CHAPTERXLIX
WHICHTREATSOFTHESHREWDCONVERSATIONWHICHSANCHOPANZAHELDWITH
HISMASTERDONQUIXOTE
“AHA，Ihavecaughtyou，“saidSancho；“thisiswhatinmyheartandsoulIwaslongingtoknow。Comenow，senor，canyoudenywhatiscommonlysaidaroundus，whenapersonisoutofhumour，\'Idon\'tknowwhatailsso-and-so，thatheneithereats，nordrinks，norsleeps，norgivesaproperanswertoanyquestion；onewouldthinkhewasenchanted\'？Fromwhichitistobegatheredthatthosewhodonoteat，ordrink，orsleep，ordoanyofthenaturalactsIamspeakingof-
thatsuchpersonsareenchanted；butnotthosethathavethedesireyourworshiphas，anddrinkwhendrinkisgiventhem，andeatwhenthereisanythingtoeat，andanswereveryquestionthatisaskedthem。“
“Whatthousayestistrue，Sancho，“repliedDonQuixote；“butIhavealreadytoldtheetherearemanysortsofenchantments，anditmaybethatinthecourseoftimetheyhavebeenchangedoneforanother，andthatnowitmaybethewaywithenchantedpeopletodoallthatIdo，thoughtheydidnotdosobefore；soitisvaintoargueordrawinferencesagainsttheusageofthetime。IknowandfeelthatIamenchanted，andthatisenoughtoeasemyconscience；
foritwouldweighheavilyonitifIthoughtthatIwasnotenchanted，andthatinaaint-heartedandcowardlywayIallowedmyselftolieinthiscage，defraudingmultitudesofthesuccourI
mightaffordtothoseinneedanddistress，whoatthisverymomentmaybeinsorewantofmyaidandprotection。“
“Stillforallthat，“repliedSancho，“Isaythat，foryourgreaterandfullersatisfaction，itwouldbewellifyourworshipweretotrytogetoutofthisprisonandIpromisetodoallinmypowertohelp，andeventotakeyououtofit，andseeifyoucouldoncemoremountyourgoodRocinante，whoseemstobeenchantedtoo，heissomelancholyanddejected；andthenwemighttryourchanceinlookingforadventuresagain；andifwehavenolucktherewillbetimeenoughtogobacktothecage；inwhich，onthefaithofagoodandloyalsquire，Ipromisetoshutmyselfupalongwithyourworship，ifsobeyouaresounfortunate，orIsostupid，asnottobeabletocarryoutmyplan。“
“Iamcontenttodoasthousayest，brotherSancho，“saidDonQuixote，“andwhenthouseestanopportunityforeffectingmyreleaseIwillobeytheeabsolutely；butthouwiltsee，Sancho，howmistakenthouartinthyconceptionofmymisfortune。“
Theknight-errantandtheill-errantsquirekeptuptheirconversationtilltheyreachedtheplacewherethecurate，thecanon，andthebarber，whohadalreadydismounted，werewaitingforthem。Thecarteratonceunyokedtheoxenandleftthemtoroamatlargeaboutthepleasantgreenspot，thefreshnessofwhichseemedtoinvite，notenchantedpeoplelikeDonQuixote，butwide-awake，sensiblefolklikehissquire，whobeggedthecuratetoallowhismastertoleavethecageforalittle；foriftheydidnotlethimout，theprisonmightnotbeascleanastheproprietyofsuchagentlemanashismasterrequired。Thecurateunderstoodhim，andsaidhewouldverygladlycomplywithhisrequest，onlythathefearedhismaster，findinghimselfatliberty，wouldtaketohisoldcoursesandmakeoffwherenobodycouldeverfindhimagain。
“Iwillanswerforhisnotrunningaway，“saidSancho。
“AndIalso，“saidthecanon，“especiallyifhegivesmehiswordasaknightnottoleaveuswithoutourconsent。“
DonQuixote，whowaslisteningtoallthis，said，“Igiveit；-
moreoveronewhoisenchantedasIamcannotdoashelikeswithhimself；forhewhohadenchantedhimcouldpreventhismovingfromoneplaceforthreeages，andifheattemptedtoescapewouldbringhimbackflying。“-Andthatbeingso，theymightaswellreleasehim，particularlyasitwouldbetotheadvantageofall；for，iftheydidnotlethimout，heprotestedhewouldbeunabletoavoidoffendingtheirnostrilsunlesstheykepttheirdistance。
Thecanontookhishand，tiedtogetherastheybothwere，andonhiswordandpromisetheyunboundhim，andrejoicedbeyondmeasurehewastofindhimselfoutofthecage。Thefirstthinghedidwastostretchhimselfallover，andthenhewenttowhereRocinantewasstandingandgivinghimacoupleofslapsonthehaunchessaid，“I
stilltrustinGodandinhisblessedmother，Oflowerandmirrorofsteeds，thatweshallsoonseeourselves，bothofus，aswewishtobe，thouwiththymasteronthyback，andImounteduponthee，followingthecallingforwhichGodsentmeintotheworld。“Andsosaying，accompaniedbySancho，hewithdrewtoaretiredspot，fromwhichhecamebackmuchrelievedandmoreeagerthanevertoputhissquire\'sschemeintoexecution。
Thecanongazedathim，wonderingattheextraordinarynatureofhismadness，andthatinallhisremarksandrepliesheshouldshowsuchexcellentsense，andonlylosehisstirrups，ashasbeenalreadysaid，whenthesubjectofchivalrywasbroached。Andso，movedbycompassion，hesaidtohim，astheyallsatonthegreengrassawaitingthearrivaloftheprovisions：
“Isitpossible，gentlesir，thatthenauseousandidlereadingofbooksofchivalrycanhavehadsuchaneffectonyourworshipastoupsetyourreasonsothatyoufancyyourselfenchanted，andthelike，allasfarfromthetruthasfalsehooditselfis？HowcantherebeanyhumanunderstandingthatcanpersuadeitselfthereeverwasallthatinfinityofAmadisesintheworld，orallthatmultitudeoffamousknights，allthoseemperorsofTrebizond，allthoseFelixmartesofHircania，allthosepalfreys，anddamsels-errant，andserpents，andmonsters，andgiants，andmarvellousadventures，andenchantmentsofeverykind，andbattles，andprodigiousencounters，splendidcostumes，love-sickprincesses，squiresmadecounts，drolldwarfs，loveletters，billingsandcooings，swashbucklerwomen，and，inaword，allthatnonsensethebooksofchivalrycontain？Formyself，IcanonlysaythatwhenIreadthem，solongasIdonotstoptothinkthattheyareallliesandfrivolity，theygivemeacertainamountofpleasure；butwhenIcometoconsiderwhattheyare，Iflingtheverybestofthematthewall，andwouldflingitintothefireiftherewereoneathand，asrichlydeservingsuchpunishmentascheatsandimpostorsoutoftherangeofordinarytoleration，andasfoundersofnewsectsandmodesoflife，andteachersthatleadtheignorantpublictobelieveandacceptastruthallthefollytheycontain。Andsuchistheiraudacity，theyevendaretounsettlethewitsofgentlemenofbirthandintelligence，asisshownplainlybythewaytheyhaveservedyourworship，whentheyhavebroughtyoutosuchapassthatyouhavetobeshutupinacageandcarriedonanox-cartasonewouldcarryalionoratigerfromplacetoplacetomakemoneybyshowingit。Come，SenorDonQuixote，havesomecompassionforyourself，returntothebosomofcommonsense，andmakeuseoftheliberalshareofitthatheavenhasbeenpleasedtobestowuponyou，employingyourabundantgiftsofmindinsomeotherreadingthatmayservetobenefityourconscienceandaddtoyourhonour。Andif，stillledawaybyyournaturalbent，youdesiretoreadbooksofachievementsandofchivalry，readtheBookofJudgesintheHolyScriptures，forthereyouwillfindgrandreality，anddeedsastrueastheyareheroic。LusitaniahadaViriatus，RomeaCaesar，CarthageaHannibal，GreeceanAlexander，CastileaCountFernanGonzalez，ValenciaaCid，AndalusiaaGonzaloFernandez，EstremaduraaDiegoGarciadeParedes，JerezaGarciPerezdeVargas，ToledoaGarcilaso，SevilleaDonManueldeLeon，toreadofwhosevaliantdeedswillentertainandinstructtheloftiestmindsandfillthemwithdelightandwonder。Here，SenorDonQuixote，willbereadingworthyofyoursoundunderstanding；fromwhichyouwillriselearnedinhistory，inlovewithvirtue，strengthenedingoodness，improvedinmanners，bravewithoutrashness，prudentwithoutcowardice；andalltothehonourofGod，yourownadvantageandthegloryofLaMancha，whence，Iaminformed，yourworshipderivesyourbirth。“
