AnothergorgeousdinnerawaitsthemontheirreturntotheVeneeringhalls，andLadyTippinsawaitsthem，andBootsandBrewerawaitthem。Thereisamodestassertiononeverybody\'spartthateverybodysingle-handed\'broughthimin\'；butinthemainitisconcededbyall，thatthatstrokeofbusinessonBrewer\'spart，ingoingdowntothehousethatnighttoseehowthingslooked，wasthemaster-stroke。
AtouchinglittleincidentisrelatedbyMrsVeneering，inthecourseoftheevening。MrsVeneeringishabituallydisposedtobetearful，andhasanextradispositionthatwayafterherlateexcitement。Previoustowithdrawingfromthedinner-tablewithLadyTippins，shesays，inapatheticandphysicallyweakmanner:
\'Youwillallthinkitfoolishofme，Iknow，butImustmentionit。
AsIsatbyBaby\'scrib，onthenightbeforetheelection，Babywasveryuneasyinhersleep。\'
TheAnalyticalchemist，whoisgloomilylookingon，hasdiabolicalimpulsestosuggest\'Wind\'andthrowuphissituation；butrepressesthem。
\'Afteranintervalalmostconvulsive，Babycurledherlittlehandsinoneanotherandsmiled。\'
MrsVeneeringstoppinghere，MrPodsnapdeemsitincumbentonhimtosay:\'Iwonderwhy！\'
\'Coulditbe，Iaskedmyself，\'saysMrsVeneering，lookingaboutherforherpocket-handkerchief，\'thattheFairiesweretellingBabythatherpapawouldshortlybeanM。P。?\'
SoovercomebythesentimentisMrsVeneering，thattheyallgetuptomakeaclearstageforVeneering，whogoesroundthetabletotherescue，andbearsheroutbackward，withherfeetimpressivelyscrapingthecarpet:afterremarkingthatherworkhasbeentoomuchforherstrength。Whetherthefairiesmadeanymentionofthefivethousandpounds，anditdisagreedwithBaby，isnotspeculatedupon。
PoorlittleTwemlow，quitedoneup，istouched。andstillcontinuestouchedafterheissafelyhousedoverthelivery-stableyardinDukeStreet，SaintJames\'s。Butthere，uponhissofa，atremendousconsiderationbreaksinuponthemildgentleman，puttingallsofterconsiderationstotherout。
\'Graciousheavens！NowIhavetimetothinkofit，heneversawoneofhisconstituentsinallhisdays，untilwesawthemtogether！\'
Afterhavingpacedtheroomindistressofmind，withhishandtohisforehead，theinnocentTwemlowreturnstohissofaandmoans:
\'Ishalleithergodistracted，ordie，ofthisman。Hecomesuponmetoolateinlife。Iamnotstrongenoughtobearhim！\'
Chapter4
CUPIDPROMPTED
Tousethecoldlanguageoftheworld，MrsAlfredLammlerapidlyimprovedtheacquaintanceofMissPodsnap。TousethewarmlanguageofMrsLammle，sheandhersweetGeorgianasoonbecameone:inheart，inmind，insentiment，insoul。
WheneverGeorgianacouldescapefromthethraldomofPodsnappery；couldthrowoffthebedclothesofthecustard-
colouredphaeton，andgetup；couldshrinkoutoftherangeofhermother\'srocking，andsotospeakrescueherpoorlittlefrostytoesfrombeingrockedover；sherepairedtoherfriend，MrsAlfredLammle。MrsPodsnapbynomeansobjected。Asaconsciously\'splendidwoman，\'accustomedtooverhearherselfsodenominatedbyelderlyosteologistspursuingtheirstudiesindinnersociety，MrsPodsnapcoulddispensewithherdaughter。
MrPodsnap，forhispart，onbeinginformedwhereGeorgianawas，swelledwithpatronageoftheLammles。Thatthey，whenunabletolayholdofhim，shouldrespectfullygraspatthehemofhismantle；thatthey，whentheycouldnotbaskinthegloryofhimthesun，shouldtakeupwiththepalereflectedlightofthewateryyoungmoonhisdaughter；appearedquitenatural，becoming，andproper。ItgavehimabetteropinionofthediscretionoftheLammlesthanhehadheretoforeheld，asshowingthattheyappreciatedthevalueoftheconnexion。So，Georgianarepairingtoherfriend，MrPodsnapwentouttodinner，andtodinner，andyettodinner，arminarmwithMrsPodsnap:settlinghisobstinateheadinhiscravatandshirt-collar，muchasifhewereperformingonthePandeanpipes，inhisownhonour，thetriumphalmarch，SeetheconqueringPodsnapcomes，Soundthetrumpets，beatthedrums！
ItwasatraitinMrPodsnap\'scharacterandinoneformorotheritwillbegenerallyseentopervadethedepthsandshallowsofPodsnappery，thathecouldnotendureahintofdisparagementofanyfriendoracquaintanceofhis。\'Howdareyou?\'hewouldseemtosay，insuchacase。\'Whatdoyoumean?Ihavelicensedthisperson。ThispersonhastakenoutMYcertificate。Throughthispersonyoustrikeatme，PodsnaptheGreat。AnditisnotthatI
particularlycarefortheperson\'sdignity，butthatIdomostparticularlycareforPodsnap\'s。\'Hence，ifanyoneinhispresencehadpresumedtodoubttheresponsibilityoftheLammles，hewouldhavebeenmightilyhuffed。Notthatanyonedid，forVeneering，M。P。，wasalwaystheauthorityfortheirbeingveryrich，andperhapsbelievedit。Asindeedhemight，ifhechose，foranythingheknewofthematter。
MrandMrsLammle\'shouseinSackvilleStreet，Piccadilly，wasbutatemporaryresidence。Ithasdonewellenough，theyinformedtheirfriends，forMrLammlewhenabachelor，butitwouldnotdonow。So，theywerealwayslookingatpalatialresidencesinthebestsituations，andalwaysverynearlytakingorbuyingone，butneverquiteconcludingthebargain。Herebytheymadeforthemselvesashininglittlereputationapart。Peoplesaid，onseeingavacantpalatialresidence，\'TheverythingfortheLammles！\'andwrotetotheLammlesaboutit，andtheLammlesalwayswenttolookatit，butunfortunatelyitneverexactlyanswered。Inshort，theysufferedsomanydisappointments，thattheybegantothinkitwouldhenecessarytobuildapalatialresidence。Andherebytheymadeanothershiningreputation；
manypersonsoftheiracquaintancebecomingbyanticipationdissatisfiedwiththeirownhouses，andenviousofthenon-existentLammlestructure。
ThehandsomefittingsandfurnishingsofthehouseinSackvilleStreetwerepiledthickandhighovertheskeletonup-stairs，andifiteverwhisperedfromunderitsloadofupholstery，\'HereIaminthecloset！\'itwastoveryfewears，andcertainlynevertoMissPodsnap\'s。WhatMissPodsnapwasparticularlycharmedwith，nexttothegracesofherfriend，wasthehappinessofherfriend\'smarriedlife。Thiswasfrequentlytheirthemeofconversation。
\'Iamsure，\'saidMissPodsnap，\'MrLammleislikealover。AtleastI——Ishouldthinkhewas。\'
\'Georgiana，darling！\'saidMrsLammle，holdingupaforefinger，\'Takecare！\'
\'Ohmygoodnessme！\'exclaimedMissPodsnap，reddening。\'WhathaveIsaidnow?\'
\'Alfred，youknow，\'hintedMrsLammle，playfullyshakingherhead。\'YouwerenevertosayMrLammleanymore，Georgiana。\'
\'Oh！Alfred，then。Iamgladit\'snoworse。IwasafraidIhadsaidsomethingshocking。Iamalwayssayingsomethingwrongtoma。\'
\'Tome，Georgianadearest?\'
\'No，nottoyou；youarenotma。Iwishyouwere。\'
MrsLammlebestowedasweetandlovingsmileuponherfriend，whichMissPodsnapreturnedasshebestcould。TheysatatlunchinMrsLammle\'sownboudoir。
\'Andso，dearestGeorgiana，Alfredislikeyournotionofalover?\'
\'Idon\'tsaythat，Sophronia，\'Georgianareplied，beginningtoconcealherelbows。\'Ihaven\'tanynotionofalover。Thedreadfulwretchesthatmabringsupatplacestotormentme，arenotlovers。
IonlymeanthatMr——\'
\'Again，dearestGeorgiana?\'
\'ThatAlfred——\'
\'Soundsmuchbetter，darling。\'
\'——Lovesyouso。Healwaystreatsyouwithsuchdelicategallantryandattention。Now，don\'the?\'
\'Truly，mydear，\'saidMrsLammle，witharathersingularexpressioncrossingherface。\'Ibelievethathelovesme，fullyasmuchasIlovehim。\'
\'Oh，whathappiness！\'exclaimedMissPodsnap。
\'Butdoyouknow，myGeorgiana，\'MrsLammleresumedpresently，\'thatthereissomethingsuspiciousinyourenthusiasticsympathywithAlfred\'stenderness?\'
\'Goodgraciousno，Ihopenot！\'
\'Doesn\'titrathersuggest，\'saidMrsLammlearchly，\'thatmyGeorgiana\'slittleheartis——\'
\'Ohdon\'t！\'MissPodsnapblushinglybesoughther。\'Pleasedon\'t！
Iassureyou，Sophronia，thatIonlypraiseAlfred，becauseheisyourhusbandandsofondofyou。\'
Sophronia\'sglancewasasifarathernewlightbrokeinuponher。
Itshadedoffintoacoolsmile，asshesaid，withhereyesuponherlunch，andhereyebrowsraised:
\'Youarequitewrong，mylove，inyourguessatmymeaning。
WhatIinsinuatedwas，thatmyGeorgiana\'slittleheartwasgrowingconsciousofavacancy。\'
