\"Butthisisameretrifle。Mymother，distractedtothehighestdegree，andyetlessafflictedthanI，determinedtoabsentherselfforsometimefromsofatalaplace。AsshehadaveryfineestateintheneighborhoodofGaeta，weembarkedonboardagalley，whichwasgildedlikethehighaltarofSt。
Peter’s，atRome。InourpassagewewereboardedbyaSalleerover。OurmendefendedthemselvesliketruePope’ssoldiers;theyflungthemselvesupontheirknees，laiddowntheirarms，andbeggedthecorsairtogivethemabsolutioninarticulomortis。
\"TheMoorspresentlystrippedusasbareaseverwewereborn。Mymother，mymaidsofhonor，andmyself，wereservedallinthesamemanner。Itisamazinghowquickthesegentryareatundressingpeople。
Butwhatsurprisedmemostwas，thattheymadearudesortofsurgicalexaminationofpartsofthebodywhicharesacredtothefunctionsofnature。Ithoughtitaverystrangekindofceremony;forthuswearegenerallyapttojudgeofthingswhenwehavenotseentheworld。Iafterwardslearnedthatitwastodiscoverifwehadanydiamondsconcealed。Thispracticehadbeenestablishedsincetimeimmemorialamongthosecivilizednationsthatscourtheseas。IwasinformedthatthereligiousKnightsofMaltaneverfailtomakethissearchwheneveranyMoorsofeithersexfallintotheirhands。Itisapartofthelawofnations，fromwhichtheyneverdeviate。
\"IneednottellyouhowgreatahardshipitwasforayoungprincessandhermothertobemadeslavesandcarriedtoMorocco。Youmayeasilyimaginewhatwemusthavesufferedonboardacorsair。
Mymotherwasstillextremelyhandsome，ourmaidsofhonor，andevenourcommonwaiting-women，hadmorecharmsthanweretobefoundinallAfrica。
\"Astomyself，Iwasenchanting;Iwasbeautyitself，andthenIhadmyvirginity。But，alas！Ididnotretainitlong;thispreciousflower，whichhadbeenreservedforthelovelyPrinceofMassaCarrara，wascroppedbythecaptainoftheMoorishvessel，whowasahideousNegro，andthoughthedidmeinfinitehonor。Indeed，boththePrincessofPalestrinaandmyselfmusthavehadverystrongconstitutionstoundergoallthehardshipsandviolenceswesufferedbeforeourarrivalatMorocco。ButIwillnotdetainyouanylongerwithsuchcommonthings;theyarehardlyworthmentioning。
\"UponourarrivalatMoroccowefoundthatkingdomdelugedwithblood。
FiftysonsoftheEmperorMuleyIshmaelwereeachattheheadofaparty。
Thisproducedfiftycivilwarsofblacksagainstblacks，oftawniesagainsttawnies，andofmulattoesagainstmulattoes。Inshort，thewholeempirewasonecontinuedsceneofcarnage。
\"Nosoonerwerewelandedthanapartyofblacks，ofacontraryfactiontothatofmycaptain，cametorobhimofhisbooty。Nexttothemoneyandjewels，wewerethemostvaluablethingshehad。IwitnessedonthisoccasionsuchabattleasyouneverbeheldinyourcoldEuropeanclimates。
Thenorthernnationshavenotthatfermentationintheirblood，northatraginglustforwomenthatissocommoninAfrica。ThenativesofEuropeseemtohavetheirveinsfilledwithmilkonly;butfireandvitriolcirculateinthoseoftheinhabitantsofMountAtlasandtheneighboringprovinces。Theyfoughtwiththefuryofthelions，tigers，andserpentsoftheircountry，todecidewhoshouldhaveus。AMoorseizedmymotherbytherightarm，whilemycaptain’slieutenantheldherbytheleft;anotherMoorlaidholdofherbytherightleg，andoneofourcorsairsheldherbytheother。Inthismanneralmostallofourwomenweredraggedbyfoursoldiers。
\"Mycaptainkeptmeconcealedbehindhim，andwithhisdrawnscimitarcutdowneveryonewhoopposedhim;atlengthIsawallourItalianwomenandmymothermangledandtorninpiecesbythemonsterswhocontendedforthem。Thecaptives，mycompanions，theMoorswhotookus，thesoldiers，thesailors，theblacks，thewhites，themulattoes，andlastly，mycaptainhimself，wereallslain，andIremainedaloneexpiringuponaheapofdeadbodies。Similarbarbarousscenesweretransactedeverydayoverthewholecountry，whichisofthreehundredleaguesinextent，andyettheynevermissedthefivestatedtimesofprayerenjoinedbytheirprophetMahomet。
\"Idisengagedmyselfwithgreatdifficultyfromsuchaheapofcorpses，andmadeashifttocrawltoalargeorangetreethatstoodonthebankofaneighboringrivulet，whereIfelldownexhaustedwithfatigue，andoverwhelmedwithhorror，despair，andhunger。Mysensesbeingoverpowered，Ifellasleep，orratherseemedtobeinatrance。ThusIlayinastateofweaknessandinsensibilitybetweenlifeanddeath，whenIfeltmyselfpressedbysomethingthatmovedupanddownuponmybody。Thisbroughtmetomyself。Iopenedmyeyes，andsawaprettyfair-facedman，whosighedandmutteredthesewordsbetweenhisteeth，’Ochesciagurad’esseresenzacoglioni！’\"
chapter12CHAPTERXII
THEADVENTURESOFTHEOLDWOMANCONTINUED
Astonishedanddelightedtohearmynativelanguage，andnolesssurprisedattheyoungman’swords，Itoldhimthattherewerefargreatermisfortunesintheworldthanwhathecomplainedof。Andtoconvincehimofit，Igavehimashorthistoryofthehorribledisastersthathadbefallenme;andassoonasIhadfinished，fellintoaswoonagain。
\"Hecarriedmeinhisarmstoaneighboringcottage，wherehehadmeputtobed，procuredmesomethingtoeat，waitedonmewiththegreatestattention，comfortedme，caressedme，toldmethathehadneverseenanythingsoperfectlybeautifulasmyself，andthathehadneversomuchregrettedthelossofwhatnoonecouldrestoretohim。
\"’IwasbornatNaples，’saidhe，’wheretheymakeeunuchsofthousandsofchildreneveryyear;somedieoftheoperation;someacquirevoicesfarbeyondthemosttunefulofyourladies;andothersaresenttogovernstatesandempires。Iunderwentthisoperationverysuccessfully，andwasoneofthesingersinthePrincessofPalestrina’schapel。’
\"’How，’criedI，’inmymother’schapel！’
\"’ThePrincessofPalestrina，yourmother！’criedhe，burstingintoafloodoftears。’IsitpossibleyoushouldbethebeautifulyoungprincesswhomIhadthecareofbringinguptillshewassixyearsold，andwhoatthattenderagepromisedtobeasfairasInowbeholdyou？’
