The Voyage Out

第20章

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第20章

The Voyage Out Virginia Woolf

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The Voyage Out
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  Themorningwashot,andtheexerciseofreadinglefthermindcontractingandexpandinglikethemain-springofaclock,andthesmallnoisesofmidday,whichonecanascribetonodefinitecause,inaregularrhythm。Itwasallveryreal,verybig,veryimpersonal,andafteramomentortwoshebegantoraiseherfirstfingerandtoletitfallonthearmofherchairsoastobringbacktoherselfsomeconsciousnessofherownexistence。

  Shewasnextovercomebytheunspeakablequeernessofthefactthatsheshouldbesittinginanarm-chair,inthemorning,inthemiddleoftheworld。Whowerethepeoplemovinginthehouse——

  movingthingsfromoneplacetoanother?Andlife,whatwasthat?

  Itwasonlyalightpassingoverthesurfaceandvanishing,asintimeshewouldvanish,thoughthefurnitureintheroomwouldremain。Herdissolutionbecamesocompletethatshecouldnotraiseherfingeranymore,andsatperfectlystill,listeningandlookingalwaysatthesamespot。Itbecamestrangerandstranger。Shewasovercomewithawethatthingsshouldexistatall……Sheforgotthatshehadanyfingerstoraise……Thethingsthatexistedweresoimmenseandsodesolate……Shecontinuedtobeconsciousofthesevastmassesofsubstanceforalongstretchoftime,theclockstilltickinginthemidstoftheuniversalsilence。

  “Comein,“shesaidmechanically,forastringinherbrainseemedtobepulledbyapersistentknockingatthedoor。Withgreatslownessthedooropenedandatallhumanbeingcametowardsher,holdingoutherarmandsaying:

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