\'No，no，no，\'saidGeorgiana。\'Iwouldn\'thaveanybodysayanythingtomeinthatwayforIdon\'tknowhowmanythousandpounds。\'
\'Inwhatway，myGeorgiana?\'inquiredMrsLammle，stillsmilingcoollywithhereyesuponherlunch，andhereyebrowsraised。
\'YOUknow，\'returnedpoorlittleMissPodsnap。\'IthinkIshouldgooutofmymind，Sophronia，withvexationandshynessanddetestation，ifanybodydid。It\'senoughformetoseehowlovingyouandyourhusbandare。That\'sadifferentthing。Icouldn\'tbeartohaveanythingofthatsortgoingonwithmyself。Ishouldbegandprayto——tohavethepersontakenawayandtrampledupon。\'
Ah！herewasAlfred。Havingstoleninunobserved，heplayfullyleanedonthebackofSophronia\'schair，and，asMissPodsnapsawhim，putoneofSophronia\'swanderinglockstohislips，andwavedakissfromittowardsMissPodsnap。
\'Whatisthisabouthusbandsanddetestations?\'inquiredthecaptivatingAlfred。
\'Why，theysay，\'returnedhiswife，\'thatlistenersneverhearanygoodofthemselves；thoughyou——butprayhowlonghaveyoubeenhere，sir?\'
\'Thisinstantarrived，myown。\'
\'ThenImaygoon——thoughifyouhadbeenherebutamomentortwosooner，youwouldhaveheardyourpraisessoundedbyGeorgiana。\'
\'Only，iftheyweretobecalledpraisesatallwhichIreallydon\'tthinktheywere，\'explainedMissPodsnapinaflutter，\'forbeingsodevotedtoSophronia。\'
\'Sophronia！\'murmuredAlfred。\'Mylife！\'andkissedherhand。Inreturnforwhichshekissedhiswatch-chain。
\'ButitwasnotIwhowastobetakenawayandtrampledupon，I
hope?\'saidAlfred，drawingaseatbetweenthem。
\'AskGeorgiana，mysoul，\'repliedhiswife。
AlfredtouchinglyappealedtoGeorgiana。
\'Oh，itwasnobody，\'repliedMissPodsnap。\'Itwasnonsense。\'
\'Butifyouaredeterminedtoknow，MrInquisitivePet，asI
supposeyouare，\'saidthehappyandfondSophronia，smiling，\'itwasanyonewhoshouldventuretoaspiretoGeorgiana。\'
\'Sophronia，mylove，\'remonstratedMrLammle，becominggraver，\'youarenotserious?\'
\'Alfred，mylove，\'returnedhiswife，\'IdaresayGeorgianawasnot，butIam。\'
\'Nowthis，\'saidMrLammle，\'showstheaccidentalcombinationsthatthereareinthings！Couldyoubelieve，myOwnest，thatI
cameinherewiththenameofanaspiranttoourGeorgianaonmylips?\'
\'OfcourseIcouldbelieve，Alfred，\'saidMrsLammle，\'anythingthatYOUtoldme。\'
\'Youdearone！AndIanythingthatYOUtoldme。\'
Howdelightfulthoseinterchanges，andthelooksaccompanyingthem！Now，iftheskeletonup-stairshadtakenthatopportunity，forinstance，ofcallingout\'HereIam，suffocatinginthecloset！\'
\'Igiveyoumyhonour，mydearSophronia——\'
\'AndIknowwhatthatis，love，\'saidshe。
\'Youdo，mydarling——thatIcameintotheroomallbututteringyoungFledgeby\'sname。TellGeorgiana，dearest，aboutyoungFledgeby。\'
\'Ohno，don\'t！Pleasedon\'t！\'criedMissPodsnap，puttingherfingersinherears。\'I\'drathernot。\'
MrsLammlelaughedinhergayestmanner，and，removingherGeorgiana\'sunresistinghands，andplayfullyholdingtheminherownatarms\'length，sometimesneartogetherandsometimeswideapart，wenton:
\'Youmustknow，youdearlybelovedlittlegoose，thatonceuponatimetherewasacertainpersoncalledyoungFledgeby。AndthisyoungFledgeby，whowasofanexcellentfamilyandrich，wasknowntotwoothercertainpersons，dearlyattachedtooneanotherandcalledMrandMrsAlfredLammle。SothisyoungFledgeby，beingonenightattheplay，thereseeswithMrandMrsAlfredLammle，acertainheroinecalled——\'
\'No，don\'tsayGeorgianaPodsnap！\'pleadedthatyoungladyalmostintears。\'Pleasedon\'t。Ohdododosaysomebodyelse！
NotGeorgianaPodsnap。Ohdon\'t，don\'t，don\'t！\'
\'Noother，\'saidMrsLammle，laughingairily，and，fullofaffectionateblandishments，openingandclosingGeorgiana\'sarmslikeapairofcompasses，thanmylittleGeorgianaPodsnap。SothisyoungFledgebygoestothatAlfredLammleandsays——\'
\'Ohple-e-e-easedon\'t！\'Georgiana，asifthesupplicationwerebeingsqueezedoutofherbypowerfulcompression。\'Isohatehimforsayingit！\'
\'Forsayingwhat，mydear?\'laughedMrsLammle。
\'Oh，Idon\'tknowwhathesaid，\'criedGeorgianawildly，\'butIhatehimallthesameforsayingit。\'
\'Mydear，\'saidMrsLammle，alwayslaughinginhermostcaptivatingway，\'thepooryoungfellowonlysaysthatheisstrickenallofaheap。\'
\'Oh，whatshallIeverdo！\'interposedGeorgiana。\'OhmygoodnesswhataFoolhemustbe！\'
\'——Andimplorestobeaskedtodinner，andtomakeafourthattheplayanothertime。Andsohedinesto-morrowandgoestotheOperawithus。That\'sall。Except，mydearGeorgiana——andwhatwillyouthinkofthis！——thatheisinfinitelyshyerthanyou，andfarmoreafraidofyouthanyoueverwereofanyoneinallyourdays！\'
InperturbationofmindMissPodsnapstillfumedandpluckedatherhandsalittle，butcouldnothelplaughingatthenotionofanybody\'sbeingafraidofher。Withthatadvantage，Sophroniaflatteredherandralliedhermoresuccessfully，andthentheinsinuatingAlfredflatteredherandralliedher，andpromisedthatatanymomentwhenshemightrequirethatserviceathishands，hewouldtakeyoungFledgebyoutandtrampleonhim。ThusitremainedamicablyunderstoodthatyoungFledgebywastocometoadmire，andthatGeorgianawastocometobeadmired；andGeorgianawiththeentirelynewsensationinherbreastofhavingthatprospectbeforeher，andwithmanykissesfromherdearSophroniainpresentpossession，precededsixfeetoneofdiscontentedfootmananamountofthearticlethatalwayscameforherwhenshewalkedhometoherfather\'sdwelling。
Thehappypairbeinglefttogether，MrsLammlesaidtoherhusband:
\'IfIunderstandthisgirl，sir，yourdangerousfascinationshaveproducedsomeeffectuponher。ImentiontheconquestingoodtimebecauseIapprehendyourschemetobemoreimportanttoyouthanyourvanity。\'
Therewasamirroronthewallbeforethem，andhereyesjustcaughthimsmirkinginit。Shegavethereflectedimagealookofthedeepestdisdain，andtheimagereceiveditintheglass。Nextmomenttheyquietlyeyedeachother，asifthey，theprincipals，hadhadnopartinthatexpressivetransaction。
ItmayhavebeenthatMrsLammletriedinsomemannertoexcuseherconducttoherselfbydepreciatingthepoorlittlevictimofwhomshespokewithacrimoniouscontempt。Itmayhavebeentoothatinthisshedidnotquitesucceed，foritisverydifficulttoresistconfidence，andsheknewshehadGeorgiana\'s。
Nothingmorewassaidbetweenthehappypair。Perhapsconspiratorswhohaveonceestablishedanunderstanding，maynotbeover-fondofrepeatingthetermsandobjectsoftheirconspiracy。Nextdaycame；cameGeorgiana；andcameFledgeby。
Georgianahadbythistimeseenagooddealofthehouseanditsfrequenters。Astherewasacertainhandsomeroomwithabilliardtableinit——onthegroundfloor，eatingoutabackyard——whichmighthavebeenMrLammle\'soffice，orlibrary，butwascalledbyneithername，butsimplyMrLammle\'sroom，soitwouldhavebeenhardforstrongerfemaleheadsthanGeorgiana\'stodeterminewhetheritsfrequentersweremenofpleasureormenofbusiness。
Betweentheroomandthementherewerestrongpointsofgeneralresemblance。Bothweretoogaudy，tooslangey，tooodorousofcigars，andtoomuchgiventohorseflesh；thelattercharacteristicbeingexemplifiedintheroombyitsdecorations，andinthemenbytheirconversation。High-steppinghorsesseemednecessarytoallMrLammle\'sfriends——asnecessaryastheirtransactionofbusinesstogetherinagipsywayatuntimelyhoursofthemorningandevening，andinrushesandsnatches。
