\"

  \"Becauseshewouldn\'tletme。\"

  \"Andwherehasthismoneygone?\"

  \"Inpayments。\"

  \"Isshemuchindebt?\"

  \"Thirtythousandfrancs,orthereabouts。Ah,mydearfellow,didn\'tItellyou?Youwouldn\'tbelieveme;nowyouareconvinced。Theupholstererwhomthedukehadagreedtosettlewithwasshownoutofthehousewhenhepresentedhimself,andthedukewrotenextdaytosaythathewouldanswerfornothinginregardtoMlle。Gautier。Thismanwantedhismoney;hewasgivenpartpaymentoutofthefewthousandfrancsthatIgotfromyou;thensomekindsoulswarnedhimthathisdebtorhadbeenabandonedbythedukeandwaslivingwithapennilessyoungman;

  theothercreditorsweretoldthesame;theyaskedfortheirmoney,andseizedsomeofthegoods。Margueritewantedtoselleverything,butitwastoolate,andbesidesIshouldhaveopposedit。Butitwasnecessarytopay,andinordernottoaskyouformoney,shesoldherhorsesandhershawls,andpawnedherjewels。Wouldyouliketoseethereceiptsandthepawntickets?\"

  AndPrudenceopenedthedrawerandshowedmethepapers。

  \"Ah,youthink,\"shecontinued,withtheinsistenceofawomanwhocansay,Iwasrightafterall,\"ah,youthinkitisenoughtobeinlove,andtogointothecountryandleadadreamy,pastorallife。No,myfriend,no。Bythesideofthatideallife,thereisamateriallife,andthepurestresolutionsareheldtoearthbythreadswhichseemslightenough,butwhichareofiron,noteasilytobebroken。IfMargueritehasnotbeenunfaithfultoyoutwentytimes,itisbecauseshehasanexceptionalnature。Itisnotmyfaultfornotadvisingherto,forIcouldn\'tbeartoseethepoorgirlstrippingherselfofeverything。Shewouldn\'t;

  sherepliedthatshelovedyou,andshewouldn\'tbeunfaithfultoyouforanythingintheworld。Allthatisverypretty,verypoetical,butonecan\'tpayone\'screditorsinthatcoin,andnowshecan\'tfreeherselffromdebt,unlessshecanraisethirtythousandfrancs。\"

  \"Allright,Iwillprovidethatamount。\"

  \"Youwillborrowit?\"

  \"Goodheavens!Why,yes!\"

  \"Afinethingthatwillbetodo;youwillfalloutwithyourfather,crippleyourresources,andonedoesn\'tfindthirtythousandfrancsfromonedaytoanother。Believeme,mydearArmand,Iknowwomenbetterthanyoudo;donotcommitthisfolly;youwillbesorryforitoneday。Bereasonable。Idon\'tadviseyoutoleaveMarguerite,butlivewithherasyoudidatthebeginning。Letherfindthemeanstogetoutofthisdifficulty。Thedukewillcomebackinalittlewhile。TheComtedeN。,ifshewouldtakehim,hetoldmeyesterdayeven,wouldpayallherdebts,andgiveherfourorfivethousandfrancsamonth。Hehastwohundredthousandayear。Itwouldbeapositionforher,whileyouwillcertainlybeobligedtoleaveher。Don\'twaittillyouareruined,especiallyastheComtedeN。isafool,andnothingwouldpreventyourstillbeingMarguerite\'slover。Shewouldcryalittleatthebeginning,butshewouldcometoaccustomherselftoit,andyouwouldthankmeonedayforwhatyouhaddone。ImaginethatMargueriteismarried,anddeceivethehusband;thatisall。Ihavealreadytoldyouallthisonce,onlyatthattimeitwasmerelyadvice,andnowitisalmostanecessity。\"

