Infineweatherhegenerallymanagestogetthroughthetimeprettywell；
butonrainydays，ofwhichwehavehadagoodmanyoflate，itisquitepainfultowitnesshisennui。Idoallcantoamusehim，butitisimpossibletogethimtofeelinterestedwhatImostliketotalkabout；while，ontheotherhand，helikestotalkaboutthingsthatcannotinterestme——oreventhatannoyme——andthesepleasehimthemostofall；forhisfavouriteamusementistositorlollbesidemeonthesofaandtellmestoriesofhisformeramours，alwaysturningupontheruinofsomeconfidinggirlorthecozeningofsomeunsuspectinghusband；andwhenIexpressmyhorrorandindignation，helaysitalltothechargeofjealousy，andlaughstillthetearsrundownhischeeks。Iusedtoflyintopassionsormeltintotearsatfirst，butseeingthathisdelightincreasedinproportiontomyangerandagitation，Ihavesinceendeavouredtosuppressmyfeelingsandreceivehisrevelationsinthesilenceofcalmcontempt；butstill，hereadstheinwardstruggleinmyface，andmisconstruesmybitternessofsoulforhisunworthinessintothepangsofwoundedjealousy；andwhenhehassufficientlydivertedhimselfwiththat，orfearsmydispleasurewillbecometooseriousforhiscomfort，betriestokissandsoothemeintosmilesagain——neverwerehiscaressessolittlewelcomeasthen！Thisisdoubleselfishness，displayedtomeandtothevictimsofhisformerlove。Therearetimeswhen，withamomentarypang——aflashofwilddismay，Iaskmyself，`Helen，whathaveyoudone？’ButIrebuketheinwardquestioner，andrepeltheobtrusivethoughtsthatcrowduponme；for，werehetentimesassensualandimpenetrabletogoodandloftythoughts，IwellknowIhaveDorighttocomplain。AndIdon’tandwon’tcomplain。Idoandwilllovehimstill；andIdonotandwillnotregretthatIhavelinkedmyfatewithhis。
April4th——Wehavehadadownrightquarrel。`Theparticularsareasfollows：——Arthurhadtoldme，atdifferentintervals，thewholestoryofhisintriguewithLadyF——，whichIwouldnotbelievebefore。
Itwassomeconsolation，however，tofindthat，inthisinstance，theladyhadbeenmoretoblamethanhe；forhewasveryyoungatthetime，andshehaddecidedlymadethefirstadvances，ifwhathesaidwastrue。I
hatedherforit，foritseemedasifshehadchieflycontributedtohiscorruption，andwhenhewasbeginningtotalkabouthertheotherday，Ibeggedhewouldnotmentionher，forIdetestedtheverysoundofhername，——