TherewerefriendswhoseemedtobealwayscomingandgoingacrosstheChannel，onerrandsabouttheBourse，andGreekandSpanishandIndiaandMexicanandparandpremiumanddiscountandthreequartersandseveneighths。TherewereotherfriendswhoseemedtobealwayslollingandlounginginandoutoftheCity，onquestionsoftheBourse，andGreekandSpanishandIndiaandMexicanandparandpremiumanddiscountandthreequartersandseveneighths。Theywereallfeverish，boastful，andindefinablyloose；andtheyallateanddrankagreatdeal；andmadebetsineatinganddrinking。Theyallspokeofsumsofmoney，andonlymentionedthesumsandleftthemoneytobeunderstood；as\'fiveandfortythousandTom，\'or\'Twohundredandtwenty-twooneveryindividualshareinthelotJoe。\'Theyseemedtodividetheworldintotwoclassesofpeople；peoplewhoweremakingenormousfortunes，andpeoplewhowerebeingenormouslyruined。Theywerealwaysinahurry，andyetseemedtohavenothingtangibletodo；exceptafewofthemthese，mostlyasthmaticandthick-lippedwhowereforeverdemonstratingtotherest，withgoldpencil-caseswhichtheycouldhardlyholdbecauseofthebigringsontheirforefingers，howmoneywastobemade。Lastly，theyallsworeattheirgrooms，andthegroomswerenotquiteasrespectfulorcompleteasothermen\'sgrooms；seemingsomehowtofallshortofthegroompointastheirmastersfellshortofthegentlemanpoint。
YoungFledgebywasnoneofthese。YoungFledgebyhadapeachycheek，oracheekcompoundedofthepeachandtheredredredwallonwhichitgrows，andwasanawkward，sandy-
haired，small-eyedyouth，exceedingslimhisenemieswouldhavesaidlanky，andpronetoself-examinationinthearticlesofwhiskerandmoustache。Whilefeelingforthewhiskerthatheanxiouslyexpected，Fledgebyunderwentremarkablefluctuationsofspirits，rangingalongthewholescalefromconfidencetodespair。Thereweretimeswhenhestarted，asexclaiming\'ByJupiterhereitisatlast！\'Therewereothertimeswhen，beingequallydepressed，hewouldbeseentoshakehishead，andgiveuphope。Toseehimatthoseperiodsleaningonachimneypiece，likeasonanurncontainingtheashesofhisambition，withthecheekthatwouldnotsprout，uponthehandonwhichthatcheekhadforcedconviction，wasadistressingsight。
NotsowasFledgebyseenonthisoccasion。Arrayedinsuperbraiment，withhisoperahatunderhisarm，heconcludedhisself-
examinationhopefully，awaitedthearrivalofMissPodsnap，andtalkedsmall-talkwithMrsLammle。Infacetioushomagetothesmallnessofhistalk，andthejerkynatureofhismanners，Fledgeby\'sfamiliarshadagreedtoconferuponhimbehindhisbackthehonorarytitleofFascinationFledgeby。
\'Warmweather，MrsLammle，\'saidFascinationFledgeby。MrsLammlethoughtitscarcelyaswarmasithadbeenyesterday。
\'Perhapsnot，\'saidFascinationFledgeby，withgreatquicknessofrepartee；\'butIexpectitwillbedevilishwarmto-morrow。\'
Hethrewoffanotherlittlescintillation。\'Beenoutto-day，MrsLammle?\'
MrsLammleanswered，forashortdrive。
\'Somepeople，\'saidFascinationFledgeby，\'areaccustomedtotakelongdrives；butitgenerallyappearstomethatiftheymake\'emtoolong，theyoverdoit。\'
Beinginsuchfeather，hemighthavesurpassedhimselfinhisnextsally，hadnotMissPodsnapbeenannounced。MrsLammleflewtoembraceherdarlinglittleGeorgy，andwhenthefirsttransportswereover，presentedMrFledgeby。MrLammlecameonthescenelast，forhewasalwayslate，andsowerethefrequentersalwayslate；allhandsbeingboundtobemadelate，byprivateinformationabouttheBourse，andGreekandSpanishandIndiaandMexicanandparandpremiumanddiscountandthreequartersandseveneighths。
Ahandsomelittledinnerwasservedimmediately，andMrLammlesatsparklingathisendofthetable，withhisservantbehindhischair，andHISever-lingeringdoubtsuponthesubjectofhiswagesbehindhimself。MrLammle\'sutmostpowersofsparklingwereinrequisitionto-day，forFascinationFledgebyandGeorgiananotonlystruckeachotherspeechless，butstruckeachotherintoastonishingattitudes；Georgiana，asshesatfacingFledgeby，makingsucheffortstoconcealherelbowsasweretotallyincompatiblewiththeuseofaknifeandfork；andFledgeby，ashesatfacingGeorgiana，avoidinghercountenancebyeverypossibledevice，andbetrayingthediscomposureofhismindinfeelingforhiswhiskerswithhisspoon，hiswineglass，andhisbread。
So，MrandMrsAlfredLammlehadtoprompt，andthisishowtheyprompted。
\'Georgiana，\'saidMrLammle，lowandsmiling，andsparklingallover，likeaharlequin；\'youarenotinyourusualspirits。Whyareyounotinyourusualspirits，Georgiana?\'
Georgianafalteredthatshewasmuchthesameasshewasingeneral；shewasnotawareofbeingdifferent。
\'Notawareofbeingdifferent！\'retortedMrAlfredLammle。\'You，mydearGeorgiana！Whoarealwayssonaturalandunconstrainedwithus！Whoaresucharelieffromthecrowdthatareallalike！Whoaretheembodimentofgentleness，simplicity，andreality！\'
MissPodsnaplookedatthedoor，asifsheentertainedconfusedthoughtsoftakingrefugefromthesecomplimentsinflight。
\'Now，Iwillbejudged，\'saidMrLammle，raisinghisvoicealittle，\'bymyfriendFledgeby。\'
\'OhDON\'T！\'MissPodsnapfaintlyejaculated:whenMrsLammletooktheprompt-book。
\'Ibegyourpardon，Alfred，mydear，butIcannotpartwithMrFledgebyquiteyet；youmustwaitforhimamoment。MrFledgebyandIareengagedinapersonaldiscussion。\'
Fledgebymusthaveconducteditonhissidewithimmenseart，fornoappearanceofutteringonesyllablehadescapedhim。
\'Apersonaldiscussion，Sophronia，mylove?Whatdiscussion?
Fledgeby，Iamjealous。Whatdiscussion，Fledgeby?\'
\'ShallItellhim，MrFledgeby?\'askedMrsLammle。
Tryingtolookasifheknewanythingaboutit，Fascinationreplied，\'Yes，tellhim。\'
\'Wewerediscussingthen，\'saidMrsLammle，\'ifyouMUSTknow，Alfred，whetherMrFledgebywasinhisusualflowofspirits。\'
\'Why，thatistheverypoint，Sophronia，thatGeorgianaandIwerediscussingastoherself！WhatdidFledgebysay?\'
\'Oh，alikelything，sir，thatIamgoingtotellyoueverything，andbetoldnothing！WhatdidGeorgianasay?\'
\'Georgianasaidshewasdoingherusualjusticetoherselfto-day，andIsaidshewasnot。\'
\'Precisely，\'exclaimedMrsLammle，\'whatIsaidtoMrFledgeby。\'
Still，itwouldn\'tdo。Theywouldnotlookatoneanother。No，notevenwhenthesparklinghostproposedthatthequartetteshouldtakeanappropriatelysparklingglassofwine。GeorgianalookedfromherwineglassatMrLammleandatMrsLammle；butmightn\'t，couldn\'t，shouldn\'t，wouldn\'t，lookatMrFledgeby。
FascinationlookedfromhiswineglassatMrsLammleandatMrLammle；butmightn\'t，couldn\'t，shouldn\'t，wouldn\'t，lookatGeorgiana。
Morepromptingwasnecessary。Cupidmustbebroughtuptothemark。Themanagerhadputhimdowninthebillforthepart，andhemustplayit。
\'Sophronia，mydear，\'saidMrLammle，\'Idon\'tlikethecolourofyourdress。\'
\'Iappeal，\'saidMrsLammle，\'toMrFledgeby。\'
\'AndI，\'saidMrLammle，\'toGeorgiana。\'
\'Georgy，mylove，\'remarkedMrsLammleasidetoherdeargirl，\'I
relyuponyounottogoovertotheopposition。Now，MrFledgeby。\'
Fascinationwishedtoknowifthecolourwerenotcalledrose-
colour?Yes，saidMrLammle；actuallyhekneweverything；itwasreallyrose-colour。Fascinationtookrose-colourtomeanthecolourofroses。InthishewasverywarmlysupportedbyMrandMrsLammle。FascinationhadheardthetermQueenofFlowersappliedtotheRose。Similarly，itmightbesaidthatthedresswastheQueenofDresses。\'Veryhappy，Fledgeby！\'fromMrLammle。Notwithstanding，Fascination\'sopinionwasthatweallhadoureyes——oratleastalargemajorityofus——andthat——and——andhisfartheropinionwasseveralands，withnothingbeyondthem。
\'Oh，MrFledgeby，\'saidMrsLammle，\'todesertmeinthatway！
Oh，MrFledgeby，toabandonmypoordearinjuredroseanddeclareforblue！\'
\'Victory，victory！\'criedMrLammle；\'yourdressiscondemned，mydear。\'
\'Butwhat，\'saidMrsLammle，stealingheraffectionatehandtowardsherdeargirl\'s，\'whatdoesGeorgysay?\'
\'Shesays，\'repliedMrLammle，interpretingforher，\'thatinhereyesyoulookwellinanycolour，Sophronia，andthatifshehadexpectedtobeembarrassedbysoprettyacomplimentasshehasreceived，shewouldhavewornanothercolourherself。ThoughI
tellher，inreply，thatitwouldnothavesavedher，forwhatevercolourshehadwornwouldhavebeenFledgeby\'scolour。ButwhatdoesFledgebysay?\'
\'Hesays，\'repliedMrsLammle，interpretingforhim，andpattingthebackofherdeargirl\'shand，asifitwereFledgebywhowaspattingit，\'thatitwasnocompliment，butalittlenaturalactofhomagethathecouldn\'tresist。And，\'expressingmorefeelingasifitweremorefeelingonthepartofFledgeby，\'heisright，heisright！\'