\"’Iamthesame，’Ireplied。’Mymotherliesaboutahundredyardsfromherecutinpiecesandburiedunderaheapofdeadbodies。’
\"Ithenrelatedtohimallthathadbefallenme，andheinreturnacquaintedmewithallhisadventures，andhowhehadbeensenttothecourtoftheKingofMoroccobyaChristianprincetoconcludeatreatywiththatmonarch;inconsequenceofwhichhewastobefurnishedwithmilitarystores，andshipstodestroythecommerceofotherChristiangovernments。
\"’Ihaveexecutedmycommission，’saidtheeunuch;’IamgoingtotakeshipatCeuta，andI’lltakeyoualongwithmetoItaly。Machesciagurad’esseresenzacoglioni！’
\"Ithankedhimwithtearsofjoy，but，notwithstanding，insteadoftakingmewithhimtoItaly，hecarriedmetoAlgiers，andsoldmetotheDeyofthatprovince。Ihadnotbeenlongaslavewhentheplague，whichhadmadethetourofAfrica，Asia，andEurope，brokeoutatAlgierswithredoubledfury。
Youhaveseenanearthquake;buttellme，miss，haveyoueverhadtheplague？\"
\"Never\"，answeredtheyoungBaroness。
\"Ifyouhadeverhadit\"，continuedtheoldwoman，\"youwouldownanearthquakewasatrifletoit。ItisverycommoninAfrica;
Iwasseizedwithit。
FiguretoyourselfthedistressedconditionofthedaughterofaPope，onlyfifteenyearsold，andwhoinlessthanthreemonthshadfeltthemiseriesofpovertyandslavery;hadbeendebauchedalmosteveryday;
hadbeheldhermothercutintofourquarters;hadexperiencedthescourgesoffamineandwar;andwasnowdyingoftheplagueatAlgiers。Ididnot，however，dieofit;butmyeunuch，andtheDey，andalmostthewholeseraglioofAlgiers，weresweptoff。
\"Assoonasthefirstfuryofthisdreadfulpestilencewasover，asalewasmadeoftheDey’sslaves。IwaspurchasedbyamerchantwhocarriedmetoTunis。Thismansoldmetoanothermerchant，whosoldmeagaintoanotheratTripoli;fromTripoliIwassoldtoAlexandria，fromAlexandriatoSmyrna，andfromSmyrnatoConstantinople。Aftermanychanges，IatlengthbecamethepropertyofanAgaoftheJanissaries，who，soonafterI
cameintohispossession，wasorderedawaytothedefenseofAzoff，thenbesiegedbytheRussians。
\"TheAga，beingveryfondofwomen，tookhiswholeseragliowithhim，andlodgedusinasmallfort，withtwoblackeunuchsandtwentysoldiersforourguard。OurarmymadeagreatslaughteramongtheRussians;
buttheysoonreturnedusthecompliment。Azoffwastakenbystorm，andtheenemysparedneitherage，sex，norcondition，butputalltothesword，andlaidthecityinashes。Ourlittlefortaloneheldout;theyresolvedtoreduceusbyfamine。Thetwentyjanissaries，whowerelefttodefendit，hadboundthemselvesbyanoathnevertosurrendertheplace。Beingreducedtotheextremityoffamine，theyfoundthemselvesobligedtokillourtwoeunuchs，andeatthemratherthanviolatetheiroath。Butthishorriblerepastsoonfailingthem，theynextdeterminedtodevourthewomen。
\"Wehadaverypiousandhumaneman，whogavethemamostexcellentsermononthisoccasion，exhortingthemnottokillusallatonce。’Cutoffonlyoneofthebuttocksofeachofthoseladies，’saidhe，’andyouwillfareextremelywell;ifyouareunderthenecessityofhavingrecoursetothesameexpedientagain，youwillfindthelikesupplyafewdayshence。
Heavenwillapproveofsocharitableanaction，andworkyourdeliverance。’
\"Bytheforceofthiseloquenceheeasilypersuadedthem，andallofusunderwenttheoperation。Themanappliedthesamebalsamastheydotochildrenaftercircumcision。Wewereallreadytogiveuptheghost。
\"TheJanissarieshadscarcelytimetofinishtherepastwithwhichwehadsuppliedthem，whentheRussiansattackedtheplacebymeansofflat-bottomedboats，andnotasinglejanissaryescaped。
TheRussianspaidnoregardtotheconditionwewerein;butthereareFrenchsurgeonsinallpartsoftheworld，andoneofthemtookusunderhiscare，andcuredus。I
shallneverforget，whileIlive，thatassoonasmywoundswereperfectlyhealedhemademecertainproposals。Ingeneral，hedesiredusalltobeofagoodcheer，assuringusthatthelikehadhappenedinmanysieges;andthatitwasperfectlyagreeabletothelawsofwar。
\"Assoonasmycompanionswereinaconditiontowalk，theyweresenttoMoscow。Asforme，IfelltothelotofaBoyard，whoputmetoworkinhisgarden，andgavemetwentylashesaday。Butthisnoblemanhavingabouttwoyearsafterwardsbeenbrokenaliveuponthewheel，withaboutthirtyothers，forsomecourtintrigues，Itookadvantageoftheevent，andmademyescape。ItraveledoveragreatpartofRussia。Iwasalongtimeaninnkeeper’sservantatRiga，thenatRostock，Wismar，Leipsic，Cassel，Utrecht，Leyden，TheHague，andRotterdam。Ihavegrownoldinmiseryanddisgrace，livingwithonlyonebuttock，andhavinginperpetualremembrancethatIamaPope’sdaughter。Ihavebeenahundredtimesuponthepointofkillingmyself，butstillIwasfondoflife。Thisridiculousweaknessis，perhaps，oneofthedangerousprinciplesimplantedinournature。Forwhatcanbemoreabsurdthantopersistincarryingaburdenofwhichwewishtobeeased？todetest，andyettostrivetopreserveourexistence？Inaword，tocaresstheserpentthatdevoursus，andhughimclosetoourbosomstillhehasgnawedintoourhearts？
\"Inthedifferentcountrieswhichithasbeenmyfatetotraverse，andatthemanyinnswhereIhavebeenaservant，Ihaveobservedaprodigiousnumberofpeoplewhoheldtheirexistenceinabhorrence，andyetIneverknewmorethantwelvewhovoluntarilyputanendtotheirmisery;namely，threeNegroes，fourEnglishmen，asmanyGenevese，andaGermanprofessornamedRobek。MylastplacewaswiththeJew，DonIssachar，whoplacedmenearyourperson，myfairlady;towhosefortunesIhaveattachedmyself，andhavebeenmoreconcernedwithyouradventuresthanwithmyown。Ishouldneverhaveevenmentionedthelattertoyou，hadyounotalittlepiquedmeontheheadofsufferings;andifitwerenotcustomarytotellstoriesonboardashipinordertopassawaythetime。