  WhatPrudencesaidwascruellytrue。

  \"Thisishowitis,\"shewenton,puttingawaythepapersshehadjustshownme;\"womenlikeMargueritealwaysforeseethatsomeonewilllovethem,neverthattheywilllove;otherwisetheywouldputasidemoney,andatthirtytheycouldaffordtheluxuryofhavingaloverfornothing。IfIhadonlyknownoncewhatI

  knownow!Inshort,saynothingtoMarguerite,andbringherbacktoParis。Youhavelivedwithheraloneforfourorfivemonths;

  thatisquiteenough。Shutyoureyesnow;thatisallthatanyoneasksofyou。AttheendofafortnightshewilltaketheComtedeN。,andshewillsaveupduringthewinter,andnextsummeryouwillbeginoveragain。Thatishowthingsaredone,mydearfellow!\"

  AndPrudenceappearedtobeenchantedwithheradvice,whichI

  refusedindignantly。

  Notonlymyloveandmydignitywouldnotletmeactthus,butI

  wascertainthat,feelingasshedidnow,Margueritewoulddieratherthanacceptanotherlover。

  \"Enoughjoking,\"IsaidtoPrudence;\"tellmeexactlyhowmuchMargueriteisinneedof。\"

  \"Ihavetoldyou:thirtythousandfrancs。\"

  \"Andwhendoessherequirethissum?\"

  \"Beforetheendoftwomonths。\"

  \"Sheshallhaveit。\"

  Prudenceshruggedhershoulders。

  \"Iwillgiveittoyou,\"Icontinued,\"butyoumustsweartomethatyouwillnottellMargueritethatIhavegivenittoyou。\"

  \"Don\'tbeafraid。\"

  \"Andifshesendsyouanythingelsetosellorpawn,letmeknow。\"

  \"Thereisnodanger。Shehasnothingleft。\"

  Iwentstraighttomyownhousetoseeiftherewereanylettersfrommyfather。Therewerefour。

  Chapter19

  Inhisfirstthreelettersmyfatherinquiredthecauseofmysilence;inthelastheallowedmetoseethathehadheardofmychangeoflife,andinformedmethathewasabouttocomeandseeme。

  Ihavealwayshadagreatrespectandasincereaffectionformyfather。IrepliedthatIhadbeentravellingforashorttime,andbeggedhimtoletmeknowbeforehandwhatdayhewouldarrive,sothatIcouldbetheretomeethim。

  Igavemyservantmyaddressinthecountry,tellinghimtobringmethefirstletterthatcamewiththepostmarkofC。,thenI

  returnedtoBougival。

  Margueritewaswaitingformeatthegardengate。Shelookedatmeanxiously。Throwingherarmsroundmyneck,shesaidtome:

  \"HaveyouseenPrudence?\"

  \"No。\"

  \"YouwerealongtimeinParis。\"

  \"IfoundlettersfrommyfathertowhichIhadtoreply。\"

  AfewminutesafterwardNanineentered,alloutofbreath。

  Margueriteroseandtalkedwithherinwhispers。WhenNaninehadgoneoutMargueritesatdownbymeagainandsaid,takingmyhand:

  \"Whydidyoudeceiveme?YouwenttoseePrudence。\"

  \"Whotoldyou?\"

  \"Nanine。\"

  \"Andhowdidsheknow?\"

  \"Shefollowedyou。\"

  \"Youtoldhertofollowme?\"

  \"Yes。IthoughtthatyoumusthavehadaverystrongmotiveforgoingtoParis,afternotleavingmeforfourmonths。Iwasafraidthatsomethingmighthappentoyou,orthatyouwereperhapsgoingtoseeanotherwoman。\"

  \"Child!\"

  \"NowIamrelieved。Iknowwhatyouhavedone,butIdon\'tyetknowwhatyouhavebeentold。\"

  IshowedMargueritemyfather\'sletters。

  \"ThatisnotwhatIamaskingyouabout。WhatIwanttoknowiswhyyouwenttoseePrudence。\"

  \"Toseeher。\"

  \"That\'salie,myfriend。\"

  \"Well,Iwenttoaskherifthehorsewasanybetter,andifshewantedyourshawlandyourjewelsanylonger。\"