Still，nonotevennow，wouldtheylookatoneanother。Seemingtognashhissparklingteeth，studs，eyes，andbuttons，allatonce，MrLammlesecretlybentadarkfrownonthetwo，expressiveofanintensedesiretobringthemtogetherbyknockingtheirheadstogether。
\'Haveyouheardthisoperaofto-night，Fledgeby?\'heasked，stoppingveryshort，topreventhimselffromrunningoninto\'confoundyou。\'
\'Whyno，notexactly，\'saidFledgeby。\'InfactIdon\'tknowanoteofit。\'
\'Neitherdoyouknowit，Georgy?\'saidMrsLammle。\'N-no，\'
repliedGeorgiana，faintly，underthesympatheticcoincidence。
\'Why，then，\'saidMrsLammle，charmedbythediscoverywhichflowedfromthepremises，\'youneitherofyouknowit！Howcharming！\'
EventhecravenFledgebyfeltthatthetimewasnowcomewhenhemuststrikeablow。Hestruckitbysaying，partlytoMrsLammleandpartlytothecircumambientair，\'Iconsidermyselfveryfortunateinbeingreservedby——\'
Ashestoppeddead，MrLammle，makingthatgingerousbushofhiswhiskerstolookoutof，offeredhimtheword\'Destiny。\'
\'No，Iwasn\'tgoingtosaythat，\'saidFledgeby。\'IwasgoingtosayFate。IconsideritveryfortunatethatFatehaswritteninthebookof——inthebookwhichisitsownproperty——thatIshouldgotothatoperaforthefirsttimeunderthememorablecircumstancesofgoingwithMissPodsnap。\'
TowhichGeorgianareplied，hookinghertwolittlefingersinoneanother，andaddressingthetablecloth，\'Thankyou，butIgenerallygowithnoonebutyou，Sophronia，andIlikethatverymuch。\'
Contentperforcewiththissuccessforthetime，MrLammleletMissPodsnapoutoftheroom，asifhewereopeninghercagedoor，andMrsLammlefollowed。Coffeebeingpresentlyservedupstairs，hekeptawatchonFledgebyuntilMissPodsnap\'scupwasempty，andthendirectedhimwithhisfingerasifthatyounggentlemanwereaslowRetrievertogoandfetchit。Thisfeatheperformed，notonlywithoutfailure，butevenwiththeoriginalembellishmentofinformingMissPodsnapthatgreenteawasconsideredbadforthenerves。ThoughthereMissPodsnapunintentionallythrewhimoutbyfaltering，\'Oh，isitindeed?Howdoesitact?\'Whichhewasnotpreparedtoelucidate。
Thecarriageannounced，MrsLammlesaid；\'Don\'tmindme，MrFledgeby，myskirtsandcloakoccupybothmyhands，takeMissPodsnap。\'Andhetookher，andMrsLammlewentnext，andMrLammlewentlast，savagelyfollowinghislittleflock，likeadrover。
ButhewasallsparkleandglitterintheboxattheOpera，andthereheandhisdearwifemadeaconversationbetweenFledgebyandGeorgianainthefollowingingeniousandskilfulmanner。
Theysatinthisorder:MrsLammle，FascinationFledgeby，Georgiana，MrLammle。MrsLammlemadeleadingremarkstoFledgeby，onlyrequiringmonosyllabicreplies。MrLammledidthelikewithGeorgiana。AttimesMrsLammlewouldleanforwardtoaddressMrLammletothispurpose。
\'Alfred，mydear，MrFledgebyveryjustlysays，aproposofthelastscene，thattrueconstancywouldnotrequireanysuchstimulantasthestagedeemsnecessary。\'TowhichMrLammlewouldreply，\'Ay，Sophronia，mylove，butasGeorgianahasobservedtome，theladyhadnosufficientreasontoknowthestateofthegentleman\'saffections。\'TowhichMrsLammlewouldrejoin，\'Verytrue，Alfred；butMrFledgebypointsout，\'this。TowhichAlfredwoulddemur:\'Undoubtedly，Sophronia，butGeorgianaacutelyremarks，\'
that。Throughthisdevicethetwoyoungpeopleconversedatgreatlengthandcommittedthemselvestoavarietyofdelicatesentiments，withouthavingonceopenedtheirlips，savetosayyesorno，andeventhatnottooneanother。
FledgebytookhisleaveofMissPodsnapatthecarriagedoor，andtheLammlesdroppedheratherownhome，andonthewayMrsLammlearchlyralliedher，inherfondandprotectingmanner，bysayingatintervals，\'OhlittleGeorgiana，littleGeorgiana！\'Whichwasnotmuch；butthetoneadded，\'YouhaveenslavedyourFledgeby。\'
AndthustheLammlesgothomeatlast，andtheladysatdownmoodyandweary，lookingatherdarklordengagedinadeedofviolencewithabottleofsoda-waterasthoughhewerewringingtheneckofsomeunluckycreatureandpouringitsblooddownhisthroat。Ashewipedhisdrippingwhiskersinanogreishway，hemethereyes，andpausing，said，withnoverygentlevoice:
\'Well?\'
\'WassuchanabsoluteBoobynecessarytothepurpose?\'
\'IknowwhatIamdoing。Heisnosuchdoltasyousuppose。\'
\'Agenius，perhaps?\'
\'Yousneer，perhaps；andyoutakealoftyairuponyourselfperhaps！ButItellyouthis:——whenthatyoungfellow\'sinterestisconcerned，heholdsastightasahorse-leech。Whenmoneyisinquestionwiththatyoungfellow，heisamatchfortheDevil。\'
\'Isheamatchforyou?\'
\'Heis。Almostasgoodaoneasyouthoughtmeforyou。Hehasnoqualityofyouthinhim，butsuchasyouhaveseento-day。
Touchhimuponmoney，andyoutouchnoboobythen。Hereallyisadolt，Isuppose，inotherthings；butitanswershisonepurposeverywell。\'
\'Hasshemoneyinherownrightinanycase?\'
\'Ay！shehasmoneyinherownrightinanycase。Youhavedonesowellto-day，Sophronia，thatIanswerthequestion，thoughyouknowIobjecttoanysuchquestions。Youhavedonesowellto-
day，Sophronia，thatyoumustbetired。Gettobed。\'
Chapter5
MERCURYPROMPTING
FledgebydeservedMrAlfredLammle\'seulogium。Hewasthemeanestcurexisting，withasinglepairoflegs。Andinstinctawordweallclearlyunderstandgoinglargelyonfourlegs，andreasonalwaysontwo，meannessonfourlegsneverattainstheperfectionofmeannessontwo。
Thefatherofthisyounggentlemanhadbeenamoney-lender，whohadtransactedprofessionalbusinesswiththemotherofthisyounggentleman，whenhe，thelatter，waswaitinginthevastdarkante-
chambersofthepresentworldtobeborn。Thelady，awidow，beingunabletopaythemoney-lender，marriedhim；andinduecourse，Fledgebywassummonedoutofthevastdarkante-
chamberstocomeandbepresentedtotheRegistrar-General。
RatheracuriousspeculationhowFledgehywouldotherwisehavedisposedofhisleisureuntilDoomsday。
Fledgeby\'smotheroffendedherfamilybymarryingFledgeby\'sfather。Itisoneoftheeasiestachievementsinlifetooffendyourfamilywhenyourfamilywanttogetridofyou。Fledgeby\'smother\'sfamilyhadbeenverymuchoffendedwithherforbeingpoor，andbrokewithherforbecomingcomparativelyrich。
Fledgeby\'smother\'sfamilywastheSnigsworthfamily。ShehadeventhehighhonourtobecousintoLordSnigsworth——somanytimesremovedthatthenobleEarlwouldhavehadnocompunctioninremovingheronetimemoreanddroppinghercleanoutsidethecousinlypale；butcousinforallthat。
Amongherpre-matrimonialtransactionswithFledgeby\'sfather，Fledgeby\'smotherhadraisedmoneyofhimatagreatdisadvantageonacertainreversionaryinterest。Thereversionfallinginsoonaftertheyweremarried，Fledgeby\'sfatherlaidholdofthecashforhisseparateuseandbenefit。Thisledtosubjectivedifferencesofopinion，nottosayobjectiveinterchangesofboot-
jacks，backgammonboards，andothersuchdomesticmissiles，betweenFledgeby\'sfatherandFledgeby\'smother，andthoseledtoFledgeby\'smotherspendingasmuchmoneyasshecould，andtoFledgeby\'sfatherdoingallhecouldn\'ttorestrainher。Fledgeby\'schildhoodhadbeen，inconsequence，astormyone；butthewindsandthewaveshadgonedowninthegrave，andFledgebyflourishedalone。
HelivedinchambersintheAlbany，didFledgeby，andmaintainedaspruceappearance。Buthisyouthfulfirewasallcomposedofsparksfromthegrindstone；andasthesparksflewoff，wentout，andneverwarmedanything，besurethatFledgebyhadhistoolsatthegrindstone，andturneditwithawaryeye。
MrAlfredLammlecameroundtotheAlbanytobreakfastwithFledgeby。Presentonthetable，onescantypotoftea，onescantyloaf，twoscantypatsofbutter，twoscantyrashersofbacon，twopitifuleggs，andanabundanceofhandsomechinaboughtasecondhandbargain。
\'WhatdidyouthinkofGeorgiana?\'askedMrLammle。
\'Why，I\'lltellyou，\'saidFledgeby，verydeliberately。
\'Do，myboy。\'
\'Youmisunderstandme，\'saidFledgeby。\'Idon\'tmeanI\'lltellyouthat。ImeanI\'lltellyousomethingelse。\'
\'Tellmeanything，oldfellow！\'
\'Ah，butthereyoumisunderstandmeagain，\'saidFledgeby。\'I
meanI\'lltellyounothing。\'
MrLammlesparkledathim，butfrownedathimtoo。
\'Lookhere，\'saidFledgeby。\'You\'redeepandyou\'reready。