\"Inshort，mydearmiss，Ihaveagreatdealofknowledgeandexperienceintheworld，thereforetakemyadvice：divertyourself，andprevailuponeachpassengertotellhisstory，andifthereisoneofthemallthathasnotcursedhisexistencemanytimes，andsaidtohimselfoverandoveragainthathewasthemostwretchedofmortals，Igiveyouleavetothrowmeheadfirstintothesea。\"
chapter13CHAPTERXIII
HOWCANDIDEWASOBLIGEDTOLEAVETHE
FAIR
CUNEGONDEANDTHEOLDWOMAN
ThefairCunegonde，beingthusmadeacquaintedwiththehistoryoftheoldwoman’slifeandadventures，paidheralltherespectandcivilityduetoapersonofherrankandmerit。Sheveryreadilyaccededtoherproposalofengagingthepassengerstorelatetheiradventuresintheirturns，andwasatlength，aswellasCandide，compelledtoacknowledgethattheoldwomanwasintheright。
\"Itisathousandpities\"，saidCandide，\"thatthesagePanglossshouldhavebeenhangedcontrarytothecustomofanauto-da-fe，forhewouldhavegivenusamostadmirablelectureonthemoralandphysicalevilwhichoverspreadstheearthandsea;andIthinkIshouldhavecourageenoughtopresumetooffer（withallduerespect）somefewobjections。\"
Whileeveryonewasrecitinghisadventures，theshipcontinuedonherway，andatlengtharrivedatBuenosAyres，whereCunegonde，CaptainCandide，andtheoldwoman，landedandwenttowaituponthegovernor，DonFernandod’IbaraayFigueorayMascarenesyLampourdosySouza。
Thisnoblemancarriedhimselfwithahaughtinesssuitabletoapersonwhoboresomanynames。Hespokewiththemostnobledisdaintoeveryone，carriedhisnosesohigh，strainedhisvoicetosuchapitch，assumedsoimperiousanair，andstalkedwithsomuchloftinessandpride，thateveryonewhohadthehonorofconversingwithhimwasviolentlytemptedtobastinadeHisExcellency。Hewasimmoderatelyfondofwomen，andMissCunegondeappearedinhiseyesaparagonofbeauty。Thefirstthinghedidwastoaskherifshewasnotthecaptain’swife。TheairwithwhichhemadethisdemandalarmedCandide，whodidnotdaretosayhewasmarriedtoher，becauseindeedhewasnot;neitherdidheventuretosayshewashissister，becauseshewasnot;andthoughalieofthisnatureprovedofgreatservicetooneoftheancients，andmightpossiblybeusefultosomeofthemoderns，yetthepurityofhisheartwouldnotpermithimtoviolatethetruth。
\"MissCunegonde\"，repliedhe，\"istodomethehonortomarryme，andwehumblybeseechYourExcellencytocondescendtogracetheceremonywithyourpresence。\"
DonFernandod’IbaraayFigueorayMascarenesyLampourdosySouza，twirlinghismustachio，andputtingonasarcasticsmile，orderedCaptainCandidetogoandreviewhiscompany。ThegentleCandideobeyed，andtheGovernorwasleftwithMissCunegonde。Hemadeherastrongdeclarationoflove，protestingthathewasreadytogiveherhishandinthefaceoftheChurch，orotherwise，asshouldappearmostagreeabletoayoungladyofherprodigiousbeauty。Cunegondedesiredleavetoretireaquarterofanhourtoconsulttheoldwoman，anddeterminehowsheshouldproceed。
Theoldwomangaveherthefollowingcounsel：
\"Miss，youhaveseventy-twoquarteringsinyourarms，itistrue，butyouhavenotapennytoblessyourselfwith。ItisyourownfaultifyoudonotbecomethewifeofoneofthegreatestnoblemeninSouthAmerica，withanexceedingfinemustachio。Whatbusinesshaveyoutoprideyourselfuponanunshakenconstancy？YouhavebeenoutragedbyaBulgariansoldier;aJewandanInquisitorhavebothtastedofyourfavors。
Peopletakeadvantageofmisfortunes。Imustconfess，wereIinyourplace，Ishould，withouttheleastscruple，givemyhandtotheGovernor，andtherebymakethefortuneofthebraveCaptainCandide。\"
Whiletheoldwomanwasthusharanguing，withalltheprudencethatoldageandexperiencefurnish，asmallbarkenteredtheharbor，inwhichwasanalcaydeandhisalguazils。Mattershadfallenoutasfollows。
TheoldwomanrightlyguessedthattheFranciscanwiththelongsleeves，wasthepersonwhohadtakenMissCunegonde’smoneyandjewels，whiletheyandCandidewereatBadajoz，intheirflightfromLisbon。Thissamefriarattemptedtosellsomeofthediamondstoajeweler，whopresentlyknewthemtohavebelongedtotheGrandInquisitor，andstoppedthem。TheFranciscan，beforehewashanged，acknowledgedthathehadstolenthemanddescribedthepersons，andtheroadtheyhadtaken。
TheflightofCunegondeandCandidewasalreadythetowntalk。TheysentinpursuitofthemtoCadiz;andthevesselwhichhadbeensenttomakethegreaterdispatch，hadnowreachedtheportofBuenosAyres。A
reportwasspreadthatanalcaydewasgoingtoland，andthathewasinpursuitofthemurderersofMyLord，theInquisitor。Thesageoldwomanimmediatelysawwhatwastobedone。
\"Youcannotrunaway\"，saidshetoCunegonde，\"butyouhavenothingtofear;itwasnotyouwhokilledMyLordInquisitor：besides，astheGovernorisinlovewithyou，hewillnotsufferyoutobeill-treated;
thereforestandyourground。\"
ThenhurryingawaytoCandide，shesaid，\"Begonehencethisinstant，oryouwillbeburnedalive。\"
Candidefoundtherewasnotimetobelost;buthowcouldhepartfromCunegonde，andwhithermustheflyforshelter？
chapter14CHAPTERXIV
THERECEPTIONCANDIDEANDCACAMBOMETWITH
AMONGTHEJESUITSINPARAGUAY
CandidehadbroughtwithhimfromCadizsuchafootmanasoneoftenmeetswithonthecoastsofSpainandinthecolonies。
HewasthefourthpartofaSpaniard，ofamongrelbreed，andborninTucuman。
Hehadsuccessivelygonethroughtheprofessionofasingingboy，sexton，sailor，monk，peddler，soldier，andlackey。HisnamewasCacambo;
hehadagreataffectionforhismaster，becausehismasterwasaverygoodman。HeimmediatelysaddledthetwoAndalusianhorses。
\"Come，mygoodmaster，letusfollowtheoldwoman’sadvice，andmakeallthehastewecanfromthisplacewithoutstayingtolookbehindus。\"
Candideburstintoafloodoftears，\"OmydearCunegonde，mustIthenbecompelledtoquityoujustastheGovernorwasgoingtohonoruswithhispresenceatourwedding！Cunegonde，solonglostandfoundagain，whatwillnowbecomeofyou？\"
\"Lord！\"saidCacambo，’shemustdoaswellasshecan;
womenareneverataloss。Godtakescareofthem，andsoletusmakethebestofourway。\"