  Margueriteblushed,butdidnotanswer。

  \"And,\"Icontinued,\"Ilearnedwhatyouhaddonewithyourhorses,shawls,andjewels。\"

  \"Andyouarevexed?\"

  \"Iamvexedthatitneveroccurredtoyoutoaskmeforwhatyouwereinwantof。\"

  \"Inaliaisonlikeours,ifthewomanhasanysenseofdignityatall,sheoughttomakeeverypossiblesacrificeratherthanaskherloverformoneyandsogiveavenalcharactertoherlove。

  Youloveme,Iamsure,butyoudonotknowonhowslightathreaddependstheloveonehasforawomanlikeme。Whoknows?

  Perhapssomedaywhenyouwereboredorworriedyouwouldfancyyousawacarefullyconcertedplaninourliaison。Prudenceisachatterbox。WhatneedhadIofthehorses?Itwasaneconomytosellthem。Idon\'tusethemandIdon\'tspendanythingontheirkeep;ifyouloveme,Iasknothingmore,andyouwilllovemejustasmuchwithouthorses,orshawls,ordiamonds。\"

  AllthatwassaidsonaturallythatthetearscametomyeyesasIlistened。

  \"But,mygoodMarguerite,\"Ireplied,pressingherhandslovingly,\"youknewthatonedayIshoulddiscoverthesacrificeyouhadmade,andthatthemomentIdiscovereditIshouldallowitnolonger。\"

  \"Butwhy?\"

  \"Because,mydearchild,Icannotallowyouraffectionformetodepriveyouofevenatrinket。Itooshouldnotlikeyoutobeable,inamomentwhenyouwereboredorworried,tothinkthatifyouwerelivingwithsomebodyelsethosemomentswouldnotexist;andtorepent,ifonlyforaminute,oflivingwithme。Inafewdaysyourhorses,yourdiamonds,andyourshawlsshallbereturnedtoyou。Theyareasnecessarytoyouasairistolife,anditmaybeabsurd,butIlikeyoubettershowythansimple。\"

  \"Thenyounolongerloveme。\"

  \"Foolishcreature!\"

  \"Ifyoulovedme,youwouldletmeloveyoumyownway;onthecontrary,youpersistinonlyseeinginmeawomantowhomluxuryisindispensable,andwhomyouthinkyouarealwaysobligedtopay。Youareashamedtoaccepttheproofofmylove。Inspiteofyourself,youthinkofleavingmesomeday,andyouwanttoputyourdisinterestednessbeyondriskofsuspicion。Youareright,myfriend,butIhadbetterhopes。\"

  AndMargueritemadeamotiontorise;Iheldher,andsaidtoher:

  \"Iwantyoutobehappyandtohavenothingtoreproachmefor,thatisall。\"

  \"Andwearegoingtobeseparated!\"

  \"Why,Marguerite,whocanseparateus?\"Icried。

  \"You,whowillnotletmetakeyouonyourownlevel,butinsistontakingmeonmine;you,whowishmetokeeptheluxuryinthemidstofwhichIhavelived,andsokeepthemoraldistancewhichseparatesus;you,whodonotbelievethatmyaffectionissufficientlydisinterestedtosharewithmewhatyouhave,thoughwecouldlivehappilyenoughonittogether,andwouldratherruinyourself,becauseyouarestillboundbyafoolishprejudice。DoyoureallythinkthatIcouldcompareacarriageanddiamondswithyourlove?Doyouthinkthatmyrealhappinessliesinthetriflesthatmeansomuchwhenonehasnothingtolove,butwhichbecometriflingindeedwhenonehas?Youwillpaymydebts,realizeyourestate,andthenkeepme?Howlongwillthatlast?Twoorthreemonths,andthenitwillbetoolatetolivethelifeIpropose,forthenyouwillhavetotakeeverythingfromme,andthatiswhatamanofhonourcannotdo;

  whilenowyouhaveeightortenthousandfrancsayear,onwhichweshouldbeabletolive。IwillselltherestofwhatIdonotwant,andwiththisaloneIwillmaketwothousandfrancsayear。

