`BecausewhenIfeelthehumanworldisdoomed,hasdoomeditselfbyitsownmingybeastliness,thenIfeeltheColoniesaren’tfarenough。
Themoonwouldn’tbefarenough,becauseeventhereyoucouldlookbackandseetheearth,dirty,beastly,unsavouryamongallthestars:madefoulbymen。ThenIfeelI’veswallowedgall,andit’seatingmyinsideout,andnowhere’sfarenoughawaytogetaway。ButwhenIgetaturn,Iforgetitallagain。Thoughit’sashame,what’sbeendonetopeopletheselasthundredyears:menturnedintonothingbutlabour-insects,andalltheirmanhoodtakenaway,andalltheirreallife。I’dwipethemachinesoffthefaceoftheearthagain,andendtheindustrialepochabsolutely,likeablackmistake。ButsinceIcan’t,an’nobodycan,I’dbetterholdmypeace,an’tryan’livemyownlife:ifI’vegotonetolive,whichIratherdoubt。’
Thethunderhadceasedoutside,buttherainwhichhadabated,suddenlycamestrikingdown,withalastblenchoflightningandmutterofdepartingstorm。Conniewasuneasy。Hehadtalkedsolongnow,andhewasreallytalkingtohimselfnottoher。Despairseemedtocomedownonhimcompletely,andshewasfeelinghappy,shehateddespair。Sheknewherleavinghim,whichhehadonlyjustrealizedinsidehimselfhadplungedhimbackintothismood。Andshetriumphedalittle。
Sheopenedthedoorandlookedatthestraightheavyrain,likeasteelcurtain,andhadasuddendesiretorushoutintoit,torushaway。Shegotup,andbeganswiftlypullingoffherstockings,thenherdressandunderclothing,andheheldhisbreath。Herpointedkeenanimalbreaststippedandstirredasshemoved。Shewasivory-colouredinthegreenishlight。Sheslippedonherrubbershoesagainandranoutwithawildlittlelaugh,holdingupherbreaststotheheavyrainandspreadingherarms,andrunningblurredintherainwiththeeurhythmicdancemovementsshehadlearnedsolongagoinDresden。Itwasastrangepallidfigureliftingandfalling,bendingsotherainbeatandglistenedonthefullhaunches,swayingupagainandcomingbelly-forwardthroughtherain,thenstoopingagainsothatonlythefullloinsandbuttockswereofferedinakindofhomagetowardshim,repeatingawildobeisance。
Helaughedwryly,andthrewoffhisclothes。Itwastoomuch。Hejumpedout,nakedandwhite,withalittleshiver,intothehardslantingrain。