DonQuixotelistenedwiththegreatestattentiontothecanon\'swords，andwhenhefoundhehadfinished，afterregardinghimforsometime，herepliedtohim：
“Itappearstome，gentlesir，thatyourworship\'sdiscourseisintendedtopersuademethatthereneverwereanyknights-errantintheworld，andthatallthebooksofchivalryarefalse，lying，mischievousanduselesstotheState，andthatIhavedonewronginreadingthem，andworseinbelievingthem，andstillworseinimitatingthem，whenIundertooktofollowthearduouscallingofknight-errantrywhichtheysetforth；foryoudenythatthereeverwereAmadisesofGaulorofGreece，oranyotheroftheknightsofwhomthebooksarefull。“
“Itisallexactlyasyoustateit，“saidthecanon；towhichDonQuixotereturned，“Youalsowentontosaythatbooksofthiskindhaddonememuchharm，inasmuchastheyhadupsetmysenses，andshutmeupinacage，andthatitwouldbebetterformetoreformandchangemystudies，andreadothertruerbookswhichwouldaffordmorepleasureandinstruction。“
“Justso，“saidthecanon。
“Wellthen，“returnedDonQuixote，“tomyminditisyouwhoaretheonethatisoutofhiswitsandenchanted，asyouhaveventuredtouttersuchblasphemiesagainstathingsouniversallyacknowledgedandacceptedastruethatwhoeverdeniesit，asyoudo，deservesthesamepunishmentwhichyousayyouinflictonthebooksthatirritateyouwhenyoureadthem。FortotrytopersuadeanybodythatAmadis，andalltheotherknights-adventurerswithwhomthebooksarefilled，neverexisted，wouldbeliketryingtopersuadehimthatthesundoesnotyieldlight，oricecold，orearthnourishment。WhatwitintheworldcanpersuadeanotherthatthestoryofthePrincessFloripesandGuyofBurgundyisnottrue，orthatofFierabrasandthebridgeofMantible，whichhappenedinthetimeofCharlemagne？Forbyallthatisgooditisastrueasthatitisdaylightnow；andifitbealie，itmustbealietoothattherewasaHector，orAchilles，orTrojanwar，orTwelvePeersofFrance，orArthurofEngland，whostillliveschangedintoaraven，andisunceasinglylookedforinhiskingdom。OnemightjustaswelltrytomakeoutthatthehistoryofGuarinoMezquino，orofthequestoftheHolyGrail，isfalse，orthatthelovesofTristramandtheQueenYseultareapocryphal，aswellasthoseofGuinevereandLancelot，whentherearepersonswhocanalmostrememberhavingseentheDameQuintanona，whowasthebestcupbearerinGreatBritain。Andsotrueisthis，thatI
recollectagrandmotherofmineonthefather\'sside，whenevershesawanydameinavenerablehood，usedtosaytome，\'Grandson，thatoneislikeDameQuintanona，\'fromwhichIconcludethatshemusthaveknownher，oratleasthadmanagedtoseesomeportraitofher。ThenwhocandenythatthestoryofPierresandthefairMagalonaistrue，wheneventothisdaymaybeseenintheking\'sarmourythepinwithwhichthevaliantPierresguidedthewoodenhorseherodethroughtheair，anditisatriflebiggerthanthepoleofacart？
AndalongsideofthepinisBabieca\'ssaddle，andatRoncesvallesthereisRoland\'shorn，aslargeasalargebeam；whencewemayinferthattherewereTwelvePeers，andaPierres，andaCid，andotherknightslikethem，ofthesortpeoplecommonlycalladventurers。
OrperhapsIshallbetold，too，thattherewasnosuchknight-errantasthevaliantLusitanianJuandeMerlo，whowenttoBurgundyandinthecityofArrasfoughtwiththefamouslordofCharny，MosenPierresbyname，andafterwardsinthecityofBaslewithMosenEnriquedeRemesten，comingoutofbothencounterscoveredwithfameandhonour；oradventuresandchallengesachievedanddelivered，alsoinBurgundy，bythevaliantSpaniardsPedroBarbaandGutierreQuixadaofwhosefamilyIcomeinthedirectmaleline，whentheyvanquishedthesonsoftheCountofSanPolo。
Ishallbetold，too，thatDonFernandodeGuevaradidnotgoinquestofadventurestoGermany，whereheengagedincombatwithMicerGeorge，aknightofthehouseoftheDukeofAustria。IshallbetoldthatthejoustsofSuerodeQuinones，himofthe\'Paso，\'andtheempriseofMosenLuisdeFalcesagainsttheCastilianknight，DonGonzalodeGuzman，weremeremockeries；aswellasmanyotherachievementsofChristianknightsoftheseandforeignrealms，whicharesoauthenticandtrue，that，Irepeat，hewhodeniesthemmustbetotallywantinginreasonandgoodsense。“
ThecanonwasamazedtohearthemedleyoftruthandfictionDonQuixoteuttered，andtoseehowwellacquaintedhewaswitheverythingrelatingorbelongingtotheachievementsofhisknight-errantry；sohesaidinreply：
“Icannotdeny，SenorDonQuixote，thatthereissometruthinwhatyousay，especiallyasregardstheSpanishknights-errant；andIamwillingtogranttoothattheTwelvePeersofFranceexisted，butIamnotdisposedtobelievethattheydidallthethingsthattheArchbishopTurpinrelatesofthem。ForthetruthofthematteristheywereknightschosenbythekingsofFrance，andcalled\'Peers\'becausetheywereallequalinworth，rankandprowessatleastiftheywerenottheyoughttohavebeen，anditwasakindofreligiousorderlikethoseofSantiagoandCalatravainthepresentday，inwhichitisassumedthatthosewhotakeitarevaliantknightsofdistinctionandgoodbirth；andjustaswesaynowaKnightofSt。
John，orofAlcantara，theyusedtosaythenaKnightoftheTwelvePeers，becausetwelveequalswerechosenforthatmilitaryorder。ThattherewasaCid，aswellasaBernardodelCarpio，therecanbenodoubt；butthattheydidthedeedspeoplesaytheydid，Iholdtobeverydoubtful。InthatothermatterofthepinofCountPierresthatyouspeakof，andsayisnearBabieca\'ssaddleintheArmoury，I
confessmysin；forIameithersostupidorsoshort-sighted，that，thoughIhaveseenthesaddle，Ihaveneverbeenabletoseethepin，inspiteofitbeingasbigasyourworshipsaysitis。“
“Forallthatitisthere，withoutanymannerofdoubt，“saidDonQuixote；“andmorebytokentheysayitisinclosedinasheathofcowhidetokeepitfromrusting。“
“Allthatmaybe，“repliedthecanon；“but，bytheordersIhavereceived，Idonotrememberseeingit。However，grantingitisthere，thatisnoreasonwhyIamboundtobelievethestoriesofallthoseAmadisesandofallthatmultitudeofknightstheytellusabout，norisitreasonablethatamanlikeyourworship，soworthy，andwithsomanygoodqualities，andendowedwithsuchagoodunderstanding，shouldallowhimselftobepersuadedthatsuchwildcrazythingsasarewritteninthoseabsurdbooksofchivalryarereallytrue。“
CHAPTERL
OFTHESHREWDCONTROVERSYWHICHDONQUIXOTEANDTHECANONHELD，TOGETHERWITHOTHERINCIDENTS