WhetherIamdeepornot，nevermind。Iamnotready。ButIcandoonething，Lammle，Icanholdmytongue。AndIintendalwaysdoingit。\'
\'Youarealong-headedfellow，Fledgeby。\'
\'Maybe，ormaynotbe。IfIamashort-tonguedfellow，itmayamounttothesamething。Now，Lammle，Iamnevergoingtoanswerquestions。\'
\'Mydearfellow，itwasthesimplestquestionintheworld。\'
\'Nevermind。Itseemedso，butthingsarenotalwayswhattheyseem。IsawamanexaminedasawitnessinWestminsterHall。
Questionsputtohimseemedthesimplestintheworld，butturnedouttobeanythingratherthanthat，afterhehadanswered\'em。
Verywell。Thenheshouldhaveheldhistongue。Ifhehadheldhistonguehewouldhavekeptoutofscrapesthathegotinto。\'
\'IfIhadheldmytongue，youwouldneverhaveseenthesubjectofmyquestion，\'remarkedLammle，darkening。
\'Now，Lammle，\'saidFascinationFledgeby，calmlyfeelingforhiswhisker，\'itwon\'tdo。Iwon\'tbeledonintoadiscussion。Ican\'tmanageadiscussion。ButIcanmanagetoholdmytongue。\'
\'Can?\'MrLammiefellbackuponpropitiation。\'Ishouldthinkyoucould！Why，whenthesefellowsofouracquaintancedrinkandyoudrinkwiththem，themoretalkativetheyget，themoresilentyouget。Themoretheyletout，themoreyoukeepin。\'
\'Idon\'tobject，Lammle，\'returnedFledgeby，withaninternalchuckle，\'tobeingunderstood，thoughIobjecttobeingquestioned。
ThatcertainlyISthewayIdoit。\'
\'Andwhenalltherestofusarediscussingourventures，noneofuseverknowwhatasingleventureofyoursis！\'
\'Andnoneofyoueverwillfromme，Lammle，\'repliedFledgeby，withanotherinternalchuckle；\'thatcertainlyISthewayIdoit。\'
\'Whyofcourseitis，Iknow！\'rejoinedLammle，withaflourishoffrankness，andalaugh，andstretchingouthishandsasiftoshowtheuniversearemarkablemaninFledgeby。\'IfIhadn\'tknownitofmyFledgeby，shouldIhaveproposedourlittlecompactofadvantage，tomyFledgeby?\'
\'Ah！\'remarkedFascination，shakinghisheadslyly。\'ButIamnottobegotatinthatway。Iamnotvain。Thatsortofvanitydon\'tpay，Lammle。No，no，no。Complimentsonlymakemeholdmytonguethemore。\'
AlfredLammlepushedhisplateawaynogreatsacrificeunderthecircumstancesoftherebeingsolittleinit，thrusthishandsinhispockets，leanedbackinhischair，andcontemplatedFledgebyinsilence。Thenheslowlyreleasedhislefthandfromitspocket，andmadethatbushofhiswhiskers，stillcontemplatinghiminsilence。Thenheslowlybrokesilence，andslowlysaid:\'What——
the——Dev-ilisthisfellowaboutthismorning?\'
\'Now，lookhere，Lammle，\'saidFascinationFledgeby，withthemeanestoftwinklesinhismeanestofeyes:whichweretooneartogether，bytheway:\'lookhere，Lammle；IamverywellawarethatIdidn\'tshowtoadvantagelastnight，andthatyouandyourwife——who，Iconsider，isaverycleverwomanandanagreeablewoman——did。Iamnotcalculatedtoshowtoadvantageunderthatsortofcircumstances。Iknowverywellyoutwodidshowtoadvantage，andmanagedcapitally。Butdon\'tyouonthataccountcometalkingtomeasifIwasyourdollandpuppet，becauseIamnot。
\'Andallthis，\'criedAlfred，afterstudyingwithalookthemeannessthatwasfaintohavethemeanesthelp，andyetwassomeanastoturnuponit:\'allthisbecauseofonesimplenaturalquestion！\'
\'YoushouldhavewaitedtillIthoughtpropertosaysomethingaboutitofmyself。Idon\'tlikeyourcomingovermewithyourGeorgianas，asifyouwasherproprietorandminetoo。\'
\'Well，whenyouareinthegraciousmindtosayanythingaboutitofyourself，\'retortedLammle，\'praydo。\'
\'Ihavedoneit。Ihavesaidyoumanagedcapitally。Youandyourwifeboth。Ifyou\'llgoonmanagingcapitally，I\'llgoondoingmypart。Onlydon\'tcrow。\'
\'Icrow！\'exclaimedLammle，shrugginghisshoulders。
\'Or，\'pursuedtheother——\'ortakeitinyourheadthatpeopleareyourpuppetsbecausetheydon\'tcomeouttoadvantageattheparticularmomentswhenyoudo，withtheassistanceofaverycleverandagreeablewife。Alltherestkeepondoing，andletMrsLammlekeepondoing。Now，IhaveheldmytonguewhenI
thoughtproper，andIhavespokenwhenIthoughtproper，andthere\'sanendofthat。Andnowthequestionis，\'proceededFledgeby，withthegreatestreluctance，\'willyouhaveanotheregg?\'
\'No，Iwon\'t，\'saidLammle，shortly。
\'Perhapsyou\'rerightandwillfindyourselfbetterwithoutit，\'
repliedFascination，ingreatlyimprovedspirits。\'Toaskyouifyou\'llhaveanotherrasherwouldbeunmeaningflattery，foritwouldmakeyouthirstyallday。Willyouhavesomemorebreadandbutter?\'
\'No，Iwon\'t，\'repeatedLammle。
\'ThenIwill，\'saidFascination。Anditwasnotamereretortforthesound\'ssake，butwasacheerfulcogentconsequenceoftherefusal；forifLammlehadappliedhimselfagaintotheloaf，itwouldhavebeensoheavilyvisited，inFledgeby\'sopinion，astodemandabstinencefrombread，onhispart，fortheremainderofthatmealatleast，ifnotforthewholeofthenext。
Whetherthisyounggentlemanforhewasbutthree-and-twenty
combinedwiththemiserlyviceofanoldman，anyoftheopen-
handedvicesofayoungone，wasamootpoint；soveryhonourablydidhekeephisowncounsel。Hewassensibleofthevalueofappearancesasaninvestment，andlikedtodresswell；buthedroveabargainforeverymoveableabouthim，fromthecoatonhisbacktothechinaonhisbreakfast-table；andeverybargainbyrepresentingsomebody\'sruinorsomebody\'sloss，acquiredapeculiarcharmforhim。Itwasapartofhisavaricetotake，withinnarrowbounds，longoddsatraces；ifhewon，hedroveharderbargains；ifhelost，hehalfstarvedhimselfuntilnexttime。WhymoneyshouldbesoprecioustoanAsstoodullandmeantoexchangeitforanyothersatisfaction，isstrange；butthereisnoanimalsosuretogetladenwithit，astheAsswhoseesnothingwrittenonthefaceoftheearthandskybutthethreelettersL。S。
D——notLuxury，Sensuality，Dissoluteness，whichtheyoftenstandfor，butthethreedryletters。YourconcentratedFoxisseldomcomparabletoyourconcentratedAssinmoney-breeding。
FascinationFledgebyfeignedtobeayounggentlemanlivingonhismeans，butwasknownsecretlytobeakindofoutlawinthebill-brokingline，andtoputmoneyoutathighinterestinvariousways。Hiscircleoffamiliaracquaintance，fromMrLammleround，allhadatouchoftheoutlaw，astotheirrovingsinthemerrygreenwoodofJobberyForest，lyingontheoutskirtsoftheShare-MarketandtheStockExchange。
\'Isupposeyou，Lammle，\'saidFledgeby，eatinghisbreadandbutter，\'alwaysdidgoinforfemalesociety?\'
\'Always，\'repliedLammle，gloomingconsiderablyunderhislatetreatment。
\'Camenaturaltoyou，eh?\'saidFledgeby。
\'Thesexwerepleasedtolikeme，sir，\'saidLammlesulkily，butwiththeairofamanwhohadnotbeenabletohelphimself。
\'Madeaprettygoodthingofmarrying，didn\'tyou?\'askedFledgeby。
Theothersmiledanuglysmile，andtappedonetapuponhisnose。
\'Mylategovernormadeamessofit，\'saidFledgeby。\'ButGeor——istherightnameGeorginaorGeorgiana?\'
\'Georgiana。\'
\'Iwasthinkingyesterday，Ididn\'tknowtherewassuchaname。I
thoughtitmustendinina。
\'Why?\'
\'Why，youplay——ifyoucan——theConcertina，youknow，\'repliedFledgeby，meditatingveryslowly。\'Andyouhave——whenyoucatchit——theScarlatina。Andyoucancomedownfromaballooninaparach——noyoucan\'tthough。Well，sayGeorgeute——ImeanGeorgiana。\'
\'YouweregoingtoremarkofGeorgiana——?\'Lammlemoodilyhinted，afterwaitinginvain。
\'IwasgoingtoremarkofGeorgiana，sir，\'saidFledgeby，notatallpleasedtoberemindedofhishavingforgottenit，\'thatshedon\'tseemtobeviolent。Don\'tseemtobeofthepitching-inorder。\'
\'Shehasthegentlenessofthedove，MrFledgeby。\'
\'Ofcourseyou\'llsayso，\'repliedFledgeby，sharpening，themomenthisinterestwastouchedbyanother。\'Butyouknow，thereallook-
outisthis:——whatIsay，notwhatyousay。Isayhavingmylategovernorandmylatemotherinmyeye——thatGeorgianadon\'tseemtobeofthepitching-inorder。\'
TherespectedMrLammlewasabully，bynatureandbyusualpractice。Perceiving，asFledgeby\'saffrontscumulated，thatconciliationbynomeansansweredthepurposehere，henowdirectedascowlinglookintoFledgeby\'ssmalleyesfortheeffectoftheoppositetreatment。Satisfiedbywhathesawthere，heburstintoaviolentpassionandstruckhishanduponthetable，makingthechinaringanddance。