\"Butwhitherwiltthoucarryme？wherecanwego？whatcanwedowithoutCunegonde？\"criedthedisconsolateCandide。
\"BySt。JamesofCompostella\"，saidCacambo，\"youweregoingtofightagainsttheJesuitsofParaguay;nowletusgoandfightforthem;Iknowtheroadperfectlywell;I’llconductyoutotheirkingdom;
theywillbedelightedwithacaptainthatunderstandstheBulgariandrill;youwillcertainlymakeaprodigiousfortune。Ifwecannotsucceedinthisworldwemayinanother。Itisagreatpleasuretoseenewobjectsandperformnewexploits。\"
\"ThenyouhavebeeninParaguay？\"askedCandide。
\"Ay，marry，Ihave\"，repliedCacambo。\"IwasascoutintheCollegeoftheAssumption，andamaswellacquaintedwiththenewgovernmentoftheLosPadresasIamwiththestreetsofCadiz。Oh，itisanadmirablegovernment，thatismostcertain！Thekingdomisatpresentupwardsofthreehundredleaguesindiameter，anddividedintothirtyprovinces;
thefatherstherearemastersofeverything，andthepeoplehavenomoneyatall;thisyoumustallowisthemasterpieceofjusticeandreason。Formypart，Iseenothingsodivineasthegoodfathers，whowagewarinthispartoftheworldagainstthetroopsofSpainandPortugal，atthesametimethattheyheartheconfessionsofthoseveryprincesinEurope;whokillSpaniardsinAmericaandsendthemtoHeavenatMadrid。Thispleasesmeexceedingly，butletuspushforward;youaregoingtoseethehappiestandmostfortunateofallmortals。HowcharmedwillthosefathersbetohearthatacaptainwhounderstandstheBulgarianmilitarydrilliscomingtothem。\"
Assoonastheyreachedthefirstbarrier，Cacambocalledtotheadvanceguard，andtoldthemthatacaptainwantedtospeaktoMyLord，theGeneral。Noticewasgiventothemainguard，andimmediatelyaParaguayanofficerrantothrowhimselfatthefeetoftheCommandanttoimpartthisnewstohim。CandideandCacambowereimmediatelydisarmed，andtheirtwoAndalusianhorseswereseized。Thetwostrangerswereconductedbetweentwofilesofmusketeers，theCommandantwasatthefurtherendwithathree-corneredcaponhishead，hisgowntuckedup，aswordbyhisside，andahalf-pikeinhishand;hemadeasign，andinstantlyfourandtwentysoldiersdrewuproundthenewcomers。
Asergeanttoldthemthattheymustwait，theCommandantcouldnotspeaktothem;andthattheReverendFatherProvincialdidnotsufferanySpaniardtoopenhismouthbutinhispresence，ortostayabovethreehoursintheprovince。
\"AndwhereistheReverendFatherProvincial？\"saidCacambo。
\"HehasjustcomefromMassandisattheparade\"，repliedthesergeant，\"andinaboutthreehours’timeyoumaypossiblyhavethehonortokisshisspurs。\"
\"But\"，saidCacambo，\"theCaptain，who，aswellasmyself，isperishingofhunger，isnoSpaniard，butaGerman;therefore，pray，mightwenotbepermittedtobreakourfasttillwecanbeintroducedtoHisReverence？\"
ThesergeantimmediatelywentandacquaintedtheCommandantwithwhatheheard。
\"Godbepraised\"，saidtheReverendCommandant，\"sinceheisaGermanI
willhearwhathehastosay;lethimbebroughttomyarbor。\"
ImmediatelytheyconductedCandidetoabeautifulpavilionadomedwithacolonnadeofgreenmarble，spottedwithyellow，andwithanintertextureofvines，whichservedasakindofcageforparrots，hummingbirds，guineahens，andallothercuriouskindsofbirds。Anexcellentbreakfastwasprovidedinvesselsofgold;andwhiletheParaguayanswereeatingcoarseIndiancornoutofwoodendishesintheopenair，andexposedtotheburningheatofthesun，theReverendFatherCommandantretiredtohiscoolarbor。
Hewasaveryhandsomeyoungman，round-faced，fair，andfresh-colored，hiseyebrowswerefinelyarched，hehadapiercingeye，thetipsofhisearswerered，hislipsvermilion，andhehadaboldandcommandingair;butsuchaboldnessasneitherresembledthatofaSpaniardnorofaJesuit。HeorderedCandideandCacambotohavetheirarmsrestoredtothem，togetherwiththeirtwoAndalusianhorses。Cacambogavethepoorbeastssomeoatstoeatclosebythearbor，keepingastricteyeuponthemallthewhileforfearofsurprise。
CandidehavingkissedthehemoftheCommandant’srobe，theysatdowntotable。
\"ItseemsyouareaGerman\"，saidtheJesuittohiminthatlanguage。
\"Yes，ReverendFather\"，answeredCandide。
Astheypronouncedthesewordstheylookedateachotherwithgreatamazementandwithanemotionthatneithercouldconceal。
\"FromwhatpartofGermanydoyoucome？\"saidtheJesuit。
\"FromthedirtyprovinceofWestphalia\"，answeredCandide。
\"IwasborninthecastleofThunder-ten-tronckh。\"
\"Ohheavens！isitpossible？\"saidtheCommandant。
\"Whatamiracle！\"criedCandide。
\"Canitbeyou？\"saidtheCommandant。
Onthistheybothdrewafewstepsbackwards，thenrunningintoeachother’sarms，embraced，andweptprofusely。
\"Isityouthen，ReverendFather？YouarethebrotherofthefairMissCunegonde？YouthatwasslainbytheBulgarians！YoutheBaron’sson！
YouaJesuitinParaguay！Imustconfessthisisastrangeworldwelivein。
OPangloss！whatjoywouldthishavegivenyouifyouhadnotbeenhanged。\"
TheCommandantdismissedtheNegroslaves，andtheParaguayanswhopresentedthemwithliquorincrystalgoblets。HereturnedthankstoGodandSt。Ignatiusathousandtimes;heclaspedCandideinhisarms，andboththeirfaceswerebathedintears。
\"Youwillbemoresurprised，moreaffected，moretransported\"，saidCandide，\"whenItellyouthatMissCunegonde，yoursister，whosebellywassupposedtohavebeenrippedopen，isinperfecthealth。\"
\"Inyourneighborhood，withtheGovernorofBuenosAyres;
andImyselfwasgoingtofightagainstyou。\"
Everywordtheyutteredduringthislongconversationwasproductiveofsomenewmatterofastonishment。Theirsoulsflutteredontheirtongues，listenedintheirears，andsparkledintheireyes。LiketrueGermans，theycontinuedalongwhileattable，waitingfortheReverendFather;andtheCommandantspoketohisdearCandideasfollows。
chapter15CHAPTERXV
HOWCANDIDEKILLEDTHEBROTHEROFHISDEAR
CUNEGONDE
