Amostunnecessarypreamble,nodoubt,andofdoubtfulefficacyinsmoothinghiswaytoacorrectunderstandingwiththedeeplybereavedfather。Buthelookedsohandsomeashethusassertedhimselfandmadesomuchofhisinchesandthenoblepoiseofhishead-thoughcoldofeyeandalwayscoldofmanner-thatthosewhosaw,aswellasheardhim,forgavethisdisplayofegotisminconsiderationofitshonestyandthedignityitimpartedtohisperson。”IfirstmetMissChallonerintheBerkshires,”hebegan,afteramomentofquietlisteningforanypossiblesoundfromtheotherroom。”Ihadbeenonthetramp,andhadstoppedatoneofthegreathotelsforasevendays’rest。IwillacknowledgethatIchosethisspotattheinstigationofarelativewhoknewmytastesandhowperfectlytheymightbegratifiedthere。ThatIshouldminglewiththeguestsmaynothavebeeninhisthought,anymorethanitwasinmineatthebeginningofmystay。Thepanoramaofbeautyspreadoutbeforemeoneverysidewassufficientinitselfformyenjoyment,andmighthavecontinuedsototheendifmyattentionhadnotbeenveryforciblydrawnononememorablemorningtoayounglady-MissChalloner-bytheveryearnestlookshegavemeasIwascrossingtheofficefromoneverandahtoanother。Imustinsistonthislook,evenifitshockthedelicacyofmylisteners,forwithouttheinterestitawakenedinme,Imightnothavenoticedtheblushwithwhichsheturnedasidetojoinherfriendsontheverandah。Itwasanoverwhelmingblushwhichcouldnothavesprungfromanyslightembarrassment,and,thoughIhatethepretensionsofthoseegotistswhoseeinawoman’ssmilemorethanitbyrightconveys,Icouldnothelpbeingmovedbythisdisplayoffeelinginonesogiftedwitheverygraceandattributeoftheperfectwoman。WithlesscautionthanIusuallydisplay,Iapproachedthedeskwhereshehadbeenstandingand,meetingtheeyesoftheclerk,askedtheyounglady’sname。Hegaveit,andwaitedformetoexpressthesurpriseheexpectedittoevoke。ButIfeltnoneandshowednone。Otherfeelingshadseizedme。Ihadheardofthisgraciouswomanfrommanysources,inmylifeamongthesufferingmassesofNewYork,andnowthatIhadseenherandfoundhertobenotonlymyidealofpersonallovelinessbutseeminglyapproachableandnotuninterestedinmyself,Iallowedmyfancytosoarandmyhearttobecometouched。
Afactwhichtheclerknowconfidedtomenaturallydeepenedtheimpression。MissChallonerhadseenmynameintheguest-bookandaskedtohavemepointedouttoher。PerhapsshehadheardmynamespokeninthesamequarterwhereIhadheardhers。Wehaveneverexchangedconfidencesonthesubject,andIcannotsay。IcanonlygiveyoumyreasonfortheinterestIfeltinMissChallonerandwhyIforgot,intheglamourofthisepisode,theaimsandpurposesofanotunambitiouslifeandthedistancewhichtheworldandtheso-calledaristocraticclassputbetweenawomanofherwealthandstandingandasimpleworkerlikemyself。”Imustbepardoned。Shehadsmileduponmeonce,andshesmiledagain。Daysbeforewewereformallypresented,Icaughthersoftenedlookturnedmyway,aswepassedeachotherinhallorcorridor。Wewerefriends,orsoitappearedtome,beforeeverawordpassedbetweenus,andwhenfortunefavouredusandweweredulyintroduced,ourmindsmetinastrangesympathywhichmadethisoneinterviewamemorableonetome。Unhappily,asIthenconsideredit,thiswasmylastdayatthehotel,andourconversation,interruptedfrequentlybypassingacquaintances,wasneverresumed。Iexchangedafewwordswithherbywayofgood-byebutnothingmore。IcametoNewYork,andsheremainedinLenox。
AmonthafterandshetoocametoNewYork。””Thisgood-bye-doyourememberit?Theexactlanguage,Imean?””Ido;itmadeagreatimpressiononme。’Ishallhopeforourfurtheracquaintance,’shesaid。’Wehaveoneverystronginterestincommon。Andifeverahumanfacespokeeloquently,itwashersatthatmoment。Theinterest,asIunderstoodit,wasourmutualsympathyforourtoiling,half-starved,down-troddenbrothersandsistersinthelowerstreetsofthiscity;buttheeloquence-thatIprobablymistook。Ithoughtitsprangfrompersonalinterest,anditgavemecouragetopursuetheintentionwhichhadtakentheplaceofeveryotherfeelingandambitionbywhichIhadhithertobeenmoved。Herewasawomaninathousand;onewhocouldmakeamanofmeindeed。Ifshecouldignorethesocialgulfbetweenus,Ifeltfreetotaketheleap。Cowardicehadneverbeenafaultofmine。
ButIwasnofooleventhen。IrealisedthatImustfirstletherseethemannerofmanIwasandwhatlifemeanttomeandmustmeantoheriftheunionIcontemplatedshouldbecomeanactualfact。I
wroteletterstoher,butIdidnotgivehermyaddressorevenrequestareply。Iwasnotreadyforanywordfromher。IamnotlikeothermenandIcouldwait。AndIdid,forweeks,thenI