  Wewilltakeanicelittleflatinwhichwecanbothlive。Inthesummerwewillgointothecountry,nottoahouselikethis,buttoahousejustbigenoughfortwopeople。Youareindependent,I

  amfree,weareyoung;inheaven\'sname,Armand,donotdrivemebackintothelifeIhadtoleadonce!\"

  Icouldnotanswer。Tearsofgratitudeandlovefilledmyeyes,andIflungmyselfintoMarguerite\'sarms。

  \"Iwanted,\"shecontinued,\"toarrangeeverythingwithouttellingyou,payallmydebts,andtakeanewflat。InOctoberweshouldhavebeenbackinParis,andallwouldhavecomeout;butsincePrudencehastoldyouall,youwillhavetoagreebeforehand,insteadofagreeingafterward。Doyoulovemeenoughforthat?\"

  Itwasimpossibletoresistsuchdevotion。Ikissedherhandsardently,andsaid:

  \"Iwilldowhateveryouwish。\"

  Itwasagreedthatweshoulddoasshehadplanned。Thereupon,shewentwildwithdelight;danced,sang,amusedherselfwithcallinguppicturesofhernewflatinallitssimplicity,andbegantoconsultmeastoitspositionandarrangement。Isawhowhappyandproudshewasofthisresolution,whichseemedasifitwouldbringusintocloserandcloserrelationship,andI

  resolvedtodomyownshare。InaninstantIdecidedthewholecourseofmylife。Iputmyaffairsinorder,andmadeovertoMargueritetheincomewhichhadcometomefrommymother,andwhichseemedlittleenoughinreturnforthesacrificewhichI

  wasaccepting。Thereremainedthefivethousandfrancsayearfrommyfather;and,whateverhappened,Ihadalwaysenoughtoliveon。IdidnottellMargueritewhatIhaddone,certainasI

  wasthatshewouldrefusethegift。ThisincomecamefromamortgageofsixtythousandfrancsonahousethatIhadneverevenseen。AllthatIknewwasthateverythreemonthsmyfather\'ssolicitor,anoldfriendofthefamily,handedovertomesevenhundredandfiftyfrancsinreturnformyreceipt。

  ThedaywhenMargueriteandIcametoParistolookforaflat,I

  wenttothissolicitorandaskedhimwhathadtobedoneinordertomakeoverthisincometoanotherperson。ThegoodmanimaginedIwasruined,andquestionedmeastothecauseofmydecision。

  AsIknewthatIshouldbeobliged,soonerorlater,tosayinwhosefavourImadethistransfer,Ithoughtitbesttotellhimthetruthatonce。Hemadenoneoftheobjectionsthathispositionasfriendandsolicitorauthorizedhimtomake,andassuredmethathewouldarrangethewholeaffairinthebestwaypossible。Naturally,Ibeggedhimtoemploythegreatestdiscretioninregardtomyfather,andonleavinghimIrejoinedMarguerite,whowaswaitingformeatJulieDuprat\'s,whereshehadgoneinpreferencetogoingtolistentothemoralizingsofPrudence。

  Webegantolookoutforflats。AllthosethatwesawseemedtoMargueritetoodear,andtometoosimple。However,wefinallyfound,inoneofthequietestpartsofParis,alittlehouse,isolatedfromthemainpartofthebuilding。Behindthislittlehousewasacharminggarden,surroundedbywallshighenoughtoscreenusfromourneighbours,andlowenoughnottoshutoffourownview。Itwasbetterthanourexpectations。

  WhileIwenttogivenoticeatmyownflat,Margueritewenttoseeabusinessagent,who,shetoldme,hadalreadydoneforoneofherfriendsexactlywhatshewantedhimtodoforher。ShecameontotheRuedeProvenceinastateofgreatdelight。Themanhadpromisedtopayallherdebts,togiveherareceiptfortheamount,andtohandovertohertwentythousandfrancs,inreturnforthewholeofherfurniture。Youhaveseenbytheamounttakenatthesalethatthishonestmanwouldhavegainedthirtythousandfrancsoutofhisclient。