NeverwhileIliveshallIlosetheremembranceofthathorribledayonwhichIsawmyfatherandmotherbarbarouslybutcheredbeforemyeyes，andmysisterravished。WhentheBulgariansretiredwesearchedinvainformydearsister。Shewasnowheretobefound;butthebodiesofmyfather，mother，andmyself，withtwoservantmaidsandthreelittleboys，allofwhomhadbeenmurderedbytheremorselessenemy，werethrownintoacarttobeburiedinachapelbelongingtotheJesuits，withintwoleaguesofourfamilyseat。AJesuitsprinkleduswithsomeholywater，whichwasconfoundedsalty，andafewdropsofitwentintomyeyes;
thefatherperceivedthatmyeyelidsstirredalittle;heputhishanduponmybreastandfeltmyheartbeat;uponwhichhegavemeproperassistance，andattheendofthreeweeksIwasperfectlyrecovered。Youknow，mydearCandide，Iwasveryhandsome;Ibecamestillmoreso，andtheReverendFatherCroust，superiorofthathouse，tookagreatfancytome;hegavemethehabitoftheorder，andsomeyearsafterwardsIwassenttoRome。OurGeneralstoodinneedofnewrecruitsofyoungGermanJesuits。ThesovereignsofParaguayadmitofasfewSpanishJesuitsaspossible;theypreferthoseofothernations，asbeingmoreobedienttocommand。TheReverendFatherGenerallookeduponmeasaproperpersontoworkinthatvineyard。IsetoutincompanywithaPolanderandaTyrolese。
UponmyarrivalIwashonoredwithasubdeaconshipandalieutenancy。
NowIamcolonelandpriest。WeshallgiveawarmreceptiontotheKingofSpain’stroops;Icanassureyoutheywillbewellexcommunicatedandbeaten。
Providencehassentyouhithertoassistus。ButisittruethatmydearsisterCunegondeisintheneighborhoodwiththeGovernorofBuenosAyres？\"
Candidesworethatnothingcouldbemoretrue;andthetearsbeganagaintotrickledowntheircheeks。TheBaronknewnoendofembracingCandide，becalledhimhisbrother，hisdeliverer。
\"Perhaps\"，saidhe，\"mydearCandide，weshallbefortunateenoughtoenterthetown，swordinhand，andrecovermysisterCunegonde。\"
\"Ah！thatwouldcrownmywishes\"，repliedCandide;\"forIintendedtomarryher;andIhopeIshallstillbeabletoeffectit。\"
\"Insolentfellow！\"criedtheBaron。\"You！youhavetheimpudencetomarrymysister，whobearsseventy-twoquarterings！Really，Ithinkyouhaveaninsufferabledegreeofassurancetodaresomuchastomentionsuchanaudaciousdesigntome。\"
Candide，thunderstruckattheoddnessofthisspeech，answered：
\"ReverendFather，allthequarteringsintheworldareofnosignification。I
havedeliveredyoursisterfromaJewandanInquisitor;
sheisundermanyobligationstome，andsheisresolvedtogivemeherhand。Mymaster，Pangloss，alwaystoldmethatmankindarebynatureequal。
Therefore，youmaydependuponitthatIwillmarryyoursister。\"
\"Weshallseetothat，villain！\"saidtheJesuit，BaronofThunder-ten-tronckh，andstruckhimacrossthefacewiththeflatsideofhissword。CandideinaninstantdrewhisrapierandplungedituptothehiltintheJesuit’sbody;butinpullingitoutreekinghot，heburstintotears。
\"GoodGod！\"criedhe，\"Ihavekilledmyoldmaster，myfriend，mybrother-in-law。Iamthebestmanintheworld，andyetIhavealreadykilledthreemen，andofthesethree，twowerepriests。\"
Cacambo，whowasstandingsentrynearthedoorofthearbor，instantlyranup。
\"Nothingremains\"，saidhismaster，\"buttosellourlivesasdearlyaspossible;theywillundoubtedlylookintothearbor;wemustdieswordinhand。\"
Cacambo，whohadseenmanyofthiskindofadventures，wasnotdiscouraged。HestrippedtheBaronofhisJesuit’shabitandputituponCandide，thengavehimthedeadman’sthree-corneredcapandmadehimmountonhorseback。Allthiswasdoneasquickasthought。
\"Gallop，master\"，criedCacambo;\"everybodywilltakeyouforaJesuitgoingtogiveorders;andweshallhavepassedthefrontiersbeforetheywillbeabletoovertakeus。\"
Heflewashespokethesewords，cryingoutaloudinSpanish，\"Makeway;
makewayfortheReverendFatherColonel。\"
chapter16CHAPTERXVI
WHATHAPPENEDTOOURTWOTRAVELERSWITH
TWOGIRLS，TWOMONKEYS，ANDTHESAVAGES，CALLEDOREILLONS
CandideandhisvalethadalreadypassedthefrontiersbeforeitwasknownthattheGermanJesuitwasdead。ThewaryCacambohadtakencaretofillhiswalletwithbread，chocolate，someham，somefruit，andafewbottlesofwine。TheypenetratedwiththeirAndalusianhorsesintoastrangecountry，wheretheycoulddiscovernobeatenpath。Atlengthabeautifulmeadow，intersectedwithpurlingrills，openedtotheirview。
Cacamboproposedtohismastertotakesomenourishment，andhesethimanexample。
\"Howcanyoudesiremetofeastuponham，whenIhavekilledtheBaron’ssonandamdoomednevermoretoseethebeautifulCunegonde？
Whatwillitavailmetoprolongawretchedlifethatmustbespentfarfromherinremorseanddespair？AndthenwhatwillthejournalofTrevouxsay？\"wasCandide’sreply。
Whilehewasmakingthesereflectionshestillcontinuedeating。Thesunwasnowonthepointofsettingwhentheearsofourtwowandererswereassailedwithcrieswhichseemedtobeutteredbyafemalevoice。Theycouldnottellwhetherthesewerecriesofgrieforofjoy;however，theyinstantlystartedup，fullofthatinquietudeandapprehensionwhichastrangeplacenaturallyinspires。Thecriesproceededfromtwoyoungwomenwhoweretrippingdisrobedalongthemead，whiletwomonkeysfollowedcloseattheirheelsbitingattheirlimbs。Candidewastouchedwithcompassion;hehadlearnedtoshootwhilehewasamongtheBulgarians，andhecouldhitafilbertinahedgewithouttouchingaleaf。Accordinglyhetookuphisdouble-barrelledSpanishgun，pulledthetrigger，andlaidthetwomonkeyslifelessontheground。
\"Godbepraised，mydearCacambo，Ihaverescuedtwopoorgirlsfromamostperiloussituation;ifIhavecommittedasininkillinganInquisitorandaJesuit，Ihavemadeampleamendsbysavingthelivesofthesetwodistresseddamsels。Whoknowsbuttheymaybeyoungladiesofagoodfamily，andthattheassistanceIhavebeensohappytogivethemmayprocureusgreatadvantageinthiscountry？\"