\'Youareaveryoffensivefellow，sir，\'criedMrLammle，rising。
\'Youareahighlyoffensivescoundrel。Whatdoyoumeanbythisbehaviour?\'
\'Isay！\'remonstratedFledgeby。\'Don\'tbreakout。\'
\'Youareaveryoffensivefellowsir，\'repeatedMrLammle。\'Youareahighlyoffensivescoundrel！\'
\'ISAY，youknow！\'urgedFledgeby，quailing。
\'Why，youcoarseandvulgarvagabond！\'saidMrLammle，lookingfiercelyabouthim，\'ifyourservantwasheretogivemesixpenceofyourmoneytogetmybootscleanedafterwards——foryouarenotworththeexpenditure——I\'dkickyou。\'
\'Noyouwouldn\'t，\'pleadedFledgeby。\'Iamsureyou\'dthinkbetterofit。\'
\'Itellyouwhat，MrFledgeby，\'saidLammleadvancingonhim。
\'Sinceyoupresumetocontradictme，I\'llassertmyselfalittle。
Givemeyournose！\'
Fledgebycovereditwithhishandinstead，andsaid，retreating，\'I
begyouwon\'t！\'
\'Givemeyournose，sir，\'repeatedLammle。
Stillcoveringthatfeatureandbacking，MrFledgebyreiteratedapparentlywithaseverecoldinhishead，\'Ibeg，Ibeg，youwon\'t。\'
\'Andthisfellow，\'exclaimedLammle，stoppingandmakingthemostofhischest——\'ThisfellowpresumesonmyhavingselectedhimoutofalltheyoungfellowsIknow，foranadvantageousopportunity！Thisfellowpresumesonmyhavinginmydeskroundthecorner，hisdirtynoteofhandforawretchedsumpayableontheoccurrenceofacertainevent，whicheventcanonlybeofmyandmywife\'sbringingabout！Thisfellow，Fledgeby，presumestobeimpertinenttome，Lammle。Givemeyournosesir！\'
\'No！Stop！Ibegyourpardon，\'saidFledgeby，withhumility。
\'Whatdoyousay，sir?\'demandedMrLammle，seemingtoofurioustounderstand。
\'Ibegyourpardon，\'repeatedFledgeby。
\'Repeatyourwordslouder，sir。Thejustindignationofagentlemanhassentthebloodboilingtomyhead。Idon\'thearyou。\'
\'Isay，\'repeatedFledgeby，withlaboriousexplanatorypoliteness，\'I
begyourpardon。\'
MrLammlepaused。\'Asamanofhonour，\'saidhe，throwinghimselfintoachair，\'Iamdisarmed。\'
MrFledgebyalsotookachair，thoughlessdemonstratively，andbyslowapproachesremovedhishandfromhisnose。Somenaturaldiffidenceassailedhimastoblowingit，soshortlyafteritshavingassumedapersonalanddelicate，nottosaypublic，character；butheovercamehisscruplesbydegrees，andmodestlytookthatlibertyunderanimpliedprotest。
\'Lammle，\'hesaidsneakingly，whenthatwasdone，\'Ihopewearefriendsagain?\'
\'MrFledgeby，\'returnedLammle，\'saynomore。\'
\'Imusthavegonetoofarinmakingmyselfdisagreeable，\'saidFledgeby，\'butIneverintendedit。\'
\'Saynomore，saynomore！\'MrLammlerepeatedinamagnificenttone。\'Givemeyour\'——Fledgebystarted——\'hand。\'
Theyshookhands，andonMrLammle\'spart，inparticular，thereensuedgreatgeniality。For，hewasquiteasmuchofadastardastheother，andhadbeeninequaldangeroffallingintothesecondplaceforgood，whenhetookheartjustintime，toactupontheinformationconveyedtohimbyFledgeby\'seye。
Thebreakfastendedinaperfectunderstanding。IncessantmachinationsweretobekeptatworkbyMrandMrsLammle；
lovewastobemadeforFledgeby，andconquestwastobeinsuredtohim；heonhispartveryhumblyadmittinghisdefectsastothesoftersocialarts，andentreatingtobebackedtotheutmostbyhistwoablecoadjutors。
LittlereckedMrPodsnapofthetrapsandtoilsbesettinghisYoungPerson。HeregardedherassafewithintheTempleofPodsnappery，hidingthefulnessoftimewhenshe，Georgiana，shouldtakehim，Fitz-Podsnap，whowithallhisworldlygoodsshouldherendow。ItwouldcallablushintothecheekofhisstandardYoungPersontohaveanythingtodowithsuchmatterssavetotakeasdirected，andwithworldlygoodsaspersettlementtobeendowed。Whogiveththiswomantobemarriedtothisman?I，Podsnap。Perishthedaringthoughtthatanysmallercreationshouldcomebetween！
Itwasapublicholiday，andFledgebydidnotrecoverhisspiritsorhisusualtemperatureofnoseuntiltheafternoon。WalkingintotheCityintheholidayafternoon，hewalkedagainstalivingstreamsettingoutofit；andthus，whenheturnedintotheprecinctsofStMaryAxe，hefoundaprevalentreposeandquietthere。Ayellowoverhangingplaster-frontedhouseatwhichbestoppedwasquiettoo。Theblindswerealldrawndown，andtheinscriptionPubseyandCo。seemedtodozeinthecounting-housewindowontheground-floorgivingonthesleepystreet。
Fledgebyknockedandrang，andFledgebyrangandknocked，butnoonecame。Fledgebycrossedthenarrowstreetandlookedupatthehouse-windows，butnobodylookeddownatFledgeby。Hegotoutoftemper，crossedthenarrowstreetagain，andpulledthehousebellasifitwerethehouse\'snose，andheweretakingahintfromhislateexperience。Hisearatthekeyholeseemedthen，atlast，togivehimassurancethatsomethingstirredwithin。Hiseyeatthekeyholeseemedtoconfirmhisear，forheangrilypulledthehouse\'snoseagain，andpulledandpulledandcontinuedtopull，untilahumannoseappearedinthedarkdoorway。
\'Nowyousir！\'criedFledgeby。\'Thesearenicegames！\'
HeaddressedanoldJewishmaninanancientcoat，longofskirt，andwideofpocket。Avenerableman，baldandshiningatthetopofhishead，andwithlonggreyhairflowingdownatitssidesandminglingwithhisbeard。AmanwhowithagracefulEasternactionofhomagebenthishead，andstretchedouthishandswiththepalmsdownward，asiftodeprecatethewrathofasuperior。
\'Whathaveyoubeenupto?\'saidFledgeby，stormingathim。
\'GenerousChristianmaster，\'urgedtheJewishman，\'itbeingholiday，Ilookedfornoone。\'
\'Holidayheblowed！\'saidFledgeby，entering。\'WhathaveYOU
gottodowithholidays?Shutthedoor。\'
Withhisformeractiontheoldmanobeyed。Intheentryhunghisrustylarge-brimmedlow-crownedhat，aslongoutofdateashiscoat；inthecornernearitstoodhisstaff——nowalking-stickbutaveritablestaff。Fledgebyturnedintothecounting-house，perchedhimselfonabusinessstool，andcockedhishat。Therewerelightboxesonshelvesinthecounting-house，andstringsofmockbeadshangingup。Thereweresamplesofcheapclocks，andsamplesofcheapvasesofflowers。Foreigntoys，all。
Perchedonthestoolwithhishatcockedonhisheadandoneofhislegsdangling，theyouthofFledgebyhardlycontrastedtoadvantagewiththeageoftheJewishmanashestoodwithhisbareheadbowed，andhiseyeswhichheonlyraisedinspeaking
ontheground。Hisclothingwasworndowntotherustyhueofthehatintheentry，butthoughhelookedshabbyhedidnotlookmean。Now，Fledgeby，thoughnotshabby，didlookmean。
\'Youhavenottoldmewhatyouwereupto，yousir，\'saidFledgeby，scratchinghisheadwiththebrimofhishat。
\'Sir，Iwasbreathingtheair。\'
\'Inthecellar，thatyoudidn\'thear?\'
\'Onthehouse-top。\'
\'Uponmysoul！That\'sawayofdoingbusiness。\'
\'Sir，\'theoldmanrepresentedwithagraveandpatientair，\'theremustbetwopartiestothetransactionofbusiness，andtheholidayhasleftmealone。\'
\'Ah！Can\'tbebuyerandsellertoo。That\'swhattheJewssay；ain\'tit?\'
\'Atleastwesaytruly，ifwesayso，\'answeredtheoldmanwithasmile。
\'Yourpeopleneedspeakthetruthsometimes，fortheylieenough，\'
remarkedFascinationFledgeby。
\'Sir，thereis，\'returnedtheoldmanwithquietemphasis，\'toomuchuntruthamongalldenominationsofmen。\'
Ratherdashed，FascinationFledgebytookanotherscratchathisintellectualheadwithhishat，togaintimeforrallying。
\'Forinstance，\'heresumed，asthoughitwerehewhohadspokenlast，\'whobutyouandIeverheardofapoorJew?\'
\'TheJews，\'saidtheoldman，raisinghiseyesfromthegroundwithhisformersmile。\'TheyhearofpoorJewsoften，andareverygoodtothem。\'
\'Botherthat！\'returnedFledgeby。\'YouknowwhatImean。You\'dpersuademeifyoucould，thatyouareapoorJew。Iwishyou\'dconfesshowmuchyoureallydidmakeoutofmylategovernor。I
shouldhaveabetteropinionofyou。\'
Theoldmanonlybenthishead，andstretchedouthishandsasbefore。
\'Don\'tgoonposturinglikeaDeafandDumbSchool，\'saidtheingeniousFledgeby，\'butexpressyourselflikeaChristian——orasnearlyasyoucan。\'
\'Ihadhadsicknessandmisfortunes，andwassopoor，\'saidtheoldman，\'ashopelesslytoowethefather，principalandinterest。Thesoninheriting，wassomercifulastoforgivemeboth，andplacemehere。\'