  WewentbackjoyouslytoBougival,talkingoverourprojectsforthefuture,which,thankstoourheedlessness,andespeciallytoourlove,wesawintherosiestlight。

  Aweeklater,aswewerehavinglunch,Naninecametotellusthatmyservantwasaskingforme。\"Lethimcomein,\"Isaid。

  \"Sir,\"saidhe,\"yourfatherhasarrivedinParis,andbegsyoutoreturnatoncetoyourrooms,whereheiswaitingforyou。\"

  Thispieceofnewswasthemostnaturalthingintheworld,yet,asweheardit,MargueriteandIlookedatoneanother。Weforesawtrouble。Beforeshehadspokenaword,Irepliedtoherthought,and,takingherhand,Isaid,\"Fearnothing。\"

  \"Comebackassoonaspossible,\"whisperedMarguerite,embracingme;\"Iwillwaitforyouatthewindow。\"

  IsentonJosephtotellmyfatherthatIwasonmyway。TwohourslaterIwasattheRuedeProvence。

  Chapter20

  Myfatherwasseatedinmyroominhisdressing-gown;hewaswriting,andIsawatonce,bythewayinwhichheraisedhiseyestomewhenIcamein,thattherewasgoingtobeaseriousdiscussion。Iwentuptohim,allthesame,asifIhadseennothinginhisface,embracedhim,andsaid:

  \"Whendidyoucome,father?\"

  \"Lastnight。\"

  \"Didyoucomestraighthere,asusual?\"

  \"Yes。\"

  \"Iamverysorrynottohavebeenheretoreceiveyou。\"

  Iexpectedthatthesermonwhichmyfather\'scoldfacethreatenedwouldbeginatonce;buthesaidnothing,sealedtheletterwhichhehadjustwritten,andgaveittoJosephtopost。

  Whenwewerealone,myfatherrose,andleaningagainstthemantel-piece,saidtome:

  \"MydearArmand,wehaveseriousmatterstodiscuss。\"

  \"Iamlistening,father。\"

  \"Youpromisemetobefrank?\"

  \"AmInotaccustomedtobeso?\"

  \"IsitnottruethatyouarelivingwithawomancalledMargueriteGautier?\"

  \"Yes。\"

  \"Doyouknowwhatthiswomanwas?\"

  \"Akeptwoman。\"

  \"Anditisforherthatyouhaveforgottentocomeandseeyoursisterandmethisyear?\"

  \"Yes,father,Iadmitit。\"

  \"Youareverymuchinlovewiththiswoman?\"

  \"Youseeit,father,sinceshehasmademefailindutytowardyou,forwhichIhumblyaskyourforgivenessto-day。\"

  Myfather,nodoubt,wasnotexpectingsuchcategoricalanswers,forheseemedtoreflectamoment,andthensaidtome:

  \"Youhave,ofcourse,realizedthatyoucannotalwayslivelikethat?\"

  \"Ifearso,father,butIhavenotrealizedit。\"

  \"Butyoumustrealize,\"continuedmyfather,inadryertone,\"thatI,atallevents,shouldnotpermitit。\"

  \"IhavesaidtomyselfthataslongasIdidnothingcontrarytotherespectwhichIowetothetraditionalprobityofthefamilyIcouldliveasIamliving,andthishasreassuredmesomewhatinregardtothefearsIhavehad。\"

  Passionsareformidableenemiestosentiment。Iwaspreparedforeverystruggle,evenwithmyfather,inorderthatImightkeepMarguerite。

  \"Then,themomentiscomewhenyoumustliveotherwise。\"

  \"Why,father?\"

  \"Becauseyouaredoingthingswhichoutragetherespectthatyouimagineyouhaveforyourfamily。\"

  \"Idon\'tfollowyourmeaning。\"