Hewasabouttocontinuewhenhefelthimselfstruckspeechlessatseeingthetwogirlsembracingthedeadbodiesofthemonkeysinthetenderestmanner，bathingtheirwoundswiththeirtears，andrendingtheairwiththemostdolefullamentations。
\"Really\"，saidhetoCacambo，\"Ishouldnothaveexpectedtoseesuchaprodigiousshareofgoodnature。\"
\"Master\"，repliedtheknowingvalet，\"youhavemadeapreciouspieceofworkofit;doyouknowthatyouhavekilledtheloversofthesetwoladies？\"
\"Theirlovers！Cacambo，youarejesting！Itcannotbe！
Icanneverbelieveit。\"
\"Dearsir\"，repliedCacambo，\"youaresurprisedateverything。
Whyshouldyouthinkitsostrangethatthereshouldbeacountrywheremonkeysinsinuatethemselvesintothegoodgracesoftheladies？
TheyarethefourthpartofamanasIamthefourthpartofaSpaniard。\"
\"Alas！\"repliedCandide，\"IremembertohaveheardmymasterPanglosssaythatsuchaccidentsasthesefrequentlycametopassinformertimes，andthatthesecommixturesareproductiveofcentaurs，fauns，andsatyrs;
andthatmanyoftheancientshadseensuchmonsters;
butIlookeduponthewholeasfabulous。\"
\"Nowyouareconvinced\"，saidCacambo，\"thatitisverytrue，andyouseewhatuseismadeofthosecreaturesbypersonswhohavenothadapropereducation;allIamafraidofisthatthesesameladiesmayplayussomeuglytrick。\"
ThesejudiciousreflectionsoperatedsofaronCandideastomakehimquitthemeadowandstrikeintoathicket。ThereheandCacambosupped，andafterheartilycursingtheGrandInquisitor，theGovernorofBuenosAyres，andtheBaron，theyfellasleepontheground。Whentheyawoketheyweresurprisedtofindthattheycouldnotmove;thereasonwasthattheOreillonswhoinhabitthatcountry，andtowhomtheladieshadgiveninformationofthesetwostrangers，hadboundthemwithcordsmadeofthebarkoftrees。
TheysawthemselvessurroundedbyfiftynakedOreillonsarmedwithbowsandarrows，clubs，andhatchetsofflint;someweremakingafireunderalargecauldron;andotherswerepreparingspits，cryingoutoneandall，\"A
Jesuit！aJesuit！weshallberevenged;weshallhaveexcellentcheer;letuseatthisJesuit;letuseathimup。\"
\"Itoldyou，master\"，criedCacambo，mournfully，\"thatthesetwowencheswouldplayussomescurvytrick。\"
Candide，seeingthecauldronandthespits，criedout，\"Isupposetheyaregoingeithertoboilorroastus。Ah！whatwouldPanglosssayifheweretoseehowpurenatureisformed？Everythingisright;itmaybeso;butImustconfessitissomethinghardtobebereftofdearMissCunegonde，andtobespittedlikearabbitbythesebarbarousOreillons。\"
Cacambo，whoneverlosthispresenceofmindindistress，saidtothedisconsolateCandide，\"Donotdespair;Iunderstandalittleofthejargonofthesepeople;Iwillspeaktothem。\"
\"Ay，praydo\"，saidCandide，\"andbesureyoumakethemsensibleofthehorridbarbarityofboilingandroastinghumancreatures，andhowlittleofChristianitythereisinsuchpractices。\"
\"Gentlemen\"，saidCacambo，\"youthinkperhapsyouaregoingtofeastuponaJesuit;ifso，itismightywell;nothingcanbemoreagreeabletojusticethanthustotreatyourenemies。Indeedthelawofnatureteachesustokillourneighbor，andaccordinglywefindthispracticedallovertheworld;
andifwedonotindulgeourselvesineatinghumanflesh，itisbecausewehavemuchbetterfare;butforyourparts，whohavenotsuchresourcesaswe，itiscertainlymuchbetterjudgedtofeastuponyourenemiesthantothrowtheirbodiestothefowlsoftheair;andthusloseallthefruitsofyourvictory。
\"Butsurely，gentlemen，youwouldnotchoosetoeatyourfriends。YouimagineyouaregoingtoroastaJesuit，whereasmymasterisyourfriend，yourdefender，andyouaregoingtospittheverymanwhohasbeendestroyingyourenemies;astomyself，Iamyourcountryman;
thisgentlemanismymaster，andsofarfrombeingaJesuit，givemeleavetotellyouhehasverylatelykilledoneofthatorder，whosespoilshenowwears，andwhichhaveprobablyoccasionedyourmistake。ToconvinceyouofthetruthofwhatIsay，takethehabithehasonandcarryittothefirstbarrieroftheJesuits’kingdom，andinquirewhethermymasterdidnotkilloneoftheirofficers。Therewillbelittleornotimelostbythis，andyoumaystillreserveourbodiesinyourpowertofeastonifyoushouldfindwhatwehavetoldyoutobefalse。But，onthecontrary，ifyoufindittobetrue，Iampersuadedyouaretoowellacquaintedwiththeprinciplesofthelawsofsociety，humanity，andjustice，nottouseuscourteously，andsufferustodepartunhurt。\"
ThisspeechappearedveryreasonabletotheOreillons;
theydeputedtwooftheirpeoplewithallexpeditiontoinquireintothetruthofthisaffair，whoacquittedthemselvesoftheircommissionlikemenofsense，andsoonreturnedwithgoodtidingsforourdistressedadventurers。
Uponthistheywereloosed，andthosewhoweresolatelygoingtoroastandboilthemnowshowedthemallsortsofcivilities，offeredthemgirls，gavethemrefreshments，andreconductedthemtotheconfinesoftheircountry，cryingbeforethemalltheway，intokenofjoy，\"HeisnoJesuit！
heisnoJesuit！\"
Candidecouldnothelpadmiringthecauseofhisdeliverance。
\"Whatmen！
whatmanners！\"criedhe。\"IfIhadnotfortunatelyrunmysworduptothehiltinthebodyofMissCunegonde’sbrother，Ishouldhavecertainlybeeneatenalive。But，afterall，purenatureisanexcellentthing;sincethesepeople，insteadofeatingme，showedmeathousandcivilitiesassoonastheyknewwasnotaJesuit。\"
chapter17CHAPTERXVII
CANDIDEANDHISVALETARRIVEINTHECOUNTRYOF
ELDORADO。WHATTHEYSAWHERE
WhentothefrontiersoftheOreillons，saidCacambotoCandide，\"Yousee，thishemisphereisnotbetterthantheother;nowtakemyadviceandletusreturntoEuropebytheshortestwaypossible。\"
\"Buthowcanwegetback？\"saidCandide;\"andwhithershallwego？Tomyowncountry？TheBulgariansandtheAbaresarelayingthatwastewithfireandsword。OrshallwegotoPortugal？ThereIshallbeburned;andifweabidehereweareeverymomentindangerofbeingspitted。