“AGOODjoke，that！”returnedDonQuixote。“Booksthathavebeenprintedwiththeking\'slicence，andwiththeapprobationofthosetowhomtheyhavebeensubmitted，andreadwithuniversaldelight，andextolledbygreatandsmall，richandpoor，learnedandignorant，gentleandsimple，inawordbypeopleofeverysort，ofwhateverrankorconditiontheymaybe-thattheseshouldbelies！Andaboveallwhentheycarrysuchanappearanceoftruthwiththem；fortheytellusthefather，mother，country，kindred，age，place，andtheachievements，stepbystep，anddaybyday，performedbysuchaknightorknights！Hush，sir；utternotsuchblasphemy；trustmeIamadvisingyounowtoactasasensiblemanshould；onlyreadthem，andyouwillseethepleasureyouwillderivefromthem。For，come，tellme，cantherebeanythingmoredelightfulthantosee，asitwere，herenowdisplayedbeforeusavastlakeofbubblingpitchwithahostofsnakesandserpentsandlizards，andferociousandterriblecreaturesofallsortsswimmingaboutinit，whilefromthemiddleofthelaketherecomesaplaintivevoicesaying：\'Knight，whosoeverthouartwhobeholdestthisdreadlake，ifthouwouldstwintheprizethatlieshiddenbeneaththeseduskywaves，provethevalourofthystoutheartandcastthyselfintothemidstofitsdarkburningwaters，elsethoushaltnotbeworthytoseethemightywonderscontainedinthesevencastlesofthesevenFaysthatliebeneaththisblackexpanse；\'andthentheknight，almosteretheawfulvoicehasceased，withoutstoppingtoconsider，withoutpausingtoreflectuponthedangertowhichheisexposinghimself，withoutevenrelievinghimselfoftheweightofhismassivearmour，commendinghimselftoGodandtohislady，plungesintothemidstoftheboilinglake，andwhenhelittlelooksforit，orknowswhathisfateistobe，hefindshimselfamongflowerymeadows，withwhichtheElysianfieldsarenottobecompared。Theskyseemsmoretransparentthere，andthesunshineswithastrangebrilliancy，andadelightfulgroveofgreenleafytreespresentsitselftotheeyesandcharmsthesightwithitsverdure，whiletheearissoothedbythesweetuntutoredmelodyofthecountlessbirdsofgayplumagethatflittoandfroamongtheinterlacingbranches。Hereheseesabrookwhoselimpidwaters，likeliquidcrystal，rippleoverfinesandsandwhitepebblesthatlooklikesiftedgoldandpurestpearls。Thereheperceivesacunninglywroughtfountainofmany-colouredjasperandpolishedmarble；hereanotherofrusticfashionwherethelittlemussel-shellsandthespiralwhiteandyellowmansionsofthesnaildisposedinstudiousdisorder，mingledwithfragmentsofglitteringcrystalandmockemeralds，makeupaworkofvariedaspect，whereart，imitatingnature，seemstohaveoutdoneit。Suddenlythereispresentedtohissightastrongcastleorgorgeouspalacewithwallsofmassygold，turretsofdiamondandgatesofjacinth；inshort，somarvellousisitsstructurethatthoughthematerialsofwhichitisbuiltarenothinglessthandiamonds，carbuncles，rubies，pearls，gold，andemeralds，theworkmanshipisstillmorerare。Andafterhavingseenallthis，whatcanbemorecharmingthantoseehowabevyofdamselscomesforthfromthegateofthecastleingayandgorgeousattire，suchthat，wereItosetmyselfnowtodepictitasthehistoriesdescribeittous，Ishouldneverhavedone；andthenhowshewhoseemstobethefirstamongthemalltakestheboldknightwhoplungedintotheboilinglakebythehand，andwithoutaddressingawordtohimleadshimintotherichpalaceorcastle，andstripshimasnakedaswhenhismotherborehim，andbatheshiminlukewarmwater，andanointshimalloverwithsweet-smellingunguents，andclotheshiminashirtofthesoftestsendal，allscentedandperfumed，whileanotherdamselcomesandthrowsoverhisshouldersamantlewhichissaidtobeworthattheveryleastacity，andevenmore？Howcharmingitis，then，whentheytellushow，afterallthis，theyleadhimtoanotherchamberwherehefindsthetablessetoutinsuchstylethatheisfilledwithamazementandwonder；toseehowtheypouroutwaterforhishandsdistilledfromamberandsweet-scentedflowers；howtheyseathimonanivorychair；toseehowthedamselswaitonhimallinprofoundsilence；howtheybringhimsuchavarietyofdaintiessotemptinglypreparedthattheappetiteisatalosswhichtoselect；tohearthemusicthatresoundswhileheisattable，bywhomorwhenceproducedheknowsnot。Andthenwhentherepastisoverandthetablesremoved，fortheknighttoreclineinthechair，pickinghisteethperhapsasusual，andadamsel，muchlovelierthananyoftheothers，toenterunexpectedlybythechamberdoor，andherselfbyhisside，andbegintotellhimwhatthecastleis，andhowsheisheldenchantedthere，andotherthingsthatamazetheknightandastonishthereaderswhoareperusinghishistory。ButIwillnotexpatiateanyfurtheruponthis，asitmaybegatheredfromitthatwhateverpartofwhateverhistoryofaknight-errantonereads，itwillfillthereader，whoeverhebe，withdelightandwonder；andtakemyadvice，sir，and，asIsaidbefore，readthesebooksandyouwillseehowtheywillbanishanymelancholyyoumayfeelandraiseyourspiritsshouldtheybedepressed。FormyselfIcansaythatsinceIhavebeenaknight-errantIhavebecomevaliant，polite，generous，well-bred，magnanimous，courteous，dauntless，gentle，patient，andhavelearnedtobearhardships，imprisonments，andenchantments；andthoughitbesuchashorttimesinceIhaveseenmyselfshutupinacagelikeamadman，I
hopebythemightofmyarm，ifheavenaidmeandfortunethwartmenot，toseemyselfkingofsomekingdomwhereImaybeabletoshowthegratitudeandgenerositythatdwellinmyheart；forbymyfaith，senor，thepoormanisincapacitatedfromshowingthevirtueofgenerositytoanyone，thoughhemaypossessitinthehighestdegree；andgratitudethatconsistsofdispositiononlyisadeadthing，justasfaithwithoutworksisdead。ForthisreasonIshouldbegladwerefortunesoontooffermesomeopportunityofmakingmyselfanemperor，soastoshowmyheartindoinggoodtomyfriends，particularlytothispoorSanchoPanza，mysquire，whoisthebestfellowintheworld；andIwouldgladlygivehimacountyIhavepromisedhimthiseversolong，onlythatIamafraidhehasnotthecapacitytogovernhisrealm。“
Sanchopartlyheardtheselastwordsofhismaster，andsaidtohim，“Strivehardyou，SenorDonQuixote，togivemethatcountysooftenpromisedbyyouandsolonglookedforbyme，forIpromiseyoutherewillbenowantofcapacityinmetogovernit；andevenifthereis，Ihaveheardsaytherearemenintheworldwhofarmseigniories，payingsomuchayear，andtheythemselvestakingchargeofthegovernment，whilethelord，withhislegsstretchedout，enjoystherevenuetheypayhim，withouttroublinghimselfaboutanythingelse。That\'swhatI\'lldo，andnotstandhagglingovertrifles，butwashmyhandsatonceofthewholebusiness，andenjoymyrentslikeaduke，andletthingsgotheirownway。“
“That，brotherSancho，“saidthecanon，“onlyholdsgoodasfarastheenjoymentoftherevenuegoes；butthelordoftheseigniorymustattendtotheadministrationofjustice，andherecapacityandsoundjudgmentcomein，andaboveallafirmdeterminationtofindoutthetruth；forifthisbewantinginthebeginning，themiddleandtheendwillalwaysgowrong；andGodascommonlyaidsthehonestintentionsofthesimpleashefrustratestheevildesignsofthecrafty。“
“Idon\'tunderstandthosephilosophies，“returnedSanchoPanza；“allIknowisIwouldIhadthecountyassoonasIshallknowhowtogovernit；forIhaveasmuchsoulasanother，andasmuchbodyasanyone，andIshallbeasmuchkingofmyrealmasanyotherofhis；
andbeingsoIshoulddoasIliked，anddoingasIlikedIshouldpleasemyself，andpleasingmyselfIshouldbecontent，andwhenoneiscontenthehasnothingmoretodesire，andwhenonehasnothingmoretodesirethereisanendofit；soletthecountycome，andGodhewithyou，andletusseeoneanother，asoneblindmansaidtotheother。“
“Thatisnotbadphilosophythouarttalking，Sancho，“saidthecanon；“butforallthatthereisagooddealtobesaidonthismatterofcounties。“
TowhichDonQuixotereturned，“Iknownotwhatmorethereistobesaid；IonlyguidemyselfbytheexamplesetmebythegreatAmadisofGaul，whenhemadehissquirecountoftheInsulaFirme；andso，withoutanyscruplesofconscience，IcanmakeacountofSanchoPanza，forheisoneofthebestsquiresthateverknight-erranthad。“