Hemadealittlegestureasthoughhekissedthehemofanimaginarygarmentwornbythenobleyouthbeforehim。Itwashumblydone，butpicturesquely，andwasnotabasingtothedoer。
\'Youwon\'tsaymore，Isee，\'saidFledgeby，lookingathimasifhewouldliketotrytheeffectofextractingadouble-toothortwo，\'andsoit\'sofnousemyputtingittoyou。Butconfessthis，Riah；
whobelievesyoutobepoornow?\'
\'Noone，\'saidtheoldman。
\'Thereyou\'reright，\'assentedFledgeby。
\'Noone，\'repeatedtheoldmanwithagraveslowwaveofhishead。\'Allscoutitasafable。WereItosay“Thislittlefancybusinessisnotmine“；\'withalithesweepofhiseasily-turninghandaroundhim，tocomprehendthevariousobjectsontheshelves；\'“itisthelittlebusinessofaChristianyounggentlemanwhoplacesme，hisservant，intrustandchargehere，andtowhomIamaccountableforeverysinglebead，“theywouldlaugh。
When，inthelargermoney-business，Itelltheborrowers——\'
\'Isay，oldchap！\'interposedFledgeby，\'IhopeyoumindwhatyouDOtell\'em?\'
\'Sir，ItellthemnomorethanIamabouttorepeat。WhenItellthem，“Icannotpromisethis，Icannotanswerfortheother，Imustseemyprincipal，Ihavenotthemoney，Iamapoormananditdoesnotrestwithme，“theyaresounbelievingandsoimpatient，thattheysometimescursemeinJehovah\'sname。\'
\'That\'sdeucedgood，thatis！\'saidFascinationFledgeby。
\'Andatothertimestheysay，“Canitneverbedonewithoutthesetricks，MrRiah?Come，come，MrRiah，weknowtheartsofyourpeople“——mypeople！——“Ifthemoneyistobelent，fetchit，fetchit；
ifitisnottobelent，keepitandsayso。”Theyneverbelieveme。\'
\'THAT\'Sallright，\'saidFascinationFledgeby。
\'Theysay，“Weknow，MrRiah，weknow。Wehavebuttolookatyou，andweknow。”\'
\'Oh，agood\'unareyouforthepost，\'thoughtFledgeby，\'andagood\'unwasItomarkyououtforit！Imaybeslow，butIamprecioussure。\'
NotasyllableofthisreflectionshapeditselfinanyscrapofMrFledgeby\'sbreath，lestitshouldtendtoputhisservant\'spriceup。
Butlookingattheoldmanashestoodquietwithhisbeadbowedandhiseyescastdown，hefeltthattorelinquishaninchofhisbaldness，aninchofhisgreyhair，aninchofhiscoat-skirt，aninchofhishat-brim，aninchofhiswalking-staff，wouldbetorelinquishhundredsofpounds。
\'Lookhere，Riah，\'saidFledgeby，mollifiedbytheseself-approvingconsiderations。\'Iwanttogoalittlemoreintobuying-upqueerbills。Lookoutinthatdirection。\'
\'Sir，itshallbedone。\'
\'Castingmyeyeovertheaccounts，Ifindthatbranchofbusinesspaysprettyfairly，andIamgameforextendingit。Iliketoknowpeople\'saffairslikewise。Solookout。\'
\'Sir，Iwill，promptly。\'
\'Putitaboutintherightquarters，thatyou\'llbuyqueerbillsbythelump——bythepoundweightifthat\'sall——supposingyouseeyourwaytoafairchanceonlookingovertheparcel。Andthere\'sonethingmore。Cometomewiththebooksforperiodicalinspectionasusual，ateightonMondaymorning。\'
Riahdrewsomefoldingtabletsfromhisbreastandnoteditdown。
\'That\'sallIwantedtosayatthepresenttime，\'continuedFledgebyinagrudgingvein，ashegotoffthestool，\'exceptthatIwishyou\'dtaketheairwhereyoucanhearthebell，ortheknocker，eitheroneofthetwoorboth。By-the-byhowDOyoutaketheairatthetopofthehouse?Doyoustickyourheadoutofachimney-pot?\'
\'Sir，thereareleadsthere，andIhavemadealittlegardenthere。\'
\'Toburyyourmoneyin，youolddodger?\'
\'Athumbnail\'sspaceofgardenwouldholdthetreasureIbury，master，\'saidRiah。\'Twelveshillingsaweek，evenwhentheyareanoldman\'swages，burythemselves。\'
\'Ishouldliketoknowwhatyoureallyareworth，\'returnedFledgeby，withwhomhisgrowingrichonthatstipendandgratitudewasaveryconvenientfiction。\'Butcome！Let\'shavealookatyourgardenonthetiles，beforeIgo！\'
Theoldmantookastepback，andhesitated。
\'Truly，sir，Ihavecompanythere。\'
\'Haveyou，byGeorge！\'saidFledgeby；\'Isupposeyouhappentoknowwhosepremisestheseare?\'
\'Sir，theyareyours，andIamyourservantinthem。\'
\'Oh！Ithoughtyoumighthaveoverlookedthat，\'retortedFledgeby，withhiseyesonRiah\'sbeardashefeltforhisown；\'havingcompanyonmypremises，youknow！\'
\'Comeupandseetheguests，sir。Ihopeforyouradmissionthattheycandonoharm。\'
Passinghimwithacourteousreverence，speciallyunlikeanyactionthatMrFledgebycouldforhislifehaveimpartedtohisownheadandhands，theoldmanbegantoascendthestairs。Ashetoiledonbefore，withhispalmuponthestair-rail，andhislongblackskirt，averygaberdine，overhangingeachsuccessivestep，hemighthavebeentheleaderinsomepilgrimageofdevotionalascenttoaprophet\'stomb。Nottroubledbyanysuchweakimagining，FascinationFledgebymerelyspeculatedonthetimeoflifeatwhichhisbeardhadbegun，andthoughtoncemorewhatagood\'unhewasforthepart。
Somefinalwoodenstepsconductedthem，stoopingunderalowpenthouseroof，tothehouse-top。Riahstoodstill，and，turningtohismaster，pointedouthisguests。
LizzieHexamandJennyWren。Forwhom，perhapswithsomeoldinstinctofhisrace，thegentleJewhadspreadacarpet。Seatedonit，againstnomoreromanticobjectthanablackenedchimney-
stackoverwhichsomebumblecreeperhadbeentrained，theybothporedoveronebook；bothwithattentivefaces；Jennywiththesharper；Lizziewiththemoreperplexed。Anotherlittlebookortwowerelyingnear，andacommonbasketofcommonfruit，andanotherbasketfullofstringsofbeadsandtinselscraps。A
fewboxesofhumbleflowersandevergreenscompletedthegarden；andtheencompassingwildernessofdowageroldchimneystwirledtheircowlsandflutteredtheirsmoke，ratherasiftheywerebridling，andfanningthemselves，andlookingoninastateofairysurprise。
Takinghereyesoffthebook，totesthermemoryofsomethinginit，Lizziewasthefirsttoseeherselfobserved。Assherose，MissWrenlikewisebecameconscious，andsaid，irreverentlyaddressingthegreatchiefofthepremises:\'Whoeveryouare，I
can\'tgetup，becausemyback\'sbadandmylegsarequeer。\'
\'Thisismymaster，\'saidRiah，steppingforward。
\'Don\'tlooklikeanybody\'smaster，\'observedMissWrentoherself，withahitchofherchinandeyes。
\'This，sir，\'pursuedtheoldman，\'isalittledressmakerforlittlepeople。Explaintothemaster，Jenny。\'
\'Dolls；that\'sall，\'saidJenny，shortly。\'Verydifficulttofittoo，becausetheirfiguresaresouncertain。Youneverknowwheretoexpecttheirwaists。\'
\'Herfriend，\'resumedtheoldman，motioningtowardsLizzie；\'andasindustriousasvirtuous。Butthattheybothare。Theyarebusyearlyandlate，sir，earlyandlate；andinbye-times，asonthisholiday，theygotobook-learning。\'
\'Notmuchgoodtobegotoutofthat，\'remarkedFledgeby。
\'Dependsupontheperson！\'quothMissWren，snappinghimup。
\'Imadeacquaintancewithmyguests，sir，\'pursuedtheJew，withanevidentpurposeofdrawingoutthedressmaker，\'throughtheircomingheretobuyofourdamageandwasteforMissJenny\'smillinery。Ourwastegoesintothebestofcompany，sir，onherrosy-cheekedlittlecustomers。Theywearitintheirhair，andontheirball-dresses，andevensoshetellsmearepresentedatCourtwithit。\'
\'Ah！\'saidFledgeby，onwhoseintelligencethisdoll-fancymaderatherstrongdemands；\'she\'sbeenbuyingthatbasketfulto-day，I
suppose?\'
\'Isupposeshehas，\'MissJennyinterposed；\'andpayingforittoo，mostlikely！\'
\'Let\'shavealookatit，\'saidthesuspiciouschief。Riahhandedittohim。\'Howmuchforthisnow?\'
\'Twoprecioussilvershillings，\'saidMissWren。
Riahconfirmedherwithtwonods，asFledgebylookedtohim。A
nodforeachshilling。
\'Well，\'saidFledgeby，pokingintothecontentsofthebasketwithhisforefinger，\'thepriceisnotsobad。Youhavegotgoodmeasure，MissWhat-is-it。\'
\'TryJenny，\'suggestedthatyoungladywithgreatcalmness。
\'Youhavegotgoodmeasure，MissJenny；butthepriceisnotsobad——Andyou，\'saidFledgeby，turningtotheothervisitor，\'doyoubuyanythinghere，miss?\'
\'No，sir。\'
\'Norsellanythingneither，miss?\'
\'No，sir。\'
Lookingaskewatthequestioner，Jennystoleherhanduptoherfriend\'s，anddrewherfrienddown，sothatshebentbesideheronherknee。
