gaveupthelifeoftheconventionalworld，recognizingittobenolife，butaparodyonlife，whichitssuperfluitiessimplykeepusfromcomprehending。”——andTolstoythereuponembracedthelifeofthepeasants，andhasfeltrightandhappy，oratleastrelativelyso，eversince。[96]
[96]IhaveconsiderablyabridgedTolstoy’swordsinmytranslation。
AsIinterprethismelancholy，then，itwasnotmerelyanaccidentalvitiationofhishumors，thoughitwasdoubtlessalsothat。Itwaslogicallycalledforbytheclashbetweenhisinnercharacterandhisouteractivitiesandaims。Althoughaliteraryartist，Tolstoywasoneofthoseprimitiveoaksofmentowhomthesuperfluitiesandinsincerities，thecupidities，complications，andcrueltiesofourpolitecivilizationareprofoundlyunsatisfying，andforwhomtheeternalveracitiesliewithmorenaturalandanimalthings。Hiscrisiswasthegettingofhissoulinorder，thediscoveryofitsgenuinehabitatandvocation，theescapefromfalsehoodsintowhatforhimwerewaysoftruth。Itwasacaseofheterogeneouspersonalitytardilyandslowlyfindingitsunityandlevel。AndthoughnotmanyofuscanimitateTolstoy，nothavingenough，perhaps，oftheaboriginalhumanmarrowinourbones，mostofusmayatleastfeelasifitmightbebetterforusifwecould。
Bunyan’srecoveryseemstohavebeenevenslower。ForyearstogetherhewasalternatelyhauntedwithtextsofScripture，nowupandnowdown，butatlastwithanevergrowingreliefinhissalvationthroughthebloodofChrist。
“Mypeacewouldbeinandouttwentytimesaday；comfortnowandtroublepresently；peacenowandbeforeIcouldgoafurlongasfullofguiltandfearaseverheartcouldhold。”Whenagoodtextcomeshometohim，“This。”hewrites，“gavemegoodencouragementforthespaceoftwoorthreehours“；or“Thiswasagooddaytome，IhopeIshallnotforgetit“，or“ThegloryofthesewordswasthensoweightyonmethatIwasreadytoswoonasIsat；yet，notwithgriefandtrouble，butwithsolidjoyandpeace“；or“Thismadeastrangeseizureonmyspirit；itbroughtlightwithit，andcommandedasilenceinmyheartofallthosetumultuousthoughtsthatbeforediduse，likemasterlesshell-hounds，toroarandbellowandmakeahideousnoisewithinme。ItshowedmethatJesusChristhadnotquiteforsakenandcastoffmySoul。”