ThecanonwasastonishedatthemethodicalnonsenseifnonsensebecapableofmethodthatDonQuixoteuttered，atthewayinwhichhehaddescribedtheadventureoftheknightofthelake，attheimpressionthatthedeliberateliesofthebookshereadhadmadeuponhim，andlastlyhemarvelledatthesimplicityofSancho，whodesiredsoeagerlytoobtainthecountyhismasterhadpromisedhim。
Bythistimethecanon\'sservants，whohadgonetotheinntofetchthesumptermule，hadreturned，andmakingacarpetandthegreengrassofthemeadowserveasatable，theyseatedthemselvesintheshadeofsometreesandmadetheirrepastthere，thatthecartermightnotbedeprivedoftheadvantageofthespot，ashasbeenalreadysaid。Astheywereeatingtheysuddenlyheardaloudnoiseandthesoundofabellthatseemedtocomefromamongsomebramblesandthickbushesthatwerecloseby，andthesameinstanttheyobservedabeautifulgoat，spottedalloverblack，white，andbrown，springoutofthethicketwithagoatherdafterit，callingtoitandutteringtheusualcriestomakeitstoporturnbacktothefold。Thefugitivegoat，scaredandfrightened，rantowardsthecompanyasifseekingtheirprotectionandthenstoodstill，andthegoatherdcomingupseizeditbythehornsandbegantotalktoitasifitwerepossessedofreasonandunderstanding：“Ahwanderer，wanderer，Spotty，Spotty；
howhaveyougonelimpingallthistime？Whatwolveshavefrightenedyou，mydaughter？Won\'tyoutellmewhatisthematter，mybeauty？Butwhatelsecanitbeexceptthatyouareashe，andcannotkeepquiet？Aplagueonyourhumoursandthehumoursofthoseyoutakeafter！Comeback，comeback，mydarling；andifyouwillnotbesohappy，atanyrateyouwillbesafeinthefoldorwithyourcompanions；forifyouwhooughttokeepandleadthem，gowanderingastray，whatwillbecomeofthem？”
Thegoatherd\'stalkamusedallwhoheardit，butespeciallythecanon，whosaidtohim，“Asyoulive，brother，takeiteasy，andbenotinsuchahurrytodrivethisgoatbacktothefold；for，beingafemale，asyousay，shewillfollowhernaturalinstinctinspiteofallyoucandotopreventit。Takethismorselanddrinkasup，andthatwillsootheyourirritation，andinthemeantimethegoatwillrestherself，“andsosaying，hehandedhimtheloinsofacoldrabbitonafork。
Thegoatherdtookitwiththanks，anddrankandcalmedhimself，andthensaid，“IshouldbesorryifyourworshipsweretotakemeforasimpletonforhavingspokensoseriouslyasIdidtothisanimal；
butthetruthisthereisacertainmysteryinthewordsIused。I
amaclown，butnotsomuchofonebutthatIknowhowtobehavetomenandtobeasts。“
“ThatIcanwellbelieve，“saidthecurate，“forIknowalreadybyexperiencethatthewoodsbreedmenoflearning，andshepherds\'
harbourphilosophers。“
“Atallevents，senor，“returnedthegoatherd，“theysheltermenofexperience；andthatyoumayseethetruthofthisandgraspit，thoughImayseemtoputmyselfforwardwithoutbeingasked，Iwill，ifitwillnottireyou，gentlemen，andyouwillgivemeyourattentionforalittle，tellyouatruestorywhichwillconfirmthisgentleman\'swordandhepointedtothecurateaswellasmyown。“
TothisDonQuixotereplied，“Seeingthatthisaffairhasacertaincolourofchivalryaboutit，Iformypart，brother，willhearyoumostgladly，andsowillallthesegentlemen，fromthehighintelligencetheypossessandtheirloveofcuriousnoveltiesthatinterest，charm，andentertainthemind，asIfeelquitesureyourstorywilldo。Sobegin，friend，forweareallpreparedtolisten。“
“Idrawmystakes，“saidSancho，“andwillretreatwiththispastytothebrookthere，whereImeantovictualmyselfforthreedays；forIhaveheardmylord，DonQuixote，saythataknight-errant\'ssquireshouldeatuntilhecanholdnomore，wheneverhehasthechance，becauseitoftenhappensthemtogetbyaccidentintoawoodsothickthattheycannotfindawayoutofitforsixdays；andifthemanisnotwellfilledorhisalforjaswellstored，therehemaystay，asveryoftenhedoes，turnedintoadriedmummy。“
“Thouartintherightofit，Sancho，“saidDonQuixote；“gowherethouwiltandeatallthoucanst，forIhavehadenough，andonlywanttogivemyminditsrefreshment，asIshallbylisteningtothisgoodfellow\'sstory。“
“Itiswhatweshallalldo，“saidthecanon；andthenbeggedthegoatherdtobeginthepromisedtale。
Thegoatherdgavethegoatwhichheheldbythehornsacoupleofslapsontheback，saying，“Liedownherebesideme，Spotty，forwehavetimeenoughtoreturntoourfold。“Thegoatseemedtounderstandhim，forashermasterseatedhimself，shestretchedherselfquietlybesidehimandlookedupinhisfacetoshowhimshewasallattentiontowhathewasgoingtosay，andtheninthesewordshebeganhisstory。
CHAPTERLI
WHICHDEALSWITHWHATTHEGOATHERDTOLDTHOSEWHOWERECARRYING
OFFDONQUIXOTE
THREEleaguesfromthisvalleythereisavillagewhich，thoughsmall，isoneoftherichestinallthisneighbourhood，andinittherelivedafarmer，averyworthyman，andsomuchrespectedthat，althoughtobesoisthenaturalconsequenceofbeingrich，hewasevenmorerespectedforhisvirtuethanforthewealthhehadacquired。Butwhatmadehimstillmorefortunate，ashesaidhimself，washavingadaughterofsuchexceedingbeauty，rareintelligence，gracefulness，andvirtue，thateveryonewhoknewherandbeheldhermarvelledattheextraordinarygiftswithwhichheavenandnaturehadendowedher。Asachildshewasbeautiful，shecontinuedtogrowinbeauty，andattheageofsixteenshewasmostlovely。Thefameofherbeautybegantospreadabroadthroughallthevillagesaround-butwhydoIsaythevillagesaround，merely，whenitspreadtodistantcities，andevenmadeitswayintothehallsofroyaltyandreachedtheearsofpeopleofeveryclass，whocamefromallsidestoseeherasiftoseesomethingrareandcurious，orsomewonder-workingimage？
Herfatherwatchedoverherandshewatchedoverherself；fortherearenolocks，orguards，orboltsthatcanprotectayounggirlbetterthanherownmodesty。Thewealthofthefatherandthebeautyofthedaughterledmanyneighboursaswellasstrangerstoseekherforawife；buthe，asonemightwellbewhohadthedisposalofsorichajewel，wasperplexedandunabletomakeuphismindtowhichofhercountlesssuitorsheshouldentrusther。Iwasoneamongthemanywhofeltadesiresonatural，and，asherfatherknewwhoIwas，andIwasofthesametown，ofpureblood，inthebloomoflife，andveryrichinpossessions，Ihadgreathopesofsuccess。
Therewasanotherofthesameplaceandqualificationswhoalsosoughther，andthismadeherfather\'schoicehanginthebalance，forhefeltthatoneitherofushisdaughterwouldbewellbestowed；sotoescapefromthisstateofperplexityheresolvedtoreferthemattertoLeandraforthatisthenameoftherichdamselwhohasreducedmetomisery，reflectingthataswewerebothequalitwouldbebesttoleaveittohisdeardaughtertochooseaccordingtoherinclination-acoursethatisworthyofimitationbyallfatherswhowishtosettletheirchildreninlife。Idonotmeanthattheyoughttoleavethemtomakeachoiceofwhatiscontemptibleandbad，butthattheyshouldplacebeforethemwhatisgoodandthenallowthemtomakeagoodchoiceastheyplease。IdonotknowwhichLeandrachose；Ionlyknowherfatherputusbothoffwiththetenderageofhisdaughterandvaguewordsthatneitherboundhimnordismissedus。MyrivaliscalledAnselmoandImyselfEugenio-thatyoumayknowthenamesofthepersonagesthatfigureinthistragedy，theendofwhichisstillinsuspense，thoughitisplaintoseeitmustbedisastrous。