  \"Iwillexplainittoyou。Haveamistressifyouwill;payherasamanofhonourisboundtopaythewomanwhomhekeeps,byallmeans;butthatyoushouldcometoforgetthemostsacredthingsforher,thatyoushouldletthereportofyourscandalouslifereachmyquietcountryside,andsetablotonthehonourablenamethatIhavegivenyou,itcannot,itshallnotbe。\"

  \"Permitmetotellyou,father,thatthosewhohavegivenyouinformationaboutmehavebeenill-informed。IamtheloverofMlle。Gautier;Ilivewithher;itisthemostnaturalthingintheworld。IdonotgiveMlle。Gautierthenameyouhavegivenme;Ispendonheraccountwhatmymeansallowmetospend;I

  havenodebts;and,inshort,Iamnotinapositionwhichauthorizesafathertosaytohissonwhatyouhavejustsaidtome。\"

  \"Afatherisalwaysauthorizedtorescuehissonoutofevilpaths。Youhavenotdoneanyharmyet,butyouwilldoit。\"

  \"Father!\"

  \"Sir,Iknowmoreoflifethanyoudo。Therearenoentirelypuresentimentsexceptinperfectlychastewomen。EveryManoncanhaveherownDesGrieux,andtimesarechanged。Itwouldbeuselessfortheworldtogrowolderifitdidnotcorrectitsways。Youwillleaveyourmistress。\"

  \"Iamverysorrytodisobeyyou,father,butitisimpossible。\"

  \"Iwillcompelyoutodoso。\"

  \"Unfortunately,father,therenolongerexistsaSainteMargueritetowhichcourtesanscanbesent,and,eveniftherewere,IwouldfollowMlle。Gautierifyousucceededinhavinghersentthere。Whatwouldyouhave?Perhapsaminthewrong,butI

  canonlybehappyaslongasIamtheloverofthiswoman。\"

  \"Come,Armand,openyoureyes。Recognisethatitisyourfatherwhospeakstoyou,yourfatherwhohasalwayslovedyou,andwhoonlydesiresyourhappiness。Isithonourableforyoutolivelikehusbandandwifewithawomanwhomeverybodyhashad?\"

  \"Whatdoesitmatter,father,ifnoonewillanymore?Whatdoesitmatter,ifthiswomanlovesme,ifherwholelifeischangedthroughthelovewhichshehasformeandthelovewhichIhaveforher?Whatdoesitmatter,ifshehasbecomeadifferentwoman?\"

  \"Doyouthink,then,sir,thatthemissionofamanofhonouristogoaboutconvertinglostwomen?DoyouthinkthatGodhasgivensuchagrotesqueaimtolife,andthattheheartshouldhaveanyroomforenthusiasmofthatkind?Whatwillbetheendofthismarvellouscure,andwhatwillyouthinkofwhatyouaresayingto-daybythetimeyouareforty?Youwilllaughatthisloveofyours,ifyoucanstilllaugh,andifithasnotlefttooseriousatraceinyourpast。Whatwouldyoubenowifyourfatherhadhadyourideasandhadgivenuphislifetoeveryimpulseofthiskind,insteadofrootinghimselffirmlyinconvictionsofhonourandsteadfastness?Thinkitover,Armand,anddonottalkanymoresuchabsurdities。Come,leavethiswoman;yourfatherentreatsyou。\"

  Ianswerednothing。

  \"Armand,\"continuedmyfather,\"inthenameofyoursaintedmother,abandonthislife,whichyouwillforgetmoreeasilythanyouthink。Youaretiedtoitbyanimpossibletheory。Youaretwenty-four;thinkofthefuture。Youcannotalwayslovethiswoman,whoalsocannotalwaysloveyou。Youbothexaggerateyourlove。Youputanendtoyourwholecareer。Onestepfurther,andyouwillnolongerbeabletoleavethepathyouhavechosen,andyouwillsufferallyourlifeforwhatyouhavedoneinyouryouth。LeaveParis。Comeandstayforamonthortwowithyoursisterandme。Restinourquietfamilyaffectionwillsoonhealyouofthisfever,foritisnothingelse。Meanwhile,yourmistresswillconsoleherself;shewilltakeanotherlover;andwhenyouseewhatitisforwhichyouhaveallbutbrokenwithyourfather,andallbutlosthislove,youwilltellmethatI

