第12章
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  E。g。,“Ouryoungpeoplearediseasedwiththetheologicalproblemsoforiginalsin,originofevil,predestination,andthelike。Theseneverpresentedapracticaldifficultytoanyman——neverdarkenedacrossanyman’sroad,whodidnotgooutofhiswaytoseekthem。Thesearethesoul’smumps,andmeasles,andwhooping-coughs,etc。Emerson:SpiritualLaws。

  Thepsychologicalbasisofthetwice-borncharacterseemstobeacertaindiscordancyorheterogeneityinthenativetemperamentofthesubject,anincompletelyunifiedmoralandintellectualconstitution。

  “Homoduplex,homoduplex!”writesAlphonseDaudet。“ThefirsttimethatIperceivedthatIwastwowasatthedeathofmybrotherHenri,whenmyfathercriedoutsodramatically,’Heisdead,heisdead!’Whilemyfirstselfwept,mysecondselfthought,’Howtrulygivenwasthatcry,howfineitwouldbeatthetheatre。’Iwasthenfourteenyearsold。

  “Thishorribledualityhasoftengivenmematterforreflection。

  Oh,thisterriblesecondme,alwaysseatedwhilsttheotherisonfoot,acting,living,suffering,bestirringitself。ThissecondmethatIhaveneverbeenabletointoxicate,tomakeshedtears,orputtosleep。Andhowitseesintothings,andhowitmocks!”[87]

  [87]NotessurlaVie,p。1。

  Recentworksonthepsychologyofcharacterhavehadmuchtosayuponthispoint。[88]Somepersonsarebornwithaninnerconstitutionwhichisharmoniousandwellbalancedfromtheoutset。Theirimpulsesareconsistentwithoneanother,theirwillfollowswithouttroubletheguidanceoftheirintellect,theirpassionsarenotexcessive,andtheirlivesarelittlehauntedbyregrets。Othersareoppositelyconstituted;andaresoindegreeswhichmayvaryfromsomethingsoslightastoresultinamerelyoddorwhimsicalinconsistency,toadiscordancyofwhichtheconsequencesmaybeinconvenientintheextreme。OfthemoreinnocentkindsofheterogeneityIfindagoodexampleinMrs。AnnieBesant’sautobiography。

  [88]See,forexample,F。Paulhan,inhisbookLesCaracteres,1894,whocontrastslesEquilibres,lesUnifies,withlesInquiets,lesContrariants,lesIncoherents,lesEmiettes,assomanydiversepsychictypes。

  “Ihaveeverbeenthequeerestmixtureofweaknessandstrength,andhavepaidheavilyfortheweakness。AsachildIusedtosuffertorturesofshyness,andifmyshoe-lacewasuntiedwouldfeelshamefacedlythateveryeyewasfixedontheunluckystring;

  asagirlIwouldshrinkawayfromstrangersandthinkmyselfunwantedandunliked,sothatIwasfullofeagergratitudetoanyonewhonoticedmekindly,astheyoungmistressofahouseI

  wasafraidofmyservants,andwouldletcarelessworkpassratherthanbearthepainofreprovingtheill-doer;whenIhavebeenlecturinganddebatingwithnolackofspiritontheplatform,IhavepreferredtogowithoutwhatIwantedatthehotelratherthantoringandmakethewaiterfetchit。

  CombativeontheplatformindefenseofanycauseIcaredfor,I

  shrinkfromquarrelordisapprovalinthehouse,andamacowardatheartinprivatewhileagoodfighterinpublic。HowoftenhaveIpassedunhappyquartersofanhourscrewingupmycouragetofindfaultwithsomesubordinatewhommydutycompelledmetoreprove,andhowoftenhaveIjeeredmyselfforafraudasthedoughtyplatformcombatant,whenshrinkingfromblamingsomeladorlassfordoingtheirworkbadly。Anunkindlookorwordhasavailedtomakemeshrinkintomyselfasasnailintoitsshell,while,ontheplatform,oppositionmakesmespeakmybest。”[89]

  [89]AnnieBesant:anAutobiography,p。82。

  Thisamountofinconsistencywillonlycountasamiableweakness;

  butastrongerdegreeofheterogeneitymaymakehavocofthesubject’slife。Therearepersonswhoseexistenceislittlemorethanaseriesofzig-zags,asnowonetendencyandnowanothergetstheupperhand。Theirspiritwarswiththeirflesh,theywishforincompatibles,waywardimpulsesinterrupttheirmostdeliberateplans,andtheirlivesareonelongdramaofrepentanceandofefforttorepairmisdemeanorsandmistakes。