AboutthistimetherearrivedinourtownoneVicentedelaRoca，thesonofapoorpeasantofthesametown，thesaidVicentehavingreturnedfromserviceasasoldierinItalyanddiversotherparts。
Acaptainwhochancedtopassthatwaywithhiscompanyhadcarriedhimofffromourvillagewhenhewasaboyofabouttwelveyears，andnowtwelveyearslatertheyoungmancamebackinasoldier\'suniform，arrayedinathousandcolours，andalloverglasstrinketsandfinesteelchains。To-dayhewouldappearinonegaydress，to-morrowinanother；butallflimsyandgaudy，oflittlesubstanceandlessworth。Thepeasantfolk，whoarenaturallymalicious，andwhentheyhavenothingtodocanbemaliceitself，remarkedallthis，andtooknoteofhisfineryandjewellery，piecebypiece，anddiscoveredthathehadthreesuitsofdifferentcolours，withgartersandstockingstomatch；buthemadesomanyarrangementsandcombinationsoutofthem，thatiftheyhadnotcountedthem，anyonewouldhaveswornthathehadmadeadisplayofmorethantensuitsofclothesandtwentyplumes。DonotlookuponallthisthatIamtellingyouabouttheclothesasuncalledfororspunout，fortheyhaveagreatdealtodowiththestory。Heusedtoseathimselfonabenchunderthegreatpoplarinourplaza，andtherehewouldkeepusallhangingopen-mouthedonthestorieshetoldusofhisexploits。
Therewasnocountryonthefaceoftheglobehehadnotseen，norbattlehehadnotbeenengagedin；hehadkilledmoreMoorsthanthereareinMoroccoandTunis，andfoughtmoresinglecombats，accordingtohisownaccount，thanGarcilaso，DiegoGarciadeParedesandathousandothershenamed，andoutofallhehadcomevictoriouswithoutlosingadropofblood。Ontheotherhandheshowedmarksofwounds，which，thoughtheycouldnotbemadeout，hesaidweregunshotwoundsreceivedindiversencountersandactions。Lastly，withmonstrousimpudenceheusedtosay“you“tohisequalsandeventhosewhoknewwhathewas，anddeclarethathisarmwashisfatherandhisdeedshispedigree，andthatbeingasoldierhewasasgoodasthekinghimself。Andtoaddtotheseswaggeringwayshewasatrifleofamusician，andplayedtheguitarwithsuchaflourishthatsomesaidhemadeitspeak；nordidhisaccomplishmentsendhere，forhewassomethingofapoettoo，andoneverytriflethathappenedinthetownhemadeaballadaleaguelong。
Thissoldier，then，thatIhavedescribed，thisVicentedelaRoca，thisbravo，gallant，musician，poet，wasoftenseenandwatchedbyLeandrafromawindowofherhousewhichlookedoutontheplaza。Theglitterofhisshowyattiretookherfancy，hisballadsbewitchedherforhegaveawaytwentycopiesofeveryonehemade，thetalesofhisexploitswhichhetoldabouthimselfcametoherears；andinshort，asthedevilnodoubthadarrangedit，shefellinlovewithhimbeforethepresumptionofmakinglovetoherhadsuggesteditselftohim；andasinlove-affairsnonearemoreeasilybroughttoanissuethanthosewhichhavetheinclinationoftheladyforanally，LeandraandVicentecametoanunderstandingwithoutanydifficulty；andbeforeanyofhernumeroussuitorshadanysuspicionofherdesign，shehadalreadycarrieditintoeffect，havingleftthehouseofherdearlybelovedfatherformothershehadnone，anddisappearedfromthevillagewiththesoldier，whocamemoretriumphantlyoutofthisenterprisethanoutofanyofthelargenumberhelaidclaimto。Allthevillageandallwhoheardofitwereamazedattheaffair；Iwasaghast，Anselmothunderstruck，herfatherfullofgrief，herrelationsindignant，theauthoritiesallinaferment，theofficersoftheBrotherhoodinarms。Theyscouredtheroads，theysearchedthewoodsandallquarters，andattheendofthreedaystheyfoundtheflightyLeandrainamountaincave，stripttohershift，androbbedofallthemoneyandpreciousjewelsshehadcarriedawayfromhomewithher。Theybroughtherbacktoherunhappyfather，andquestionedherastohermisfortune，andsheconfessedwithoutpressurethatVicentedelaRocahaddeceivedher，andunderpromiseofmarryingherhadinducedhertoleaveherfather\'shouse，ashemeanttotakehertotherichestandmostdelightfulcityinthewholeworld，whichwasNaples；andthatshe，ill-advisedanddeluded，hadbelievedhim，androbbedherfather，andhandedoveralltohimthenightshedisappeared；andthathehadcarriedherawaytoaruggedmountainandshutherupintheeavewheretheyhadfoundher。Shesaid，moreover，thatthesoldier，withoutrobbingherofherhonour，hadtakenfromhereverythingshehad，andmadeoff，leavingherinthecave，athingthatstillfurthersurprisedeverybody。Itwasnoteasyforustocredittheyoungman\'scontinence，butsheasserteditwithsuchearnestnessthatithelpedtoconsoleherdistressedfather，whothoughtnothingofwhathadbeentakensincethejewelthatoncelostcanneverberecoveredhadbeenlefttohisdaughter。ThesamedaythatLeandramadeherappearanceherfatherremovedherfromoursightandtookherawaytoshutherupinaconventinatownnearthis，inthehopethattimemaywearawaysomeofthedisgraceshehasincurred。Leandra\'syouthfurnishedanexcuseforherfault，atleastwiththosetowhomitwasofnoconsequencewhethershewasgoodorbad；butthosewhoknewhershrewdnessandintelligencedidnotattributehermisdemeanourtoignorancebuttowantonnessandthenaturaldispositionofwomen，whichisforthemostpartflightyandill-regulated。
Leandrawithdrawnfromsight，Anselmo\'seyesgrewblind，oratanyratefoundnothingtolookatthatgavethemanypleasure，andminewereindarknesswithoutarayoflighttodirectthemtoanythingenjoyablewhileLeandrawasaway。Ourmelancholygrewgreater，ourpatiencegrewless；wecursedthesoldier\'sfineryandrailedatthecarelessnessofLeandra\'sfather。AtlastAnselmoandIagreedtoleavethevillageandcometothisvalley；and，hefeedingagreatflockofsheepofhisown，andIalargeherdofgoatsofmine，wepassourlifeamongthetrees，givingventtooursorrows，togethersingingthefairLeandra\'spraises，orupbraidingher，orelsesighingalone，andtoheavenpouringforthourcomplaintsinsolitude。
Followingourexample，manymoreofLeandra\'slovershavecometotheserudemountainsandadoptedourmodeoflife，andtheyaresonumerousthatonewouldfancytheplacehadbeenturnedintothepastoralArcadia，sofullisitofshepherdsandsheep-folds；noristhereaspotinitwherethenameofthefairLeandraisnotheard。
Hereonecursesherandcallshercapricious，fickle，andimmodest，thereanothercondemnsherasfrailandfrivolous；thispardonsandabsolvesher，thatspurnsandrevilesher；oneextolsherbeauty，anotherassailshercharacter，andinshortallabuseher，andalladoreher，andtosuchapitchhasthisgeneralinfatuationgonethattherearesomewhocomplainofherscornwithouteverhavingexchangedawordwithher，andevensomethatbewailandmourntheragingfeverofjealousy，forwhichshenevergaveanyonecause，for，asIhavealreadysaid，hermisconductwasknownbeforeherpassion。Thereisnonookamongtherocks，nobrookside，noshadebeneaththetreesthatisnothauntedbysomeshepherdtellinghiswoestothebreezes；whereverthereisanechoitrepeatsthenameofLeandra；themountainsringwith“Leandra，““Leandra“murmurthebrooks，andLeandrakeepsusallbewilderedandbewitched，hopingwithouthopeandfearingwithoutknowingwhatwefear。OfallthissillysettheonethatshowstheleastandalsothemostsenseismyrivalAnselmo，forhavingsomanyotherthingstocomplainof，heonlycomplainsofseparation，andtotheaccompanimentofarebeck，whichheplaysadmirably，hesingshiscomplaintsinversesthatshowhisingenuity。Ifollowanother，easier，andtomymindwisercourse，andthatistorailatthefrivolityofwomen，attheirinconstancy，theirdoubledealing，theirbrokenpromises，theirunkeptpledges，andinshortthewantofreflectiontheyshowinfixingtheiraffectionsandinclinations。This，sirs，wasthereasonofwordsandexpressionsImadeuseoftothisgoatwhenIcameupjustnow；forassheisafemaleIhaveacontemptforher，thoughsheisthebestinallmyfold。ThisisthestoryIpromisedtotellyou，andifIhavebeentediousintellingit，Iwillnotbeslowtoserveyou；myhutiscloseby，andIhavefreshmilkanddaintycheesethere，aswellasavarietyoftoothsomefruit，nolesspleasingtotheeyethantothepalate。