ButhowcanI
bringmyselftoquitthatpartoftheworldwheremydearMissCunegondehasherresidence？\"
\"LetusreturntowardsCayenne\"，saidCacambo。\"ThereweshallmeetwithsomeFrenchmen，foryouknowthosegentryrambleallovertheworld。
Perhapstheywillassistus，andGodwilllookwithpityonourdistress。\"
ItwasnotsoeasytogettoCayenne。Theyknewprettynearlywhereaboutsitlay;butthemountains，rivers，precipices，robbers，savages，weredreadfulobstaclesintheway。Theirhorsesdiedwithfatigueandtheirprovisionswereatanend。Theysubsistedawholemonthonwildfruit，tillatlengththeycametoalittleriverborderedwithcocoatrees;thesightofwhichatoncerevivedtheirdroopingspiritsandfurnishednourishmentfortheirenfeebledbodies。
Cacambo，whowasalwaysgivingasgoodadviceastheoldwomanherself，saidtoCandide，\"Youseethereisnoholdingoutanylonger;wehavetraveledenoughonfoot。Ispyanemptycanoeneartheriverside;letusfillitwithcocoanuts，getintoit，andgodownwiththestream;
ariveralwaysleadstosomeinhabitedplace。Ifwedonotmeetwithagreeablethings，weshallatleastmeetwithsomethingnew。\"
\"Agreed\"，repliedCandide;\"letusrecommendourselvestoProvidence。\"
Theyrowedafewleaguesdowntheriver，thebanksofwhichwereinsomeplacescoveredwithflowers;inothersbarren;insomepartssmoothandlevel，andinotherssteepandrugged。Thestreamwidenedastheywentfurtheron，tillatlengthitpassedunderoneofthefrightfulrocks，whosesummitsseemedtoreachtheclouds。Hereourtwotravelershadthecouragetocommitthemselvestothestream，which，contractinginthispart，hurriedthemalongwithadreadfulnoiseandrapidity。
Attheendoffourandtwentyhourstheysawdaylightagain;
buttheircanoewasdashedtopiecesagainsttherocks。Theywereobligedtocreepalong，fromrocktorock，forthespaceofaleague，tillatlengthaspaciousplainpresenteditselftotheirsight。Thisplacewasboundedbyachainofinaccessiblemountains。Thecountryappearedcultivatedequallyforpleasureandtoproducethenecessariesoflife。Theusefulandagreeablewerehereequallyblended。Theroadswerecovered，orratheradorned，withcarriagesformedofglitteringmaterials，inwhichweremenandwomenofasurprisingbeauty，drawnwithgreatrapiditybyredsheepofaverylargesize;whichfarsurpassedthefinestcoursersofAndalusianTetuan，orMecquinez。
\"Hereisacountry，however\"，saidCandide，\"preferabletoWestphalia。\"
HeandCacambolandednearthefirstvillagetheysaw，attheentranceofwhichtheyperceivedsomechildrencoveredwithtatteredgarmentsoftherichestbrocade，playingatquoits。Ourtwoinhabitantsoftheotherhemisphereamusedthemselvesgreatlywithwhattheysaw。
Thequoitswerelarge，roundpieces，yellow，red，andgreen，whichcastamostgloriousluster。Ourtravelerspickedsomeofthemup，andtheyprovedtobegold，emeralds，rubies，anddiamonds;theleastofwhichwouldhavebeenthegreatestornamenttothesuperbthroneoftheGreatMogul。
\"Withoutdoubt\"，saidCacambo，\"thosechildrenmustbetheKing’ssonsthatareplayingatquoits。\"
Ashewasutteringthesewordstheschoolmasterofthevillageappeared，whocametocallthechildrentoschool。
\"There\"，saidCandide，\"isthepreceptoroftheroyalfamily。\"
Thelittleragamuffinsimmediatelyquittedtheirdiversion，leavingthequoitsonthegroundwithalltheirotherplaythings。Candidegatheredthemup，rantotheschoolmaster，and，withamostrespectfulbow，presentedthemtohim，givinghimtounderstandbysignsthattheirRoyalHighnesseshadforgottheirgoldandpreciousstones。Theschoolmaster，withasmile，flungthemupontheground，thenexaminingCandidefromheadtofootwithanairofadmiration，heturnedhisbackandwentonhisway。
Ourtravelerstookcare，however，togatherupthegold，therubies，andtheemeralds。
\"Wherearewe？\"criedCandide。\"TheKing’schildreninthiscountrymusthaveanexcellenteducation，sincetheyaretaughttoshowsuchacontemptforgoldandpreciousstones。\"
Cacambowasasmuchsurprisedashismaster。Theythendrewnearthefirsthouseinthevillage，whichwasbuiltafterthemannerofaEuropeanpalace。Therewasacrowdofpeopleaboutthedoor，andastillgreaternumberinthehouse。Thesoundofthemostdelightfulinstrumentsofmusicwasheard，andthemostagreeablesmellcamefromthekitchen。CacambowentuptothedoorandheardthosewithintalkinginthePeruvianlanguage，whichwashismothertongue;foreveryoneknowsthatCacambowasborninavillageofTucuman，wherenootherlanguageisspoken。
\"Iwillbeyourinterpreterhere\"，saidhetoCandide。
\"Letusgoin;thisisaneatinghouse。\"
Immediatelytwowaitersandtwoservant-girls，dressedinclothofgold，andtheirhairbraidedwithribbonsoftissue，accostedthestrangersandinvitedthemtositdowntotheordinary。Theirdinnerconsistedoffourdishesofdifferentsoups，eachgarnishedwithtwoyoungparoquets，alargedishofbouillethatweighedtwohundredweight，tworoastedmonkeysofadeliciousflavor，threehundredhummingbirdsinonedish，andsixhundredflybirdsinanother;someexcellentragouts，delicatetarts，andthewholeservedupindishesofrock-crystal。Severalsortsofliquors，extractedfromthesugarcane，werehandedaboutbytheservantswhoattended。
Mostofthecompanywerechapmenandwagoners，allextremelypolite;
theyaskedCacamboafewquestionswiththeutmostdiscretionandcircumspection;andrepliedtohisinamostobligingandsatisfactorymanner。
Assoonasdinnerwasover，bothCandideandCacambothoughttheyshouldpayveryhandsomelyfortheirentertainmentbylayingdowntwoofthoselargegoldpieceswhichtheyhadpickedofftheground;butthelandlordandlandladyburstintoafitoflaughingandheldtheirsidesforsometime。
Whenthefitwasover，thelandlordsaid，\"Gentlemen，I
plainlyperceiveyouarestrangers，andsuchwearenotaccustomedtocharge;