  Heterogeneouspersonalityhasbeenexplainedastheresultofinheritance——thetraitsofcharacterofincompatibleandantagonisticancestorsaresupposedtobepreservedalongsideofeachother。[90]Thisexplanationmaypassforwhatitisworth——itcertainlyneedscorroboration。Butwhateverthecauseofheterogeneouspersonalitymaybe,wefindtheextremeexamplesofitinthepsychopathictemperament,ofwhichIspokeinmyfirstlecture。Allwritersaboutthattemperamentmaketheinnerheterogeneityprominentintheirdescriptions。Frequently,indeed,itisonlythistraitthatleadsustoascribethattemperamenttoamanatall。A“degeneresuperieur“issimplyamanofsensibilityinmanydirections,whofindsmoredifficultythaniscommoninkeepinghisspiritualhouseinorderandrunninghisfurrowstraight,becausehisfeelingsandimpulsesaretookeenandtoodiscrepantmutually。Inthehauntingandinsistentideas,intheirrationalimpulses,themorbidscruples,dreads,andinhibitionswhichbesetthepsychopathictemperamentwhenitisthoroughlypronounced,wehaveexquisiteexamplesofheterogeneouspersonality。Bunyanhadanobsessionofthewords,“SellChristforthis,sellhimforthat,sellhim,sellhim!”

  whichwouldrunthroughhismindahundredtimestogether,untilonedayoutofbreathwithretorting,“Iwillnot,Iwillnot。”

  heimpulsivelysaid,“Lethimgoifhewill。”andthislossofthebattlekepthimindespairforoverayear。Thelivesofthesaintsarefullofsuchblasphemousobsessions,ascribedinvariablytothedirectagencyofSatan。Thephenomenonconnectsitselfwiththelifeofthesubconsciousself,so-called,ofwhichwemusterelongspeakmoredirectly。

  [90]SmithBaker,inJournalofNervousandMentalDiseases,September,1893。

  Nowinallofus,howeverconstituted,buttoadegreethegreaterinproportionasweareintenseandsensitiveandsubjecttodiversifiedtemptations,andtothegreatestpossibledegreeifwearedecidedlypsychopathic,doesthenormalevolutionofcharacterchieflyconsistinthestraighteningoutandunifyingoftheinnerself。Thehigherandthelowerfeelings,theusefulandtheerringimpulses,beginbybeingacomparativechaoswithinus——theymustendbyformingastablesystemoffunctionsinrightsubordination。Unhappinessisapttocharacterizetheperiodoforder-makingandstruggle。Iftheindividualbeoftenderconscienceandreligiouslyquickened,theunhappinesswilltaketheformofmoralremorseandcompunction,offeelinginwardlyvileandwrong,andofstandinginfalserelationstotheauthorofone’sbeingandappointerofone’sspiritualfate。

  Thisisthereligiousmelancholyand“convictionofsin“thathaveplayedsolargeapartinthehistoryofProtestantChristianity。Theman’sinteriorisabattle-groundforwhathefeelstobetwodeadlyhostileselves,oneactual,theotherideal。AsVictorHugomakeshisMahometsay:——

  “Jesuislechampvildessublimescombats:

  Tantotl’hommed’enhaut,ettantotl’hommed’enbas;

  Etlemaldansmaboucheaveclebienalterne,Commedansledesertlesableetlaciterne。”

  Wrongliving,impotentaspirations;“WhatIwould,thatdoInot;

  butwhatIhate,thatdoI。”asSaintPaulsays;self-loathing,self-despair;anunintelligibleandintolerableburdentowhichoneismysteriouslytheheir。

  Letmequotefromsometypicalcasesofdiscordantpersonality,withmelancholyintheformofself-condemnationandsenseofsin。SaintAugustine’scaseisaclassicexample。Youallrememberhishalf-pagan,half-ChristianbringingupatCarthage,hisemigrationtoRomeandMilan,hisadoptionofManicheismandsubsequentskepticism,andhisrestlesssearchfortruthandpurityoflife;andfinallyhow,distractedbythestrugglebetweenthetwosoulsinhisbreastandashamedofhisownweaknessofwill,whensomanyotherswhomheknewandknewofhadthrownofftheshacklesofsensualityanddedicatedthemselvestochastityandthehigherlife,heheardavoiceinthegardensay,“Sume,lege“takeandread,andopeningtheBibleatrandom,sawthetext,“notinchamberingandwantonness。”etc。,whichseemeddirectlysenttohisaddress,andlaidtheinnerstormtorestforever。[91]Augustine’spsychologicalgeniushasgivenanaccountofthetroubleofhavingadividedselfwhichhasneverbeensurpassed。

  [91]LouisGourdonEssaisurlaConversiondeSaintAugustine,Paris,Fischbacher,1900hasshownbyananalysisofAugustine’swritingsimmediatelyafterthedateofhisconversionA。D。386

  thattheaccounthegivesintheConfessionsispremature。Thecrisisinthegardenmarkedadefinitiveconversionfromhisformerlife,butitwastotheneo-platonicspiritualismandonlyahalfwaystagetowardChristianity。Thelatterheappearsnotfullyandradicallytohaveembraceduntilfouryearsmorehadpassed。