CHAPTERLII
OFTHEQUARRELTHATDONQUIXOTEHADWITHTHEGOATHERD，TOGETHERWITH
THERAREADVENTUREOFTHEPENITENTS，WHICHWITHANEXPENDITUREOF
SWEATHEBROUGHTTOAHAPPYCONCLUSION
THEgoatherd\'stalegavegreatsatisfactiontoallthehearers，andthecanonespeciallyenjoyedit，forhehadremarkedwithparticularattentionthemannerinwhichithadbeentold，whichwasasunlikethemannerofaclownishgoatherdasitwaslikethatofapolishedcitywit；andheobservedthatthecuratehadbeenquiterightinsayingthatthewoodsbredmenoflearning。TheyallofferedtheirservicestoEugeniobuthewhoshowedhimselfmostliberalinthiswaywasDonQuixote，whosaidtohim，“Mostassuredly，brothergoatherd，ifIfoundmyselfinapositiontoattemptanyadventure，Iwould，thisveryinstant，setoutonyourbehalf，andwouldrescueLeandrafromthatconventwherenodoubtsheiskeptagainstherwill，inspiteoftheabbessandallwhomighttrytopreventme，andwouldplaceherinyourhandstodealwithheraccordingtoyourwillandpleasure，observing，however，thelawsofchivalrywhichlaydownthatnoviolenceofanykindistobeofferedtoanydamsel。ButItrustinGodourLordthatthemightofonemalignantenchantermaynotprovesogreatbutthatthepowerofanotherbetterdisposedmayprovesuperiortoit，andthenIpromiseyoumysupportandassistance，asIamboundtodobymyprofession，whichisnoneotherthantogiveaidtotheweakandneedy。“
Thegoatherdeyedhim，andnoticingDonQuixote\'ssorryappearanceandlooks，hewasfilledwithwonder，andaskedthebarber，whowasnexthim，“Senor，whoisthismanwhomakessuchafigureandtalksinsuchastrain？”
“Whoshoulditbe，“saidthebarber，“butthefamousDonQuixoteofLaMancha，theundoerofinjustice，therighterofwrongs，theprotectorofdamsels，theterrorofgiants，andthewinnerofbattles？”
“That，“saidthegoatherd，“soundslikewhatonereadsinthebooksoftheknights-errant，whodidallthatyousaythismandoes；
thoughitismybeliefthateitheryouarejoking，orelsethisgentlemanhasemptylodgingsinhishead。“
“Youareagreatscoundrel，“saidDonQuixote，“anditisyouwhoareemptyandafool。Iamfullerthaneverwasthewhoresonbitchthatboreyou；“andpassingfromwordstodeeds，hecaughtupaloafthatwasnearhimandsentitfullinthegoatherd\'sface，withsuchforcethatheflattenedhisnose；butthegoatherd，whodidnotunderstandjokes，andfoundhimselfroughlyhandledinsuchgoodearnest，payingnorespecttocarpet，tablecloth，ordiners，spranguponDonQuixote，andseizinghimbythethroatwithbothhandswouldnodoubthavethrottledhim，hadnotSanchoPanzathatinstantcometotherescue，andgraspinghimbytheshouldersflunghimdownonthetable，smashingplates，breakingglasses，andupsettingandscatteringeverythingonit。DonQuixote，findinghimselffree，strovetogetontopofthegoatherd，who，withhisfacecoveredwithblood，andsoundlykickedbySancho，wasonallfoursfeelingaboutforoneofthetable-knivestotakeabloodyrevengewith。Thecanonandthecurate，however，preventedhim，butthebarbersocontriveditthathegotDonQuixoteunderhim，andraineddownuponhimsuchashoweroffisticuffsthatthepoorknight\'sfacestreamedwithbloodasfreelyashisown。Thecanonandthecuratewereburstingwithlaughter，theofficerswerecaperingwithdelight，andboththeoneandtheotherhissedthemonastheydodogsthatareworryingoneanotherinafight。Sanchoalonewasfrantic，forhecouldnotfreehimselffromthegraspofoneofthecanon\'sservants，whokepthimfromgoingtohismaster\'sassistance。
Atlast，whiletheywereall，withtheexceptionofthetwobruiserswhoweremaulingeachother，inhighgleeandenjoyment，theyheardatrumpetsoundanotesodolefulthatitmadethemalllookinthedirectionwhencethesoundseemedtocome。ButtheonethatwasmostexcitedbyhearingitwasDonQuixote，whothoughsorelyagainsthiswillhewasunderthegoatherd，andsomethingmorethanprettywellpummelled，saidtohim，“Brotherdevilforitisimpossiblebutthatthoumustbeonesincethouhasthadmightandstrengthenoughtoovercomemine，Iasktheetoagreetoatruceforbutonehourforthesolemnnoteofyondertrumpetthatfallsonourearsseemstometosummonmetosomenewadventure。“Thegoatherd，whowasbythistimetiredofpummellingandbeingpummelled，releasedhimatonce，andDonQuixoterisingtohisfeetandturninghiseyestothequarterwherethesoundhadbeenheard，suddenlysawcomingdowntheslopeofahillseveralmencladinwhitelikepenitents。
Thefactwasthatthecloudshadthatyearwithheldtheirmoisturefromtheearth，andinallthevillagesofthedistricttheywereorganisingprocessions，rogations，andpenances，imploringGodtoopenthehandsofhismercyandsendtherain；andtothisendthepeopleofavillagethatwashardbyweregoinginprocessiontoaholyhermitagetherewasononesideofthatvalley。DonQuixotewhenhesawthestrangegarbofthepenitents，withoutreflectinghowoftenhehadseenitbefore，tookitintohisheadthatthiswasacaseofadventure，andthatitfelltohimaloneasaknight-erranttoengageinit；andhewasallthemoreconfirmedinthisnotion，bytheideathatanimagedrapedinblacktheyhadwiththemwassomeillustriousladythatthesevillainsanddiscourteousthieveswerecarryingoffbyforce。AssoonasthisoccurredtohimheranwithallspeedtoRocinantewhowasgrazingatlarge，andtakingthebridleandthebucklerfromthesaddle-bow，hehadhimbridledinaninstant，andcallingtoSanchoforhisswordhemountedRocinante，bracedhisbuckleronhisarm，andinaloudvoiceexclaimedtothosewhostoodby，“Now，noblecompany，yeshallseehowimportantitisthatthereshouldbeknightsintheworldprofessingtheofknight-errantry；now，Isay，yeshallsee，bythedeliveranceofthatworthyladywhoisbornecaptivethere，whetherknights-errantdeservetobeheldinestimation，“andsosayinghebroughthislegstobearonRocinante-
forhehadnospurs-andatafullcanterforinallthisveracioushistoryweneverreadofRocinantefairlygallopingsetofftoencounterthepenitents，thoughthecurate，thecanon，andthebarberrantopreventhim。Butitwasoutoftheirpower，nordidheevenstopfortheshoutsofSanchocallingafterhim，“Whereareyougoing，SenorDonQuixote？WhatdevilshavepossessedyoutosetyouonagainstourCatholicfaith？Plaguetakeme！mind，thatisaprocessionofpenitents，andtheladytheyarecarryingonthatstandthereistheblessedimageoftheimmaculateVirgin。Takecarewhatyouaredoing，senor，forthistimeitmaybesafelysaidyoudon\'tknowwhatyouareabout。“Sancholabouredinvain，forhismasterwassobentoncomingtoquarterswiththesesheetedfiguresandreleasingtheladyinblackthathedidnothearaword；andevenhadheheard，hewouldnothaveturnedbackifthekinghadorderedhim。HecameupwiththeprocessionandreinedinRocinante，whowasalreadyanxiousenoughtoslackenspeedalittle，andinahoarse，excitedvoiceheexclaimed，“Youwhohideyourfaces，perhapsbecauseyouarenotgoodsubjects，payattentionandlistentowhatIamabouttosaytoyou。“Thefirsttohaltwerethosewhowerecarryingtheimage，andoneofthefourecclesiasticswhowerechantingtheLitany，struckbythestrangefigureofDonQuixote，theleannessofRocinante，andtheotherludicrouspeculiaritiesheobserved，saidinreplytohim，“Brother，ifyouhaveanythingtosaytoussayitquickly，forthesebrethrenarewhippingthemselves，andwecannotstop，norisitreasonableweshouldstoptohearanything，unlessindeeditisshortenoughtobesaidintwowords。“