pardonus，therefore，forlaughingwhenyouofferedusthecommonpebblesofourhighwaysforpaymentofyourreckoning。Tobesure，youhavenoneofthecoinofthiskingdom;butthereisnonecessityofhavinganymoneyatalltodineinthishouse。Alltheinns，whichareestablishedfortheconvenienceofthosewhocarryonthetradeofthisnation，aremaintainedbythegovernment。Youhavefoundbutveryindifferententertainmenthere，becausethisisonlyapoorvillage;butinalmosteveryotherofthesepublichousesyouwillmeetwithareceptionworthyofpersonsofyourmerit。\"
CacamboexplainedthewholeofthisspeechofthelandlordtoCandide，wholistenedtoitwiththesameastonishmentwithwhichhisfriendcommunicatedit。
\"Whatsortofacountryisthis\"，saidtheonetotheother，\"thatisunknowntoalltheworld;andinwhichNaturehaseverywheresodifferentanappearancetowhatshehasinours？Possiblythisisthatpartoftheglobewhereeverywhereisright，fortheremustcertainlybesomesuchplace。
And，forallthatMasterPanglosscouldsay，IoftenperceivedthatthingswentveryillinWestphalia。\"
chapter18CHAPTERXVIII
WHATTHEYSAWINTHECOUNTRYOFELDORADO
Cacamboventedallhiscuriosityuponhislandlordbyathousanddifferentquestions;thehonestmanansweredhimthus，\"Iamveryignorant，sir，butI
amcontentedwithmyignorance;however，wehaveinthisneighborhoodanoldmanretiredfromcourt，whoisthemostlearnedandcommunicativepersoninthewholekingdom。\"
HethenconductedCacambototheoldman;Candideactednowonlyasecondcharacter，andattendedhisvalet。Theyenteredaveryplainhouse，forthedoorwasnothingbutsilver，andtheceilingwasonlyofbeatengold，butwroughtinsucheleganttasteastoviewiththerichest。
Theantechamber，indeed，wasonlyincrustedwithrubiesandemeralds;buttheorderinwhicheverythingwasdisposedmadeamendsforthisgreatsimplicity。
Theoldmanreceivedthestrangersonhissofa，whichwasstuffedwithhummingbirds’feathers;andorderedhisservantstopresentthemwithliquorsingoldengoblets，afterwhichhesatisfiedtheircuriosityinthefollowingterms。
\"Iamnowonehundredandseventy-twoyearsold，andI
learnedofmylatefather，whowasequerrytotheKing，theamazingrevolutionsofPeru，towhichhehadbeenaneyewitness。ThiskingdomistheancientpatrimonyoftheIncas，whoveryimprudentlyquittedittoconqueranotherpartoftheworld，andwereatlengthconqueredanddestroyedthemselvesbytheSpaniards。
\"Thoseprincesoftheirfamilywhoremainedintheirnativecountryactedmorewisely。Theyordained，withtheconsentoftheirwholenation，thatnoneoftheinhabitantsofourlittlekingdomshouldeverquitit;andtothiswiseordinanceweowethepreservationofourinnocenceandhappiness。
TheSpaniardshadsomeconfusednotionofthiscountry，towhichtheygavethenameofElDorado;andSirWalterRaleigh，anEnglishman，actuallycameverynearitaboutthreehundredyearsago;
buttheinaccessiblerocksandprecipiceswithwhichourcountryissurroundedonallsides，hashithertosecuredusfromtherapaciousfuryofthepeopleofEurope，whohaveanunaccountablefondnessforthepebblesanddirtofourland，forthesakeofwhichtheywouldmurderusalltotheverylastman。\"
Theconversationlastedsometimeandturnedchieflyontheformofgovernment，theirmanners，theirwomen，theirpublicdiversions，andthearts。Atlength，Candide，whohadalwayshadatasteformetaphysics，askedwhetherthepeopleofthatcountryhadanyreligion。
Theoldmanreddenedalittleatthisquestion。
\"Canyoudoubtit？\"saidhe;\"doyoutakeusforwretcheslosttoallsenseofgratitude？\"
CacamboaskedinarespectfulmannerwhatwastheestablishedreligionofElDorado。Theoldmanblushedagainandsaid，\"Cantherebetworeligions，then？Ours，Iapprehend，isthereligionofthewholeworld;weworshipGodfrommorningtillnight。\"
\"DoyouworshipbutoneGod？\"saidCacambo，whostillactedastheinterpreterofCandide’sdoubts。
\"Certainly\"，saidtheoldman;\"therearenottwo，northree，norfourGods。I
mustconfessthepeopleofyourworldaskveryextraordinaryquestions。\"
However，Candidecouldnotrefrainfrommakingmanymoreinquiriesoftheoldman;hewantedtoknowinwhatmannertheyprayedtoGodinElDorado。
\"WedonotpraytoHimatall\"，saidthereverendsage;
\"wehavenothingtoaskofHim，Hehasgivenusallwewant，andwegiveHimthanksincessantly。\"
Candidehadacuriositytoseesomeoftheirpriests，anddesiredCacambotoasktheoldmanwheretheywere。Atwhichhesmilingsaid，\"Myfriends，weareallofuspriests;theKingandalltheheadsoffamiliessingsolemnhymnsofthanksgivingeverymorning，accompaniedbyfiveorsixthousandmusicians。\"
\"What！\"saidCacambo，\"haveyounomonksamongyoutodispute，togovern，tointrigue，andtoburnpeoplewhoarenotofthesameopinionwiththemselves？\"
\"Doyoutakeusforfools？\"saidtheoldman。\"Hereweareallofoneopinion，andknownotwhatyoumeanbyyourmonks。\"
DuringthewholeofthisdiscourseCandidewasinraptures，andhesaidtohimself，\"WhataprodigiousdifferenceistherebetweenthisplaceandWestphalia;andthishouseandtheBaron’scastle。Ah，MasterPangloss！
hadyoueverseenElDorado，youwouldnolongerhavemaintainedthatthecastleofThunder-ten-tronckhwasthefinestofallpossibleedifices;thereisnothinglikeseeingtheworld，that’scertain。\"
Thislongconversationbeingended，theoldmanorderedsixsheeptobeharnessedandputtothecoach，andsenttwelveofhisservantstoescortthetravelerstocourt。
\"Excuseme\"，saidhe，\"fornotwaitingonyouinperson，myagedeprivesmeofthathonor。TheKingwillreceiveyouinsuchamannerthatyouwillhavenoreasontocomplain;anddoubtlessyouwillmakeaproperallowanceforthecustomsofthecountryiftheyshouldnothappenaltogethertopleaseyou。\"
CandideandCacambogotintothecoach，thesixsheepflew，and，inlessthanaquarterofanhour，theyarrivedattheKing’spalace，whichwassituatedatthefurtherendofthecapital。Attheentrancewasaportaltwohundredandtwentyfeethighandonehundredwide;butitisimpossibleforwordstoexpressthematerialsofwhichitwasbuilt。