  “ThenewwillwhichIbegantohavewasnotyetstrongenoughtoovercomethatotherwill,strengthenedbylongindulgence。Sothesetwowills,oneold,onenew,onecarnal,theotherspiritual,contendedwitheachotheranddisturbedmysoul。I

  understoodbymyownexperiencewhatIhadread,’fleshlustethagainstspirit,andspiritagainstflesh。’Itwasmyselfindeedinboththewills,yetmoremyselfinthatwhichIapprovedinmyselfthaninthatwhichIdisapprovedinmyself。Yetitwasthroughmyselfthathabithadattainedsofierceamasteryoverme,becauseIhadwillinglycomewhitherIwillednot。Stillboundtoearth,Irefused,OGod,tofightonthyside,asmuchafraidtobefreedfromallbonds,asIoughttohavefearedbeingtrammeledbythem。

  “ThusthethoughtsbywhichImeditatedupontheewereliketheeffortsofonewhowouldawake,butbeingoverpoweredwithsleepinessissoonasleepagain。Oftendoesamanwhenheavysleepinessisonhislimbsdefertoshakeitoff,andthoughnotapprovingit,encourageit;evensoIwassureitwasbettertosurrendertothylovethantoyieldtomyownlusts,yetthoughtheformercourseconvincedme,thelatterpleasedandheldmebound。Therewasnaughtinmetoanswerthycall’Awake,thousleeper,’butonlydrawling,drowsywords,’Presently;yes,presently;waitalittlewhile。’Butthe’presently’hadno’present,’andthe’littlewhile’grewlong……ForIwasafraidthouwouldsthearmetoosoon,andhealmeatonceofmydiseaseoflust,whichIwishedtosatiateratherthantoseeextinguished。WithwhatlashesofwordsdidInotscourgemyownsoul。Yetitshrankback;itrefused,thoughithadnoexcusetooffer……Isaidwithinmyself:’Come,letitbedonenow,’

  andasIsaidit,Iwasonthepointoftheresolve。Iallbutdidit,yetIdidnotdoit。AndImadeanothereffort,andalmostsucceeded,yetIdidnotreachit,anddidnotgraspit,hesitatingtodietodeath,andlivetolife,andtheeviltowhichIwassowontedheldmemorethanthebetterlifeIhadnottried。”

  Therecouldbenomoreperfectdescriptionofthedividedwill,whenthehigherwisheslackjustthatlastacuteness,thattouchofexplosiveintensity,ofdynamogenicqualitytousetheslangofthepsychologists,thatenablesthemtobursttheirshell,andmakeirruptionefficaciouslyintolifeandquellthelowertendenciesforever。Inalaterlectureweshallhavemuchtosayaboutthishigherexcitability。

  IfindanothergooddescriptionofthedividedwillintheautobiographyofHenryAlline,theNovaScotianevangelist,ofwhosemelancholyIreadabriefaccountinmylastlecture。Thepooryouth’ssinswere,asyouwillsee,ofthemostharmlessorder,yettheyinterferedwithwhatprovedtobehistruestvocation,sotheygavehimgreatdistress。

  “Iwasnowverymoralinmylife,butfoundnorestofconscience。Inowbegantobeesteemedinyoungcompany,whoknewnothingofmymindallthiswhile,andtheiresteembegantobeasnaretomysoul,forIsoonbegantobefondofcarnalmirth,thoughIstillflatteredmyselfthatifIdidnotgetdrunk,norcurse,norswear,therewouldbenosininfrolickingandcarnalmirth,andIthoughtGodwouldindulgeyoungpeoplewithsomewhatIcalledsimpleorcivilrecreation。Istillkeptaroundofduties,andwouldnotsuffermyselftorunintoanyopenvices,andsogotalongverywellintimeofhealthandprosperity,butwhenIwasdistressedorthreatenedbysickness,death,orheavystormsofthunder,myreligionwouldnotdo,andIfoundtherewassomethingwanting,andwouldbegintorepentmygoingsomuchtofrolics,butwhenthedistresswasover,thedevilandmyownwickedheart,withthesolicitationsofmyassociates,andmyfondnessforyoungcompany,weresuchstrongallurements,Iwouldagaingiveway,andthusIgottobeverywildandrude,atthesametimekeptupmyroundsofsecretprayerandreading;butGod,notwillingIshoulddestroymyself,stillfollowedmewithhiscalls,andmovedwithsuchpoweruponmyconscience,thatIcouldnotsatisfymyselfwithmydiversions,andinthemidstofmymirthsometimeswouldhavesuchasenseofmylostandundonecondition,thatIwouldwishmyselffromthecompany,andafteritwasover,whenIwenthome,wouldmakemanypromisesthatIwouldattendnomoreonthesefrolics,andwouldbegforgivenessforhoursandhours;butwhenIcametohavethetemptationagain,Iwouldgiveway:nosoonerwouldIhearthemusicanddrinkaglassofwine,butI

  wouldfindmymindelevatedandsoonproceedtoanysortofmerrimentordiversion,thatIthoughtwasnotdebauchedoropenlyvicious;butwhenIreturnedfrommycarnalmirthIfeltasguiltyasever,andcouldsometimesnotclosemyeyesforsomehoursafterIhadgonetomybed。Iwasoneofthemostunhappycreaturesonearth。

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