“Iwillsayitinone，“repliedDonQuixote，“anditisthis；thatatonce，thisveryinstant，yereleasethatfairladywhosetearsandsadaspectshowplainlythatyearecarryingheroffagainstherwill，andthatyehavecommittedsomescandalousoutrageagainsther；andI，whowasbornintotheworldtoredressallsuchlikewrongs，willnotpermityoutoadvanceanotherstepuntilyouhaverestoredtoherthelibertyshepinesforanddeserves。“
Fromthesewordsallthehearersconcludedthathemustbeamadman，andbegantolaughheartily，andtheirlaughteractedlikegunpowderonDonQuixote\'sfury，fordrawinghisswordwithoutanotherwordhemadearushatthestand。Oneofthosewhosupportedit，leavingtheburdentohiscomrades，advancedtomeethim，flourishingaforkedstickthathehadforproppingupthestandwhenresting，andwiththishecaughtamightycutDonQuixotemadeathimthatsevereditintwo；butwiththeportionthatremainedinhishandhedealtsuchathwackontheshoulderofDonQuixote\'sswordarmwhichthebucklercouldnotprotectagainsttheclownishassaultthatpoorDonQuixotecametothegroundinasadplight。
SanchoPanza，whowascomingonclosebehindpuffingandblowing，seeinghimfall，criedouttohisassailantnottostrikehimagain，forhewaspoorenchantedknight，whohadneverharmedanyoneallthedaysofhislife；butwhatcheckedtheclownwas，notSancho\'sshouting，butseeingthatDonQuixotedidnotstirhandorfoot；andso，fancyinghehadkilledhim，hehastilyhitcheduphistunicunderhisgirdleandtooktohisheelsacrossthecountrylikeadeer。
BythistimeallDonQuixote\'scompanionshadcomeuptowherehelay；buttheprocessionistsseeingthemcomerunning，andwiththemtheofficersoftheBrotherhoodwiththeircrossbows，apprehendedmischief，andclusteringroundtheimage，raisedtheirhoods，andgraspedtheirscourges，asthepriestsdidtheirtapers，andawaitedtheattack，resolvedtodefendthemselvesandeventotaketheoffensiveagainsttheirassailantsiftheycould。Fortune，however，arrangedthematterbetterthantheyexpected，forallSanchodidwastoflinghimselfonhismaster\'sbody，raisingoverhimthemostdolefulandlaughablelamentationthateverwasheard，forhebelievedhewasdead。Thecuratewasknowntoanothercuratewhowalkedintheprocession，andtheirrecognitionofoneanothersetatresttheapprehensionsofbothparties；thefirstthentoldtheotherintwowordswhoDonQuixotewas，andheandthewholetroopofpenitentswenttoseeifthepoorgentlemanwasdead，andheardSanchoPanzasaying，withtearsinhiseyes，“Ohflowerofchivalry，thatwithoneblowofastickhastendedthecourseofthywell-spentlife！Ohprideofthyrace，honourandgloryofallLaMancha，nay，ofalltheworld，thatforwantoftheewillbefullofevil-doers，nolongerinfearofpunishmentfortheirmisdeeds！Ohthou，generousabovealltheAlexanders，sinceforonlyeightmonthsofservicethouhastgivenmethebestislandtheseagirdsorsurrounds！Humblewiththeproud，haughtywiththehumble，encountererofdangers，endurerofoutrages，enamouredwithoutreason，imitatorofthegood，scourgeofthewicked，enemyofthemean，inshort，knight-errant，whichisallthatcanbesaid！”
AtthecriesandmoansofSancho，DonQuixotecametohimself，andthefirstwordhesaidwas，“Hewholivesseparatedfromyou，sweetestDulcinea，hasgreatermiseriestoendurethanthese。Aidme，friendSancho，tomounttheenchantedcart，forIamnotinaconditiontopressthesaddleofRocinante，asthisshoulderisallknockedtopieces。“
“ThatIwilldowithallmyheart，senor，“saidSancho；“andletusreturntoourvillagewiththesegentlemen，whoseekyourgood，andtherewewillprepareformakinganothersally，whichmayturnoutmoreprofitableandcreditabletous。“
“Thouartright，Sancho，“returnedDonQuixote；“Itwillbewisetoletthemaligninfluenceofthestarswhichnowprevailspassoff。“
Thecanon，thecurate，andthebarbertoldhimhewouldactverywiselyindoingashesaid；andso，highlyamusedatSanchoPanza\'ssimplicities，theyplacedDonQuixoteinthecartasbefore。Theprocessiononcemoreformeditselfinorderandproceededonitsroad；
thegoatherdtookhisleaveoftheparty；theofficersoftheBrotherhooddeclinedtogoanyfarther，andthecuratepaidthemwhatwasduetothem；thecanonbeggedthecuratetolethimknowhowDonQuixotedid，whetherhewascuredofhismadnessorstillsufferedfromit，andthenbeggedleavetocontinuehisjourney；inshort，theyallseparatedandwenttheirways，leavingtothemselvesthecurateandthebarber，DonQuixote，SanchoPanza，andthegoodRocinante，whoregardedeverythingwithasgreatresignationashismaster。ThecarteryokedhisoxenandmadeDonQuixotecomfortableonatrussofhay，andathisusualdeliberatepacetooktheroadthecuratedirected，andattheendofsixdaystheyreachedDonQuixote\'svillage，andentereditaboutthemiddleoftheday，whichitsohappenedwasaSunday，andthepeoplewereallintheplaza，throughwhichDonQuixote\'scartpassed。Theyallflockedtoseewhatwasinthecart，andwhentheyrecognisedtheirtownsmantheywerefilledwithamazement，andaboyranofftobringthenewstohishousekeeperandhisniecethattheirmasterandunclehadcomebackallleanandyellowandstretchedonatrussofhayonanox-cart。
Itwaspiteoustohearthecriesthetwogoodladiesraised，howtheybeattheirbreastsandpouredoutfreshmaledictionsonthoseaccursedbooksofchivalry；allwhichwasrenewedwhentheysawDonQuixotecominginatthegate。
AtthenewsofDonQuixote\'sarrivalSanchoPanza\'swifecamerunning，forshebythistimeknewthatherhusbandhadgoneawaywithhimashissquire，andonseeingSancho，thefirstthingsheaskedhimwasiftheasswaswell。Sanchorepliedthathewas，betterthanhismasterwas。
“ThanksbetoGod，“saidshe，“forbeingsogoodtome；butnowtellme，myfriend，whathaveyoumadebyyoursquirings？Whatgownhaveyoubroughtmeback？Whatshoesforyourchildren？”
“Ibringnothingofthatsort，wife，“saidSancho；“thoughIbringotherthingsofmoreconsequenceandvalue。“
“Iamverygladofthat，“returnedhiswife；“showmethesethingsofmorevalueandconsequence，myfriend；forIwanttoseethemtocheermyheartthathasbeensosadandheavyalltheseagesthatyouhavebeenaway。“
“Iwillshowthemtoyouathome，wife，“saidSancho；“becontentforthepresent；forifitpleaseGodthatweshouldagaingoonourtravelsinsearchofadventures，youwillsoonseemeacount，orgovernorofanisland，andthatnotoneofthoseeverydayones，butthebestthatistobehad。“
“Heavengrantit，husband，“saidshe，“forindeedwehaveneedofit。Buttellme，what\'sthisaboutislands，forIdon\'tunderstandit？”