\'Wearethankfultocomehereforrest，sir，\'saidJenny。\'Yousee，youdon\'tknowwhattherestofthisplaceistous；doeshe，Lizzie?It\'sthequiet，andtheair。\'
\'Thequiet！\'repeatedFledgeby，withacontemptuousturnofhisheadtowardstheCity\'sroar。\'Andtheair！\'witha\'Poof！\'atthesmoke。
\'Ah！\'saidJenny。\'Butit\'ssohigh。Andyouseethecloudsrushingonabovethenarrowstreets，notmindingthem，andyouseethegoldenarrowspointingatthemountainsintheskyfromwhichthewindcomes，andyoufeelasifyouweredead。\'
Thelittlecreaturelookedaboveher，holdingupherslighttransparenthand。
\'Howdoyoufeelwhenyouaredead?\'askedFledgeby，muchperplexed。
\'Oh，sotranquil！\'criedthelittlecreature，smiling。\'Oh，sopeacefulandsothankful！Andyouhearthepeoplewhoarealive，crying，andworking，andcallingtooneanotherdownintheclosedarkstreets，andyouseemtopitythemso！Andsuchachainhasfallenfromyou，andsuchastrangegoodsorrowfulhappinesscomesuponyou！\'
Hereyesfellontheoldman，who，withhishandsfolded，quietlylookedon。
\'Whyitwasonlyjustnow，\'saidthelittlecreature，pointingathim，\'thatIfanciedIsawhimcomeoutofhisgrave！Hetoiledoutatthatlowdoorsobentandworn，andthenhetookhisbreathandstoodupright，andlookedallroundhimatthesky，andthewindblewuponhim，andhislifedowninthedarkwasover！——Tillhewascalledbacktolife，\'sheadded，lookingroundatFledgebywiththatlowerlookofsharpness。\'Whydidyoucallhimback?\'
\'Hewaslongenoughcoming，anyhow，\'grumbledFledgeby。
\'Butyouarenotdead，youknow，\'saidJennyWren。\'Getdowntolife！\'
MrFledgebyseemedtothinkitratheragoodsuggestion，andwithanodturnedround。AsRiahfollowedtoattendhimdownthestairs，thelittlecreaturecalledouttotheJewinasilverytone，\'Don\'tbelonggone。Comeback，andbedead！\'Andstillastheywentdowntheyheardthelittlesweetvoice，moreandmorefaintly，halfcallingandhalfsinging，\'Comebackandbedead，Comebackandbedead！\'
Whentheygotdownintotheentry，Fledgeby，pausingundertheshadowofthebroadoldhat，andmechanicallypoisingthestaff，saidtotheoldman:
\'That\'sahandsomegirl，thatoneinhersenses。\'
\'Andasgoodashandsome，\'answeredRiah。
\'Atallevents，\'observedFledgeby，withadrywhistle，\'Ihopesheain\'tbadenoughtoputanychapuptothefastenings，andgetthepremisesbrokenopen。Youlookout。Keepyourweathereyeawakeanddon\'tmakeanymoreacquaintances，howeverhandsome。Ofcourseyoualwayskeepmynametoyourself?\'
\'Sir，assuredlyIdo。\'
\'Iftheyaskit，sayit\'sPubsey，orsayit\'sCo，orsayit\'sanythingyoulike，butwhatitis。\'
Hisgratefulservant——inwhoseracegratitudeisdeep，strong，andenduring——bowedhishead，andactuallydidnowputthehemofhiscoattohislips:thoughsolightlythatthewearerknewnothingofit。
Thus，FascinationFledgebywenthisway，exultingintheartfulclevernesswithwhichhehadturnedhisthumbdownonaJew，andtheoldmanwenthisdifferentwayup-stairs。Ashemounted，thecallorsongbegantosoundinhisearsagain，and，lookingabove，hesawthefaceofthelittlecreaturelookingdownoutofaGloryofherlongbrightradianthair，andmusicallyrepeatingtohim，likeavision:
\'Comeupandbedead！Comeupandbedead！\'
Chapter6
ARIDDLEWITHOUTANANSWER
AgainMrMortimerLightwoodandMrEugeneWrayburnsattogetherintheTemple。Thisevening，however，theywerenottogetherintheplaceofbusinessoftheeminentsolicitor，butinanotherdismalsetofchambersfacingitonthesamesecond-floor；
onwhosedungeon-likeblackouter-doorappearedthelegend:
PRIVATE
MREUGENEWRAYBURN
MRMORTIMERLIGHTWOOD
MrLightwood\'sOfficesopposite。
Appearancesindicatedthatthisestablishmentwasaveryrecentinstitution。Thewhitelettersoftheinscriptionwereextremelywhiteandextremelystrongtothesenseofsmell，thecomplexionofthetablesandchairswaslikeLadyTippins\'salittletoobloomingtobebelievedin，andthecarpetsandfloorclothseemedtorushatthebeholder\'sfaceintheunusualprominencyoftheirpatterns。ButtheTemple，accustomedtotonedownboththestilllifeandthehumanlifethathasmuchtodowithit，wouldsoongetthebetterofallthat。
\'Well！\'saidEugene，ononesideofthefire，\'Ifeeltolerablycomfortable。Ihopetheupholsterermaydothesame。\'
\'Whyshouldn\'the?\'askedLightwood，fromtheothersideofthefire。
\'Tobesure，\'pursuedEugene，reflecting，\'heisnotinthesecretofourpecuniaryaffairs，soperhapshemaybeinaneasyframeofmind。\'
\'Weshallpayhim，\'saidMortimer。
\'Shallwe，really?\'returnedEugene，indolentlysurprised。\'Youdon\'tsayso！\'
\'Imeantopayhim，Eugene，formypart，\'saidMortimer，inaslightlyinjuredtone。
\'Ah！Imeantopayhimtoo，\'retortedEugene。\'ButthenImeansomuchthatI——thatIdon\'tmean。\'
\'Don\'tmean?\'
\'SomuchthatIonlymeanandshallalwaysonlymeanandnothingmore，mydearMortimer。It\'sthesamething。\'
Hisfriend，lyingbackinhiseasychair，watchedhimlyingbackinhiseasychair，ashestretchedouthislegsonthehearth-rug，andsaid，withtheamusedlookthatEugeneWrayburncouldalwaysawakeninhimwithoutseemingtotryorcare:
\'Anyhow，yourvagarieshaveincreasedthebill。\'
\'Callsthedomesticvirtuesvagaries！\'exclaimedEugene，raisinghiseyestotheceiling。
\'Thisverycompletelittlekitchenofours，\'saidMortimer，\'inwhichnothingwilleverbecooked——\'
\'Mydear，dearMortimer，\'returnedhisfriend，lazilyliftinghisheadalittletolookathim，\'howoftenhaveIpointedouttoyouthatitsmoralinfluenceistheimportantthing?\'
\'Itsmoralinfluenceonthisfellow！\'exclaimedLightwood，laughing。
\'Domethefavour，\'saidEugene，gettingoutofhischairwithmuchgravity，\'tocomeandinspectthatfeatureofourestablishmentwhichyourashlydisparage。\'Withthat，takingupacandle，heconductedhischumintothefourthroomofthesetofchambers——alittlenarrowroom——whichwasverycompletelyandneatlyfittedasakitchen。\'See！\'saidEugene，\'miniatureflour-barrel，rolling-
pin，spice-box，shelfofbrownjars，chopping-board，coffee-mill，dresserelegantlyfurnishedwithcrockery，saucepansandpans，roastingjack，acharmingkettle，anarmouryofdish-covers。Themoralinfluenceoftheseobjects，informingthedomesticvirtues，mayhaveanimmenseinfluenceuponme；notuponyou，foryouareahopelesscase，butuponme。Infact，IhaveanideathatI
feelthedomesticvirtuesalreadyforming。Domethefavourtostepintomybedroom。Secretaire，yousee，andabstrusesetofsolidmahoganypigeon-holes，oneforeveryletterofthealphabet。
TowhatusedoIdevotethem?Ireceiveabill——sayfromJones。I
docketitneatlyatthesecretaire，JONES，andIputitintopigeonholeJ。It\'sthenextthingtoareceiptandisquiteassatisfactorytoME。AndIverymuchwish，Mortimer，\'sittingonhisbed，withtheairofaphilosopherlecturingadisciple，\'thatmyexamplemightinduceYOUtocultivatehabitsofpunctualityandmethod；and，bymeansofthemoralinfluenceswithwhichIhavesurroundedyou，toencouragetheformationofthedomesticvirtues。\'
Mortimerlaughedagain，withhisusualcommentariesof\'HowCANyoubesoridiculous，Eugene！\'and\'Whatanabsurdfellowyouare！\'butwhenhislaughwasout，therewassomethingserious，ifnotanxious，inhisface。Despitethatperniciousassumptionoflassitudeandindifference，whichhadbecomehissecondnature，hewasstronglyattachedtohisfriend。HehadfoundedhimselfuponEugenewhentheywereyetboysatschool；andatthishourimitatedhimnoless，admiredhimnoless，lovedhimnoless，thaninthosedeparteddays。
\'Eugene，\'saidhe，\'ifIcouldfindyouinearnestforaminute，I
wouldtrytosayanearnestwordtoyou。\'
\'Anearnestword?\'repeatedEugene。\'Themoralinfluencesarebeginningtowork。Sayon。\'
\'Well，Iwill，\'returnedtheother，\'thoughyouarenotearnestyet。\'
\'Inthisdesireforearnestness，\'murmuredEugene，withtheairofonewhowasmeditatingdeeply，\'Itracethehappyinfluencesofthelittleflour-barrelandthecoffee-mill。Gratifying。\'
\'Eugene，\'resumedMortimer，disregardingthelightinterruption，andlayingahanduponEugene\'sshoulder，ashe，Mortimer，stoodbeforehimseatedonhisbed，\'youarewithholdingsomethingfromme。\'