VII
AfterthiswhirlwindMr。Hoopdriverpaidhisreckoningand——beingnowalittlerestedaboutthemusclesoftheknees——resumedhissaddleandrodeoninthedirectionofRipley，alonganexcellentbutundulatingroad。Hewaspleasedtofindhiscommandoverhismachinealreadysensiblyincreased。Hesethimselflittleexercisesashewentalongandperformedthemwithvariablesuccess。Therewas，forinstance，steeringinbetweenacoupleofstones，sayafootapart，adeedoflittledifficultyasfarasthefrontwheelisconcerned。Butthebackwheel，notbeingundertheswayofthehumaneye，isapttotakeaviciousjumpovertheobstacle，whichsendsaviolentconcussionallalongthespinetotheskull，andwillevenjerkalooselyfastenedhatovertheeyes，andsoleadtomuchconfusion。Andagain，therewastakingthehandorhandsoffthehandlebar，athingsimpleinitself，butcomplexinitsconsequences。ThisparticularlywasafeatMr。
Hoopdriverdesiredtodo，forseveraldivergentreasons;butatpresentitsimplyledtoconvulsivebalancingsandnovelandinelegantmodesofdismounting。
Thehumannoseis，atitsbest，aneedlessexcrescence。Therearethosewhoconsideritornamental，andwouldregardafacedeprivedofitsassistancewithpityorderision;butitisdoubtfulwhetherouresteemisdictatedsomuchbyasenseofitsabsolutebeautyasbythevitiatingeffectofauniversallyprevalentfashion。Inthecaseofbicyclestudents，asintheyoungofbothsexes，itsinutilityisaggravatedbyitspersistentannoyance——itrequiresconstantattention。Untilonecanridewithonehand，andsearchfor，secure，anduseapockethandkerchiefwiththeother，cyclingisnecessarilyaconstantseriesofdescents。Nothingcanbefurtherfromtheauthor’sambitionthanawantonrealism，butMr。Hoopdriver’snoseisaplainandsalientfact，andfaceitwemust。And，inadditiontothisinconvenience，thereareflies。Untilthecyclistcansteerwithonehand，hisfaceisgivenovertoBeelzebub。Contemplativefliesstrolloverit，andtrifleabsentlywithitsmostsensitivesurfaces。Theonlywaytodislodgethemistoshaketheheadforciblyandtowritheone’sfeaturesviolently。Thisisnotonlyalengthyandfrequentlyineffectualmethod，butoneexceedinglyterrifyingtofootpassengers。Andagain，sometimesthebeginnerridesforaspacewithoneeyeclosedbyperspiration，givinghimawaggishairforeigntohismoodandillcalculatedtooverawetheimpertinent。However，youwillappreciatenowthemotiveofMr。Hoopdriver’sexperiments。Hepresentlyattainedsufficientdexteritytoslaphimselfsmartlyandviolentlyinthefacewithhisrighthand，withoutcertainlyoverturningthemachine;buthispockethandkerchiefmighthavebeeninCaliforniaforanygooditwastohimwhilehewasinthesaddle。
YetyoumustnotthinkthatbecauseMr。Hoopdriverwasalittleuncomfortable，hewasunhappyintheslightestdegree。InthebackgroundofhisconsciousnesswasthesensethataboutthistimeBriggswouldbehalf—waythroughhiswindowdressing，andGosling，theapprentice，busy，withachairturneddownoverthecounterandhisearsveryred，tryingtorollapieceofhuckaback——onlythosewhohaverolledpiecesofhuckabackknowquitehowdetestablehuckabackistoroll——andtheshopwouldbedustyand，perhaps，thegovernoraboutandsnappy。Andherewasquietandgreenery，andonemuckedaboutasthedesiretookone，withoutasoultosee，andherewasnowailingof\"Sayn，\"nofoldingofremnants，novoicetoshout，\"Hoopdriver，forward！\"