“Honeyisnotforthemouthoftheass，“returnedSancho；“allingoodtimethoushaltsee，wife-nay，thouwiltbesurprisedtohearthyselfcalled\'yourladyship\'byallthyvassals。“
“Whatareyoutalkingabout，Sancho，withyourladyships，islands，andvassals？”returnedTeresaPanza-forsoSancho\'swifewascalled，thoughtheywerenotrelations，forinLaManchaitiscustomaryforwivestotaketheirhusbands\'surnames。
“Don\'tbeinsuchahurrytoknowallthis，Teresa，“saidSancho；
“itisenoughthatIamtellingyouthetruth，soshutyourmouth。ButImaytellyouthismuchbytheway，thatthereisnothingintheworldmoredelightfulthantobeapersonofconsideration，squiretoaknight-errant，andaseekerofadventures。Tobesuremostofthoseonefindsdonotendaspleasantlyasonecouldwish，foroutofahundred，ninety-ninewillturnoutcrossandcontrary。Iknowitbyexperience，foroutofsomeIcameblanketed，andoutofothersbelaboured。Still，forallthat，itisafinethingtobeonthelook-outforwhatmayhappen，crossingmountains，searchingwoods，climbingrocks，visitingcastles，puttingupatinns，allatfreequarters，anddeviltakethemaraveditopay。“
WhilethisconversationpassedbetweenSanchoPanzaandhiswife，DonQuixote\'shousekeeperandniecetookhiminandundressedhimandlaidhiminhisoldbed。Heeyedthemaskance，andcouldnotmakeoutwherehewas。Thecuratechargedhisniecetobeverycarefultomakeherunclecomfortableandtokeepawatchoverhimlestheshouldmakehisescapefromthemagain，tellingherwhattheyhadbeenobligedtodotobringhimhome。Onthisthepaironcemorelifteduptheirvoicesandrenewedtheirmaledictionsuponthebooksofchivalry，andimploredheaventoplungetheauthorsofsuchliesandnonsenseintothemidstofthebottomlesspit。Theywere，inshort，keptinanxietyanddreadlesttheiruncleandmastershouldgivethemtheslipthemomenthefoundhimselfsomewhatbetter，andastheyfearedsoitfellout。
Buttheauthorofthishistory，thoughhehasdevotedresearchandindustrytothediscoveryofthedeedsachievedbyDonQuixoteinhisthirdsally，hasbeenunabletoobtainanyinformationrespectingthem，atanyratederivedfromauthenticdocuments；
traditionhasmerelypreservedinthememoryofLaManchathefactthatDonQuixote，thethirdtimehesalliedforthfromhishome，betookhimselftoSaragossa，wherehewaspresentatsomefamousjoustswhichcameoffinthatcity，andthathehadadventuresthereworthyofhisvalourandhighintelligence。Ofhisendanddeathhecouldlearnnoparticulars，norwouldhehaveascertaineditorknownofit，ifgoodfortunehadnotproducedanoldphysicianforhimwhohadinhispossessionaleadenbox，which，accordingtohisaccount，hadbeendiscoveredamongthecrumblingfoundationsofanancienthermitagethatwasbeingrebuilt；inwhichboxwerefoundcertainparchmentmanuscriptsinGothiccharacter，butinCastilianverse，containingmanyofhisachievements，andsettingforththebeautyofDulcinea，theformofRocinante，thefidelityofSanchoPanza，andtheburialofDonQuixotehimself，togetherwithsundryepitaphsandeulogiesonhislifeandcharacter；butallthatcouldbereadanddecipheredwerethosewhichthetrustworthyauthorofthisnewandunparalleledhistoryherepresents。AndthesaidauthorasksofthosethatshallreaditnothinginreturnforthevasttoilwhichithascosthiminexaminingandsearchingtheMancheganarchivesinordertobringittolight，savethattheygivehimthesamecreditthatpeopleofsensegivetothebooksofchivalrythatpervadetheworldandaresopopular；forwiththishewillconsiderhimselfamplypaidandfullysatisfied，andwillbeencouragedtoseekoutandproduceotherhistories，ifnotastruthful，atleastequalininventionandnotlessentertaining。Thefirstwordswrittenontheparchmentfoundintheleadenboxwerethese：
THEACADEMICIANSOF
ARGAMASILLA，AVILLAGEOF
LAMANCHA，ONTHELIFEANDDEATH
OFDONQUIXOTEOFLAMANCHA，HOCSCRIPSERUNT
MONICONGO，ACADEMICIANOFARGAMASILLA，ONTHETOMBOFDONQUIXOTE
EPITAPH
ThescatterbrainthatgaveLaManchamoreRichspoilsthanJason\'s；whoapointsokeenHadtohiswit，andhappierfarhadbeenIfhiswit\'sweathercockablunterbore；
ThearmrenownedfarasGaeta\'sshore，Cathay，andallthelandsthatliebetween；
ThemusediscreetandterribleinmienAseverwroteonbrassindaysofyore；
HewhosurpassedtheAmadisesall，AndwhoasnaughttheGalaorsaccounted，Supportedbyhisloveandgallantry：
WhomadetheBelianisessingsmall，AndsoughtrenownonRocinantemounted；
Here，underneaththiscoldstone，dothhelie。
PANIAGUADO，ACADEMICIANOFARGAMASILLA，INLAUDEMDULCINEAEDELTOBOSO
SONNET
She，whosefullfeaturesmaybeheredescried，High-bosomed，withabearingofdisdain，IsDulcinea，sheforwhominvainThegreatDonQuixoteofLaManchasighed。
Forher，Toboso\'squeen，fromsidetosideHetraversedthegrimsierra，thechampaignOfAranjuez，andMontiel\'sfamousplain：
OnRocinanteoftawearyride。
Malignantplanets，crueldestiny，Pursuedthemboth，thefairManchegandame，Andtheunconqueredstarofchivalry。
NoryouthnorbeautysavedherfromtheclaimOfdeath；hepaidlove\'sbitterpenalty，Andleftthemarbletopreservehisname。
CAPRICHOSO，AMOSTACUTEACADEMICIAN
OFARGAMASILLA，INPRAISEOFROCINANTE，STEEDOFDONQUIXOTEOFLAMANCHA
SONNET
Onthatproudthroneofdiamantinesheen，Whichtheblood-reekingfeetofMarsdegrade，ThemadManchegan\'sbannernowhathbeenByhiminallitsbraverydisplayed。
TherehathhehunghisarmsandtrenchantbladeWherewith，achievingdeedstillnowunseen，Heslays，layslow，cleaves，hews；butarthathmadeAnovelstyleforournewpaladin。
IfAmadisbetheproudboastofGaul，IfbyhisprogenythefameofGreeceThroughalltheregionsoftheearthbespread，GreatQuixotecrownedingrimBellona\'shallTo-dayexaltsLaManchaoverthese，AndaboveGreeceorGaulsheholdsherhead。
Norendshisgloryhere，forhisgoodsteedDothBrilladorandBayardfarexceed；
AsmettledsteedscomparedwithRocinante，Thereputationtheyhavewonisscanty。
BURLADOR，ACADEMICIANOFARGAMASILLA，ONSANCHOPANZA
SONNET
TheworthySanchoPanzahereyousee；
Agreatsouloncewasinthatbodysmall，NorwastheresquireuponthisearthlyballSoplainandsimple，orofguilesofree。
WithinanaceofbeingCountwashe，AndwouldhavebeenbutforthespiteandgallOfthisvileage，meanandilliberal，Thatcannotevenletadonkeybe。
Formountedonanassexcusetheword，ByRocinante\'ssidethisgentlesquireWaswonthiswanderingmastertoattend。
DelusivehopesthatlurethecommonherdWithpromisesofease，theheart\'sdesire，Inshadows，dreams，andsmokeyealwaysend。
CACHIDIABLO，ACADEMICIANOFARGAMASILLA，ONTHETOMBOFDONQUIXOTE
EPITAPH
Theknightliesherebelow，Ill-errantandbruisedsore，WhomRocinanteboreInhiswanderingstoandfro。
BythesideoftheknightislaidStolidmanSanchotoo，ThanwhomasquiremoretrueWasnotintheesquiretrade。
TIQUITOC，ACADEMICIANOFARGAMASILLA，ONTHETOMBOFDULCINEADELTOBOSO
EPITAPH
HereDulcinealies。
Plumpwassheandrobust：
Nowsheisashesanddust：
Theendofallfleshthatdies。
Aladyofhighdegree，Withtheportofaloftydame，AndthegreatDonQuixote\'sflame，Andtheprideofhervillagewasshe。
Thesewerealltheversesthatcouldbedeciphered；therest，thewritingbeingworm-eaten，werehandedovertooneoftheAcademicianstomakeouttheirmeaningconjecturally。Wehavebeeninformedthatatthecostofmanysleeplessnightsandmuchtoilhehassucceeded，andthathemeanstopublishtheminhopesofDonQuixote\'sthirdsally。
“Forsealtrocanteraconmigliorplectro。“