  havedonewelltocomeandseekyouout,andyouwillthankmeforit。Come,youwillgowithme,Armand,willyounot?\"Ifeltthatmyfatherwouldberightifithadbeenanyotherwoman,butIwasconvincedthathewaswrongwithregardtoMarguerite。

  Nevertheless,thetoneinwhichhesaidtheselastwordswassokind,soappealing,thatIdarednotanswer。

  \"Well?\"saidheinatremblingvoice。

  \"Well,father,Icanpromisenothing,\"Isaidatlast;\"whatyouaskofmeisbeyondmypower。Believeme,\"Icontinued,seeinghimmakeanimpatientmovement,\"youexaggeratetheeffectsofthisliaison。Margueriteisadifferentkindofawomanfromwhatyouthink。Thislove,farfromleadingmeastray,iscapable,onthecontrary,ofsettingmeintherightdirection。Lovealwaysmakesamanbetter,nomatterwhatwomaninspiresit。IfyouknewMarguerite,youwouldunderstandthatIaminnodanger。Sheisasnobleasthenoblestofwomen。Thereisasmuchdisinterestednessinherasthereiscupidityinothers。\"

  \"Allofwhichdoesnotpreventherfromacceptingthewholeofyourfortune,forthesixtythousandfrancswhichcometoyoufromyourmother,andwhichyouaregivingher,are,understandmewell,yourwholefortune。\"

  Myfatherhadprobablykeptthisperorationandthisthreatforthelaststroke。Iwasfirmerbeforethesethreatsthanbeforehisentreaties。

  \"WhotoldyouthatIwashandingthissumtoher?\"Iasked。

  \"Mysolicitor。Couldanhonestmancarryoutsuchaprocedurewithoutwarningme?Well,itistopreventyoufromruiningyourselfforaprostitutethatIamnowinParis。Yourmother,whenshedied,leftyouenoughtoliveonrespectably,andnottosquanderonyourmistresses。\"

  \"Isweartoyou,father,thatMargueriteknewnothingofthistransfer。\"

  \"Why,then,doyoumakeit?\"

  \"BecauseMarguerite,thewomanyoucalumniate,andwhomyouwishmetoabandon,issacrificingallthatshepossessesinordertolivewithme。\"

  \"Andyouacceptthissacrifice?Whatsortofamanareyou,sir,toallowMlle。Gautiertosacrificeanythingforyou?Come,enoughofthis。Youwillleavethiswoman。JustnowIbeggedyou;

  nowIcommandyou。Iwillhavenosuchscandalousdoingsinmyfamily。Packupyourthingsandgetreadytocomewithme。\"

  \"Pardonme,father,\"Isaid,\"butIshallnotcome。\"

  \"Andwhy?\"

  \"BecauseIamatanagewhennooneanylongerobeysacommand。\"

  Myfatherturnedpaleatmyanswer。

  \"Verywell,sir,\"hesaid,\"Iknowwhatremainstobedone。\"

  HerangandJosephappeared。

  \"HavemythingstakentotheHoteldeParis,\"hesaidtomyservant。Andthereuponhewenttohisroomandfinisheddressing。

  Whenhereturned,Iwentuptohim。

  \"Promiseme,father,\"Isaid,\"thatyouwilldonothingtogiveMargueritepain?\"

  Myfatherstopped,lookedatmedisdainfully,andcontentedhimselfwithsaying,\"Ibelieveyouaremad。\"Afterthishewentout,shuttingthedoorviolentlyafterhim。

  Iwentdownstairs,tookacab,andreturnedtoBougival。

  Margueritewaswaitingformeatthewindow。

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